


Serendipity

by lullys



Series: Serendipity Verse [1]
Category: Supernatural RPF
Genre: Hurt Jared Padalecki, Hurt/Comfort, Infidelity Outside Jensen/Jared, Jensen Ackles Being an Asshole, M/M, Male Lactation, Minor Character Death, Mpreg, Pregnant Jared Padalecki, Slow Burn
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-10-17
Updated: 2020-03-15
Packaged: 2020-10-29 17:07:11
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 20
Words: 133,403
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20799986
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lullys/pseuds/lullys
Summary: Life has never been too easy on Jared, he has no family and not a lot of money, but at least he is sure he found the man of his dreams in Justin. He is also lucky enough to have his two best friends, Chad and Brock, always by his side. And the news that Jared is having a baby, even if he knows it will be a hard challenge, brings him a huge joy. But Jared’s world collapses when Justin turns out to be someone completely different than he first thought, and Jared needs to get away in order to protect himself and his baby.Everything takes another turn when Brock and him are involved in an accident that takes away his friend’s life, and Brock's mother assumes he is the father of Jared’s baby. Against his will, Jared acquiesces and goes with the plan as not to upset the sick woman and also for the chance to have a roof over his head during his pregnancy.But the biggest bump on Jared’s road is Brock’s older brother, Jensen, who is completely sure Jared wants to take advantage of his family’s money and won’t make his life easy in any way.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Hello guys! Welcome to my new story! First of all, this is my first mpreg, and I am so excited about it! Years ago I couldn't even read an mpreg fic, I found it too weird, but now I love them, have read some amazing ones and decided to write my own. 
> 
> I decided to post this fic as a WIP, because I don't think I couldn't wait for the next Big Bang to post it since it's too far away. And I am also eager to share it so I wanted to start posting. I promise to go all the way to the end, I've posted a WIP before from beginning to end, as a reader I know how frustrating it can be to see a WIP being abandoned by the author. I promise I'll post regularly. Also, you can subscribe to the story and/or to my profile so you can get notificaions when this is updated.
> 
> Just an FYI, I added more pairings to the "relationship" tags just as warning, so you guys know all you're going to find in this story. The main pairing in this is of course Jared and Jensen, everything else is secondary.
> 
> This idea isn't exactly mine. I borrowed this plot actually from a soap opera that aired in Brazil in 2010, I watched it at the time and fell in love with these two characters. I started watching again recently on streaming and decided that sory would make a perfect J2 mpreg AU, it had all the right elements. So I'm gonna borrow some scenes here and there that are too good not to, but mainly I'm gonna give this story my own touch, give it the J2 style. I'm very exciting to be giving new life to this fictional couple that I like so much, specially in the form of Jared and Jensen. Just and FYI, I'm gonna be following most of the original story at the beginning, but later I'm gonna go on a different direction that I think it will fit better with what I have in mind. So it won't be a complete remake like others stories I wrote.
> 
> I hope you guys enjoy it, even if mpreg is not your thing, I truly hope you can give it a try (I promise there won't be anything too graphic). And please if you can, leave me a comment so I know what you guys are thinking of it, you guys are my thermometer!
> 
> A huge shoutout to my beta Mag, for all the help as usual, and also for Heather for the ideas and the support! Also, of course to my amazing artist Kelly who agreed to make a beautiful, perfect banner for this story and also the chapters headers. You guys are amazing!
> 
> So here we go again!

_ “The best love story is when you fall in love with the most unexpected person at the most unexpected time.  
When love feels like magic it’s called destiny; when destiny has a sense of humor it’s serendipity.”_

_ _

** _Jared_ **

Two lines.

Jared had been a bundle of anxiety for the past few minutes, ever since he peed into a cup, stuck the test in it and then let it sit on the flat surface of the sink for the few minutes it took for the thing to… work. When the time was up, Jared took a few deep breaths and took the stick from the sink with his eyes closed. Sitting on the closed toilet lid, it took him a good three minutes to open his eyes. When he did, he had to blink a few times to make sure what he was seeing was real.

Two pink lines.

He is _pregnant._

Jared can’t tell what exactly is going on inside of him right now, it’s a huge mixture of emotions. He always knew he was a carrier, the doctor told his grandma when Jared was just a child. Jared never had a problem with it, quite the opposite actually. He always found it fascinating, the ability to carry a child. And Jared always wanted to, but he always imagined it would happen when he was married, with a stable job and full resources to raise a child. Not like this, when Jared himself and his boyfriend are broke as fuck.

Justin.

Jared thinks about Justin and it has an instant calming effect on him. Jared is sure Justin will love the idea, even if it means it will be hard on both of them. They had never discussed having children of their own. Justin doesn’t even know Jared is a carrier, for some reason Jared decided to put off telling him. Probably because Jared was afraid to scare Justin away, this kind of information sometimes has that effect on people. But even if they haven’t been together for a long time, Jared loves Justin with all his heart, he is completely and 100% sure he is _the one_. And from what Justin tells Jared, he feels the same way. Jared doesn’t know what he did to deserve such an amazing man. It doesn’t matter that neither of them have a lot of money, hell, Jared doesn’t even have a family anymore. But he is positive he and Justin will eventually be successful, and more importantly, together.

And now, they are gonna have something - someone - else to unite them even more.

Jared brings a hand to his flat stomach, and his eyes instantly fill with tears. His child is growing inside of him, there’s a tiny, tiny human being in him. And even if he has known this fact for a whole five minutes now, he already loves it. Not _it_. A him. Or a her. Whatever. It’s his child and Jared already knows he is gonna fight tooth and nail for them.

Jared tries to think back to when they must have conceived, Justin always wears a condom at Jared’s insistence (he uses the excuse they have yet to be tested so they can go without), but there was that one time they went out to the night club - it was Chad’s birthday - and came back to Jared’s tiny apartment more than a little tipsy. It was the only time they fucked without a condom, but Jared had assumed he was safe, he was not ovulating - at least he didn’t think so. Clearly he was.

Jared had started feeling off a couple weeks ago, feeling nauseated all the time, and even throwing up every other day. He had brushed it off as a stomach bug at first, but then he started getting suspicious when the nausea and the odd feeling altogether wouldn’t leave him. He decided to take a pregnancy test_ just in case_, and here he is now.

He is going to be a father. At only 24, no college degree, a crappy job and even crappier apartment, and he is going to be a father. No other possibility even crosses his mind, he is having this baby no matter the challenges that lie ahead of him. Jared tries to do the math in his head, Chad’s party was about a month and a half ago, so he counts the months to see when he is supposed to give birth. He doesn’t understand anything about weeks, he is gonna have to see a doctor about that, but eight months from now will be June. So maybe Jared’s baby will be born in June, a month before his own birthday. A little wave of excitement starts to slowly grow inside of him.

Jared is gonna have a child.

*

“What? You’re pregnant?” Chad mumbles around the sandwich he has been eating. “Really?”

Jared shrugs as he swallows a bite of his own sandwich. “Well, if two lines still mean positive, then yeah. I’m p--pregnant.”

It still feels weird to say it out loud. Jared knows he should probably have told the father of the baby first, but he just had to share it with his two best friends first. They are the closest thing he has to a family - well, maybe Justin, him and the baby can form their own family someday - the people Jared trusts the most, and it just felt right to tell them first. Plus, if he is being honest, he is still a bit wary about telling Justin and he could use some advice on how to broach the subject.

Chad just stares at him with eyes as wide as saucers and a mouthful of food hanging open. Brock gives his boyfriend a glance and chuckles, then sets his sandwich on the coffee table and leans forward, facing Jared with a serious but fond expression.

“Jare, that has to be a shock for you, I’m sure.” Jared nods briefly. Brock and Chad are the only two people who know Jared is a carrier, at least people who are still alive. So at least the part that he is able to get pregnant isn’t news to them. “What are you thinking of doing about it? You know we will support you in any decision you make.”

Even Chad has turned serious now, and he nods to indicate he agrees with what Brock just said. Jared is so happy he has these two amazing friends to have his back always. He gives them a small smile.

“I’m keeping him, or her. I know life isn’t easy for me and it will be even harder once the baby comes, I know it would be much better to just wait a few more years before thinking about this, and I normally would, but…” Jared takes a deep breath and unconsciously rubs his stomach. “But it’s my child, my baby. I just, just can’t. I want them so bad already.”

Brock gives Jared a fond smile, noticing how Jared already protects his middle even without any visible indications that there’s someone in there. “That’s great, Jare. And we will be here for you 100% in everything we can do to help.” Brock lifts an eyebrow and turns serious again. “Have you told Justin yet?”

Jared looks down and shakes his head shortly. “No, not yet. I still need to gather the courage to do it.”

Chad finally finishes his sandwich and speaks up. “Does he know you’re a carrier? Have you guys discussed children?”

Jared still doesn’t look up as he answers. “No and no. Was afraid to tell him. Didn’t know how he was gonna react, we never discussed that part of the future. I mean, he has mentioned wanting kids someday but I’m sure he never thought he would have one now, and unplanned as it is.” Jared finally looks up and faces both of his friends. “But even if by any chance he doesn’t want this child, I’m still keeping them. It’s my child, no matter what.”

Brock gives Jared and encouraging smile. “That’s right Jare. And I’m sure Justin will love it, he is a great guy. It’s gonna be hard on both of you for sure, maybe Justin will need a second job, but you will figure out. And as I said, we are here to help as well.”

Chad smiles wide at that. “Damn right! This kid will be so lucky to have an awesome uncle Chad around!”

The three of them stare at one another for a moment and then start laughing, allowing some of the tension to drain, and when everyone has calmed down, they start discussing names and if Jared is having a boy or a girl. Jared couldn’t be more grateful for his friends, he knows that no matter what happens, he and his child are gonna be okay.

*

It takes Jared two days to gather courage and talk to Justin. Thankfully they don’t see each other for two whole days because they have been working a lot - Jared started doing some extra hours at the diner he works at to try and save some money - but on Thursday Justin messages Jared saying he misses him and wants to meet up after work, he wants to talk, and Jared decides this is it. He _thinks_ Justin is gonna be okay with it, it’s true that they have been together for only three months but Justin has given hints that he wants a future with Jared so it should be fine. So they meet up at the park at 8 pm, Jared goes straight from work, and then they can have dinner at the Burger King across the street.

Justin is already there when Jared shows up, and he instantly smiles at the sight of his boyfriend, his gorgeous and perfect boyfriend. Sometimes Jared wonders how he got so lucky. Justin smiles back at him and as Jared approaches, he’s pulled into a tight hug, and then a long kiss.

“Hmm, missed you.” Justin murmurs as he plants a kiss to the corner of Jared’s mouth, who smiles and feels himself relaxing.

“Missed you too, babe.” Suddenly Jared’s heart fills with courage and determination, he suddenly can’t wait to tell Justin the great albeit shocking news.

Jared holds Justin’s face with both hands and smiles brightly at his adored boyfriend. “Jus, I know you said you wanted to talk, but I have something to tell you, something amazing.”

Justin’s eyebrows rise and he gives Jared an amused smile, obviously picking up on Jared’s excitement. “What is it Jare?”

Jared takes a deep breath to calm his nerves and looks straight into Justin’s eyes. “I’m pregnant.”

Justin’s expression is blank for a handful of heartbeats, and a slow frown starts forming on his face. When he speaks, his voice is just a whisper. “What?”

Jared tries to keep his voice steady as his smile threatens to falter. “I’m pregnant, Jus! I know it’s completely unexpected, it was a surprise to me as well, but we are having a baby! I know it’s gonna be hard on both of us, we will need to work extra but I know this child will be surrounded by love and that’s what matters! Isn’t it great?”

Justin suddenly turns deadly serious and reaches up with both hands, to remove Jared’s from his face, and they fall to the sides.

“Jared, why did you never tell me you were a carrier?”

Justin’s voice is ice cold and Jared feels his heartbeat speeding up, anxiousness creeping in.

“I--I don’t know, I was afraid to scare you off, I was waiting a bit more to say it and--”

“Oh my God, I am such an idiot! You really caught me, huh?”

Jared swallows hard, not understanding what’s going on, and he suddenly finds it hard to breathe.

“What--what are you talking about Jus? It was a shock to me as well, I never--”

Justin walks past Jared to put distance between them, and cuts him off again.

“You were playing me this whole time, huh Jared? You knew I was rich and planned this whole thing, good job!”

Justin starts mock clapping and Jared feels confused, trying to understand what Justin is saying because nothing makes sense. Did he just say he is _rich_?

“Excuse me, what?” Jared turns around to face Justin again. “You’re rich? But you always said you had no money, that you--”

“Oh come on Jared, please, drop the act! You can’t fool anyone anymore, I get it now. You knew who I was, Justin Hartley, son of Mark Hartley, from Hartley Industries. One of the most powerful families in San Antonio. You made up a whole plan to seduce me and end up having a kid so you would be all set up for the rest of your life. Good job, I fell for it just as you planned.”

Jared feels his heart sinking inch by inch, this can’t be happening. _Hartley_?

“But…” Jared shakes his head, trying to clear his mind so he can just _think_. “But… you told me your name was Justin Pearson, why would you… why would you lie to me like that? Why wouldn’t you tell me you were rich?”

Justin scoffs, his expression completely closed off. “To see if you really cared about me for who I am! Do you have any idea how many people approach me, only interested in my money? I wanted to see if you were different, so I decided to make a test. Sadly you knew from the beginning and just played along when I lied about my name and who I was.”

There are a thousand things going inside Jared’s mind right now, it’s so much to process, but at this very moment a new feeling takes ahold of him: he is _furious_. He closes the distance between himself and Justin and shoves the man with two hands on his chest.

“You asshole! You fucking lied to me Justin, you lied all this time, you made me believe you were someone you are not, you made me believe you loved me but you were just toying with me! What the fuck is wrong with you?”

Jared feels tears prickling behind his eyes but he holds them back, he won’t give Justin the satisfaction. Justin narrows his eyes at him. “Come on Jared, enough with this circus! Who are you to say anything about lying? You never told me you were a carrier, you planned this whole thing in advance so you would have a child with me. But don’t worry, you will be all set, I won’t escape my responsibilities. Your plan worked just fine.”

Jared studies Justin for a long moment and slowly shakes his head, refusing to believe what’s happening. One moment Justin is the love of his life, they are gonna have a baby and it’s gonna be hard because neither of them have too much money but it’s also gonna be okay because they will be together. And in the next Justin is someone else completely, he’s accusing Jared of being a liar and everything is falling apart. It’s like Jared can literally feel his world crumbling into dust all around him.

“You accuse me of all of these horrible things, but _you_ are the one who lied to me from the beginning Justin. You are the one who ended up being someone else completely different than you said, not me! Don’t you see you are the one who was caught up in your ridiculous plan? I never lied about anything, I know I didn’t tell you about being a carrier but as I said, I was afraid about how you were gonna react. That’s why I insisted we always wear condoms, I didn’t think one single night would result in this but it did. And I feel so, so sorry for you, for having to do something like this to learn if someone really likes you for who you are. I was always myself with you, all along. I gave 100% of myself to you and you were only lying to me, playing with me. But you know what? Even though I am the one with zero money, no family and not a clue what I am gonna do from now on,_ you_ are the one I feel sorry for. Goodbye Justin.”

Jared turns around to leave, knowing he won’t be able to hold it together much longer, but Justin grabs his arm.

“Jared.”

Jared yanks his arm free of him, feeling as if his touch suddenly burns his skin. “Let me go!”

Jared walks with long strides, desperately needing to put as much distance between himself and Justin as possible, tears finally streaming down his face, his heart breaking into a million pieces and falling to the ground.

Jared considers going back home but ends up at Brock and Chad’s doorstep instead, not really knowing how he ended up there. He is blind with tears, his whole body shaking and an unimaginable pain creeping in, his chest feels tight and it’s hard to breathe, there’s a lump in his throat and his head is spinning._ This can’t be happening_.

Chad opens the door, did Jared ring the doorbell? He can’t really recall it, and it doesn’t matter. Chad takes one look at Jared’s face and is instantly on alert.

“What happened Jared??”

Jared tries to speak but his throat feels closed off, he starts sobbing uncontrollably now that his friend is here and manages to mumble a few incoherent words.

“Justin… he doesn’t… lied… I left… and…”

Jared can’t speak anymore and he feels himself going numb, as if his legs can’t carry him anymore and they finally give in.

All Jared hears is his friend saying _shit_ and rushing forward to catch him. “Brock come on out here!”

There’s a faint sound of steps and the alarmed voice of his other friend, but it’s like Jared can’t see him, everything is foggy. He feels himself being supported by the two of them, one on each side, and together they help Jared walk inside. He can barely feel the ground underneath him.

Everything is a blank and the next thing Jared knows, he’s lying on the couch and there’s something wet on his forehead. He slowly opens his eyes and finds Chad staring down at him, a frown on his face.

“Hey Jare. Better now?”

That is a stupid question but Jared nods weakly. He tries to sit up and Chad helps him, removing the thing from his forehead - a wet cloth. Jared takes a few moments trying to collect himself, he closes his eyes , taking a few deep breaths. When he opens them again, he finds both his friends sitting in front of him, with matching worried faces.

“Jared, you scared the shit out of us, dude. It looked like you were dying or something.”

Jared looks down in embarrassment for scaring his friends like that. “Sorry,” he mumbles.

Brock moves to sit next to him and places a comforting hand on his knee. “Don’t need to apologize, Jare. We were worried about you, still are. Can you tell us what happened? Was it Justin?”

Jared nods shortly, still looking down. “Did you tell him about the baby? Is this what caused all of that?”

Another nod to confirm it. Chad lets out a _son of a bitch _but Jared can sense Brock giving him a stern look to shut his boyfriend up.

“Jare, if you want to tell us we are here for you, you know that. Or if you want to take your time and get some rest, it’s fine too.”

Jared considers it for a second and realizes he wants -_ needs_ \- to talk to his friends, that’s why he came here after all.

“No, it’s… it’s okay.” So Jared proceeds to tell his closest friends everything that went down between Justin and him. It’s not easy and Jared has to stop to collect himself here and there, tears running down his face as he relieves the nightmare that happened. He suddenly feels ashamed, thinking his friends are gonna say he was too dumb and naive to believe everything Justin told him, that he should have been smarter, known Justin was up to something. Jared is unaware he voices these sentiments out loud, and when he realizes Chad is sitting right in front of him with a firm hand on his shoulder.

“Jare, you are not dumb, and not naive. Justin is an asshole, he lied to you and made you believe he was someone else. He is the one who should be ashamed of his actions. The thing I want the most right now is to go after him and kick his ass from here to Mexico!” Chad looks at Brock and back at Jared. “But I won’t!”

Jared shakes his head slowly and leans back against the couch, looking at the ceiling. “I just… I have no idea what am I gonna do now. I mean, I know I’m broke and it’s gonna be hard anyway but at least I thought I’d have Justin with me, we would go through this together, you know? But now…” Jared brings a hand to his stomach, rubbing a few times as if wishing to warm his baby up and comfort them. “Now it’s just me and my baby, I’m all alone to go through all of this. I’m gonna be a single parent at 24, with barely any means to support myself, let alone a child. I always thought that if I would have a child someday it was going to be when I was able to give them everything, you know? Maybe this is craziness, there’s no way I can do this by myself.”

Suddenly, Jared lifts his head back up and faces his friends, desperation taking ahold of him. “Do you guys think I should… I should--I mean, maybe e--end it?” Fresh tears start to run down Jared’s face as he speaks those words, an agonizing pain piercing through his heart just imagining this possibility. But it’s the only option he has now that Justin left him.

Brock places warm hands on Jared’s face, turning his head towards him. “Jared, no. Please don’t say that. I mean, if that’s what you _really_ wanted, you know Chad and I would support you 100%. But we all know how much you wanted this child from the very first moment you became aware of their existence. It’s written on your face that you want to have this baby and an abortion would kill you. A thousand times more than being heartbroken over Justin. We are not talking about a boyfriend leaving you Jare, we are talking about the life of a child, a child you _want to have. _I know you, and I know this would leave a deep mark on you forever. You are saying this because you’re not in your right mind right now and you’re desperate, not knowing what to do. But you are not alone Jare, we are here for you, you have us. We are gonna help you in every way we can, you know that. You are our family and we got your back, yours and the baby’s. If you think it through for the next couple days and decide it’s something you really want to go through with, we are gonna be behind you in this. But you can’t decide anything right now, not in the state you’re in. And remember Jare, this is _your_ baby, it doesn’t matter that Justin doesn’t want anything to do with them. It’s his loss. I know for sure you are gonna make an amazing father and love this child more than anything. And you’re strong, you’ll figure everything out, you know it. And as I said, we are here for you, 100%.”

Jared is tired of crying but hearing his friends words, he can help the new flow of tears. Brock is right, he _wants_ this child, he always did, from the first moment. He can’t believe he even thought about the other alternative just because Justin is gone. It’s his child and Jared is gonna fight for them, for both of them. Jared only nods, not being able to form words, and his friends get it. He allows himself to be pulled into two strong hugs and tries his best to hug back. Despite everything, Jared is lucky to have Brock and Chad. He really doesn’t know what he would do without them.

Jared stays the night, he takes a nice warm shower and Chad makes him a hot cocoa with cookies, since Jared couldn’t eat much else. They gave Jared the option to watch a movie but he decided to just go to bed in their spare room, wishing for some time alone. Before going though, he thanked his friends again for everything. Jared lies in bed for hours, not being able to sleep. He feels numb and devastated, as if everything was taken from him in just a matter of hours. Jared knows he will be okay eventually, he has to, he has someone else to think about now. Jared brings his hand to his stomach, hoping he would be able to feel his child there but of course it’s too early. He rubs his hand over it and whispers, lowering his head and speaking directly to his child for the first time.

“Hey peanut… It’s Jared. I mean, daddy. Sorry about what I said earlier, I didn’t mean it. I want you to know I love you very much, okay? It’s gonna be just you and me but we are gonna be fine. We will make a hell of a team. It’s gonna be okay, my baby. I will try to be enough, alright?”

That night, Jared cries himself to sleep.

*

Jared calls in sick the next day. He knows he shouldn’t, he needs all the hours he can take, but he just can’t bring himself to get out of bed and be a functional human being. Justin destroyed him in one night and Jared needs a little time to rebuild himself enough to function again. Thankfully Chad is off today so he keeps Jared company, he cooks lunch for them - forcing Jared to eat everything and using the baby to convince him - and they watch a couple of movies.

In the afternoon, Jared asks Chad to go with him to the local Planned Parenthood. He wants to really make sure he’s pregnant indeed, and see if they can help him in any way. So Chad drives them, Jared feels nervous but tries to calm himself down.

Arriving at the place, they are welcomed by a smiling woman at the reception, and Jared explains his situation. He feels his cheeks blushing, but the woman assures him that it’s okay. Jared is sent to another room and a nurse welcomes him, giving him a cup to pee in.

“We are going to do a urine test. Even if you already had one, it’s more accurate when done by a professional,” she explains to him.

So Jared does as asked and pees in the cup, giving it to the woman. She asks him to wait, and Jared fidgets the whole time. He is sure he’s pregnant, he can _feel_ it. But he needs to make sure so he can start figuring out what to do with his life.

The nurse returns and sits down next to Jared, showing him the test which has a digital display and he can read the word _positive_ on the small display. He lets out a breath and looks at the nurse.

“Jared, the test confirmed you are really pregnant. Now, I must ask you if this is something you want, because we can discuss your options. You can also talk to a counselor if you wish.”

Jared shakes his head, completely convinced of his choice. “No, I don’t need to talk to anyone, I know what I want. I really want to have this child.” Jared tries but can’t hold back a tear that escapes his eye as he now knows for sure there’s a tiny human in him.

The nurse smiles at him. “That’s good. Since you know you’re keeping the baby, you need to start your care. We can set up an appointment for a prenatal exam, is that okay?”

Jared agrees, with everything that happened he completely forgot he actually needed to go see a doctor and take care of his baby, make sure everything is going okay. So the nurse takes Jared to the reception and the woman there sets up an appointment for next week. Jared thanks her and turns to Chad who had been waiting in the reception area for him. His friend gets up from the chair and looks at him with widened eyes.

“So?? Am I really gonna be an uncle?”

Jared shows him the pregnancy test the nurse allowed him to take home. “I guess so.”

“That’s awesome Jare!” Chad pulls Jared for a tight hug, and he hugs his friend back just as intensely, allowing some tears to fall.

“I think so too,” Jared murmurs against Chad’s shoulder. Despite everything, it _is_ really awesome.

*

Jared is feeling human enough to go to work the next morning. He spent another night at his friends’ apartment at their insistence, Chad brought him back after their visit to Planned Parenthood, they had dinner, and both him and Brock had claimed it was too late for Jared to go back home. But before work Jared goes back to his own apartment for a shower and a change of clothes since he had been wearing Chad’s ever since he showed up at their doorstep the other night.

Jared gets off the bus and quickly walks to the diner keeping his head down, but just as he’s almost there someone blocks his way. As Jared looks up to make his way around, his heart skips a beat.

“Hello, Jared.” Justin is looking at him coldly and Jared composes himself to return it equally.

“What do you want? I need to get to work.”

“I needed to see you.” Justin reaches out to touch Jared, but he backs away from his touch.

“Why? So you would throw in my face again how I lied to you, how you think I played you? How I am a golddigger? I think I got that the first time, thank you very much.”

Jared tries to walk past Justin, but he hurries to position himself in front of Jared again.

“Look, I want you to know I won’t run away from my responsibilities, okay? If I have to, I will register this child and give it everything it will need. In fact, I was talking to my dad and we have come to the conclusion that it would be for the best interest of this child that you give it to us, so we can raise it. I can assure you everything it needs, it’s gonna be provided, you wouldn’t have to worry about anything anymore and you can go on with your life. I promise you that you are going to be well rewarded for it, like you planned. That is of course, after we do a DNA test once the baby is born to make sure it’s really my child.”

Jared looks at Justin for a few moments in utter disbelief. He keeps calling their child an _it_, what is wrong with this man? Then something else he said penetrates his mind.

_Justin wants to take his baby away from Jared. _

And he much likely can do it, he’s the other father and his family is rich and powerful, it would be almost too easy to get custody of Jared’s child since he has little means to raise his child on his own. Jared is alarmed by it, and he needs to think fast since Justin is waiting.

_What do I do??_

The solution hits him like a brick.

Jared puts a look of disdain on his face, trying not to show how fast his heart is beating. “That would be awesome wouldn’t it, Justin? I’d surely love that just like you said. Too bad there is no baby at all.”

Jared walks away but Justin follows. “What did you say? You’re not pregnant?”

Jared stops once again to face his ex-boyfriend. “No.”

Justin raises his eyebrows at him. “Oh, so you lied about that as well? What was this? Another test?”

Jared points a finger at Justin’s face. “No, I didn’t lie! I thought I was pregnant but it was a mistake, I went to Planned Parenthood yesterday and they took another test just to make sure, and it came out negative.” Jared rummages inside his backpack where his pregnancy test still is and takes it out, offering it to Justin with the display turned down.

“Take a look if you don’t trust me, because apparently you don’t believe a word I say. Take it!” Jared silently prays Justin doesn’t see he’s bluffing and doesn’t take the offered test to check for himself.

Justin looks at the test and then back at Jared, and his expression very slowly changes, becoming softer. He looks at Jared with something in his eyes that could be defined as regret.

“Jared, I’m sorry, I…” Justin closes the distance between them but Jared jumps away.

“Get the fuck away from me! I don’t want anything to do with you ever again! You lied to me, you doubted my intentions towards you, you laughed at my love for you, you wanted to do a fucking DNA test because you doubted it was your child. Never, ever come after me again. Go find someone who’s at your level and can give you what you want. And please, next time think long and hard before doing something like this again. You are not above right and wrong Justin. Goodbye.”

Jared quickly walks away, leaving a stunned Justin behind. He completely misses how Justin asks himself _what the fuck did I do? _

Jared walks into the diner and goes straight to the bathroom, clearly shaken after his encounter with Justin. The biggest thing going through his mind is that they can take his baby away. Jared has no doubt Justin would do it if he thinks their child would have a better chance of a future with his family. Maybe it’s true, if Jared gave his baby to Justin and his family, they would provide everything for his child.

But he can’t do that, it’s his child, his baby. An unimaginable pain takes ahold of Jared just thinking about giving up on his baby. Yes, it’s gonna be hard but Jared knows he can figure it out, the only thing he can’t take is having his child be taken away from his arms. No, he won’t allow that. And Jared knows if he stays, Justin will end up learning that Jared is indeed pregnant. So there’s only one option for him.

Jared needs to leave.

**TO BE CONTINUED...**


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> guys, thank you so much for reading the first chapter and for all the amazing comments!!! I really appreciate all of them, I'm glad you guys are enjoying this story, I also am, so much! Please lemme know what you guys are thinking, your thoughts make me so happy!
> 
> here's chapter 2, and we are gonna meet Jensen for the first time!

_ _

_ **Jared** _

“Justin offered _what_??” Chad asks with a horrified look on his face as Jared tells his friends that night about the offer Justin made. He had called and asked to come over, this subject couldn’t wait any longer.

“What you just heard,” he answers Chad as he swallows hard. “He offered to raise my baby because they can provide everything to them. I can’t allow that, I know it would be probably better since they have money and I don’t, but…”

“No Jare, it doesn’t matter, you can’t do that.” Brock says as he leans forward and rests his elbows on his knees. “Even if they have money, that child has to stay with you.”

“I know. I would never give them my baby.” Jared stares at both his friends. “That’s why I need to leave. If I stay in San Antonio, there’s a high probability that Justin will eventually learn the truth and take my baby from me. His family is powerful and they can do just that. I need to leave so Justin will never find out about this child.”

“But where will you go, Jare?”

Jared lowers his head, mumbling as he stares into his hands. “I have no idea.”

Brock grabs his shoulder. “Jare.” He waits until Jared looks at him to continue. “You could come with me to Dallas.”

Jared frowns. “I didn’t know you were going to Dallas.” He knew that’s where his friend is from and where his family lives, but he doesn’t talk about them much and never went back there ever since Jared first met him. All Jared knows is that they don’t get along very well because Brock refused to follow the family business and moved away so he could do what he loves.

Brock shrugs and looks conflicted. “Well, I’m not dying to go, but I have to. I think I mentioned how my mom has cancer and is going through a hard treatment. She has called me a few times saying she misses me and my dad also called, asking me to come back home to see her since she’s too fragile after the chemo sessions. He made me feel like an awful son because I didn’t take their calls at first. He left me a message threatening to come to San Antonio to convince me to go home. So I figured I’ll go over for a couple of days to check on her, I’m not gonna lie, I’m worried about her. Despite everything, she’s my mom.”

Jared gives him a sympathetic smile. “You’re right, she’s your mom and you must go see her. But I don’t know what I would do in Dallas, I don’t know anyone there. Well, I don’t know anyone anywhere to be honest.”

Brock thinks for a few moments before offering a solution. “Well, you could go with me and we can figure something out. There’s a boathouse on my parents’ property, it actually used to be my place, I always preferred to live there instead of my room in the main house. I can ask my family to let you stay there for a little while, they owe me one for coming over. Also they owe a big fashion business, I’m sure they can get you a job, they are always hiring new people, and I have some friends that can help finding a cheap place to stay. I’m sure we can figure something out. I’m sure my parents will be fine with you staying there, despite the fact we are not on the best terms they are good people and we can explain your situation. There’s only my brother Jensen who as I’ve told you already, is kind of an asshole who thinks only about himself and nothing else, but I doubt he will be an issue, deep down he’s a good person, _very _deep down. I think it’s the best solution we can come up to your situation right now. I’m driving up in two days if you want to come.”

Jared considers the offer for a while. It’s gonna be hard leaving San Antonio, but he knows it’s the only option he has if he doesn’t want Justin and his family to take his baby from him. So he nods, tears forming behind his eyes.

“It’s gonna be so hard leaving you guys, but… I think it’s indeed for the best. I’d do anything to protect my baby. So I guess we are going to Dallas.”

*

During the next couple of days, Jared takes care of everything so he can leave to Dallas. He talks to his landlord about vacating the apartment, packs his mere belongings and quits his job at the diner. Jared spends his last couple of nights in San Antonio at his friends’ place, where he feels safest since he doesn’t want to risk Justin coming after him. He has called Jared a few times but he hasn’t answered, and also ignored the numerous texts.

On Monday it’s finally time for them to leave to Dallas. Jared gets emotional having to leave his hometown behind, this is all he knows. He’s going to a city he doesn’t know, he has no idea what’s gonna happen to him and he’s scared.

They load everything in Brock’s car and Jared hugs Chad goodbye, long and hard. They aren’t too good with words but Jared is so thankful for his friend, for everything he has always done for him, and he tries to convey all of that in a tight hug. He knows Chad gets it, and Jared also gets what Chad is trying to say without words.

“Keep in touch okay, Jare? I promise I’ll be there when the baby comes and I want to know everything about how it’s going, alright?”

Jared nods, seeing his friend with red eyes. It’s not often Chad gets emotional and it brings tears to Jared’s own eyes. “You take care too, Chad.”

Jared then gets into the car to give some space for Chad and Brock to have their own moment, and looks away as not to invade it. By the time Brock gets behind the wheel, his eyes are also suspiciously red. Chad leans down to talk to them through the car window.

“Call me when you get to Dallas, okay? Drive safe.” He plants a sweet kiss to Brock’s mouth. “Love you.”

Brock smiles back. “Love you too babe. See you soon.”

*

They have been driving for a couple of hours and Jared has dozed off for most of them, everything that happened having finally taken its toll on him. By the time he fully wakes up it’s raining heavily.

“Whoa, it’s really pouring… Brock don’t you think we should pull over for a while? Until the rain at least slows down a bit?”

Brock looks over at Jared and shakes his head. “Nah, it’s kinda dangerous to pullover here especially at nighttime. Let’s see if we can find a place to stop somewhere, okay?”

Jared agrees as his phone rings, and it’s of course Justin again. He decides to block his number so he’s not bothered again. Brock gives him a knowing look but Jared just shakes his head.

“I don’t want to talk to him ever again.”

Brock nods and as a song comes on the radio he’s excited, and turns up the volume. “I love this song, it reminds me of my childhood. Despite everything, it was a good childhood, I can’t deny that. I have some fond memories.”

Jared smiles sadly. “Well, you’re going back to the place you spent your childhood… and I’m getting away from mine.”

Brock places a soothing hand on Jared’s knee. “It’s gonna be fine, Jare. You’ll see. I told my mom I’m bringing a friend with me and she’s excited to meet you.”

Jared raises an eyebrow at him. “Really?”

Brock looks over and smiles. “Pinky promise.”

Jared smiles back and looks ahead. Everything that happens next is a huge blur.

There’s a semi coming towards them. It shouldn’t be in this lane. Jared screams and grabs the wheel. There’s a shocked expression on Brock’s face. The world suddenly turns violently to the right and everything turns and turns.

It’s all black.

_ **Jensen** _

God, Jensen is so tired. Jeff and him spent the whole fucking day at a models selection for the agency, he swears to fucking God if he sees another skinny pale girl he’s gonna stab his eyes. He loves his agency, don’t get him wrong, but sometimes it gets too repetitive, more of the same. Lather, rinse, repeat.

He calls his mother to see how the chemo session went, but his father answers instead saying Donna is asleep. She is usually exhausted after those. Jensen just wishes those would be over soon. He’s actually glad Brock is arriving later tonight, maybe that will cheer his mom up a bit. Lately she has been crying all over the house because she misses her favorite son - she doesn’t actually uses these words but Jensen knows it’s true, always has. Brock has always been way closer to Donna than Jensen, a true momma’s boy. Brock didn’t have many friends as a child so he’d rather stay inside keeping their mom company. Jensen always had other interests, and from a young age he would follow his father to the modeling agency he owns. Jensen always took great interesting in photography, always loved to see the photoshoots that happened there. He ended up opening his own agency with Jeff, affiliated to his father’s main agency, and that’s where he spends most of his time. When he’s not, well, somewhere else.

But anyway, it’s a good thing Brock has finally decided to gift the family with his presence. Jensen kind of resents his brother for leaving like that, for never taking any interest in the family business, preferring to move to San Antonio to work as a journalist because he always loved writing - always said his dream was to publish a book. Jensen has no idea if Brock is working on that or not. He doesn’t know much about his brother’s life to be honest, they barely keep in touch, not too many things in common. Jensen knows Brock has a boyfriend who lives with him but doesn’t even know the name of the guy. Jensen always knew Brock was gay so that part doesn’t surprise him. And well, it’s not like Jensen is in any position to judge, being bi himself.

Jensen returns to his office and pours himself a glass of whiskey, sitting down at his desk to try and relax. The door opens without a knock and sure enough Jeff walks in.

“I guess it’s safe to say we had a productive day today.”

Jensen just raises an eyebrow at him. “Yay, we got ourselves another batch of models that look just the same as the ones we already have. Awesome!”

Jeff positions himself behind Jensen and starts massaging his shoulders, clearly feeling the tension pouring out of him.

“Plans with Danni tonight?”

Jensen shakes his head, having completely forgotten about his fianceé. “Nah, she’s going to dinner with her mother, she mentioned yesterday they were spending the whole day running errands for the wedding.”

Jeff lightly pinches Jensen’s shoulder. “Awesome. We can go to my place then.”

Jensen doesn’t deny it and hurries to finish his whiskey. He could really use the opportunity to relax.

*

A couple of hours later, Jensen is lying on Jeff’s bed with the man by his side. He’s feeling sated after the awesome sex and he just lies there for a while with his eyes closed. He’s gonna take some time before he has enough energy to go back home. He would love to just spend the night but his mom would probably get suspicious since she knows he is not with Danneel, and Brock is probably arriving soon and Jensen is expected to be there to welcome his brother.

“So…” Jeff starts, making Jensen open his eyes and look at the man as he smokes a cigarrette, he always does that after they fuck even knowing Jensen doesn’t like it. “How are the wedding preparations going?”

Jensen shrugs. “Good, I guess. Danneel and her mother are taking care of everything.”

Jeff looks pointedly at him. “You could at least pretend you’re a bit more interested in this wedding, you know? It’s not only showing up at the designated day.”

Jensen returns the look. “You’re the one who’s so interested in this wedding, it’s almost like you are the groom.”

“It’s just that I know Danneel is the right girl for you, that’s all. You two are gonna make a perfect happy couple.”

Jensen scoffs. “Jeff, please.” Before Jensen can say anything else though, his phone rings. When he checks the display he sees it’s his dad. Brock must have arrived.

“Hey dad,” Jensen greets and Alan’s tone puts him immediately on alert.

“Jensen? Son where are you?”

Jensen sits up in bed, suddenly serious. “I’m with Jeff going through some stuff for the agency, dad. Why? What happened?”

“There has been an accident.”

*

Jeff drives Jensen to the hospital since he left his own car at the agency. His father didn’t say how Brock was but his tone was not optimistic at all. Jensen is nervous during the whole car ride, anxious to know how is his brother.

When they finally arrive Jensen rushes in and goes to the third floor, following his father’s earlier instructions. Arriving there he finds both his parents, his mother crying inconsolably and his father trying to comfort her. He looks up at Jensen with red-rimmed eyes, and his voice comes out hoarse.

“Brock is gone.”

Jensen feels dizzy all of the sudden, this can’t be happening. His brother is gone. How is this possible?

Everything passes in a blur, his mother is falling apart and Jensen has to suck it up to comfort her. He has no idea what’s gonna happen to her now, she adored Brock and suffered so much with the fact that he went to live away from them. Now with him gone forever… Donna’s treatment is already hard on her, with this tragedy on top Jensen doesn’t know how it’s gonna be for her. All he knows is that he’s gonna have to be the strong one to hold everything together, since his father is also clearly breaking down on the inside even with his strong façade.

What is gonna happen now?

Jensen remembers going in a cold room to see his brother’s body, and it feels like he is watching the whole thing from above, like his soul has detached from his body. It’s so weird to see Brock there, lifeless. He also looks older, has it really been that long since Jensen last saw him?

There’s so much shit to take care of that Jensen doesn’t even have time to think about things properly. At some point, Jeff returned to the hospital after Jensen telling him what had happened to Brock, and helped him go through everything for which Jensen is thankful.

It’s almost morning when a nurse calls them to the nurse's station, Alan and Donna go as well - Donna having just woken up from a nap after Alan asked the nurse to give her something to help her rest a bit - Alan supporting most of his wife’s weight. The nurse hands Jensen, who is the closest, two plastic bags.

“These are their belongings.”

Their?

Jensen takes a look through one of the plastic bags at the contents inside it, and finds a driver’s license that belongs to a man who is definitely not his brother. He takes a closer look to read the name. _Jared Tristan Padalecki_.

Jensen frowns at the nurse. “Who is this?”

“This is the man who was with Mr. Ackles in the car.”

What?

Jensen looks at his parents. “Did you know Brock was bringing someone?”

Donna nods weakly. “Yes, h--he told me he was bringing a friend.” She looks at the nurse. “Did this man also… did he…”

The nurse shakes her head. “Mr. Padalecki has survived, he’s been admitted to the hospital. The doctors are saying it is a miracle that the baby also survived.”

Four pairs of eyes widen as everyone looks at the nurse.

“What baby?” Alan asks.

“Mr. Padalecki is pregnant, he is a carrier.”

Pregnant?

From the corner of his eye Jensen can see Donna bringing her hands to her mouth. “Oh my God! This must be Brock’s boyfriend! Oh my God Alan, he’s pregnant! Brock is gone but he hasn’t left us completely. We are gonna have a grandchild. It’s a miracle, thank you God!”

Jensen’s mind is buzzing, Brock was bringing home his pregnant boyfriend and didn’t tell anyone anything about it? Perhaps he wanted it to be a surprise? Well, that is definitely a shocking turn of events.

Donna asks the nurse to please go see Mr. Padalecki, and apparently the woman takes pity on her, because she leads Donna down a hall. Jeff turns to Jensen. “Well, at least there’s that. I’m sure this baby is what’s gonna help your mother to get over the loss of her son. It’s indeed a small miracle.”

Jensen can’t deny that.

He sends Jeff home to get some rest since there’s a lot to be done at the agency and Jensen himself is not gonna be able to be there for the next couple of days at least. Then Alan leaves to go check on Donna and the Jared dude, and Jensen’s phone rings.

It’s an unknown number, with the area code from San Antonio. Hm.

“Hello?”

_“Hello, is this Jensen Ackles?”_

Jensen frowns. “Yes, this is him.”

_“Hello Jensen, I’m sorry to bother you. My name is Chad and you’re my last resource. I’ve been trying to contact Brock and Jared since last night, they were supposed to let me know when they arrived in Dallas but I haven’t heard from them and both phones are turned off. I found your number among Brock’s things, and I had to call you. Are they in Dallas? Is everything okay?”_

Jensen licks his bottom lip, deciding how to tell this guy what happened. But first, he needs to know…

“Chad right? Are you a friend of Brock and Jared?”

The urgent tone in the guy’s voice gets stronger._ “I’m a friend of Jared’s, and Brock’s boyfriend.”_

Jensen’s eyes instantly turn as wide as saucers. Holy. Shit.

“_You_ are Brock’s boyfriend? You serious?”

_“Yes! Please tell me, are they okay?”_

Jensen finds a nearby chair to sit down. He’s about to break a guy’s heart in the worse way possible, feeling confused as fuck himself.

“No Chad, they’re not.”

*

Jensen is drained by the time Alan and Donna return from Jared’s room.

“How is the guy?” Jensen asks, getting up from the chair he’s been sitting on ever since he talked to Chad.

Donna smiles weakly. “Still sleeping, the doctor says he will be fine, the baby is fine too. It’s truly a miracle Jensen, it’s a piece of Brock that stayed with us. I feel like this is the only thing keeping me going now, it’s a sparkle of hope. I can’t wait for Jared to wake up, I’m gonna treat him like my own son, gonna take care of him.”

Jensen purses his lips, forcing out a _that’s great_. He can’t tell his mother the truth, not right now. It’s gonna devastate her completely to learn this baby has nothing to do with Brock.

Alan suggests they go home so Donna can get some rest since they’ve been here for a long time. Before leaving she gives the nurse her number, asking her to call when Jared wakes up.

Once Donna is settled in her room for a nap - after another pill to help her - Jensen takes Alan to the living room.

“Dad, there’s something I need to talk to you about.”

Alan frowns and they sit across from each other on the couches. “What is it, Jensen?”

Jensen takes a deep breath. “While you guys where there with that Jared dude, I got a call from a guy called Chad. He’s Brock’s boyfriend.”

Alan’s eyes widen. “What?”

“Turns out Jared isn’t Brock’s boyfriend, and the child he’s expecting isn’t his. Jared is a friend of both Brock and Chad, just as Brock told mom. Apparently Brock was bringing Jared here to try and find him a job and a place to stay since he couldn’t stay in San Antonio anymore. I told Chad what happened to Brock, and he is of course devastated. Said he is gonna take care of some things and try to come up here as soon as possible.”

Alan brings a hand to his mouth. “Goddamn. I didn’t see that one coming.” He looks at Jensen. “We can’t tell that to Donna just yet. You saw how completely devastated she was, and how her spirits lifted when she learned about this child. She’s so fragile already, if we break the news to her that this isn’t Brock’s baby, I’m afraid of what’s going to happen to her, Jensen.”

Jensen frowns. “You’re suggesting we keep up with the lie and pretend this child is really Brock’s?”

Alan nods.

“But dad, you’re forgetting something. What about Jared? It’s his child and there’s clearly another guy who is the actual father. We can’t do that! Plus if this Jared dude has any decency he will never go for this!”

Alan considers everything for a few moments. “Well, apparently something is not right because, from what this Chad said, it seems that Jared was running away from San Antonio to start a new life here. If everything was well he would have stayed in San Antonio with the father of the baby, wouldn’t he?”

Jensen shrugs. “We don’t know.” He is conflicted because his father is right, Donna is gonna be completely devastated if she learns the truth now, and Jensen has to think about his mother’s health first, it can deteriorate a lot because of all of this. So he nods. “Okay, let’s wait for now. Let’s wait and talk to Jared when he wakes up and also Chad when he arrives.”

Alan bites his lip as he thinks about it. “Yeah, fine. But you need to talk to him before he gets to Donna and explain the situation, tell him he can’t say who he really is. Let’s just tell her he was a really close friend of Brock’s.”

Jensen nods, hoping that things won’t go to shit with this huge mess they just created.

*

Jensen, Alan and Donna are back in the hospital the next day, Jensen has just got off the phone with Danneel. His fianceé said she was really sorry for what happened with Brock but said she wouldn’t come to the hospital because she hates hospitals, would rather see Jensen later. Jensen knows that should bother him but it turns out it doesn’t. As he places the phone back in his pocket, a man approaches them.

“Excuse me?”

They all turn, and Jensen notices the guy has a really sad look on his face. “Yes?”

He addresses Jensen. “Are you Jensen? I’m Chad.”

Jensen’s eyes widen and he looks at his mom and then back at Chad. “Oh, hey… Chad. Yes, I’m Jensen and this is Donna and Alan, Brock’s parents.” Jensen shoots his father an alarmed look.

Chad nods and this time talks to Alan and Donna, his eyes welling up. “I’m so sorry for your loss.”

Donna gives Chad a sympathetic smile. “Thank you. Were you a friend of Brock?”

Chad frowns. “I was…”

“Yes mom,” Jensen is quick to cut him off, positioning himself partially between them. “Yeah, Chad was a very close friend of Brock and Jared, we spoke yesterday on the phone and I told him what happened, and Chad just wanted to be here.”

“Oh I see. Thank you so much for coming, Chad. It means a lot to us.”

Chad has a confused look on his face, and Jensen grabs his bicep. “Chad, why don’t I take you to the cafeteria to grab something to eat? You must be starving after your drive. Come on!”

Without waiting for an answer, Jensen directs Chad to the direction of the cafeteria and only stops when they’re out of Donna’s sight. Chad takes a step back and stares at Jensen.

“What the fuck was that? Why didn’t you lemme say I was Brock’s boyfriend?”

Jensen takes a deep breath and pinches the bridge of his nose, sensing a headache forming. “Look, first of all, I’m sorry we all had to meet like this. You were like, my brother-in-law and I didn’t even know your name. And I’m sorry for your loss, I’m sure you were much more of a family to my brother than myself.”

Chad looks down and nods shortly, murmuring a _thank you_. Jensen carries on, to the harder part.

“Chad, there has been a misunderstanding. You see, my mom thinks the baby Jared is expecting is Brock’s child.”

Chad’s head shoots up at that, his eyes widening. “But that’s not true! Brock was _my_ boyfriend, Jared’s child has nothing to do with him!”

“I know that, and my father does too. I mean, we thought the same thing when we found out Jared was pregnant since we never knew the name of Brock’s boyfriend, but after you called yesterday we learned the truth. But the thing is… my mom is in a very fragile state right now, Chad. Perhaps Brock told you she’s going through a hard treatment for cancer.” Chad acquiesces, and Jensen goes on. “Brock’s death almost killed her, he was her darling, favorite son and I know that. I was worried that something was going to happen to her, that she wouldn’t be able to take it. But then we learned about this child. She immediately assumed it was Brock’s baby and it’s like she regained at least a bit of her will to live. She’s hanging on now and I have a feeling it’s only because of this child, I’m sure she would succumb to her pain if she knew the truth.

“Look, I’m sorry, I know it’s hard for you. You lost your boyfriend and you can’t say who you really were to him, but I’m asking you to carry on with this for now as we figure out what to do, at least until Jared wakes up and we can all have a talk and figure out how to tell the truth. I want to make clear I don’t agree with this and if it were for me we would tell her the truth right away, to me this is a huge nonsense but as I said she’s just too fragile and my father thought it was better to keep up with this lie for now. I know it’s a lot to ask, especially in this tough moment, but please do it for Brock. I know he wouldn’t want anything happening to our mother. Please, Chad. Just for now.”

Chad places both hands on his waist and looks down, biting his lip. He considers everything for a few moments and finally looks up at Jensen. “Yeah, okay. Brock always spoke very fondly of Donna, and was always worried about her health. We can keep this up for now.”

Jensen offers him a tight smile. “Thank you, Chad. Appreciate it.”

“Yeah it’s fine. But I need to see Brock now.”

Jensen nods. “I’ll take you.”

*

Once Jensen leaves Chad to say goodbye to Brock, he goes to check on Jared for the first time. Alan has taken Donna to grab something for lunch and Jensen takes the opportunity to go see this mysterious man. He enters the room and finds the doctor inside. Jensen introduces himself and asks the doctor how Jared is doing.

“Well, Mr. Padalecki is doing okay,” the doctor tells Jensen. “But he is gonna need a lot of care when he’s discharged, Mr. Padalecki has suffered a trauma and he is carrying a child, he’s in a delicate state right now. But with the right care, I’m sure he’s gonna be just fine.”

The doctor excuses himself and exits the room, leaving Jensen alone with the unconscious man. Jensen approaches the bed slowly and takes a good look at Jared for the first time. His face is too pale and there’s a patch covering one of his eyebrows, but Jensen can see Jared has nice features, a strong jaw, pointed nose, long chestnut hair that most likely frames his face when he’s not lying down. Jensen can’t see his eyes since they’re obviously closed, and he wonders what color are they since he couldn’t see very well on the tiny driver’s license photo.

Jensen finds himself lost in thoughts as he studies Jared for a long time. There wasn’t any kind of ring among his belongings, and he’s not wearing one either. Jensen asks himself what exactly is the story here, if his father was right and Jared was indeed running away from something - or someone. He can’t help himself feeling curious about the mystery surrounding this Jared Padalecki.

**TO BE CONTINUED...**


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> here's chapter 3 guys! We've had some rough past days, so hopefully I can bring you guys some joy with a brand new chapter! I've been loving writing this, the story has reached 50k already and there's still so much to happen!
> 
> And I appreciate all the love so much! If you can, please spare some time to lemme know what you think of this chapter! 
> 
> (plus, another thank you to my artist Kelly for the lovely headers! <3 )
> 
> kisses

_ ** ** _

_ **Jared** _

Jared feels like waking up from a long and deep sleep, and he can’t quite tell when exactly he fell asleep. He opens his eyes and the first thing he notices is that he’s not on his bed, everything is too white and too uncomfortable somehow. He looks around and sees a familiar face. Chad is looking at him but there’s something wrong. His friend has a somber and sad look on his face, and that’s so not Chad.

“Ch--Chad?” Jared tries to say his friend’s name but his voice comes out too low.

Chad gives him a sad smile. ‘Hey Jare. How are you feeling?”

Jared frowns and thinks for a moment, how _does_ he feel? “Hmm… I don’t know. Sore, I guess. What happened, Chad?”

Chad stares at Jared for a few moments and licks his lips. “Well, Jare… There was hm--there was an accident.”

At the mention of an accident, things rush back to Jared. He left with Brock to go to Dallas, it was raining so much on the road, and then… there was a truck?

“Oh my god.” Jared brings a hand to his mouth and his eyes widen as he remembers, panic washing through his whole body, his eyes welling up as his other hand goes straight to his stomach. “Chad, my baby! How is my baby, oh my god…”

Chad gets up from the chair he had been sitting on, and places a hand on Jared’s arm. “Don’t worry Jare, the baby is alright. Doctors said it was a miracle.”

Jared closes his eyes as a couple of tears fall, letting out a deep breath, relief washing over him that his child is okay. “Oh, thank God.” He opens his eyes again and stares at Chad. “What about Brock? How is he? Is he here too?”

Suddenly Chad’s whole face changes, composure breaking as his eyes fill with tears and he purses his lips. “Jare, Brock he… he didn’t…”

An invisible hand crushes Jared’s heart as he gets it. No. Just _no_. Not Brock, please. This can’t be happening. More tears pool in his eyes as he looks at Chad, a deep sorrow taking over him.

“No… not my friend, oh Chad…”

Chad doesn’t answer, he only nods with pursed lips as tears fall down his face. Jared suddenly knows his loss can’t even come close to how Chad must be feeling. He extends a hand to his friend. “I’m so sorry, Chad.”

Chad takes the offered hand and leans down, wrapping Jared in a tight hug as best as their positions allow. Even though Jared is in pain, he allows his friend to sob on his shoulder, offering him as much comfort as he can.

Jared’s heart hurts knowing nothing will ever be the same again, and that is not fair.

Once they’ve both calmed down, Chad sits back on the chair next to Jared’s bed and wipes his face before addressing him.

“Look Jare… now about your baby. I know you won’t like what I’m gonna say, but I really think Justin needs to know about that.”

Jared’s eyes widen in shock and he lifts his head from the pillow. “What? Are you crazy, Chad? Justin can never know about my baby, ever!”

Chad purses his lips. “But Jared, Justin could take care of you and your baby. Look, he came looking for me after you guys left. He regrets what he did to you, he said he wants another chance, I felt that he really cares about you and he’s sorry, if only…”

“No!” Jared cuts him off, his heartbeat speeding up. “He’s lying Chad, he can’t ever know! Please Chad, don’t believe him!”

Chad places a hand on Jared’s arm. “Okay Jare, calm down. You need to rest because of the baby. Sorry I brought this up.”

Jared takes a few deep breaths and changes the subject. “When is… when is the funeral?”

Chad shrugs, looking down. “In a couple of days.”

“I wish I could be there. But I don’t know if the doctors will release me until then.”

“No, they probably won’t. But Brock knows you will be there in spirit.”

Jared gives his friend a sad smile. “At least his boyfriend will be there.”

Chad hesitates and gives him a strange look and if Jared weren’t so tired, he would be more worried about it.

*

Jared wakes up sometime later and he’s by himself in the room. He takes some time to think about what the hell he is going to do now. He was coming to Dallas to stay at Brock’s house and maybe try to score a job at his father’s modeling agency. It was literally his only plan. But now Brock is gone, his family is of course in mourning and there is no way Jared can impose something like this to them, he can’t stay in their house in this delicate time let alone ask for a job.

He also can’t go back to San Antonio, he can’t risk running into Justin and having his ex-boyfriend finding out the truth about the baby. Jared is gonna have to figure something out, where to go when he’s discharged. He has some minor savings, but it’s not near enough. Jared knows he’s gonna have to be strong and come up with something because he’s not alone anymore, he has someone else to think about. And the fact that his tiny baby survived this horrible crash makes Jared even more sure that he’s meant to have him, or her. And he will fight tooth and nail to protect and keep his child with him.

The doctor shows up eventually to check on him, he tells Jared once more that it’s a miracle that his baby survived without a scratch. He also tells Jared he will be kept in the hospital for a few days as he recovers and will need some care once he leaves especially because of his pregnancy. Jared is nervous hearing that, having no idea where he is going to go once he is discharged.

Jared dozes on and off a few times and some nurses check on him during the day. At some point a man wearing a suit enters the room, and Jared doesn’t think he is a doctor.

“Hello Jared,” the man starts. “I’m glad to see you’re awake.”

Jared frowns. “Who are you?”

“I’m Alan. Brock’s father.”

Jared recognizes the name, having heard Brock talking about his father on a few occasions. He offers the man a sympathetic smile.

“I’m so sorry about your son, Mr. Ackles.”

Alan gives him a tight smile. “Thank you, Jared.” He slowly approaches the bed a bit more, looking quite nervous, and Jared wonders what is up.

“Look, Jared… there’s an important subject I’d like to talk to you about.”

Jared frowns. They literally just met, what would Alan possibly have to say to Jared? “Okay…”

Alan studies Jared for a few moments with pursed lips. “You see Jared the thing is… I’ll go straight to the point. My wife thinks this baby you’re expecting is Brock’s child.”

“_What_?” Jared’s shock is so huge at hearing that, half of his body shoots up from the bed and he instantly feels the pain, lying down again but still staring at Alan with widened eyes. “This child isn’t Brock’s! I was not his boyfriend, Chad was!”

Alan nods. “I know Jared, I know everything. We actually came to the same conclusion when the nurse told us you were pregnant, but then Chad showed up and we learned who Brock’s boyfriend was, since my son never told us his name. As you probably know, we weren’t on the best speaking terms.”

“I know that. But what I don’t get is why your wife thinks this baby is Brock’s? Hasn’t Chad told you guys who he was and cleared up the confusion?”

Alan shakes his head. “No, he only told Jensen, my other son, and Jensen told me.” Alan sits down on the chair next to the bed and leans forward. “You see Jared, my wife is going through a hard treatment to fight breast cancer, she had surgery not too long ago and is receiving chemotherapy, leaving her on a very fragile state. We just lost a son, and it almost killed her. Finding out about this child, believing it is Brock’s child, gave her a reason to keep going. That’s why I want to propose something to you. I want for you to confirm you really were Brock’s boyfriend and that the child you’re expecting is his.”

Jared just stares at Alan, not believing what he is hearing. He wants him to…

“Mr. Ackles, are you insane? I can’t do that, Brock is _not _the father of my baby, I can’t lie about something like this!”

Alan’s eyebrows shoot up. “And who_ is_ the father?”

“Sorry but that’s none of your business.”

“So this child doesn’t have another father?”

Jared shakes his head. “No. This baby is only mine, nobody else’s!”

Alan lets out a breath and stares at Jared for a few moments. “Jared, what I am offering you is really good, actually. You have nobody and you’re pregnant. I have money, I can take care of you and your baby, you can come live with us at our house and have all the comforts there.”

Jared swallows hard, this is everything he needs but he_ cannot_ accept something like this. “I’m sorry Mr. Ackles, it’s not about the money. I just can’t, can’t lie to your wife about something as huge as this! It’s not fair, this is not who I am!” Jared’s eyes well up as he says those words, he can’t believe he’s even hearing that.

“I’m very glad to hear you have morals.” Alan sighs and crosses his fingers between his knees. “Look, I would never offer something like this under normal circumstances, especially to someone I just met. But this is a matter of life or death. I just told you my wife is incredibly fragile because of her illness, and I’m afraid something will happen to her. This child is the only thing keeping her going, I’m afraid she’s gonna give up if she learns the truth. I just lost a son Jared, I can’t lose my wife too. I’m willing to do anything to keep her safe. And right now, what’s doing it is this baby she believes is her grandchild. Please, Jared.”

Jared feels a deep anguish taking over him. “But that won’t be fair to her, Mr. Ackles. I would be lying to your wife, saying my baby has her blood, it’s the only thing left from her own son when it’s not true! I could never do that!”

Alan studies Jared and nods slowly, getting up from the chair. “Look Jared, you still have a few days left here in the hospital. You don’t need to answer right now, just use them to think about it. As I said, I can help you and your child, I can offer both of you everything you need. Think about it.”

With that Alan leaves and Jared breaks down. When did everything become such a mess? Just the other day he was having a simple life next to the man he thought was “the one”, and now he’s pregnant, Justin is not who he says he is, his best friend is dead and his family wants Jared to lie about who is the father of his baby.

What is he supposed to do?

*

A couple hours later, Jared has just finished picking at his dinner when the door opens and a woman walks in.

“Can I come in?”

Jared has seen pictures of her already, so he knows who she is and he braces himself, nodding that she can come inside. She positions herself at the foot of the bed.

“Hello, Jared. I am Brock’s mother.”

Jared gives her a small smile. “I know, Mrs. Ackles.”

The woman tentatively smiles back and walks around the bed to be on Jared’s side. “I am so glad you are okay, Jared. And please, call me Donna.” She places a hand on top of Jared’s on the bed and caresses it with her thumb. “I’ve prayed so much for you and for your child. This baby is a true miracle.”

Jared stares at the woman, and he can’t do this. “Listen Donna, there is something I have to talk to you about…”

“Easy, easy.” Donna doesn’t let Jared finish as she reaches up and places her other hand on Jared’s shoulder. “You’re still too weak, son. We are gonna have all the time in the world to talk. Especially now that you’re carrying a part of Brock inside you.”

She removes her hand from Jared’s and gently places it on his stomach, smiling at it, making Jared instantly emotional as he lets out a whisper. “Donna…”

Donna goes away just so she can place her purse on the couch, and returns to her original position at the foot of the bed, holding onto the frame and staring at Jared with wet eyes.

“Jared, I almost died with what happened to my son, there is no greater pain in this world. And I can only imagine how much you are also suffering.”

Jared tries again. “Look…”

“But look, from this day on, we have each other. You are my son now. I am going to take care of you. And I am gonna provide everything you and this baby need. Your baby’s father is gone, but you won’t be alone Jared, I promise you.”

Hearing those words, it’s like something breaks inside of Jared and his eyes well up. He can’t help his next words as they come out in a wounded tone.

“I’ve never felt so alone in my life.”

Donna approaches him again and takes his hand. “And that’s why we need each other, you see. I know you don’t have anyone in the world, please let me take care of you, Jared. Taking care of you and your child is the only thing that will give meaning to my life from now on.”

More tears fall down Jared’s face. “But Donna, I really need to tell you…”

“God knows what He does. Despite everything that happened, I am truly happy to be able to give you shelter. There’s a reason why God brought you to our life, I am sure of that.” They just stare at each other for a moment, Jared unable to say anything. “I will be back tomorrow. You get some rest, okay, son?”

Jared just nods, a lump on his throat. His gaze follows Donna as she leaves the room with an emotional smile on her face.

After actually meeting Brock’s mother, everything got so much harder. She just offered Jared everything he desperately needs right now, but how can Jared lie to this mourning woman? He would never forgive himself if he accepted something like that, and he feels truly lost.

*

“You did _what_?” Jared stares at Chad as his friend visits him the next morning, not believing what he just heard.

“I called Justin,” he looks at Jared with a raised eyebrow, a challenging look on his face. “I told you he needs to know about this, Jared.”

Jared shakes his head, this can’t be real. “This is not up to you to decide Chad! I told you I do not want him to know!”

“Well, and he doesn’t. I couldn’t even reach him, I talked to his dad and he told me Justin moved to France for a year to study whatever.”

At that, Jared feels sad. “Well, for someone who told me he loved me and then told you he was sorry and wanted another chance, he forgot about me fairly quickly. I bet he’s there meeting a lot of new people, having fun… he probably doesn’t even remember I exist.” He looks at Chad and feels his eyes blurring all over again with tears. “I don’t know what to do with my life, Chad. I don’t know anyone here in Dallas, and I can’t go back to San Antonio, his powerful family is still there, they might still find me. And Justin could come back at any moment.”

Chad studies Jared for a few moments with pursed lips. “This thing about Donna believing Brock is the father of your baby, and her husband asking you to go with it… what if you confirmed?”

Jared frowns at his friend, not believing what he’s hearing. Has everybody lost their minds? “No Chad! I can’t do that, I can’t keep lying to her!”

Chad huffs. “Jared, do that for Brock, then. I am a witness of Donna’s pain, how fragile her health is. She won’t be able to make it if you take this last hope away from her.”

“How can I give her hope by telling her a lie? Especially such a serious and huge lie like this one? I can’t believe you’re asking this of me, Chad!”

Chad approaches the bed, an experated look on his face. “Jared, when she gets better we can tell her the truth.”

Jared sighs. “Do you have any idea what you’re asking me to do?”

Chad raises an eyebrow. “Do you have any idea how much Brock’s family can protect and help you?”

Before Jared can reply, there’s a knock on the door and Alan and Donna walk in.

“Good morning Jared, hello Chad,” Donna greets both men. “Why do you look upset Jared? You can’t be like that, it’s not good for the baby.” She looks at her husband. “Do you think it’s going to be a boy or a girl?”

Alan gives her a nervous smile as he obviously picks up the tension in the room. “It doesn’t matter, does it?”

Donna smiles. “That’s true. Let’s pray that our baby is very healthy instead.”

At that, Jared makes up his mind and sits up straighter on the bed. “Donna, I’m glad you are here, I do need to talk to you about my baby.”

Alan tries to pull Donna to the direction of the door. “Donna, we should go. Jared needs to rest.”

But Donna waves him off. “No, Jared just said he needs to talk to us about the baby. What happened Jared?” She approaches the bed and gives him an encouraging smile.

Jared swallows hard. “There’s something my grandma, who is the person who raised me, used to always teach me, is that no matter how deep our pain is, the best way to deal with it is to face it fully. I know how much you must be suffering right now. It must be so hard for you to face this tragedy, but there’s something you need to know. It may be hard for you to understand at first, but the truth is that… my child…”

Before Jared can continue, Donna loses her balance and brings a hand to her face. Alan and Chad are by her side in an instant, her husband bearing her weight.

“What happened, honey?”

“I don’t know,” Donna whispers with a frown. I got dizzy all of a sudden, I am not feeling well.”

She looks like she’s about to faint and Alan carries her to the couch as Chad runs to get a doctor, Jared’s heart beat speeds up watching it, just the mention of something happening to her baby caused this reaction to Donna. How will he tell her the whole truth, what is gonna happen to her if he does?

*

Jared is alone for a while, anxious to know what is happening to Donna. Eventually Chad comes back to him room, a worried look on his face.

“How is she doing Chad?”

Chad shrugs. “Okay. They’ve started an IV to give her some fluids, she’s resting.”

Jared smiles relieved. “Good. I know I’ve just met her, but I feel attached to Donna already.”

“Jare, you know that the only thing keeping her going right now is this baby, right? I overheard the doctor talking to Mr. Ackles and his son, they need to get her attached to the baby so she can overcome Brock’s death and not have any setbacks on her treatment. If you tell her the truth now, she might as well die.”

Jared huffs. “What choice do I have, Chad? Huh? Tell her my child is Brock’s? Is that what I should do?”

Chad walks in circles close to the bed. “Jare, let’s call this a charity lie. Don’t you think anything is valid to save her life?”

“What about when she is healed? Am I gonna keep this lie forever?”

Chad rolls his eyes and grabs the bed frame at Jared’s feet. “Who can predict the future, Jared? I mean, up until two weeks ago you were in San Antonio, dating Justin who you thought was broke, you worked at the diner and everything was going smoothly. Now you are here, everything you took for granted became a lie and your life turned upside down.”

Hearing Chad say that, a wave of desperation takes over Jared, and his eyes well up. “I’m so afraid, Chad. I’m afraid Justin’s family finds out I’m pregnant and that his father comes after me, I’m afraid he’s gonna take my baby away from me, and I can’t do anything, I have no money, I have nothing, how am I going to face them?”

Chad lets out a breath and gives Jared a meaningful look. “Jare, Brock’s family is also powerful. If you are under their protection, raising a child that for all effects, has their blood, Justin’s father won’t even come close to you.”

Jared looks at Chad with pleading eyes. “You think so?”

Chad just huffs his confirmation like it’s obvious, but Jared is still uncertain.

“Okay, but what if Donna hates me when she learns the truth? What if she contacts Justin’s family as revenge and gives my baby to them?”

“Look, even if Donna eventually learns the truth, I am positive she’s gonna be eternally grateful to you, Jare. And she will keep protecting you and your baby, she will be grateful that you gave her a reason to go on when she needed the most. Think about it Jare. You really need them, you don’t know anyone else here, and you have nowhere to go in the city, I know you won’t go back to San An. You need them but they also need you. You save Donna’s life and in return they protect you and your baby. Think about it.”

Jared studies Chad for a long time. “Are_ you_ okay with me pretending I’m pregnant with your boyfriend’s child, Chad?”

Chad shrugs, giving Jared a sad smile. “Brock isn’t here anymore and I know it’s not true. I think he would be thankful for this chance of helping his mother after this tragedy. It’s okay, Jare.”

Jared takes a deep breath and thinks about everything for a while. He has to admit it, Chad is right. This is pretty much his only option right now, it’s either that, or go live on the streets while carrying a baby, or risking going back to San Antonio for Justin’s family to find him and take his baby. Jared hates having to lie like this, he was not raised like that, but he knows what he has to do, for himself and for that poor woman. He would never forgive himself if something really serious happened to Donna if he told the truth now.

Jared looks at Chad. “Go call Mr. Ackles, please. I’ve made my decision.”

*

Chad returns to the room a few minutes later with Mr. Ackles and another man. As Jared looks at him, he has a pretty good guess who that person is. His features are very similar to Brock’s, albeit his posture and expression are completely different. Brock was always so open, and Jensen - Jared is sure this has to be Brock’s brother - is all closed off. Just as Brock used to describe him.

Both of them stop by the end of the bed, and Alan motions to the other man.

“Jared, this is Jensen, my other son.”

Jensen is staring at Jared intensely, something on his expression that Jared can’t read. He only gives Jared a short nod, keeping his arms crossed in front of him in a defensive posture.

Jared decides to address Alan instead. “Mr. Ackles, I called you here to let you know I decided to accept your offer. I am going to confirm to Donna that this child is Brock’s.”

To Jared’s surprise Jensen reacts first, taking a step forward, a shocked look on his face. “_What_?”

Jensen’s deep voice sends a chill running up his spine, and he immediate feels wary of the man. Alan puts a hand on Jensen’s shoulder and gently pushes him back, looking at Jared.

“That’s good Jared, I really appreciate it. As promised, I’ll protect you and your child, gonna give you both a comfortable life.”

Jared nods. “But I want to make it very clear that I am doing this for Donna, it’s not about the money.”

Next to Alan, Jensen huffs, turning to his side and whispering loud enough for everyone in the room to hear. “Nice act.”

Jared frowns, wondering what is wrong with this Jensen, but keeps talking and looks back at Alan. “Brock was a huge friend of mine, he really helped me when I needed him. I feel like in a certain way, I owe this to him. But look, when Donna gets better we are gonna have to tell her the whole truth. I was not Brock’s boyfriend, Chad here was, and Brock would like for her to know that, know who the guy her son really loved is. And also know the truth about this baby.”

Alan places both hands in front of him in a placating gesture. “Okay, fine. When Donna gets better we tell her the truth. And I’m making a commitment to you here, no matter the circumstances, I will support you and your child forever.”

Jared nods, his heart feeling tight. “Thank you, Mr. Ackles.”

Both men leave the room soon after, Jensen giving Jared a long stare with narrowed lids and Jared can’t help but feel worried.

_ **Jensen** _

As soon as the door to Jared’s room is closed after them, Jensen explodes as they walk to the exit.

“I can’t believe that dude agreed to this! I can’t believe you are allowing this, dad!”

Alan just looks at Jensen. “I’m not _allowing_ this Jensen, I asked Jared, _begged_ him actually, to do this for us, and you know this was my plan ever since we found out this baby wasn’t Brock’s.”

“Yes, but I actually assumed this Jared would have some decency and decline that offer like any decent person would do. I never for a second thought he would actually agree to this insanity. He’s worse than I thought.”

Alan stops and puts a hand on Jensen’s chest to make him stop as well. “Hey, come on now son. Jared is doing this for Donna, he was a good friend of Brock’s. He’s helping us so your mother doesn’t succumb completely.”

Jensen shakes his head, completely unconvinced. Yes, he is glad that there’s something helping his mother hold it together but this is insane. He was okay with keeping up the lie for a few days until things settled down, but keep up with this lie indefinitely? When Alan told Jensen what he had asked from Jared, he was ready to admit his dad to a psychiatric yard, this was too insane. He always assumed Jared would be a decent human being and say no to this craziness, but surprise surprise, the guy knows how to take advantage of the situation. And his “I-am-not-doing-this-for-the-money” act was so good, Jensen almost believed him. _Almost_. If his father wants to go with this circus fine, but Jensen wants nothing to do with any of this, especially with Jared.

“Fine dad, do as you wish. But don’t expect me to play happy brother-in-law and happy uncle, I don’t want to be a part of this freak show, thanks. I’ll go to the agency because I have things to do.”

With that Jensen storms off to his car, pissed off with this entire insane situation his family landed itself into.

Jensen barely pays attention to the traffic as he drives, everything going in circles in his mind. He arrives at the agency and doesn’t talk to anyone as he quickly walks to his office. Walking inside, he finds Jeff there - they share a big office - and his partner looks up as he hears Jensen.

“What’s up with you?”

Jensen drops down on his chair, rubbing his face with a hand. “Tired.”

Jeff walks behind Jensen and massages his shoulders. “Whoa, you are so tense.”

Jensen huffs. “What did you expected? First, my mother’s illness, and now my brother died. I am sorry I’m not jumping around with happiness right now.”

Jeff leans down and plants a kiss to Jensen’s temple. “Sorry, babe. But I thought you and Brock weren’t too close. I mean, at first I thought you were an only child, you barely mentioned him at all.”

Jensen purses his lips and gets up, feeling an urge to move around. “We were close when we were kids, alright? It’s just that we grew apart when we got older. And then he moved to San Antonio. But it’s not my fault he moved away, alright?”

Jeff places both hands in front of him in a placating gesture, his eyes widening. “Hey, I never said it was! But I think it’s a good thing this Jared is pregnant, at least you guys will have Brock’s kid to make his absence a little bit more bearable.”

Jensen takes a couple of deep breaths so he refrains himself from spilling everything to Jeff. He wants to, he feels the urge to talk to someone, let it all out, but he knows it’s better not to. If word got out and something happened to his mother, Jensen would never forgive himself.

“Look Jeff, I don’t want to talk about Brock, or this baby, or Jared okay.” He lets out the part he wants nothing to do with the last two, that would probably bring up questions and Jensen is just _not_ in the mood.

Jeff nods and comes closer to Jensen, wrapping his arms around him from the side. “Fine, fine. I won’t ask anything else. Now, I really think you should take your fianceé out to dinner. With all that has been happening, I’m sure you haven’t had any time with her.”

Jensen rolls his eyes. “It’s not my fault Danneel hates hospitals, and only showed for my brother’s funeral when everything was pretty much over and everyone was already gathered at my place. I have had some busy days lately, you know?”

Jeff squeezes Jensen closer. “I know. But I really think you should go see her. After all, you are a great fiance, aren’t you?”

“You’re ridiculous. I thought you would want for us to spend the night at your place, watch a movie and just… relax.”

Jeff grabs Jensen’s jaw and plants a kiss on his mouth. “Oh I do, darling. But we can do that later. Call Danneel and go spend some quality time with your girl. Then you can drop her off and come by my place. I’ll be waiting with a nice wine just as you like.”

Jensen agrees, letting out a breath. He can do this. This is what he knows, what he’s used to. It’s his normal and he needs to go back to it. He won’t let this fucked up situation get under his skin. He just needs to try and ignore Jared when he comes to live with them and carry on with his life as he always did.

Piece of cake, right?

**TO BE CONTINUED...**


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey guys, I want to thank you all again for reading my story and for the amazing comments, I appreciate each one of them! I've been doing a good job with this story, just finished working on Chapter 10 and lemme tell you, there's still a LOT to happen after that! So I hope you guys are ready for a long story with some good slow burn!
> 
> And after this chapter I would like to hear your thoughts on Jensen! hehehehehe <3

_**Jared** _

A few days later, Jared is finally discharged from the hospital under strict instructions to take it easy for now. He is feeling anxious and nervous, not knowing what to expect. Chad had to go back to San Antonio a couple of days ago and it was heartbreaking to watch his friend leaving. Jared had hugged Chad tight as he came to Jared’s room to say goodbye.

“Why don’t you come live in Dallas too, Chad? You can find a good job anywhere here, it would be much better if you came.” Chad’s family didn’t live in San Antonio and Chad wasn’t very close to them, so it’s not like he would be leaving them behind. And Chad was a hair stylist, he could find a job at some place in Dallas. But his friend gave him a sad smile.

“Nah, it’s better if I go back to San An. You know it’s for the best too, Jare.”

Jared pouted, but nodded. “Yeah, okay. But I’m gonna miss you.”

Chad squeezed Jared’s shoulder affectionately. “Me too. But we will always be in touch and I’ll be here when my nephew or niece is born.”

Jared had nodded, glad he could always count on his friend. At that moment, Donna and Alan had arrived in the room, Donna hugging Chad goodbye as well, saying it had been very nice to meet him and that he was welcomed to visit any time he wanted. Jared secretly hoped that someday she would know who exactly Chad was, and what he meant to her son.

And now he is all ready to go, he’s finally out of the hospital gown and in his own clothes. Thankfully his stuff wasn’t damaged in the crash, and his bags were brought to him at the hospital after they were retrieved from the totaled car. One less thing for him to worry about. Jared closes his eyes and takes a deep breath, trying to calm his nerves to face what’s coming. He places a hand on his stomach and looks down, rubbing it gently.

“We are going to our new home now, peanut. Let’s hope everyone is nice to us there, right? I’m sorry I have to do this, but I need to protect us, I can’t risk anybody taking you away from me. And also for Donna, you are gonna like her, I’m sure. We’ve been through a lot already and you’re still so tiny, but I already know you’re strong. Thank you for hanging in there for me. We will be okay, peanut.”

*

The drive to the Ackles house is quiet, Jared rides in the backseat with Alan driving and Donna next to him. He looks outside the whole time, getting to know Dallas for the first time since it’s gonna be his new home. When they finally arrive, Alan parks in the driveway and Jared slowly gets out of the car. They’re in an obviously fancy neighborhood, he could see it as they approached the house. And looking up at the Ackles’ residence, Jared can see it’s probably one of the fanciest. It’s huge, with a thousand windows, perfectly manicured lawn, the typical white picket fence probably hiding an equally huge backyard. Jared feels intimidated just looking at it, immediately feeling like he doesn’t belong. It’s strange, but he suddenly misses his old crappy apartment in San Antonio where things were so much easier.

“Come on Jared, let’s get inside,” Donna ushers him. “I’ll have someone bring your stuff to your room.”

Jared nods and timidly walks to the front door as Alan unlocks it. Jared steps inside and takes everything in, how everything is so beautiful and the rooms are so big. He crosses his arms protectively in front of him as Donna quickly shows him around downstairs, then leads him up the stairs and directs him to a door down the hall.

“This is your room, Jared.” She opens the door to reveal it, and holy shit, it’s _huge_. There’s a king size bed in the middle of it, an en suite bathroom, a large closet and a dresser. There are big windows on one side, with a view to the backyard. This room alone is probably bigger than Jared’s entire apartment.

Donna looks at him expectantly. “I hope you like it, Jared. There’s a room right next to this one where I thought we could set up the nursery for the baby, and there’s a door connecting both rooms so you can easily reach it.”

Jared smiles at Donna, wanting to show he appreciates it. “It’s perfect, Donna. You’re so kind. Thank you for everything.”

Donna smiles and pulls Jared down for a hug, which Jared shyly reciprocates. “You’re welcome son. I just want you to feel at home. I see your belongings are already here, I’m gonna leave you alone for now so you can get settled, take a shower if you want, get some rest. I’ll call you later when it’s time for dinner. Anything you need, just call. We have some people that work here for us, they can also help you with everything, okay?”

Jared thanks Donna again but he doesn’t plan on calling any of their employees, not wishing to bother anyone. So Jared takes some time to take a good shower to wash the hospital smell off him. Then he puts his mere belongings away, not taking even a quarter of the closet and just one drawer in the dresser. He places the few pictures he has in the drawer of his nightstand. Then Jared lies down to get some rest like the doctor recommended, and grabs his phone - Donna insisted on giving him a new one after his old phone got smashed in the accident - to call Chad.

Hearing his friend’s voice manages to calm Jared’s nerves a bit, and they chat a bit about how everything is. Eventually Jared asks how Chad is really coping with everything, and his friend is quiet for a few moments. Then, Jared can hear a sniff and Chad’s broken voice.

_“It’s unbearable here, Jare. Everything in this house reminds me of Brock, everywhere I look there’s something of him. Everytime I hear a noise outside, I think it’s him. It’s just awful.”_

Jared’s heart breaks a bit more for his friend. Everything became a huge mess in Jared’s life since the accident and it’s easy to forget Chad lost his loved one in all of this. He wishes he could hug his friend right now.

“I’ve told you, Chad. Come to Dallas, you have nothing left in San Antonio. You can start over here, get a job. Please think about it. Plus we would have each other closer. I could really use a friend here. And you could use a friend too.”

Chad sighs._ “I’ll think about it, I promise. How are things with Brock’s family?”_

Jared shrugs even if his friend can’t see him. “Okay, I guess. I just got here, it’s hard to tell. Donna is making everything so that I’m comfortable, Alan is not so present as she is but I guess it’s hard for him, knowing the truth. And Jensen… I don’t know really, I haven’t seen him after that day I agreed to the plan. He hasn’t been to my room at the hospital again and wasn’t here when I arrived. I’m guessing the less I see him the better, I didn’t get a good vibe from him when we met.”

_“Yeah, from what Brock used to tell us, he isn’t the greatest person in the world, and I can’t tell because I didn’t spend much time with him either. Just… be careful okay? And if you need anything just call me.”_

“I will. See ya, Chad. And think about what I said.”

_“Will do.”_

_*_

Dinner is a quiet affair, it’s just Jared, Alan and Donna. Jared has no idea where Jensen is and he doesn’t ask, it’s better this way. The food is delicious, and even if Jared doesn’t feel like eating much, he forces as much as he can down because he needs to keep healthy for his baby. Donna had asked him what he liked to eat, what he wished to have in the house so she could send someone to do grocery shopping for him, and also prepare his favorite foods, but Jared just said he wasn’t picky, anything was good for him, and it’s true. He never had much growing up so he learned to eat anything they happened to have.

Once dinner is over, Alan retreats to his office and Donna goes up to her bedroom to get some rest. Jared takes the opportunity to wander around the house. In the living room he walks by the mantle, checking some pictures in there. There’s an old one from the family, Jared can see how younger Brock is in the picture, probably way before he moved away. Another one catches his eye, and Jared picks up the frame to get a closer look. It’s Jensen, also looking a bit younger and this is obviously a professional photoshoot. Jared gets distracted looking at it and startles when a voice speaks from behind him.

“That’s me.”

Jared almost drops the frame but manages to put it back in place, turning to Jensen and trying to give him a nervous smile. “Sorry, didn’t mean to pry. Brock told me you have a modeling agency of your own but not that you were a model yourself. That’s a great picture.”

Jensen places both hands in his pants pocket and looks at Jared with narrowed eyelids. “Nice try. But that won’t work on me, ya know?”

Jared frowns, feeling the same chill running down his spine he felt the first day he met Jensen, and he takes a step back to put more distance between them. “What do you mean?”

Jensen licks his lips. “You can have my mom fooled, you can even have my dad fooled, but not me. I know very well what your deal is Jared. I _know_ you are no good.”

Jared’s heart starts beating faster hearing Jensen’s words, and he feels nervous. He grabs the back of the couch and stands behind it as he looks at Jensen, trying to find his voice. “I--I don’t think I get what you’re saying.”

Jensen’s eyebrows raise, and he enunciates his words to make himself clear. “To me, you’re nothing more than a freeloader. Get it now?”

Jared frowns, feeling his hands sweating as he squeezes the couch. “Why are you saying this to me Jensen? You don’t even know me!”

Jensen huffs. “Because a person with morals would _never _take advantage of my father’s despair and accept the offer he made.”

Jared suddenly feels pissed, who Jensen thinks he is to talk to him like this? He doesn’t even know Jared, he has no idea what is going on with him, he knows absolutely nothing about his life. So Jared rounds the couch and faces Jensen head on, using the tools he has.

“Is that really what you think?” Jensen nods, and Jared goes on. “Then why are you wasting your time with me? Why don’t you go to Donna and tell her the whole truth? Go, she’s in her room resting right now.”

Jensen narrows his eyelids again as he stares at Jared in disbelief. “You’re definitely not kidding around, huh Jared? And you know very well how to bluff.”

Jared walks past Jensen, a sudden desire to end this whole thing washing over him. “Who says I’m bluffing?” He points upstairs. “Go! Tell her right now! Maybe that’s a favor you do to both her and myself!”

Jensen rolls his eyes. “Okay! I admit it, maybe you’re a necessary evil for now, this baby gave my mom a new boost to face things and it didn’t let her succumb to the sadness of losing Brock. But the minute she’s feeling better I’m gonna make sure I’m the one who tells her the truth so you can be on your way.”

Jared stares at Jensen and slowly shakes his head, suddenly feeling pity towards the other man. “You know, when Brock spoke about you, I thought he was exaggerating. But now I see it was not even close to what you really are.”

Jensen frowns, looking uncertain for a moment. “ What did Brock say about me?”

Jared huffs. “Why do you care, Jensen? You think I’m a cheap liar, why would you believe a word I say?”

With that, Jared walks away but Jensen is not done, giving him a final warning.

“Enjoy the good life while you can, Jared. It won’t last long and soon you’ll go back to the hole you came from.”

With that, Jensen leaves the house again and Jared runs up the stairs to his room, closing the door behind him, tears of despair finally running down freely. Why does it have to be like this? What did he do to make Jensen hate him so much? Jared sits on his bed, and cries harder. Is Jensen right? Was Jared crazy for accepting this? If Jared were strong enough, he would go to Donna right now and tell her the whole truth. But what if something happens to her? And when he gets kicked out after telling her the truth, where would he go? Back to San Antonio so Justin’s family could find him?

It’s not like Jared has many choices, and he truly isn’t a bad person for accepting this deal. At least he doesn’t think so. He hopes he isn’t. _Damn Jensen. _Jared will have to make sure to stay out of Jensen’s way as much as possible and try to come out of all of this as unscathered as possible.

Why does everybody think Jared is a liar?

A while later as Jared is ready for bed, his heart still feeling tight for all the things Jensen said to him, Donna shows up in his room. She kneels down by his bed and Jared sits up.

Donna gives him a sympathetic smile. “I came here to check on you, sweetie. I know how scary this whole thing must be to you, this is too new and we’ve only known each other for a short time. Plus, everything that has happened is too recent and raw. But I want you to be sure again that you’re like a son to me, and we will get through everything together okay?”

Jared purses his lips, Jensen’s words resonating in his brain. “I appreciate it Donna, but I’m not sure I deserve all of this care.”

Donna stands up and smiles wider at Jared. “Don’t say that. You brought me the biggest blessing I could ever get. I’m forever thankful to you. Good night, Jared. Sleep well.”

It takes a long time for Jared to fall asleep that night.

*

Jared spends the next couple of days trying to adjust to his new house. It feels weird living in such a big place, with people doing all the chores, even cooking for them. Thankfully he doesn’t see Jensen much, he is out during most of the day like Alan - actually even more. They only had dinner twice together, the whole family, and Jared tried to avoid looking at Jensen as much as possible, pretend he wasn’t there, but he could feel Jensen’s gaze on him, studying him a few times. Jared didn’t feel like eating much both times and asked to be excused from the table with the excuse that he needed to get some rest.

On Saturday evening Jared is in his room talking to Chad on the phone, telling him everything that’s going on including what happened between Jensen and him, when he hears Donna calling him from downstairs. He tells Chad he needs to go and hangs up the phone, going downstairs to see what Donna wants.

Arriving in the living room, Jared finds himself facing Alan, Donna, Jensen and a girl he doesn’t know. Donna smiles at Jared when she sees him.

“Jared, sweetie, I want to introduce you to Jensen’s fianceé, this is Danneel Harris.”

The girl smiles at him and it’s so sweet Jared can’t help but smile back. She is very beautiful, with a delicate face and auburn hair, and a pretty smile.

“It’s nice to meet you, Danneel.” Jared extends a hand and Danneel happily takes it. Jared brings it to his face and kisses it - he can be a gentleman like his grandma taught him - causing Danneel to giggle.

She looks at Jensen. “Oh my god Jensen, you didn’t tell me he was so gorgeous!”

“It didn’t actually come up,” Jensen says, looking at Jared as if wishing he could make him disappear right then and there, but the others don’t notice.

“Jared, Jensen and Danneel came here to tell us they’ve settled on a date for their wedding!” Donna tells Jared, excitement pouring out of her voice.

Jared forces out a smile. “That’s great. Congratulations.”

Danneel grabs his hand and brings him to the couch, making Jared sit down with her. “So you were Brock’s boyfriend, huh? I had never heard about you, sadly! Well in fact, I never met Brock in person, wish I could have had the chance to spend some time with him!”

Jared smiles fondly as he remembers his friend. “Yeah, I wish you could have. Brock was an amazing guy.”

“And now you’re having his baby, that’s so exciting! I can’t wait to be the baby’s auntie! Have you chosen names yet?”

Jared shakes his head. “No, not yet.”

Danneel brushes it off. “Well, you have plenty of time. Also, I want you to know that you’re already invited to our wedding, it’s gonna be in a couple of months and I want my brother-in-law there!” She looks up at Jensen who is still as a statue watching the whole exchange. “Right, honey?”

Jensen doesn’t look at Jared as he answers tightly. “Sure, Danni.”

They eventually move to the dining table for dinner, Danneel talking excitedly with everybody who is willing to listen about the wedding preparations, and Jared is glad that she at least can alleviate the tension between him and Jensen. Jared even finds himself smiling at her a few times, he can feel that, unlike her fiance, she has a good heart.

*

Later Jared is walking by the living room, having come back from the garden where he was reading a book, at the same time as Jensen is saying goodbye to Danneel at the front door with a chaste kiss. As he walks back to the living room, Jared can’t help himself despite the warnings inside him to keep away, sitting on the arm of the couch and looking at Jensen.

“Your fiancee is very cute. She seems like a great girl, very friendly.”

Jensen sits down on the opposite end of the couch and looks at Jared with an eyebrow raised. “I know she seems a bit too much sometimes, but she does have a good heart. Which is hard to find these days.”

Jared makes sure Jensen knows who he is referring to as he scoffs. “Yeah, I just feel sorry that she couldn’t pick someone better to marry.”

Jensen suddenly gets up, an angry look on his face, and Jared gets up as well to face him.

“And who are _you_ to criticize her choice?” Jared only looks at Jensen without answering, and he goes on, cocking his head to one side. “What about the father of your baby? Where is he?”

Jared feels a pang in his heart. “It’s none of your business.”

He walks past Jensen, intending to go up to his room, but the man grabs his elbow and forces Jared to face him again.

“Sure. I bet you don’t even know who the father is.”

Jared’s blood boils and before he realizes what he’s doing, he slaps Jensen in the face, hard.

Before Jensen can react Alan and Donna walk in, and the woman has a horrified expression on her face.

“What is going on? Why did you hit Jensen?”

Jared is too far gone to say anything or to care, this was the last straw for him. He’s too furious and he knows he has to _get the fuck away. _Jared cannot stay in a house where people don’t respect him.

“Ask your son Donna, all I know is that I can’t stay here anymore. It’s too late now, but I’ll be gone by tomorrow morning. I’m sorry.”

With that, Jared runs up the stairs and slams the door to his room, his heart beating a mile a minute. He feels desperate, he has nowhere to go but he just can’t stay and have a battle with Jensen everyday, he can’t live under this tension, afraid about the next disrespectful thing Jensen is going to say to him.

What is he supposed to do?

_ **Jensen** _

Jensen’s face still stings where Jared slapped him and he’s_ furious_. Who does that lying asshole think he is?? Donna turns to Jensen, a shocked expression on her face.

“Jensen what did you say to that boy to cause such a reaction from him?” Jensen just looks at her, rubbing his face, and she goes on. “He is_ pregnant_ Jensen, with your brother’s child, he’s in a fragile state, we need to be careful with him.”

At that, Jensen snaps. “Are we sure of that, mom? Is this child really Brock’s?”

Donna’s mouth hangs open. “Did you dare say this to Jared, Jensen? Are you insane, the doctor told us he needs to take it easy, he’s still recovering! He needs peace and calm, he does_ not_ need you questioning if Brock is the father of his baby or not. Of course he is, they were boyfriends!”

“Were they? How can we be so sure of that? He never told us his boyfriend’s name, what if…”

“Enough!” This time it’s Alan, who had been quietly watching the whole exchange, who speaks, his tone leaving no room for argument. “Jared was Brock’s boyfriend, there’s no doubt about that. And your mother is right, we cannot add more to this man’s stress, he is already going through a lot. Enough, Jensen.”

Jensen looks at both his mother and father and shakes his head. Jared’s spell really worked on them, the guy is good, he has got to give him that. He decides he has had enough for tonight and grabs his wallet, phone and car keys from the end table.

“I’m out of here, everybody has gone insane in this house.”

*

Later, Jensen finds himself in Jeff’s bed, lying next to him after a good and much needed fuck. Jeff is smoking a cigarette as he always does. Jensen doesn’t like it but he’s given up on trying to break Jeff’s habits.

“You know, I love that you came over tonight,” Jeff says after taking a drag, patting Jensen’s thigh. “Wasn’t expecting that, it was a good surprise.”

Jensen sighs. “Needed to get out of the house a bit. Can I stay over tonight?”

Jeff frowns, staring at Jensen. “Why? You know that’s not our deal, Jensen.”

“I know. But I just don’t want to go back home tonight, not in the mood.”

Jeff purses his lips and sets the cigarette on the ashtray, turning towards Jensen. “What is going on, babe?”

Jensen looks at the ceiling and considers everything before answering. He turns around to face Jeff. “I don’t know. I’m uncomfortable, irritated, short tempered lately. Dunno exactly what’s happening.”

Jeff reaches out and rubs a hand over Jensen’s chest. “Maybe what’s happened to your brother and all the tension it brought to your house are catching up to you. You’re under a lot of stress lately, this is normal. You know what, I’m gonna allow for you to spend the night here, just for tonight, though. Just don’t let it become a habit. You know that I enjoy my space too much.”

Jensen rolls his eyes. “Whoa, thanks a lot.” He kind of wants to share with Jeff what is really happening, how that Jared dude is getting under his skin but he knows he can’t, he would have to tell Jeff the reason and it’s just not an option. He chooses to focus on the fact that Jared will be gone sooner rather than later.

_ **Jared** _

It’s morning and Jared has barely gotten any sleep. There were a thousand things going over his mind, the most important being that he cannot stay in this house with Jensen, he won’t be disrespected over and over again by someone who doesn’t know shit about him. Jared spent the night wondering where he could go. He does have a little money saved, it’s not much but he can go to a cheap motel for now, figure out what to do next, maybe get a job at a diner or something.

Jared start packing his things, refusing to cry, he just needs to go soon to avoid running into that asshole again. He hears a noise at the door and turns around to face Alan.

“Jared…” He starts, but Jared cuts him off.

“No, Mr. Ackles. Please don’t ask me to stay, I cannot be in this house anymore! And please don’t mention money, I have some savings, I am gonna figure out what to do, I appreciate what you have done for me but I just can’t…”

“Hey, hey!” Alan interrupts Jared’s rant, his two hands in front of him in a placating gesture. “I didn’t come here to try and talk you out of it. I came here to bring someone who wants to talk to you.”

Jared frowns, wondering who it could possibly be, and suddenly Chad walks through the door. Jared is so on edge at the moment - he will blame it on the pregnancy - that his eyes well up when he sees his friend, running to give him a tight hug.

“Oh my God Chad, I’m so glad you’re here!”

Chad hugs him back tightly for a few moments, and when they break apart Alan tells them he will give them privacy. Jared looks at Chad with a frown on his face.

“Chad what the fuck are you doing here? Not that I’m not glad to see you but you know what I mean.”

Chad raises his eyebrows. “Mr. Ackles called me last night and asked me to come, it was an emergency. And here I am. I want to know what the fuck is this idea to leave this house, Jared.”

Jared sighs, raising his arms to his sides. “I can’t stay here Chad, you have no idea the horrible things Brock’s brother told me! I can’t live under the same roof as someone like that!”

Chad rolls his eyes. “Jare, Brock has always told us how immature, how selfish Jensen was, it’s not exactly news. Have you forgotten what you came here to do, Jare? You came here to help Brock’s mother and also to protect yourself from Justin’s family. If you leave now, you are gonna crush Donna and you’re also gonna be vulnerable. Just try and ignore Jensen, Jared. He’s an asshole, you know that. But he can’t do anything against you right now without hurting his own mother, so he’s gonna have to suck it up and accept you. You need to be strong my friend, it’s gonna be okay.”

Jared thinks about Chad’s words and suddenly deflates, sitting on the bed. “Maybe you’re right. I can’t leave them now. It’s just that Jensen gets under my skin, I wanted to smash his face on the floor yesterday!”

Chad chuckles, his eyes widening. “Whoa, Jare. I have never heard you talking about someone like this, not even Justin. Jensen is really messing with your head, isn’t he?”

“A lot.”

*

Once Jared is calmer, he takes Chad for a walk around the house. In the living room his friend studies the pictures on the mantle with a sad expression on his face, and both sit on the couch.

“It’s so weird to see all those pictures, ya know. Knowing this is where Brock grew up, it’s so different from our small apartment in San An. But at the same time, I can feel his presence here, his touches. It’s like being closer to him, somehow.”

Jared purses his lips and stares at his friend. “Chad, come on, I’ve told you to come live in Dallas. You can find a job here, I don’t want to think about you all alone in San An.”

“Jare…” Chad starts shaking his head, but they’re interrupted by Alan and Donna arriving in the living room.

“Chad darling! I didn’t know you were coming to visit us!” Donna opens her arms to give Chad a warming hug.

“Sorry Donna, it was a last minute thing, just needed to come and put some sense in Jared’s thick head.”

At that, Jared gets up and faces Donna. “Donna, I want to apologize for last night, it was completely out of line.”

Donna smiles at Jared and squeezes his shoulder. “It’s okay, son. You’re more fragile, it’s understandable. So I’m gathering that you’re staying then?”

Jared nods shortly. “Yes, I am.”

“Wonderful!” Donna turns to Chad. “Are you joining us for lunch, sweetie?”

Chad shakes his head. “No I can’t, but thank you. I have to get back to work soon.”

At that, Jared clears his throat. “Actually, Donna I was thinking…” He knows he’s risking too much asking this, but he has to. And asking doesn’t hurt, right? “Do you think maybe Chad could come live with us?”

Three pairs of widened eyes stare at Jared.

“What?” Alan is the first one to speak, followed by Donna.

“Chad, living with us? Why would you ask that, Jared?”

Jared shrugs. “I think it would be good for me to have a friend close by. Also Chad is alone now in San Antonio without me and Brock, we were his best friends. I think it would be good if he came here to live with us.”

Chad grabs Jared’s shoulder and looks pointedly at him. “Jared, are you insane? I can’t come live here, come on!”

But Donna surprises Jared by speaking, clasping her hands together. “You know what? I think it is a great idea! You were so close to my son, I don’t want to think about you all alone in that city. And Jared is right, it will be good for him to have a friend close. Plus, we own a few modeling agencies, you won’t be short of a job that’s for sure! You’re more than welcome to come live with us, Chad. You can stay at Brock’s boat house, it’s fully equipped and my son loved that place, I’m sure he would want his friend to stay there.”

Chad considers everything for a few moments, Jared giving him a pleading look - hey he is using the weapons he has - and finally his friend acquiesces.

“Okay, fine. I’ll come live here.”

Jared wraps his arms around his friend, excited to finally have Chad close again. Donna is smiling at them but Alan has a preoccupied look on his face. Jared chooses not to dwell on it too much for now.

When Chad and Jared are alone in his room, Chad asks if Jared is crazy.

“No, I’m not,” he explains to Chad matter-of-factly. “It’s just that you were Brock’s boyfriend, the guy he loved, and I know he would want you here, you must come live here. I know Brock eventually wanted his family to meet you, and now this is gonna happen. Trust me, Chad. You said yourself that you couldn’t stay in that apartment without Brock anymore, it’s a chance for a new start. Plus we are gonna be together. Trust me.”

Chad sighs. “Yeah okay.”

Jared smiles at him, relieved. At least he has one ally now.

*

Later Jared is walking down the stairs with Chad behind him right when Jensen arrives home. When he spots Jared, he raises an eyebrow.

“What are you doing here? I thought you would be gone by now.”

Jared gives him a smug smile. “I decided to stay.” He makes a motion to Chad behind him. “Actually… _we_ are staying. And as for you… if you’re bothered, it’s your own business.”

Jensen frowns, looking from Jared to Chad. “What the fuck is going on? What is he doing here?”

“I invited Chad to come live here.”

Jensen gasps. “Oh my god, you have to be kidding me.”

At that moment, Donna walks in from the backyard. “The boat house is ready!”

Jensen turns to her, eyes widened. “What? He is staying at the boat house?”

Donna nods. “Yes, he is. I thought your brother would like for his friend to stay there.” She then turns to Chad. “Come on Chad, I’ll take you there.”

Chad says good night to both Jared and Jensen, and leaves with Donna. Jensen turns to Jared with narrowed eyelids, a murderous expression on his face.

“You’re really shameless aren’t you? I mean, it’s not enough that you’re lying about being pregnant with my brother’s child, now you propose that his actual boyfriend comes to live here? So you can both leech off my parents?”

Jared looks up, taking a deep breath. He has decided he won’t let himself be intimidated by Jensen anymore.

“Look, Jensen,” he starts, taking a step forward, closer to the other man. “Honestly, what you think really doesn’t matter to me. I’m here to help the mother of a great friend of mine. I won’t allow you to intimidate me with your opinion anymore.”

Jensen licks his lips and studies Jared for a few moments. “Okay. Let’s consider the very, very, _very_ remote and tiny possibility that you are not here to take advantage of my family’s money…” he cocks his head to the side, tapping a finger to his mouth. “What really brings you to this house, Jared? Tell me, what’s your real reason? Are you running from something? Or someone?”

Jared’s heart starts beating faster in his chest, but he tries to keep his poker face as he looks at Jensen. _Don’t let him get to you_. Suddenly, Jared has an idea. He crosses his arms in front of him and sighs, walking past Jensen and turning to look at him.

“Yes I am.” Jared stares at Jensen’s face, deadly serious. “I’m running away from the police, Jensen. I am extremely dangerous. I rob banks. I’m wanted in over ten states. I’m trusting you with this.” Jared makes gunfigers and blows at them, coming an inch closer to Jensen and whispering. “Don’t tell anybody.”

Jared walks past Jensen again, bumping into him this time, and making his way up the stairs. He turns his face around just enough so Jensen will hear him.

“You’d better hide your money well!”

Jared is not gonna lie, he feels a tad better after playing with Jensen like this. If he thinks he’s gonna give Jared a tough time, he has just met his match.

**TO BE CONTINUED...**


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I want to thank you guys as always for reading my story and also thank you for the lovely comments!
> 
> i'd really love to know your thoughts on the events of this chapter! hope you enjoy it!

_**Jensen** _

Jensen is_ furious_. Who that fucking dude thinks he is to start demanding things in their house now? Jensen is quick to express his discontent to his father once his mother has gone to bed and they’re alone in the living room.

“I mean, Jared just_ imposed_ that Brock’s boyfriend comes live here as well? Isn’t it enough that we have to be stuck with him, now we also have to welcome his friend with opened arms? What have we become? A hostel?”

Alan looks pointedly at him. “I know it’s not easy Jensen, but I had to do it. And if you think about it, it was all your fault.”

Jensen’s jaw drops. “_My_ fault??”

“Yes. If you hadn’t been so hostile towards Jared, pushed him the way you did, he wouldn’t have threatened to leave and I wouldn’t have to call Chad to come here and talk him out of it. I didn’t know Jared would end up inviting the guy to come live here.”

Jensen sighs, rubbing his eyes with his hand, a headache forming. “Dad, can’t you see this guy is taking advantage of us? It’s not possible that I’m the only one who sees it!”

Alan licks his lips as he stares at Jensen, looking suddenly tired. “Look, even if Jared is what you accuse him of being, which we don’t know, he’s being of a great help to your mother. She’s doing much better, she’s feeding herself as she’s supposed to, there has been improvements in her treatment. We can’t deny that Jared is responsible for it, or his baby is. She would have succumbed after Brock’s death if it weren’t for this misunderstanding. We are stuck with Jared for now, son. And Chad too, apparently.”

Jensen decides to go to his bedroom instead of answering.

*

Jensen is feeling calmer the next day, and he decides he needs to run some errands for the wedding. He knows he’s not participating as he should, he can’t bring himself to care enough about it if he’s being honest.

Actually, Jeff is the one who decides for him. He has barely arrived at the agency when his partner asks if he has already bought the wedding rings.

“No I haven’t,” Jensen answers as he sits down behind his desk. “I know I should have already, but there’s just too much going on.”

Jeffs sits down in front of him, placing a hand on his forearm and caressing it with his thumb. “I know. But you know you can’t postpone it any longer, you and your fianceé need beautiful rings for the big day. I’ll tell you what, why don’t we go to lunch at the mall and then stop by the jewelry shop?”

Jensen thinks for a few moments and eventually nods. “Yeah, sounds like a plan.”

Anywhere but _Jared_, he thinks bitterly.

A couple of hours later Jensen and Jeff are sitting across from a smiling woman at the jewelry shop. She shows them some amazing rings, but if Jensen is being honest, it doesn’t make any difference to him. Jeff, on the other hand, is inspecting all of them closely.

Eventually he picks two up, made with a mix of yellow and white gold. It’s simple but beautiful.

“You should get these, Jensen. Your fianceé will love it,” Jeff gives Jensen the rings for a closer inspection.

“Yeah, they look nice,” Jensen gives Jeff and short smile as his lover gets the rings back and hands it to the woman.

“He’s taking these.”

The lady gets the rings and says she will be right back. Jensen turns to Jeff. “So now you’re choosing my wedding ring as well?”

Jeff grabs Jensen’s jaw and plants a kiss to his mouth. “I just know what works best. Plus your fianceé deserves the best, you are perfect for each other.”

Jensen scoffs, Jeff is so full of shit sometimes. “Don’t you want me to put a ring like this on your finger?”

Jeff lets go of Jensen’s jaw and visibly shudders. “Oh hell no! You know I run from commitment like I run from the devil, darling! What we have right now works perfectly fine for me, thank you.”

Jensen raises an eyebrow. “Well, soon I’m gonna be a married man.”

Jeff smirks at him. “Well, if it makes you feel any better, you can take off your ring whenever you come over to my place.”

*

Jensen arrives home in the evening, and finds both his parents in the living room. He decides to show them the rings. He walks over and gives his mom a kiss on her head.

“Hey guys, I want to show you something.” Jensen takes the velvet box from the small paper bag, opening it to reveal the matching rings, and shows them to his parents. “I got our wedding rings!”

Donna lights up at that, clasping her hands together and giving him a smile. “Oh my god Jensen, those are so beautiful!” She takes the box from him for a closer inspection. “Danni is going to love them!”

At that moment Jared walks into the living room coming from the kitchen, he barely spares Jensen a glance as he walks by, probably to go up to his room, but Donna calls him.

“Jared, come here! Let me show you the wedding rings Jensen got for himself and Danneel!”

Jensen groans inwardly as Jared walks towards them, picking up the box from Donna’s hands. Jensen watches Jared as he looks at the rings, his expression slowly changing. Jensen studies Jared. It’s like he’s suddenly in pain, Jensen can see his adam’s apple bobbing up and down as the man swallows hard, his eyes clouding and a deep frown forms on his face.

Jared stares at the rings lost in thoughts for a few moments, and then blinks, shakily hands the box back to Donna, and plasters a smile to his face.

“They’re gorgeous.” Jared then turns to Jensen, his eyes suddenly shinier. “You have good taste, your fianceé will love it.” His voice breaks in the end and Jared quickly excuses himself, pretty much running away from the living room, and Jensen just watches him.

What the hell just happened?

His parents haven’t noticed that Jared was feeling odd, they’re still cooing over the rings. Without thinking Jensen walks after Jared, following him to the den, which is the place where Jared apparently ran off to.

The door is ajar and Jensen peeks inside. He locates Jared lying sideways on the couch, hugging a cushion, his legs drawn almost up to his chest. But what makes Jensen’s heart stop is that Jared is sobbing. He looks so miserable and desperate, Jensen just cannot walk away. He knows he should. The guy is a freeloader, he’s a liar, Jensen shouldn’t spare him a second of his time. But watching Jared suffering so obviously like this, hearing those gut-wrenching sobs, seeing as the man shakes, and having absolutely no idea what suddenly caused it…

Against Jensen’s will his legs carry him to the couch, and he slowly sits down by Jared’s feet, who sits up as Jensen does it. He keeps his body turned away from Jensen, who feels at a loss of what to do or say. He reaches out on pure instinct, to try and touch Jared and offer some comfort, but pulls his hand back before he does it. Not a good idea.

Jensen clears his throat. “Is… is everything okay?”

What a stupid question.

Jared eventually turns to him, his face red and blotchy, wet with tears, and Jensen feels a sudden pang in his heart.

Jared shakes his head, trying to speak as more tears fall down his face. “No. Just… my life. What happened to it? I thought everything would be different, you know? And then this happened and…” Jared places a hand on his face, supporting his arm with an elbow on his knee, and lets out a deep sigh. “Oh God.”

He starts sobbing again and Jensen can’t think rationally anymore. Before he can stop himself, he scoots closer to Jared, reaching out and placing an arm around him, bringing the man closer. Jared comes and lies his head on Jensen’s shoulder, allowing more tears to fall, his whole body shaking. Jensen offers all the comfort he can while having no idea what he’s doing or why he’s doing it. His brain is screaming at him that he shouldn’t do this, but for some reason, in his heart it actually feels _right_. Where he is supposed to be, at least for tonight. So he consoles Jared.

Jensen holds him until Jared’s sobs subdue, and he stops shaking.

“Better?” Jensen asks softly, and apparently that gets Jared out of his trance.

Jared lifts his head and gets away from Jensen, who lets his arm drop on the couch. Jared harshly wipes his remaining tears and gets up from the couch, looking anywhere but Jensen.

“I--sorry, I’ll go. Well, I’m going to my room now. Th--well, good night, Jensen.”

With that, Jared bolts from the den, and Jensen can hear his quick steps as the man goes upstairs.

Seriously, _what the fuck just happened_?

_ **Jared** _

Jared closes the bedroom door behind him and leans against it, not even having the strength to walk to the bed. His body gives out and he slides down until he is sitting on the floor, hugging his knees close to his chest. He’s just feeling devastated, he has been keeping a strong façade but tonight was just too much.

Everything was fine, he was in the kitchen having a small snack and then was making his way to the stairs when Donna called him. Jensen was in the living room with them, Jared was just gonna ignore them all to go to his room but Donna was having none of it. When she showed Jared the wedding rings Jensen had bought, it was like something broke inside Jared.

He was brought back to maybe a little more than a month ago - had it really been that little? Because it sure seems like another life - when everything was still alright in Jared’s life. Or he thought so.

_Jared, at the mall with Justin, when they met there after work since Jared wanted to buy a little something for one of his coworkers’ birthdays, and then had a snack at the food court. As they strolled down one of the hallways, Jared spotted a store and chuckled._

_“What?” Justin asked, looking at Jared with curiosity._

_Jared made a motion towards the store. “It’s that jewelry shop, ‘Jared’. I think it’s funny how it has my name.”_

_Justin looked at it and then at Jared, giving him an amused smile. “Well, maybe it’s a sign.”_

_Justin stopped in front of the shop and checked out the items on display, and Jared took the opportunity to do the same. His eyes were immediately drawn to a wedding ring, white gold with a stripe of yellow gold embedded in the middle. _

_Justin caught Jared studying the ring. “You like it?”_

_Jared couldn’t help but smile, he really did. Such a beautiful ring. “Yeah, it’s just gorgeous, look at it.”_

_Justin placed a hand on Jared’s back, drawing them closer. “Well, maybe I’ll buy a set of those rings for us someday.”_

_Jared couldn’t help himself, he laughed out loud. “That was a funny one! Jus, you would probably need to work for ten years to be able to afford rings like this one.”_

_Justin closed the distance to whisper in Jared’s ear. “Well, love is capable of things you can’t imagine.”_

_It was only later that Jared realized that was the first time Justin mentioned plans of a future for them, and it made him so ridiculously happy._

Jared had been so stupid and naive back then. Justin could afford a hundred rings like those, and he had been playing with Jared. When Donna handed him the velvet box and Jared saw those rings, how similar they were to the ones Jared saw at the jewelry shop the other day, he couldn’t hold it together anymore. Everything came crashing down and when Jared felt he was on the verge of breaking down, he had to flee. His legs carried him to the den and he pretty much threw himself on that couch, unable to hold himself together anymore, tears filling his eyes. His heart ached for everything he had lost, for the perfect little life he thought he had and how it all turned out to be a lie. He had loved Justin so much, he believed him. It didn’t matter that Justin would never be able to put a ring like that on Jared’s finger. All he cared about was that they would be together, that Justin wanted a future for them together and for the first time he had made that clear for Jared. When Jared found out he was pregnant, he had naively believed it would only serve to strengthen their bond, that they would start a family. And now he was in this strange house, he was going to be a single father, Justin was God knows where, and everything fell apart. Jared had never felt so miserable in his entire life.

He couldn’t explain why Jensen ended up there, or why he had comforted him. Even though Jensen couldn’t stand Jared, he had been there, and at that moment it was all that Jared needed, someone to comfort him. Jared let his guard down for a few moments, but sadly he was brought back to the present and realized who was there with him. It was so incredibly awkward, Jared didn’t even know what to say to Jensen, he had to flee.

And here he is now, his heart hurting for everything. Those fucking rings triggered something inside him, some huge sense of loss and despair. He feels so lonely, more than ever. Everything in his life right now is a lie, he doesn’t belong anywhere. He doesn’t belong in this house, he doesn’t belong in San Antonio. Jared just wishes he had a _home_. He wishes he had someone who truly loves him for who he really is, without the lies. Sure, Chad is his loyal friend and the only person in this world Jared knows for sure he can count on, but sometimes Jared wishes for something more. A sense of belonging. A family.

Jared touches his stomach, reminding himself he has a loved one growing there. His baby is gonna be Jared’s family, and he can’t wait to have in his arms someone to love more than anything, someone to give Jared a purpose, a reason to go on. Because right now, he can’t see any.

*

The next day, Jared doesn’t do much, he mostly hangs out in the backyard or his room, sometimes keeping Donna company but mostly he keeps to himself. Chad has gone back to San Antonio to take care of things before he can officially move to Dallas, and will only be back tomorrow. Jared is also not feeling too well, he is feeling a bit nauseated and tired because of the pregnancy. Most days he feels just fine but today is not one of them, so he mostly lies down. Thank God Jensen is working today, Jared is not in the mood to see him, wanting to avoid the inevitable awkwardness. Jensen clearly doesn’t like Jared, he probably had a moment of insanity yesterday, and Jared is sure it’s gone by now. It’s better if they avoid each other.

Jared decides not to go down for dinner with the rest of the family, telling Donna he is not feeling very well - which is the truth anyway - and the woman is worried about him, asking the cook to prepare some soup and take to Jared’s room. He ends up eating almost the whole thing, it’s very good.

Jared wakes up in the middle of the night, his stomach rebelling completely. He runs to his en suite bathroom, losing all the contents in his stomach. Once Jared is done, he washes his face and brushes his teeth, feeling like crap. He decides against lying down again and chooses to go downstairs to the kitchen for some water. Arriving there he chooses not to turn the lights on, he can see enough with the light coming from outside through the window. Jared helps himself with a tall glass of cold water and sits on a stool at the island counter, supporting his head on his hand, feeling the sweat running down his temples.

Suddenly light floods the kitchen.

“Oh shit!” Jared looks up, and of course it’s Jensen. “You scared me, Jared! You trying to be a ghost or something?”

Jared chooses not to answer, instead just lowers his head again and stares at his glass.

Jensen sits on the opposite side of the kitchen island. “Are you okay? You look kinda sick.”

Jared lifts his head again, staring at Jensen. He knows how pale and sweaty he is after his puking session.

“Feeling nauseous, that’s all. Came down for a glass of water.”

Jensen bits his bottom lip, Jared isn’t sure if he wants to say something, so he waits. It’s not like Jared himself has anything else to say to Jensen. Eventually the man speaks.

“What about yesterday? Feeling better?”

Jared decides not to answer as Jensen is expecting. He is not feeling better but he will _not_ tell Jensen that. “Look, I’m sorry for the ridiculous scene I put up last night.”

“May I ask what made you cry like that?”

Jared sighs, feeling suddenly exhausted. “Jensen, you don’t need to pretend you care about me, okay? I really appreciate that moment of truce between us, but that doesn’t change how we feel about each other.”

Jensen gives Jared a look he can’t decypher, and he’s too tired to even try, so he goes on. “Look, I think it’s better for all of us if we respect and avoid each other as long as we live under the same roof. I have too many things on my plate right now, I don’t want to have to worry about you all the time on top of it all. I’m too tired to fight.”

With that, Jared finishes his water and leaves Jensen alone in the kitchen, shuffling back to his bedroom to try and get a little more sleep.

*

Jared wakes up still feeling a little off, his stomach still not feeling too well. It has been some time since he has felt those symptoms, pretty much only before he found out he was pregnant, but now it feels like it’s all coming back. Just great. He decides to try a light breakfast, maybe some toast and coffee since he has a doctor’s appointment today and he doesn’t want to go feeling like shit.

Since he woke up a little later than usual, he knows everyone else probably had breakfast already, but to him that’s even better. He could use the time alone. The dining table is still set for breakfast, and he can see Donna in the backyard through the large windows, she’s probably working on her orchids. Loretta comes from the kitchen and spots Jared.

“Morning, Loretta.” Jared gives her a small smile, he really likes the Ackles’ cook. She always treats him well.

“Good morning, boy. I’ll be right back, I have something for you.”

Jared frowns, wondering what it could be. He grabs himself a couple pieces of toast and spreads butter on them. Loretta comes back with a mug, and Jared can see steam coming out of it. She sets the mug in front of him.

“Drink this, darling. It’s ginger tea, with some lemon. I was asked to give it to you, it’s a great remedy for the nausea.”

Jared gives her a fond smile. “Oh thanks Loretta. This is actually great!”

She gives Jared an affectionate rub on the back and goes back to the kitchen. It takes a while, Jared is already taking the first sip after blowing the tea for a while so it won’t be as hot, when it dawns on him.

How did Loretta know he was feeling nauseated?

Did she say she was_ told_ to give the tea to Jared?

Jared frowns, setting the mug on the table. The only person who knew Jared wasn’t feeling okay was…well, Jensen. But there is absolutely no way Jensen would bother to tell Loretta to give Jared ginger tea. First he would have to actually know this helps, second he would have to go through the trouble, and Jared knows he wouldn’t. He has made pretty clear how he feels about Jared.

But it doesn’t make sense how the cook would know that. Maybe… maybe Jensen briefly mentioned to Donna and she was the one who told Loretta about the tea? It would make more sense that she would know something like this, she’s had two kids.

Jared tries to force all of that to the back of his mind and drinks his tea, which is the whole point of all of this. He will end up going crazy thinking too much.

Later Jared goes to the clinic for his appointment with the obstetrician. He decided to go alone, Donna even wanted to go with him but she was having a friend coming over today, and Jared actually prefers this way. It’s his baby, and he wants to go see him, or her, by himself. The family’s driver takes Jared, who is glad that the Ackles got him a great health insurance so he can have the best care. Not that he would have minded doing everything at Planned Parenthood like he was originally doing, but it doesn’t hurt to have the extra comfort.

Dr. Ferris is a very nice woman, who makes Jared feel comfortable. She examines him, prescribes some vitamins and gives him tips for the duration of the pregnancy. Then she makes him lie down so she can see the baby. She rubs a gel on his belly and places a wand on it, and suddenly something comes up on the monitor at the same time a noise fills the room.

“This is the baby’s heart, Jared. It’s beating strong as it should. And here’s your beautiful little guy. Or girl.”

Jared’s eyes fill with tears as he hears the heartbeats, the first real proof of life he has of his baby, that they’re really in there, a human being. It’s a foreign emotion, but strong. He wishes he had someone with him to share this moment. But the most important thing is that his baby is alive and apparently doing well.

“Is… is everything okay with my baby? Can you tell if it’s a boy or a girl?”

Dr. Ferris examines the screen for a while. “From what I can see, everything is just fine. It’s for sure just one baby, but I can’t tell the gender just yet, it’s a bit early for that. In a few weeks, maybe.”

Jared lets out a deep breath, knowing his baby is doing okay is enough for him. The doctor prints a picture of the ultrasound so Jared can take home with him.

Arriving home, Jared finds Donna on the couch with another woman. Donna smiles when she spots him.

“Jared, son! I’m glad you’re home! I want to introduce you to one of my dearest friends, this is Jackie.”

Jared smiles and shakes the woman’s hand. “It’s nice to meet you.”

Jackie giggles, turning to Donna. “Oh my, he’s just as handsome as you said!” The woman faces Jared again. “She was telling me about you, dear.”

Jared blushes. “I hope only nice things.”

“Sure thing, dear! She was also bragging about her grandchild in there!”

Donna takes a moment to place a hand on Jared’s shoulder. “Sweetie, how was the appointment? Is everything okay with the baby?”

Jared smiles kindly at her. “Yeah, it’s all good. Baby is doing just fine, as healthy as possible. She couldn’t make out the gender yet but hopefully soon we will know.” Jared takes the picture out of his backpack and hands it to Donna. “Here’s a picture of the baby.”

Both women coo over it, sitting back on the couch to examine it. Jared decides to leave them to it and goes upstairs for a shower and take off his street clothes. By the time Jared returns to the living room, Jensen is standing behind the couch with the ultrasound picture in his hand, staring at it. Jared feels a pang in his heart. _His baby_.

“Jared, darling! I was just showing Jensen the picture of his nephew, or niece!” Donna tells him excitedly, not picking up the tension coming from Jared, who forces a smile to her. He turns to Jensen and extends a hand, and Jensen gives him the picture back.

“Nice picture,” Jensen says with an unreadable expression on his face.

Jared lowers his voice so only Jensen can hear, and cocks his head to the side. “Well, now at least you have proof that I’m really pregnant and not lying to everyone about this as well.”

With that Jared goes back to his room, clutching the picture in his hand and leaving an astonished Jensen behind.

_ **Jensen** _

Fuck Jared. No seriously, fuck him. The dude gets under Jensen’s skin and on his nerves, who does he think he is? Jensen even tried to be nice. He comforted Jared when he was sobbing in the den for some unknown reason. He even went as far as googling what was good for pregnancy nausea after he met Jared at the kitchen in the middle of the night, and told Loretta to prepare tea for him when he woke up. Jensen should be canonized.

And then he went and got all pissy when he saw Jensen holding the picture of the ultrasound. The face he made was like Jensen was holding the baby and not just a picture. And what is the big deal with that picture anyway? It’s not like you can even see anything in it, calm down. And Jared went as far as imply that Jensen thought that he was lying about the pregnancy as well, Jensen never questioned that. Yes, he does believe Jared is taking advantage of them but the doctor himself told them about the baby. So yeah, fuck you Jared.

Jensen is getting out of the shower, a towel around his waist as he wanders around his room when there’s a light knock on the door which is ajar. Without waiting for an answer Jared peeks in. Jensen huffs and walks to the door, opening it all the way.

“What do you want?”

Jared looks at Jensen up and down and lifts an eyebrow, handing him a phone - Jensen’s phone. “You left your phone downstairs, your fianceé has been calling you.”

Jensen grabs the phone from Jared’s hand and murmurs a thanks. Jensen keeps a hand on the door, ready to close it, but Jared doesn’t move. Against his better judgment Jensen’s graze trails down and he can see Jared is wearing only a pair of boxer briefs and a white tank top, all ready for bed.

“What are you looking at?” Jared asks, making Jensen look back up. He scoffs.

“You are the one checking me out, Jared!”

“Ha! You wish!”

Jensen makes a motion to close the door. “I think you need to go away now.”

Jared narrows his eyes at him. “Douchebag,” he murmurs loud enough for Jensen to hear before turning around and leaving the room.

Jensen slams the door after him, feeling his blood boiling. Who does this prick thinks he is?

*

The next morning, Jensen is walking downstairs when he hears excited voices. Frowning, he heads to the living room to find Donna, Jared, Chad and Jeff talking animatedly. Okay, what the fuck?

“Jeff, what are you doing here?” Jensen doesn’t mean to be this rude but he isn’t on the greatest of moods today.

Jeff simply smiles at him. “We have that meeting on the other side of the city today, remember? I thought I’d pick you up so we can ride together.”

“Fine.” Jensen heads to the kitchen for some needed coffee, pouring a good amount in his travel mug so he can drink on the go, and heads back to the living room to find his mother and Jared cheering.

“May I ask what’s the celebration about?”

Jeff is the one who answers. “Jensen, I just hired Chad to work at our agency, I know he worked at some amazing beauty salons in San Antonio and we could use someone new. He is truly heaven sent.”

Jensen narrows his eyes at him, his mood dropping even more. “Shouldn’t I be consulted before we hire new people?”

Jeff gets up from the couch and squeezes Jensen’s shoulder. “Come on Jensen, don’t be so grumpy. You know how much we needed a new hair stylist anyway.” Jeff turns to Chad. “Chad, you can come to the agency tomorrow morning, we have someone there who will teach you the ropes.”

Chad smiles and shakes Jeff’s hand. “Thank you for the opportunity Mr. Morgan.”

“Please call me Jeff.”

Jensen groans, it’s gonna be a long day.

Thankfully it’s also a very busy day, they have a lot of meetings and manage to close some good deals for the agency, so Jensen’s mood improves a bit. He even forgives Jeff enough to stop by his apartment once they are done for the day to get in a much needed stress-relief session. By the time he gets home everyone is already in their rooms, and Jensen tells himself it’s a good thing.

He sure as hell didn’t want to see Jared tonight, he totally didn’t.

*

In the morning, Donna surprises Jensen by asking him to give Chad a ride to the agency.

Apparently Chad is taken by surprise as well, because he widens his eyes. “No, it’s not necessary! I can take the bus, it’s no problem!”

Donna tsks. “Bullshit, Jensen is heading there anyway. He can drive you.”

Jensen sighs, he knows he won’t get out of this one. “Okay then, come on. I need to be there soon.”

The silence in the car is very awkward, and Chad attempts to break it.

“Thank you for the opportunity at the agency, Jensen.”

Jensen barely looks at him. “Thank Jeff, he was the one who decided to hire you.”

“Well, thanks anyway.”

Jensen decides to make some small talk, seeing an opportunity opening. “Were you and my brother together for long?”

Chad sighs. “Almost two years.”

Jensen licks his lips, trying to play nonchalant. “What about the father of Jared’s baby? Do you know who he is? Any idea?”

Chad gives him a bitch face. “Come on Jensen, there’s no way in hell I’m discussing this subject with you, you know that.”

Jensen scoffs. “Apparently Brock painted a horrible picture of me to you, huh?”

“He didn’t have to say anything, Jensen. The way you’ve acted ever since I first met you speaks for itself.”

Jensen doesn’t say anything, he just drives in silence until they get to the agency.

Arriving in the large office Jensen shares with Jeff, his partner welcomes Chad and introduces him to James, who is responsible for managing hair and make up for photoshoots, and James takes Chad around to show him everything. Once they leave, Jeff turns to Jensen.

“Did you two come together?”

Jensen nods, his jaw set. “Yeah, my mom asked me to bring him.”

Jeff raises his eyebrows. “Okay so let me get this straight. Chad is living in your house to keep Jared company?”

“Yes, so not only I have to put up with Jared, now I have to deal with his bestie as well.”

“What is exactly your problem with Jared, Jensen?”

Jensen rolls his eyes. “I don’t know okay? We just didn’t click, that’s all! I think I have the right not to like people.”

Jeff frowns, studying Jensen for a few moments. “I just find it weird, that’s all. You’re always so easy going around people, I have never seen someone getting under your skin like this.”

Jensen doesn’t answer, just keeps busing turning his computer on. He doesn’t understand why he allows himself to be this affected by Jared either.

**TO BE CONTINUED...**


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> thank you again for reading this story! As usual, if you can spare some time to share your thoughts on the chapter, I'd love to know them!
> 
> In this chapter some important discoveries are on the way! Hope you enjoy it!

_**Jared** _

A couple of hours after Jensen and Chad left for the agency, Jared decides to go to the kitchen for a snack. He is very excited about his friend getting a job so fast, he has a lot to thank Jeff for. He knows that Jensen wasn’t very fond of the idea when Jeff told him, he only hopes the man isn’t rude to Chad or anything like that. Jared is beyond happy to have his friend living close to him again.

As Jared prepares a sandwich, he hears Donna speaking on the phone with someone.

“...no, it’s okay. I understand it. I can go by myself, I’m gonna be fine. No, seriously, it’s alright, don’t worry.”

She enters the kitchen at the same time as she hangs up the phone, and smiles at Jared when she sees him. Jared smiles back.

“Is everything okay?”

Donna shrugs. “Yeah, it’s just that I have a chemo session today and Alan can’t get off work to go with me, he always does. But it’s okay, Charles will drive me.”

“I can go with you.”

Donna smiles at him again. “It’s okay son, don’t bother yourself with it. I can go by myself, it’s okay.”

Jared shakes his head, fully intending on returning at least a bit of what Donna has done for him so far. “No, seriously. I wouldn’t mind keeping you company, I don’t want you to go alone.”

“Okay, fine. I won’t complain about having such a lovely company with me!”

So Jared goes with Donna to the hospital, and waits patiently as she receives the chemotherapy. When she walks out of the infusion room, Jared gets up to greet her.

“Hey, how are you feeling?”

Donna smiles at him. “Good. Great, actually! You know what, I don’t even feel like going home. Why don’t I take you to visit my son’s agency? You can see the place Chad is gonna work from now on, and I’d really like to take you there.”

Jared smiles, deciding to humor Donna. “Sure, why not?”

The driver parks in front of the JAM Modeling, it’s a very important looking building. Donna walks inside and Jared follows her, taking a look around.

“I’m gonna go in the office to say hi to Jensen. Want to come?”

Jared shakes his head. “Nah, I’m gonna wait out here. You go ahead.”

Donna leaves Jared, who takes his time to explore the area. It’s a very nice place, he can see Jensen and Jeff have good taste. He studies a large wall with countless pictures of male and female models. Jared’s mind wanders, he thinks about the time where he used to model himself, do some photoshoots for small magazine editorials so he could earn some extra money, but it was something Jared really loved doing. Then Justin came along, and Jared pushed this to the side so he could focus on him. And then came the pregnancy and Jared had to give up on that once and for all.

He is lost in thoughts staring at the wall when Jensen comes out of his office.

“Hey, Jared.”

Jared turns around to look at Jensen, who is staring at him. “Hey.”

Jensen clears his throat. “So… thank you for going with my mom to her chemo session, I appreciate that she wasn’t alone.”

Jared shrugs, giving Jensen a microscopic smile. “Well, it’s not like it was a huge sacrifice. And I didn’t want her to be alone either.”

“Well, I don’t know if the doctor switched her medication or what, but she’s feeling much better than she usually does after her sessions. She’s even talking about having a small dinner tonight at home.”

Jared smiles a bit wider and nods, feeling truly good about hearing that. “That’s great.” He takes another look around the agency, and decides to take a leap of faith, something tells him to.

“Your agency is very nice, I like it a lot.” Jensen gives Jared a half smile in appreciation, and he goes on. “You know… I once dreamed about being a model. I did some magazine editorials back in San Antonio, just small, local stuff you know? I used to really like doing those even if they didn’t pay a lot of money. But I wanted to build a good career ya know? Maybe go to New York someday to make it big, hit the important mags.”

Jensen crosses his arms in front of him and raises his eyebrows at Jared, looking curious. “Oh really? And why did you quit it?”

Jared shrugs, turning to stare at the wall of pictures again and imagining himself in there, his voice carrying a longing tone to it. “A lot of things happened in my life and that dream had to stay behind.”

“Well…” Jensen speaks in a soft voice. “It’s never too late to start over again.”

Jared turns around again to face Jensen. “Not anymore. I have other priorities now, Jensen. First of all, I have my child to think about.”

Jensen stares intensely at Jared for a few moments, and Jared stares back. A moment passes between them, something Jared can’t explain. All he knows is that it deeply touches him. Before he can think about what it means though, Danneel walks in and covers Jensen’s eyes with her tiny hands.

“Hey baby! Guess who!”

Jensen chuckles, his posture changing, and he gently grabs Danneels hands, turning around to give her a chaste kiss on the lips. “Hey Danni. Wait just a second okay, gonna take care of a few things and we can go.”

Jensen gives Jared a look and walks back into his office. Danneel takes the opportunity to chat with Jared about the wedding, and he smiles politely at her even though his mind is completely elsewhere.

*

Dinner is basically spent with Danneel gushing about the wedding preparations the whole time. Hearing her talking about her wedding to Jensen so animatedly for some reason makes Jared feel weird. He can’t put his finger on it, but it’s probably wistful envy because he wished to have the same thing with Justin.

When Jared starts paying attention to Jensen though, he realizes he is not too excited himself. He smiles when Danneel says something directly to him and answers at the appropriate times, but Jared can see Jensen doesn’t want to take part in the conversation. About his own wedding. Which seems kind of odd.

Later, when everyone is ready for bed, Jared goes downstairs for some water and finds Jensen on the couch, lying against the back of it and staring at nothing. Against his better judgment, Jared goes to him and sits down on the armchair.

“You know, for a guy who is about to get married, you don’t seem too happy about it.”

Jensen’s gaze travels to Jared and gives him a scowl. “This is none of your business.”

Jared puts his hands in front of him in a surrender gesture. “You’re right, it’s not.” He gets up to go get his water, but walks back as he remembers something. Jared decides to take a risk and prays he’s not wrong.

“By the way, thank you for telling Loretta to give me the tea the other day.”

Jensen’s eyes widen in surprise. “How do you know I was the one who told her about the ginger tea? Could’ve been anyone else.”

Jared can’t help but smile at Jensen for the first time. “You were the only one who knew I was feeling nauseous. And by the way… I didn’t mention that it was ginger tea.” Jensen’s mouth opens at being caught, and Jared’s smile widens. “It really helped, so thank you. Good night, Jensen.”

Smiling at himself as if he can’t help it, Jared walks away before Jensen can say anything. He feels a little something inside of him that he can’t put a name on. It’s weird, but maybe in a good way.

Today was a good day.

*

Jared hangs out with Chad at the boat house after he comes home from work the next day, playing Nintendo and listening to Chad tell about how things are going and feeling excited for his friend’s new job. Apparently it’s going well and Jared feels truly happy for his friend. Maybe someday Chad can open his own beauty salon in Dallas.

Eventually the topic ends and Chad changes it. “What about you, Jare? How are things going, still having fights with Jensen?”

Jared bites the inside of his cheek, thinking about it. “I don’t know Chad. Jensen is weird. One moment he treats me like I’m a cheap gold digger, only after his family’s money. And in the other he asks how I’m doing, he tells Loretta to make ginger tea to help with my nausea, he thanks me for taking his mother to the chemo session and talks to me like I’m a human being. He’s truly insane, I don’t understand what the deal is with him.”

Chad thinks for a while as they race each other on Mario Kart. “Well Jare… maybe Jensen is at that phase in life where he doesn’t know who he is, what he wants, or where he stands. I guess everyone goes through something like that.”

Jared raises an eyebrow, not taking his eyes off the game. “Yeah, when we are fifteen years old or so.”

Chad shrugs. “Well, if this is Jensen’s mental age, there’s nothing we can do about it.”

Jared chuckles and cheers as he wins the race, laughing as Chad curses and throws the control at him.

*

A couple of days later, Jared is chilling in the living room, watching TV. He has barely seen Jensen ever since the night of Donna’s impromptu little dinner. She has mentioned to Jared that Jensen has been busy at the agency, more often than not staying extra hours to take care of everything.

It’s not that Jared _cares_, it’s not that. He is mildly aware that Jensen hasn’t arrived yet, but this fact barely registered his mind. The fact that he’s watching TV in the living room instead of his bedroom doesn’t mean anything. Well, maybe that he likes the comfortable couch, and the TV here is bigger. And the living room is more airy than his room. That’s all.

The main door opens and Jared immediately gets up from the couch, slowly walking to the foyer to see who has arrived. When he sees Jensen, Jared nonchalantly raises his eyebrows.

“Oh, it’s you.”

“Hey, Jared.” Jensen murmurs, looking at Jared just for a second before heading to the stairs. But it’s enough for Jared to notice there’s something wrong with him. He follows Jensen and stops him with a hand on his arm.

“Hold on a second.” Jared forces Jensen to turn around, and the man avoids his eyes, keeping his gaze down. Jared leans down to get a better look at Jensen’s face, his heart skipping a beat when he sees a black eye, and he gasps.

“What the hell happened, Jensen?”

Jensen shrugs, still avoiding Jared’s gaze. “Got into a fight with Danneel’s brother, that’s all. I’ll go up to my room.”

For a second Jared considers letting Jensen go, but a part of him tells him not to. So he sighs. “I’ll get you some ice for that. Go sit down on the couch, I’ll be right there.”

It looks like Jensen is going to decline and go to his room like he was planning, but as he studies Jared for a couple of seconds, biting his bottom lip, he finally gives a short nod.

“Fine,” Jensen murmurs, walking to the couch. Jared goes to the kitchen and grabs a small bowl, filling it with ice cubes, and also a couple dishcloths.

He goes to the living room and finds Jensen on the couch, leaning against the back, his eyes closed. Jared sits next to him, his heart racing for being this close to the man who despises him. But he takes a deep breath, telling himself it’s gonna be okay. Jared carefully wraps two ice cubes in the cloth, creating a small bag. When he looks up, Jensen has his head turned and is looking at him.

“It’s… it’s gonna be a bit cold.” Jared says in a whisper, and Jensen nods.

“I can take it.”

For a second Jared thinks Jensen wants for him to hand him the ice, but he makes no move to take it, just waits. So Jared raises his hand and gently presses the ice to Jensen’s eye, who keeps it closed. He hisses with the cold touch, but stays still.

Jared watches Jensen, and he can’t help himself. “Why did you get into a fight with Danneel’s brother?”

Jensen doesn’t answer for a few moments and Jared thinks he isn’t going to, but he opens his eyes as Jared removes the ice from his face for a bit.

“Well, because he was a dick to his girlfriend. She arrived at Danni’s house to visit him and he had two girls with him, one under each arm. And he didn’t even care that she was upset about it, even made fun of her. So I went to confront him, tell him he shouldn’t treat a girl like this, you just don’t do stuff like this. And well, you can imagine the rest.”

Jared just studies Jensen for a moment, taking it in. He gives Jensen a tiny smile. “I never expected such a hero attitude coming from you. It’s impressive, actually.”

Jensen chuckles. “Well, I’m full of surprises apparently. Maybe I don’t know myself.”

Jared applies the ice to his eye again, feeling a sudden warmth taking over him, and it’s hard to explain. Neither of them say anything else, Jared just spends a little while applying ice to Jensen’s eye.

Eventually Jared thinks it’s enough already, most of the ice having melted.

“I’m taking this to the kitchen,” he murmurs but Jensen just hums, keeping his eyes closed and staying still.

Jared takes care of everything in the kitchen and then grabs a glass of water and finds some Tylenol for Jensen so he won’t hurt as much in the morning. As he returns to the living room though, he finds Jensen obviously sleeping. Jared doesn’t want to disturb him for now, so he leaves the water and pill on the end table for when he wakes up. Jared sits down next to Jensen again to inspect his eye, and can’t help studying his face. He has never had the chance to actually see Jensen’s face in detail, and he realizes the man has freckles dusting his cheeks and nose. For some reason, Jared finds them fascinating. He notices there’s a trail of water running down Jensen’s cheek, from the ice cubes. Jared reaches up and very gently wipes it with the back of his fingers. Jensen makes a very small movement with his head, keeping his eyes closed. Jared jerks away, coming out of his trance. He quickly turns off the TV and hurries up to his bedroom. The image of Jensen’s face, for some reason, follows him into his dreams that night.

Jared completely misses how Jensen wakes up just a few moments after Jared left him, bringing a hand to his cheek, feeling the ghost of a gentle touch there.

*

Jared sits at the breakfast table the next morning with Alan, Donna and Chad, lost in his thoughts. The events from last night are replaying over and over in his mind, on a loop. Chad shoots him some funny looks but doesn’t say anything. Jared plays with his eggs on his plate when he hears a voice.

“Morning, family!”

Jared immediately looks up as Jensen enters the dining room, wearing sunglasses. He kisses Donna on the cheek and squeezes Alan’s shoulder, then turns to Chad.

“Hey man, do you need a ride? I’m going to the agency now.”

“Yeah man, sure!” Chad gets up as Donna looks at Jensen.

“You’re not having breakfast, son?”

Jensen shakes his head. “Nah, I have a meeting soon, don’t have time.”

Then Jensen finally looks at Jared, giving him a small smile. “Morning, Jared.”

Jared returns the smile with a shy one. “Good morning, Jensen.”

“Thanks for, you know…” Jensen lifts his sunglasses so Jared can see his black eye as he stands behind Donna and Alan. “...the help yesterday.”

Jared nods, his heart suddenly skipping a beat, and Jensen leaves with Chad on tow.

*

Jared spends pretty much all day long thinking about Jensen. The man is a mystery. Sure, he is spoiled and an asshole on the surface, but Jared is slowly learning that there are some deeper layers in him. I mean, Jensen got into a fight with his future brother-in-law to defend his girlfriend’s honor. Not everyone would do something like this, most guys would turn a blind eye to it. Jared has some mixed feelings when it comes to Jensen, he can’t quite read him. It’s like something is missing, he’s only looking at the very surface of him. Yesterday he got a small glimpse of what could be underneath that tough guy façade.

But Jared doesn’t want to think too much about Jensen. Well, he is obviously gorgeous, that can’t go unnoticed for sure. But Jared would never think of him as something else. Jensen is probably the last guy on the planet that Jared would want to have a connection with. And even if by a tiny tiny chance he would - which he does_ not_ \- it’s not like he could. First of all, Jared is pregnant with someone else’s kid. So he isn’t much of a boyfriend material right now and he does not want to be, especially after everything he went through with Justin. His only priority is his child now, he’s fine by himself. And second of all, Jensen isn’t even gay. He’s engaged to Danneel so he would be completely off limits. That is, in that very tiny scenario where Jared would actually be bothered by this, which of course he is not.

Later, Jared is in his room relaxing when Chad comes rushing in, locking the door behind him. Jared sits up in bed as his friend sits down on it.

“Hey Chad what’s up?”

His friend looks at him with a weird look on his face. “Jare, there’s something I need to tell you.”

Jared frowns, suddenly worried. “What is it, Chad? Something happened?”

“Well… yeah. Jare, you have no idea who I saw making out at the agency today.”

Jared’s frown deepens. “Who?”

Chad sighs before dropping the bomb. “Jensen and Jeff.”

Jared’s stomach drops at hearing that, not sure he understands well. “What? Are you sure about that, Chad? Jensen and Jeff?? That’s… that’s not possible.”

“Yeah it is, Jare. I walked into their office to talk to Jeff, the secretary wasn’t there so I knocked and went in. They didn’t hear me because there was music on, but they were totally making out on the couch.”

Jared feels numb, all of the sudden, that’s something he was definitely not expecting. “But… but why would he do something like that to Danneel? He’s-he’s fucking _engaged_, Chad!” Anger starts taking over him. “I just… I mean, I thought… well, then Jensen is just the asshole I thought he was! You don’t do that to your fianceé, that’s just low! Oh my God, he’s such an asshole.”

Chad stares at him for a while. “Well, I didn’t think you would be so upset with it, we already knew Jensen was an asshole, didn’t we?”

Jared swallows hard and nods, trying to get himself under control. “Yeah, sure… yeah. I’m just thinking about Danneel, that’s all. She’s nice. She doesn’t deserve it.”

“Yeah, she sure doesn’t. By the way, is there something going on with you? You seemed all pensive and distracted at breakfast today.”

Jared shakes his head, looking down. “It’s nothing. I just had a dream, that’s all. Nothing more than that.”

Once Chad leaves, Jared can’t stop thinking about the new discovery. Jensen is a fucking hypocrite, he gave Danneel’s brother hell for cheating on his girlfriend while he’s out there doing the same thing. He hates Jensen for going behind Danneel’s back like this. But a tiny part of him, one Jared wants to punch, tells him that this means Jensen isn’t so straight after all.

Well, damn him.

_ **Jensen** _

Jensen has been fighting it, but there’s no denying that something in him shifted regarding Jared. He wants to believe the guy is no good, that he’s a gold digger and all that. But there’s just _something_. How passionately he spoke about the time he used to modeling, how things have changed in his life that he had to abandon his dream. And then how Jared took care of him when Jensen came home with the black eye, how he cared…

Well, of course it could all be an act. Jared could be playing Jensen so he doesn’t tell the truth about him. That’s more likely the case, but Jensen doesn’t know if he wants to believe that. He decides to go for lunch by himself at a small place close to the agency since Jeff is out at a meeting - and if Jensen is being completely honest, he’d rather spend some time alone. Walking back from the restaurant, he passes by a store that sells baby stuff and against his will, he hesitates and stops. Jensen knows he shouldn’t care about Jared and his baby, but… this store has some good stuff. And well, the baby is important to his mom. That’s what Jensen tells himself when he gets inside and buys a tiny yellow onesie with a moose and a squirrel on it. For some reason that gesture warms his heart, and suddenly he can’t wait to give it to Jared. Jensen doesn’t think Jared has been able to buy anything for the baby yet, so hopefully the man will appreciate it.

Arriving home later Jensen works up the courage to walk to Jared’s bedroom, and takes a deep breath before knocking on the door. Jared opens it and when he sees Jensen, his eyes narrow.

“What do you want?”

Jensen’s heart skips a beat as he shows Jared the small shopping bag. “I--I bought this for the baby. I saw it and I thought… well, it’s probably time you start thinking about the baby’s layette.”

Jared takes the bag and stares at it for a second, only to hand it back to Jensen. “I don’t want it.”

Jensen’s eyes widen and his heart sinks as he takes the bag back. “W-what? Why?”

Jared raises an eyebrow. “I don’t want anything coming from you, Jensen. Not after what I found out about you.”

“What did you find out Jared?”

When Jared doesn’t answer, just stares at him with a smug look on his face, Jensen starts getting pissed.

“Come on, dude! What did you find out about me?”

“Jensen if you have the tiniest bit of conscience, you will know what I’m talking about. Unless you don’t have any conscience at all, or you have so much shit to hide that you can’t even tell which one I’m talking about.”

“Whoa there! Who is hiding shit here is you, Jared! My life is an open book. Yours on the other hand…”

Jared scoffs. “Oh my god I can’t believe how shameless you are!”

At that Jensen has had enough, realizing he had been right all along. “You are the one who is shameless here, Jared. But I know what this is. You got closer to me so I wouldn’t tell everyone who you really are.”

Jared just shakes his head. “And to think I almost believed you were a loyal, decent person, and that your brother might have been wrong about you. Now I see I was the one who was wrong.”

“Jesus Christ, what the hell are you talking about, Jared?”

“Nothing Jensen, I’m not talking about anything! You know what, from now on it’s for the best that we don’t talk to each other anymore.”

“Oh great, I’m totally down for that.”

Jared makes a motion to close the door but stops, having one last thing to say. “I only feel bad for Danneel. She deserves better than to tie herself to a lying asshole like you.”

With that Jared slams the door on Jensen’s face, leaving him in the hallway, dumbstruck. What the hell is Jared’s problem? He storms off to his own room and throws the shopping bag on a shelf in his closet. Damn him for trying to be nice.

*

Jensen is grumpy during the whole day following his argument with Jared. He tries not to think about it but the harder he tries, the harder the whole thing can’t get off his mind. What does Jared know? He didn’t… well, there’s no way he learned about Jensen and Jeff, did he? He couldn’t have, nobody knows it but Jeff and himself. Jared was bluffing, that’s for sure. Damn him.

There’s an event at the agency that night, and Jensen couldn’t be less excited about a party. But since he is one of the owners he is supposed to go. Danneel goes with him, hanging off his arm in a beautiful dress and throwing smiles all around. Jeff suddenly decides he also wants Jensen’s attention, going as far as cornering him in the men’s room to make out in an empty stall, leaving Jensen afraid of getting caught and slightly pissed off. And to top it off, Jeff forces Jensen to give him a ride when he says he’s leaving to drive Danneel home since she claimed to be tired. Jensen has never felt like this towards Jeff, but now he’s annoyed and bothered by the man forcing himself on Jensen all the damn time, especially when Jensen is supposed to be with his fianceé. He can’t shake off the feeling that this is disrespectful as fuck.

Jensen lies in bed that night, wide awake, staring at the ceiling. A thousand things going through his mind, how Jared told him he almost believed Jensen was someone nice; how Chad said it’s the way Jensen acts; how Danni told him the other day that Jeff said to her Jensen was a true prince; how Jeff said while they were making out a few days ago that he knows Jensen doesn’t like the vanilla kind of life, he enjoys what Jeff has to offer him.

Does he?

Suddenly Jensen is not so sure anymore, he’s not sure about anything. He feels adrift, confused, it’s like he doesn’t recognize himself, the man he has become, and he doesn’t like it. Maybe it’s time for him to make some changes in his life.

*

On the following night, Jensen goes to Jeff’s apartment. When Jeff opens the door and lets Jensen in, he smiles.

“I thought you had forgotten,” he says closing the door.

Jensen frowns. “Forgotten what?”

Jeff’s eyebrows shoot up. “The anniversary of when I first saw you. It was eight years ago, remember? I know I could never forget.”

It never ceases to amaze Jensen how Jeff even remembers those things. He always thought only chicks got so attached to details such as dates. Jensen takes a deep breath so he can do what he came here to do.

“Yeah Jeff, we were really happy during those years.”

Jeff immediately picks up on the past tense. “Were?”

Jensen bites the inside of his cheek, trying to hold Jeff’s gaze. “I can’t do this anymore, Jeff. It’s over.”

Jeff’s eyes narrow as he takes in what Jensen just said. “What the fuck brought this on, Jensen?”

“I don’t know,” Jensen shrugs and starts pacing around the living room of Jeff’s fancy apartment. “I just have been doing a lot of thinking lately and I don’t want to cheat on Danneel any longer. It’s wrong, Jeff.”

Jeff chuckles. “Oh, this is what it’s about? Jensen come on! You know very well that love is one thing and sex is another completely different. It’s completely okay for us to be attracted to each other and have fun together while you are in love with Danneel. One thing does not negate the other.”

Jensen scoffs, not believing what he is hearing. “Jeff, it’s like you take a perverse pleasure in fooling Danneel, in going behind her back with all of this. Like at the party yesterday. You love playing this dangerous game, it’s like you’re turned on by it!”

Jeff walks to his liquor cabinet, pouring some bourbon for himself and for Jensen, but when he tries to give Jensen the glass, he simply shakes his head. Jeff sighs, rolling his eyes and taking a sip of his drink.

“Look Jensen, unlike what you may think, I’m not with you just for the pleasure of being your lover, okay?”

“Well, it surely seems like it! You’ve always loved this hidden thing between us, and you also love seeing me with other people apparently. You are the one who introduced me to Danneel, goddamnit!”

Jeff sits down in an armchair and looks up at Jensen, glass in hand. “Do you want me to feel guilty for letting you be free? Tell me something, Jensen. If I had demanded fidelity from you, would we have been together all these years? For real?”

Jensen sits down beside him, feeling dizzy with the thousand things reeling through his mind. “I don’t know the answer to that, Jeff. How can we know something for sure when it didn’t happen?” Jensen sighs, rubbing his eyes with his thumb and forefinger, suddenly feeling drained. “Look, I just wish I could be more to you than just recess time, ya know?”

Jeff studies him for a few moments as he drinks his bourbon. “What the hell happened to you, Jensen? You’ve been acting weird ever since your brother died.”

Jensen leans back against the armchair and looks up, licking his bottom lip and trying to organize things in his mind. “I don’t know, Jeff. I just have this feeling that you don’t take me seriously, and the only thing Danneel cares about is the wedding day. I just…” Jensen leans forward and rests his elbows on his thighs, looking down. “I just wish I really mattered to someone, you know? For real.”

Jeff sets his glass on the end table and turns to Jensen. “Jensen, you do matter to me. What we have is serious, you know that.”

Jensen shakes his head and looks at Jeff. “No, I really don’t.”

Jeff scoffs. “Well, if after eight years you don’t know how I feel about you, then it’s probably time to end things indeed. It’s a shame though, because what we have together is pretty amazing, we are only together because we damn want to, because we take and give pleasure to each other, because we understand each other and how we have always worked. We never needed anything official between us. But if this isn’t good enough for you, then…”

Jeff gets up and walks to the door, opening it wide. Jensen gets up as well and walks outside, but stops in the hall. What_ is_ he doing? Jeff is right, what they have works, it always has. Jensen is being stupid for wanting to end things now, this whole situation is messing with his head.

So Jensen turns around and walks back into the apartment. “I’m sorry. I don’t know what has gotten into me.”

Jensen pulls Jeff close so he can kiss him.

Later, as they lie in bed together after some great sex, Jeff lights up a cigarrette. “You know… I would make a terrible husband to you.” Jensen chuckles, and Jeff goes on. “But you do need this structure, Jensen. And you will get this from Danneel, I know it.”

Jensen knows Jeff is right. He is just being ridiculous.

**TO BE CONTINUED...**


	7. Chapter 7

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hey guys, here's chapter 7! I hope you guys are enjoying this story! And some of you are in the right track about some things, I love reading your thoughts! As usual, please let me know how you like this chapter!
> 
> And I'm gonna say something I'll probably repeat in the future: nobody in this story is perfect, they are all humans who fuck up sometimes like all of us ;)

_**Jared** _

It’s not that Jared is obsessed. It’s not that. It’s just that he can’t comprehend why Jensen loves this double life, why he cheats on Danneel like that. She is such a nice girl, she doesn’t deserve for Jensen to go behind her back like that. She doesn’t deserve Jensen _at all_, he loves to point a finger at Jared and throw on his face he is a liar but it turns out Jensen is the worst liar. What a fucking hipocryte. And the _only_ reason Jared can’t get this situation out his mind is because he is worried about Danneel, that’s it.

Jared walks downstairs and something catches his attention. There’s a phone on the table by the front door, and from the case Jared realizes it’s Jensen’s phone, has seen him with that phone before. Taking a look around, Jared makes sure he’s alone and walks to the table, picking up the phone. It lights up, showing a couple of messages from Jeff. Jared brings a hand to his mouth as he reads the messages.

_“Hey babe, gonna be a bit late to the agency today, have some errands to run so I’ll do them this morning.”_

_“By the way, you’re coming over tonight, right? Gonna get you that wine you like so much. Besos.”_

Jared is fuming, and on a whim he clears the messages from the screen. Why does Jensen keep doing stuff like that to Danneel? Jared knows he can’t just sit around and let this happen.

*

In the evening, Jared is getting out of the kitchen when Jensen arrives from work, looking like he’s in a hurry, and Jared just can’t help himself.

“Going out tonight?” He asks while chewing on some popcorn.

Jensen narrows his eyes at him. “Not that it’s any of your business, but yes I am. Unlike some people, I don’t sit around all day. I am a busy man, you know?”

With that, Jensen goes upstairs, leaving a pissed Jared behind. Who does that asshole think he is? Suddenly Jared has an idea, and fishes his phone out of his pocket, glad he saved her number.

“Hey Danni, how are you? It’s Jared.”

_“Hey Jared, sweetie! How are you? Everything okay?”_

“Well, kind of. You see, Jensen just arrived home from work and I don’t know, he looks kinda odd. Maybe he’s coming down with something, but he does not look 100% okay. I was wondering if you couldn’t come over here to surprise him and take care of him? I’m sure he would just love that. I know he hasn’t said anything as not to worry you.”

_“Oh my God Jared, thanks for letting me know! I’m definitely coming over, I’ll be there as soon as I can, I’d love to take care of my baby! You are such a good friend, you know that?”_

Jared smiles smugly. “I just try to do what I can to help.”

A bit later, Jared is in the living room watching TV with Donna and Chad when Jensen rushes downstairs.

“Son, are you going out?” Donna asks, turning to face him.

“Yeah, I…” Jensen starts but is cut off with the doorbell ringing. He opens the door and Danneel walks inside, making Jensen frown in confusion.

“Danni? What are you doing here? I thought we…” Jensen stutters and Danneel smiles cutely at him.

“I’m here to take care of you, silly! Why do you think?”

“Take care of me? But why?”

“Well, Jared was a darling and called me to let me know you weren’t feeling so well, probably coming down with something so here I am to take care of my beautiful fianceé!”

Danneel bats her eyelashes at him, and Jensen turns to Jared, a look of rage on his face. “Oh he did, didn’t he?”

Jared gives Jensen his most innocent smile, and it only grows wider when he sees how Jensen is fuming. Danneel drags Jensen upstairs and Jared silently high fives himself for the success of his plan.

Once Donna has gone to her room, Chad makes Jared tell him what he did. Jared makes an indignant face.

“What makes you think I did something?”

Chad’s patented bitch face is the only reply he gets.

“Okay! There is a possibility I called Danneel and made up a story about Jensen being sick so she would come over and he wouldn’t go out with Jeff because that’s what he was going to do Chad!”

Chad gets up and paces around the living room. “Jared, this is not of your business! If I knew you would do something like that, I wouldn’t have told you that Jensen and Jeff have a thing. You have no right to meddle in their lives like that. You’ll end up getting in trouble!”

“I just can’t stand watching Jensen lying to Danneel like that Chad, it’s wrong! She is a good girl!”

Chad scoffs. “And like I said, this is not of your business!” Jared just looks down, and Chad sits down on the couch across from him, letting out a sigh. “Jared, answer me honestly. Is the reason you’re so obsessed with Jensen because you’re actually into him?”

Jared stares at Chad in disbelief, as if his friend just grew another head, and lets out a loud laugh. “Chad, come on! How can you even think something like that? Jensen is the last person in the world I would be interested in. The guy is a jerk, come on!”

Chad shrugs, giving him a pensive look. “Well Jare… you know how some love stories begin with two people who can’t stand each other and then end up becoming something else entirely.”

Jared shares his head, no Chad is wrong. He couldn’t possibly. Not with Jensen of all people. It’s insane. Jared gets up and walks to the fireplace, taking a moment to look at the pictures there. Then he turns to his friend.

“That’s nonsense, Chad. I would never be interested in Jensen. And even if by a small chance I was, it could never happen. Come on, look at me. I’m pregnant, even if there was a small feeling we wouldn’t be able to act on it because I’m pregnant with someone else’s baby, the guy I loved, I’m living in this house lying about this whole situation, pretending to be someone I’m not. How can you possibly think I could be interested in anyone while I’m under this much pressure? That’s the last thing I need right now, and you are insane, you know that? Oh and by the way, Jensen would never be interested in me like that, he has a fianceé and a lover already to take care of. And I don’t even want him!”

Chad slowly walks towards Jared, giving him a pointed look. “Jare, I don’t know if you realize it, but you just referred to Justin as the man you_ loved_. Past tense.”

Jared gasps, not believing_ this_ is what his friend chooses to focus on. “Well, of course! After everything that happened how do you expect me to refer to Justin? All of that love stayed in the past, he hurt me too much!”

Chad purses his lips and studies Jared for a long time. “Jare, I think you’re slowly erasing Justin from your heart. And I think Jensen has something to do with it.”

Jared shakes his head in disbelief. “You’re crazy.”

Chad raises an eyebrow. “I just like to observe.”

Jared suddenly has had enough, there’s a weird feeling growing inside of him and he needs to leave. “I’m going to my room.”

Jared runs upstairs and closes his bedroom door behind him. A lot of emotions him him at once and he’s feeling so confused. He sits down on the bed and opens the drawer of the nightstand, taking a picture of Justin and him he keeps there. Jared stares at it for a long moment, and is hit with a strange feeling. He suddenly realizes he hasn’t thought about Justin, _really_ thought about him, in so long. So much has happened in his life that maybe Chad is right. Maybe Jared is erasing Justin from his life, slowly.

He spends a long time staring at the picture, studying Justin’s face, seeing how happy they once were, remembering all the great moments they spent together. There’s a light knock on the door and Chad walks inside. Jared doesn’t look away from the picture and his friend sits down on the bed next to him.

“Jare, I’m sorry. I got carried away, I shouldn’t have said those things. It was out of line, you’re right, you’re dealing with enough shit already.”

Jared shakes his head, still looking at the picture. “Nah, you’re right. It’s so weird Chad, it’s like Justin is slowly fading away. I feel like I have to make a huge effort to remember his face, ya know? It’s hard to believe that I loved him so much once, because now I feel so angry at him, he hurt me so deeply. And this fucking sucks because he’s the father of my baby and I don’t want to feel like this. I just…” Jared feels his eyes welling up and he looks at the ceiling, taking a deep breath. “I feel so lost, Chad. Like I don’t belong here, it gets exhausting to keep up with this act, and I don’t know how much more I can take.”

Chad bites the inside of his cheek and squeezes Jared’s shoulder. “It’s gonna be okay, Jare. You’ll see. It will all work out just fine.”

Jared looks at his friend and gives him a half smile. “I hope so.”

_ **Jensen** _

“Wait a second here. Jared did _what_?” Jeff asks Jensen as he closes the door to their shared office.

Jensen sighs, sitting on his chair and looking at Jeff. He is so incredibly pissed.

“What I just told you. Jared called Danneel and made up a story about me being sick so she would come over and spend the night, and I wouldn’t be able to go out. I don’t know why he would do such a thing, that annoying, meddling little brat!”

Jensen has been wondering ever since last night, why would Jared do such a thing? It’s not like they are best friends or anything, and didn’t they decide to stay out of each other’s way? What brought this up?

Jeff sits down across from him and narrows his eyes. “Does Jared know about you and me?”

Jensen frowns. “Of course not. Why would he? _How_ would he??”

Jeff shrugs. “Dunno, just wondering. You know, you were always wary about that guy and I never understood why but now I can see it. He’s smarter than I thought, he knew what he was doing when he called Danneel. Maybe he decided to go for you now that your brother is dead. Guarantee his spot in the family, maybe earn a good last name.”

Jensen frown deepens. “Nah, I don’t… I don’t think that’s it.”

Jeff is quiet for a while, studying Jensen. “Do you erase my messages after I send them? So Danneel won’t see them?”

“Danneel wouldn’t snoop like that.”

Jeff chuckles. “Yes, she would.”

“Well, it has been a few days since you messaged me anyway.”

Jeff cocks his head to the side. “I messaged you yesterday. And by the way you didn’t answer me.”

“I forgot my phone at home yesterday, I told you that, I…”

Something hits Jensen, and he bites his lower lip, thinking. At this moment Jeff’s phone rings and he excuses himself, leaving the office. Jensen thinks about when he arrived home yesterday and got his phone, there weren’t any messages showing up on the lock screen, so he didn’t think there were any. He opens his message app and finally sees the messages Jeff sent him.

What if Jared saw them?

Then Jensen remembers the conversation - or the argument - he and Jared had the other day, when Jared insinuated Jensen was hiding something.

Jared knows about Jeff and him. It’s the only explanation, it’s why he called Danneel last night, he read his messages and knew Jensen was going over to Jeff’s so he decided to screw up his plans.

Jensen runs a hand down his mouth, suddenly furious.

Fuck Jared.

*

Jensen arrives home and spots Jared on the couch, reading, but decides not to deal with him tonight, he’s too tired for this shit. But apparently Jared decides for him, since he speaks as Jensen starts heading upstairs.

“Is your cold better? You still look tired, I’d say.”

Jensen stops and turns around. “God Jared, you’re so cynical.”

Jared scoffs. “You are the one to talk.”

Jensen is suddenly furious, he throws the jacket he had been holding on the steps and walks to the living room, facing Jared.

“Aren’t you ashamed of meddling in other people’s business like this? And who gave you the right to read the messages on my phone?”

Jared stares at him with the most innocent face in the world. “Who said I read your messages Jensen?”

Jensen scoffs and sits down on the coffee table in front of Jared. “Okay Jared, let’s be honest here. I know this is hard for you, but try. You didn’t call Danneel here yesterday just to joke around. You knew what you were doing.”

Jared’s eyes widen and he gets up from the couch, walking past Jensen. “Oh really? And what is that?”

Jensen gets up as well and turns around to face him, looking straight at Jared’s eyes. “You know I’m having an affair with Jeff, don’t you?”

Jared dramatically puts a hand on his chest and his jaw drops. “_What_?? You and Jeff are having an _affair_? Oh my God!”

Jensen narrows his eyes and cocks his head to the side. “Don’t play dumb, Jared. You read the message and you knew I was going out last night to meet up with him. The question here is: how long have you known?”

Jared’s hand falls from his chest and he raises an eyebrow, dropping the act. “Let’s put it this way, you two aren’t exactly discreet about it.”

“That’s why you’re treating me like this?”

“I just don’t understand why you’re doing this to Danneel, Jensen. She is such a good girl and she doesn’t deserve it. I can’t understand you. If you like Jeff so much why don’t you just marry him? Why go behind your fianceé’s back like this?”

Jensen scoffs. “That’s just what I needed, having to explain myself to you.”

Jensen starts walking away, but Jared stops him with a hand on his chest. “I’m just trying to understand, Jensen. What’s your motive here? To feed your vanity?”

“What is _your_ motive, Jared? What brought you to this house? Why did you accept to lie that you’re having my brother’s baby?”

“We aren’t talking about me, Jensen.”

“The situation is the same.”

Jared lets out a laugh. “No it’s not, Jensen. It’s_ not_. If I’m in this house, if I said yes to this lie, is because I had strong reasons to do this, unlike you. What reasons do_ you_ have to cheat on Danneel like this?”

Jensen purses his lips as he studies Jared. “Why don’t we do like this: you mind your own business and I mind mine. Alright?”

Jared shakes his head. “Don’t you feel remorseful for doing this to her? Oh my god, you don't! I can’t believe it!”

Jensen rolls his eyes. “You don’t care about Danneel, all you want is to set things on fire. Good night Jared.” Jensen begins to leave but turns around again. “And watch out. If you give me trouble, I’ll give you ten times more trouble in return.”

Jensen heads to the stairs and starts going up, but Jared goes after him and speaks, again.

“You don’t love Danneel. In fact, you don’t even love Jeff. You don’t love anyone, Jensen.”

Jensen takes a deep breath and bites the inside of his cheek, bending down to retrieve his jacket, and looks at Jared as he holds onto the rail.

“You think you know me, Jared. But the truth is, you know as much as I know about you. Which is, nothing. Let’s each stay in our own lane.”

With that Jensen goes to his room, his heart beating a mile a minute. He hopes Jared will finally stop giving him trouble once and for all.

*

The next morning, Jensen goes to the boathouse to talk to Chad. He knocks on the door and as the man answers, Jensen greets him.

“Hello Chad. Can I talk to you for a second?”

Chad opens the door wider to allow Jensen in. Jensen puts his hands in his pockets and faces Chad as he closes the door. “Look Chad, about your friend…”

Chad cuts him off. “Look Jensen, before you start, I want you to know I don’t agree with what Jared is doing, okay? I don’t think he has any right to meddle in your life like this.”

Jensen raises an eyebrow. “Oh, so he already told you about everything?”

Chad shakes his head. “No. I was the one who told him about you and Jeff actually.”

Jensen’s jaw drops. “Excuse me?”

“Well, I happened to see you and Jeff together at the agency the other day and I told Jared. Now, I’m sorry, if I knew the big mess you guys would create, I wouldn’t have done it.”

Jensen scoffs. “Who started this mess was that idiot!”

“Jared is not an idiot, Jensen!”

“Then you should give him some advice!”

“I’m trying to do that. What about you, Jensen? Who is giving _you_ advice? Because you know, Jared isn’t the only one who is wrong.”

“Oh, so now not only you’re gonna gossip about my life, you’re gonna judge me as well?”

Chad shakes his head. “I’m not judging you. I just wish you would stop with this fight. Or at least recognize the real reason behind all of this.”

“Well, to me the reason is very clear. We don’t get along with each other.”

Chad cocks his head. “Is it really the only reason?”

Jensen has had enough of this bullshit. “Look Chad, I don’t owe you any explanations. I told Jared that either he leaves me alone or he will regret it.” Jensen walks to the door and opens it. “This goes for you too.”

Jensen walks back to the house, refusing to think too much about what Chad just told him. He is just as insane as Jared.

_ **Jared** _

A few days go by and Jared barely sees Jensen. He should be feeling great that he finally got Jensen to admit to having an affair and how he managed to get in the way of Jensen and Jeff’s night together, but he doesn’t. Jared feels weird, it doesn’t seem like a victory. At the time he felt smug that Jensen was so pissed at him, that he got the man all riled up like that, but it just feels hollow. Why did he do this anyway? For the satisfaction of watching Jensen being caught? And then what? Jensen hates him, he avoids Jared like the plague, and it kind of hurts for a reason Jared doesn’t understand. All he knows is that he’s tired of this tension.

When Brock’s birthday arrives, the mood in the house drops. Alan and Donna are visibly very sad, and Jared just keeps out of the way, allowing for the family to mourn their son. He decides to go make Chad’s company instead, since his friend is also feeling down because of this day.

He finds Chad watching a video of Brock at the Children’s Hospital in San Antonio, he would always go there to visit the oncology ward. He loved to visit the sick children and tell them stories, claimed it gave him a huge joy to bring them some joy in return. Chad would often go with him and make videos like this one. Jared smiles as he sees his friend’s face, he misses him so much. Suddenly an idea strikes him.

“Why don’t you show this to Donna and Alan, Chad? I bet they would love to see it.”

Chad smiles sadly at Jared. “Yeah… I guess you’re right.”

Jared takes the DVD out of the player and puts in the case, both of them going to the main house. They find Donna at the living room with Jensen, who is apparently comforting her. Jensen stiffens when he sees Jared, who feels a pang in his heart, but puts a smile on his face anyway.

“Donna, Chad and I wanted to show you and Alan something. It’s a video of Brock, doing something he really loved doing.”

Donna sits up straighter at that, and gives them a small smile. “Really? Oh my God, Jensen go get your dad!”

Jared puts the DVD on and stands behind the couch with Chad as Donna and Alan sit down, Jensen also standing by the couch. Donna and Alan are very emotional as they watch it, wondering why Brock has never told them about it. Jared feels his own eyes welling up as he watches Brock, it saddens him to see his friend’s smile, knowing it’s gone forever. He feels Jensen’s eyes on him but ignores him.

*

Later Jared is on his way to his room but it still worried about Alan and Donna, it was clearly a hard day for them, combined with the guilt they must still feel about missing so much of Brock’s life during the past few years. He doesn’t want to bother them, so he makes a decision that he knows could go very wrong.

He knocks on Jensen’s door, and when the man tells him to get in, he does. Jared stands in the doorway and expects Jensen to be rude to him, but instead finds him lying down on his bed on his side, wearing only shorts, and staring at a random spot, lost in thought. There’s anguish on his face and it hurts Jared to see it. Jensen’s gaze slowly travels to Jared, who clears his throat.

“Sorry Jensen, I--I just wanted to know how your parents are doing. They were very upset earlier.”

Jensen shrugs with one shoulder. “They are going to be okay.”

Jared just nods and feels he should leave Jensen alone. But as he makes a motion to go away, Jensen surprises him.

“Do you see these pictures?”

Jared frowns and follows Jensen’s gaze, which is fixed on a spot next to Jared on the wall. So Jared walks into the room and turns to the wall, noticing for the first time a huge portion of it is covered by random pictures.

“Yeah.”

“I took them.”

Jared instantly smiles as he studies the pictures. They are all so beautiful, he can feel the sentiment behind each of them. He turns back to Jensen.

“Really? I thought they were artistic pictures.”

Jensen chuckles. “They are. Well… that was the intention at least.”

Jared puts a hand on his face, feeling his cheeks warming up. “Oh man, that came out wrong but it was a compliment, I swear.” Jared looks at the pictures once more and then back at Jensen. “Wow. I knew you were a model but didn’t know you were a photographer.”

“Well, I was in front of the cameras but realized I wanted to be looking through the lense instead.”

Jared is quiet for a while, deciding what he should say so he won’t make Jensen mad again. “Well… that says a lot about you.”

Jensen raises an eyebrow. “Oh really? How so?”

Jared paces around the room. “Well, you think you make decisions, but the decisions are made for you. You think you are the one deciding but end up being hostage to other people’s decisions.” Jensen stares at him with an unreadable look on his face, and Jared chuckles. “And the worst thing is, I actually identify with you in all of this. I’m pretty much the same.”

Jensen sits up on the bed and smirks. “Maybe that’s why we don’t get along.”

Jared shakes his head. “Nah, that’s not the only reason.” He walks to the wall and smiles, turning to Jensen again. “But I’ll admit it. You’re very talented.”

Jensen actually gives Jared a small smile, and his heart suddenly skips a beat. He inspects the wall. “You know what I see here? All of these beautiful pictures here were your decision. It’s a shame you let go of this.”

Jared gives Jensen a sad smile and leaves the room.

_ **Jensen** _

It’s like something has changed inside Jensen overnight. It took him a long time to fall asleep after Jared left his room. In fact, he was already feeling sick of everything even before Jared showed up. He had been lying in bed, listening to Jeff’s voice message saying he wanted to go try out a new Japanese restaurant in town that critics were saying it was pretty good, and then Danneel sent him a video of her visiting the wedding venue. It all felt so… unimportant, all of a sudden. Jensen was having a hard time coming to terms with what he was feeling, and then came Jared and strangely enough, he felt like a breath of fresh air. For a reason not even Jensen himself can explain, he felt like talking to Jared about his photographs. He was afraid Jared would mock him, but the man just said he liked them. That brought a strange warmth to his insides.

Jensen drags himself to the agency in the morning, and the first thing that Jeff speaks about is Jared and how he dared to call Danneel to Jensen’s house the other night.

Jensen sighs, leaning against the edge of his desk and crossing his arms in front of him. “Come on Jeff, you’re still thinking about this? It’s over already!”

Jeff shakes his head as he paces around the room. “I just can’t shake off the feeling that he planned this very carefully. To me this is only the tip of the iceberg.” He lifts an eyebrow at Jensen. “I wonder if he knows about us. Does he knows about us, Jensen?”

Jensen’s stomach sinks, he should tell Jeff that Jared indeed found out but suddenly he realizes he doesn’t want to share this with Jeff. So he shakes his head, scoffing. “How would he know about us, Jeff? There’s no way! Let this go already, please!”

Jeff sighs and walks to Jensen, planting a kiss on his neck. “Alright. What do you say we hit that Japanese restaurant I told you about tonight, huh?”

Jensen feels so tired. In a normal day, the old Jensen would jump on the opportunity to go out with Jeff, would crave his company, especially on a date, which is not something they do very often. But surprisingly, tonight Jensen doesn’t want to. For a reason not even Jensen can explain very well. So he makes something up.

“Sorry, I can’t. I have dinner plans with Danni tonight. Maybe some other day.”

Jensen ignores the look on Jeff’s face.

*

Later Jensen finally arrives home, something he was actually eager to do all day. Danneel had called him to ask if he wanted to do something tonight, but Jensen made up a story about how he had to go to dinner with some clients from the agency. All he really wants is a quiet night.

So Jensen takes a long shower and dresses up in sweatpants and a t-shirt. He rummages inside his closet until he finds what he is looking for, it’s a surprise he still has it since he hasn’t played in so many years. Jensen gathers courage and walks over Jared’s room. He isn’t sure why he is even here, he just has a_ feeling_. He knocks on the door and steps inside when Jared’s voice tells him to.

Jared is sitting on his bed, watching TV, and looks up at Jensen in surprise. “Hey.”

Jensen gives him a nervous smile as he walks into the room, scratching the back of his head. “Hey Jared… you know, I was wondering. Have you ever played The Game of Life?”

Jared frowns and gives him a puzzled look. “Well, that is a deep question.”

Jensen replays what he said in his head and chuckles, shaking his head. “No, not like that!” He shows Jared the board game he had been holding on his side. “I meant the board game. The Game of Life.”

Jared suddenly laughs, looking amused, and Jensen can’t help but watch him. He has never heard Jared laughing for real like this, and it’s a good sound, he decides.

When Jared stops laughing, he looks at Jensen. “What brought this on?”

Jensen shrugs. “Well, it’s not a truce. I want you to know I’m very competitive.”

Jared’s eyebrows raise. “Oh really?”

“Are you in or not?”

Jared sits up straighter on the bed and pats the mattress. “Oh you’re so on, Ackles!”

Half an hour later Jensen is lying sideways on the bed, mourning. Jared just crushed him in the first match.

“I am a millionaire!” Jared is throwing the fake money bills on the air and smiling, and Jensen can’t help but smile along.

“That was beginner’s luck!”

“Beginner’s luck my ass! Good luck raising all of your kids when you’re bankrupt!”

Jensen sits back up and speaks without thinking. “Well, at least in the game I’m having kids.”

Jared studies him, cocking his head to the side. “Why? You and Danneel aren’t planning on having kids?” Jared suddenly brings both hands to his mouth and his eyes widen. “Oh my God! You can’t have kids? Is that it?”

Jensen chuckles. “Nah, it’s not that. I mean, as far as I know, I can have children alright. It’s just… I don’t know if Danneel wants kids or not. I’m not sure she would want to ‘ruin’ her perfect body like that.”

Jared frowns, and probably without even realizing, he brings a hand to his stomach. “Well, that’s sad.” Silence hangs between them for a few moments before Jared speaks again. “What about you? Do you want children?”

Jensen bites the inside of his cheek as he considers the question. “I dunno. Never thought about it, never saw myself as a father. Maybe someday. We’ll see.”

Jared smiles at him, but it has a sad touch to it. “I always knew I wanted to be a dad. Ever since I learned I was a carrier, I knew I wanted to carry a child someday. Never thought it would be under these circumstances though. I thought it would be when I was older, already married, with someone… someone I loved. Who loved me.”

Jared sighs and Jensen looks at him, his chest suddenly tight. He wants to ask, wants to know more about Jared. But out of the blue his phone rings and he fishes it out of his pocket, reading the name on the screen.

“It’s Jeff.”

Jared gives him a sad look. “Aren’t you gonna take that?”

Jensen suddenly makes a decision and declines the call, putting the phone back in his pocket. “No.”

Jared frowns. “Why not?”

Jensen lifts an eyebrow. “Because I want a rematch.”

When Jared smiles, showing him dimples for the first time, Jensen knows he made the right decision.

**TO BE CONTINUED...**


	8. Chapter 8

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> omg guyyysssss!!!! We've finally reached one of my favorite chapters, I've been dying to post it! I know some of you liked chapter 7, I hope you like this one even more because I sure do! There are two scenes in this chapter that are among my favorites! I truly would love to hear your thoughts on this one because I'm so excited about it! I Hope you guys love it! on this chapter I'm gonna quote a song from Beauty and The Beast:
> 
> _"It's so peculiar, wait and see, we'll wait and see a few days more,_   
_There may be something there that wasn't there before."_   


_**Jensen** _

Reality comes crashing down the next morning. Jensen arrives at the agency and Jeff looks pissed.

“Why did you lie to me yesterday?”

Jensen raises his eyebrows at Jeff. “Well, good morning to you too. And what are you talking about?”

Jensen sits down on his chair and Jeff leans down in front of him, placing both palms on Jensen’s desk. “I called Danneel last night because you turned off your phone. She said you weren’t with her.”

Jensen’s jaw drops. “You called Danneel? What the fuck, Jeff?”

“Well, when you disappear like this I want to know where you are, alright! I was worried! Who did you go out with?”

Jensen lets out a breath. “Nobody. I stayed home last night, Jeff. I was tired and I wanted a quiet night.”

Jensen of course leaves out the part where he and Jared stayed up late playing countless matches, and how much better he slept after it.

“Well, if you wanted a quiet night you should just have told me, Jensen! Since when do we lie to each other like this? I would have understood if you wanted to just stay at home!”

Jensen leans back in his chair, pinching the bridge of his nose, suddenly feeling guilty. “You’re right. I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have lied to you like this. We can go to that Japanese place whenever you want”

Jeff deflates as well. “Yeah, okay. Just don’t lie to me like this again, Jensen. This is not who we are.”

Jensen can’t concentrate much on his job throughout the rest of the day, too many things going on inside his mind. Danneel calls eventually and asks if Jensen wants to go out to dinner tonight, and Jensen doesn’t feel too excited about it.

“You want to have dinner tonight? I just think that…”

But Jensen can’t finish what he’s about to say because Jeff grabs the phone from his hand.

“Hey Danni! Yeah, Jensen is going. He has been so busy lately, it’s gonna do him good to go out with you for a bit.”

Jensen mouths a _what the fuck_ to Jeff, pissed that the man is making decisions for him, but in the end he acquiesces. He _should_ be excited with the prospect of seeing his fianceé tonight right? So that’s what Jensen tells himself.

*

Jensen goes back home for a shower and a change of clothes before picking up Danneel for dinner. He nearly bumps into Jared on the way to his room, as he steps out of his own room.

“Hey, Jared.”

“Oh, hey Jensen. In a hurry?”

Jensen shrugs. “Going out with Danneel for dinner tonight. I kinda dumped her last night, remember? I need to do my fianceé duty and then I’ll come back home.”

Jared raises both eyebrows. “Wow, you look so excited! What’s with the rush about coming back home, though?”

Jensen studies Jared for a few moments, feeling confused with what he’s feeling inside. “Well, I could for sure play a few more games so I can get my score higher. You beat the hell out of me last night!”

Jared suddenly smiles at him, and there are the dimples again. Damn. “Well, whenever you feel like getting your ass kicked, you know where to find me!”

Jensen chuckles and points a finger at him. “Expect to get _your _ass kicked this time, Padalecki. See you later!”

*

Dinner with Danneel is spent with her gushing about all the wedding details as usual, and Jensen couldn’t be more bored. He tells himself he should be more excited about this whole thing, but can’t bring himself to care enough.

As Jensen drops Danneel at her place and prepares to go home, Jeff calls. He has his seductive voice on, and invites Jensen over to his place, says he has a nice hot tub waiting for him. Jensen, being the weak fucker he is, can’t say no to Jeff. He never could. He will just be home a bit later than he was supposed to, it’s okay.

He ends up staying over for the night.

** _Jared_ **

_11:48 pm_

Jared checks the time on his phone for the hundredth time, and also for the hundredth time he walks to the window to see if maybe he spots Jensen’s car arriving.

It’s still not there. Jared sighs.

Jensen had promised he would only go to dinner with Danneel and then come back so they could play some more. He left before seven. Jared wonders what could be taking so long. Then Jared asks himself why he cares so much. As far as he knows, Jensen and him don’t get along, Jensen thinks he’s a liar and Jared can’t respect Jensen for cheating on Danneel. But it’s just that yesterday… it was nice. More than nice, actually. Jensen had surprised Jared by coming to his room with a board game, and Jared hadn’t felt so carefree in such a long time. It’s hard for him to admit, but he was looking forward to another round with Jensen tonight.

Maybe he’s still coming. Maybe he got delayed, maybe Danneel wanted to go see a movie after dinner. He will be back soon.

Jared checks the window again before walking back to the bed and putting on another movie, the feeling of frustration very present in him. He falls asleep halfway through the movie, and Jensen never comes.

*

In the morning, Jared is changing out of his pajamas when Chad enters his room, looking anxious.

“What’s up, Chad?”

“Donna isn’t feeling very well, Jare. She’s running a fever and Mr. Ackles is very nervous.”

Jared’s heart skips a beat and he rushes to Donna’s room with Chad. Arriving there he finds Donna lying on her bed, a distressed look on her face, and Alan standing by her side.

“Hey, how is she doing?”

Alan turns to Jared. “Her fever is quite high, I don’t know what the problem is. I’ve called her doctor, he will be here soon. Hopefully it’s just a side effect from the chemo since she had a session yesterday.” Jared realizes Alan is also trying to reassure himself, and nods. He goes on. “Jensen, he… well, he didn’t spend the night at home. Do you think you could call him and let him know what is going on?”

Jared swallows hard and tries to hide his disappointment at hearing Jensen really didn’t come back last night. He gives Alan a short smile. “Yeah, sure.”

Jared goes back to his room and grabs his phone, finding Jensen’s contact and calling him.

“_Hello?_” Jensen’s voice is lazy, as if he had just woken up moments ago.

“Hello, Jensen. It’s Jared.”

Jensen’s voice is instantly more alert. _“Jared? What’s up?”_

“Your mom is not feeling well. She woke up with a fever and your dad asked me to call you.”

_“Shit. I’m going home right now. Be there soon.”_

“Okay, bye.”

Jared disconnects the call and tries to push down the hurt he is feeling and can’t even tell where it’s coming from. Jared can’t demand anything from Jensen, he has every right to go out and spend the night somewhere else if he wants to. He doesn’t owe Jared anything. It’s okay.

It’s _okay_.

Jensen arrives once the doctor has examined Donna and is telling them it’s nothing to worry about for now, he has given her medication and they are supposed to keep an eye on her and monitor the fever. He also tells them that Donna needs to rest as much as possible to recover fully.

Alan thanks the doctor and follows him to the door, and Jensen turns to Jared.

“Well… thank you for calling me.”

“Your dad asked me to. I’m sure you would appreciate knowing what was going on.”

Jared makes a motion to walk away to go to his room, but Jensen stops him with a hand on his arm.

“Listen, Jared… I’m sorry about last night. I know I said I was coming back, I really was, but then I ended up going to Jeff’s place and lost track of time.”

There’s a sudden pang in Jared’s heart, but he plasters a smile on his face and shrugs.

“It’s okay, Jensen. I went to bed early anyway. Was too tired to play like that again.”

Jared walks upstairs before Jensen can see the lie on his face.

*

The next morning Donna is feeling better already, fever is gone, and she has breakfast with all of them at the table. Jared is happy about that and also because today he’s having another ultrasound done to see his baby’s progress again. He can’t wait.

Jensen is sitting across from him but he avoids his gaze, focusing on talking to Chad and Donna instead.

“Jared, is your appointment today?” Donna asks and Jared nods.

“Yeah, in just over an hour actually.”

“Oh my God, I’d love to go with you!”

“You can’t honey, you’re still too weak,” Alan tells her.

Donna nods, knowing her husband is right. “Can you go with him Chad?”

Chad shakes his head. “Sorry, I wish I could. But I have a photoshoot at the agency and I have to be there to get the models ready.”

“Donna, I can go by myself, it’s okay.” Jared offers, but Donna is having none of it and turns to Jensen.

“Son, why don’t you take Jared?”

Jensen looks at Donna and his eyes widen. “Me?”

Jared tries again, feeling Jensen’s awkwardness. “Donna, it’s really okay. I don’t mind going alone.”

Donna just tsks. “No way, it’s my grandchild we are talking about. You were there by yourself the first time and I agreed with it but now I’d like for you to have someone with you. Jensen please. Can you take Jared?”

Jensen finally looks at Jared and nods, giving him a small smile. “Yeah, sure. I’ll take Jared.”

Later as Jared gets in Jensen’s car he feels uncomfortable, as if Jensen is only doing that out of obligation. He hates being a burden.

Jared gives Jensen the address to the clinic and they ride in silence, Jared doesn’t really know what to say and Jensen also keeps quiet. When they approach the building Jared finally speaks.

“You don’t need to come, Jensen. It’s okay. Just drop me off and go to the agency, I won’t tell your mom. I promise.”

Jensen gives Jared a considering look. “No, I’m coming with you.” It holds no room for argument so Jared doesn’t reply.

Jensen parks the car and they make their way inside. They sit in the waiting room until the receptionist calls Jared’s name, saying the doctor is ready for him. Jared turns to Jensen.

“Do you want to come?” Jared doesn’t know why he sounds so hopeful.

Jensen gives him a small smile. “Sure.”

The doctor welcomes them and tells Jared to go to the other room to change into a gown and tells him to lie on the bed for the ultrasound. When he is ready, the doctor and Jensen enter the room. Jensen stays by the door looking shy and out of place, but Jared gives him a smile, hoping he knows he is not unwelcome. The doctor takes Jared’s blood pressure and asks a few questions, and then lifts Jared’s gown. Jared smiles at the tiny swell in there, it just appeared a little while ago. Proof that his baby is growing inside him.

Jared looks at Jensen and catches him checking his watch. Jared feels guilty. “Jensen, if you need to go to the agency, just go. It’s okay.’

Jensen shakes his head. “No, don’t worry about it. Just thought it would go a bit quicker, that’s all.”

The doctor looks at him. “Just wait a bit more. I promise you won’t regret it.” She rubs the cold gel on his stomach and places the wand on it, the heartbeat sound echoing in the room.

“Looks like you have a healthy baby growing in there. Heartbeat is good and strong.”

Jared smiles, feeling emotional. He looks at Jensen, who also has a smile on his face. The doctor turns to him.

“Doesn’t the father want to come closer and take a look too?”

Jared gives her a nervous smile. “He isn’t the father.”

She lifts an eyebrow. “Well, if he is here then he’s someone important nonetheless. Come over here.”

Jensen slowly approaches them and looks at the screen, a smile spreading across his face. “Whoa. It’s hard to see but… is this the hand?” He points to a random spot on the screen and the doctor smiles.

“Yes it is. It has five fingers as you can see.”

“Can… can you tell the gender?” Jensen asks, and suddenly realizes he probably shouldn’t be asking these kinds of questions, as if it isn’t his place to.

Jared smiles at him, letting him know it’s okay. He turns to the doctor. “Can you?”

The doctor studies the image for a while, and smiles at Jared. “For sure. You are having a beautiful little girl.”

Tears explode from Jared’s eyes as he hears that. He is having a _girl._ Not that he would be less happy with a boy. It just means it’s becoming more real, he’s not just having a baby, he is having a _baby girl_. Jared looks at Jensen and realizes his eyes are also suspiciously wet.

“It’s a girl, Jensen!”

Jensen smiles down at him and takes Jared’s hand, squeezing tight and caressing his fingers with his thumb. Jared feels warmth spreading through his body, and he smiles back at Jensen as they share an intense moment that goes beyond words. Jared hasn’t felt this happy in a long time and just can’t ignore that part of it is because Jensen is here with him.

*

A while later, Jared and Jensen walk out of the clinic together, Jared feeling over the moon with happiness, knowing his baby is growing healthy. And even better, knowing that she’s a girl. He turns to Jensen and gives him a smile.

“Can you believe it? Oh my god, there’s a tiny girl growing in me. It was so great hearing her heartbeat again, knowing she’s alive, she’s healthy. I can’t wait to meet her.”

Jared says the last part looking down at his belly, rubbing a gentle hand over it.

“Well, there’s still a while to go,” Jensen says with a fond voice. Jared looks up at him and they share a look. Jensen clears his throat. “What do you say we go for ice cream to celebrate the news?”

Jared feels warm inside again, he really wants to spend time with Jensen but has another idea, and he hopes Jensen is on board.

“Actually, I was wondering… I have been here in Dallas for over a month and I haven’t seen anything, barely left the house. Do you think that maybe… maybe we could do some sightseeing?”

Jensen makes a face and Jared scrunches up his nose, feeling embarrassed.

“Sorry, forget about it. I know you have to go to the agency, it was a dumb idea.”

But Jensen surprises him by shaking his head. “No… it’s okay, actually… yeah. I guess that would be cool. You should see the city indeed, I don’t have anything important at the agency today anyway.” He smiles brightly and Jared can’t help but to return it. “Let’s go see Dallas!”

Jensen takes Jared to see a few places around the city, and also drives aimlessly so Jared can just see the surroundings. Jared loves it, he learns that Dallas is a very nice city and he feels more at home somehow. Plus, Jensen is a great tour guide and Jared realizes he enjoys spending time with him. Jared was dreading it would be kind of awkward given their history, but it is surprisingly easy.

The last place Jensen takes Jared to, is the Botanical Gardens. Jensen had timidly said he saved the best for last and Jared can see why.

“Oh my God Jensen, it’s gorgeous!” Jared takes a look around and is amazed with the place. It instantly becomes his new favorite place in the city, he already feels at peace here.

Jensen smiles at him. “I love it here. It’s where I come when I want to take a break, you know? When I need some time to think. And you know… I think I have never thought so much about things as I’ve done lately.”

Jared raises an eyebrow as they slowly walk side by side. “I can imagine.”

They stop at a tree, one on each side of it, and Jared places a hand on it as Jensen speaks.

“Especially now, with this whole engagement, the marriage thing. You know what’s funny? My parents have always loved each other so much…” Jensen places both hands in his pockets and shrugs. “I don’t think I have this ability. It’s not that I don’t like Danneel. I just don’t think I’ll ever be able to really fall in love with someone.”

Jared just stares at Jensen for a few moments, dumbstruck with what he just heard. He would never expect to hear something like that coming from him, for Jensen to be so open. Jared leans against the tree, closer to Jensen, and looks at him.

“Yeah… it takes courage to fall in love.”

Jensen gives Jared a sad smile. “Well, courage has never been my forte, I think. But I’d consider myself happy if I could love someone for real someday.”

Jared laughs nervously, but when he looks at Jensen again, he has a serious look on his face, just now having realized something.

“The thing with love, is that it isn’t a package that comes all ready for use, you know? It’s not like those things we see in movies, that people just look at each other once…” Jared loses track of what he’s saying when he looks into Jensen’s eyes and realizes he’s staring deeply at him, with those green eyes of his, and Jared just stares back for a moment. He clears his throat and tries to concentrate again. “...and it’s love at first sight, you know? It’s not like that. You need to build love. It takes effort, day by day, brick by brick.”

Jared realizes Jensen has gotten closer to him somehow, and is smiling at him. “You say it like you know what you’re talking about. Have you ever loved someone?”

Jared feels the familiar pang in his heart. Logically he knows he shouldn’t be letting his guard down with Jensen like this, but something in Jared tells him to trust Jensen. So he does.

“Yeah, I have.” He says it with a wistful smile on his face.

“Still do?” Jensen asks softly, but suddenly Jared doesn’t want to answer it. He doesn’t know the answer himself. Jared looks down, shrugging, and Jensen notices his discomfort, lifting his palms in front of him. “Okay, sorry. Forget what I asked!”

Jared chuckles and crosses his arms in front of him. “Let’s just say that in my case, the bricks were made of sand. And when the first storm came, everything was destroyed. All the effort I put into building it… poof.”

Jensen purses his lips. “Are you talking about the father of your baby?”

Jared nods, looking down, feeling his eyes welling up.

Jensen leans closer, using a hand to support himself against the tree. “Jared, does he know about this baby?”

Jared pushes away from the tree, shaking his head. “No, he doesn’t. And he will never know.” He wipes the couple of tears that fall down his face. “But it’s okay, Jensen. It’s okay. It’s not the first or the last baby to grow up without a father. Or a second father. What matters to me today is that my girl will be very, very loved. That’s enough.”

Jensen smiles at him, and luckily decides it’s enough sharing and caring for a day. He makes a motion with his head.

“Want to go get some ice cream and go see more of the garden?”

Jared nods, relieved. “Definitely.”

*

Jensen takes Jared to a hole in the wall for dinner. It’s really nothing special, a bunch of tables crammed together, dark walls and it doesn’t even seem very clean. But Jensen is excited.

“This is one of my favorite places, Jared! Actually scratch that, it_ is _my favorite. They serve the absolute best steak in town. My friend Chris introduced me to this place, he’s spending some time working in Vancouver now, so it has been a long time since I’ve been here. Danneel doesn’t like it, she says it’s not sanitary. I hope you don’t mind it, just wanted to show you my favorite place.”

Jensen suddenly seems shy, as if he isn’t sure if Jared will like it, but he smiles. “Are you kidding? These are my favorite kinds of places. I don’t like fancy stuff. These run down places always hide the best stuff.”

Jensen gives Jared a megawatt smile, and Jared returns it.

When Jared takes the first bite on his steak, he is taken back to the past. “Oh my God, Jensen!” Jared says around a mouthful of food. “This tastes just like the steak my grandma used to make! It’s the same seasoning, holy crap!”

Jared feels emotional, he can almost taste his childhood and he misses his grandma. “You know… we didn’t have much money, so it was not often that we could have a good steak like this. But whenever she had a chance to buy it, oh my god, I was so happy! She could cook it like nobody else. If I could name a taste from my childhood, it would be this.”

Jensen looks at Jared for a long time, his head slightly cocked to one side, an unreadable look on his face. “I think mine would be… the scent of a brand new car. When I was a kid, my dad would get a new car every year and he always took me and Brock to the first ride. To this day, whenever I smell a new car, it makes me feel…”

Jensen trails off and Jared finishes for him. “Warm inside.”

Jensen smiles. “Yeah. Warm inside. It’s funny how it’s something so silly, and yet I have never talked to anyone about this.” Jensen sighs and leans back in his chair. “Why don’t people talk about these silly things?”

Jared gives him a pointed look. “Maybe they want to… they just don’t have anyone to talk to.”

Jared goes back to his steak, but Jensen keeps watching him with an odd look on his face for a while before he starts eating again.

_ **Jensen** _

Jensen feels something different as he lies in bed that night, after coming home with Jared. It’s hard to put a finger on it. It’s like he feels… lighter? He hasn’t had a simple day like this in so long, always worried about the agency, and Jeff, and the wedding, and everything. First it was so surprisingly emotional to share that moment with Jared, when he learned the baby is a girl. He had never felt attached to this baby, but that moment changed things for Jensen somehow. Now he is starting to get excited to see the little girl’s face. He wonders if she will look like Jared. Jensen hopes she has his eyes.

Just spending the day with Jared was incredible. It’s hard for Jensen to wrap his mind around it, he had such strong negative feelings against Jared, he always gave him a hard time, but now… now, getting to know Jared just a bit better, having a small glimpse of who he is, has shifted something in Jensen. He is trying to deny it, but he is beginning to crave Jared’s company. It feels good to be with him. Perhaps they can be friends? Well, that’s much better than them hating each other.

The next day at the agency, Jeff wants to know why Jensen spent the day away yesterday and Jensen tells him.

“Oh, so you spent the day with Jared? How cute! So you’ve changed your mind about him now?” Jeff has an eyebrow raised while looking at Jensen from his desk.

“My mom asked me to take Jared to the appointment. Then he wanted to go see some of the town, that was it. We didn’t have any meetings or anything so I took the day off, which I never do. I think I have the right, don’t I?”

Jeff purses his lips. “Sure you do. It just baffles me how close you’ve gotten to him. You’re even playing happy family with him, going to doctor’s appointments and everything!”

Jensen has had enough. “Look Jeff, my mom asked me to. I’m not in the mood to deal with silly jealousy right now okay? It has always worked between us because it’s easy, there’s no demands or anything. Don’t start now please because I won’t take this.”

Jeff sighs and gets up, walking to Jensen and wrapping his arms around him. “I’m sorry. I got carried away, you’re right.”

Jensen scoffs but hugs him back.

*

Jensen ends up going to dinner with Danneel, at a fancy restaurant she loves. Jensen hates the food here, he isn’t a fan of those fancy-ass small portions that look like a little work of art instead of real food. He thinks back to the hole in the wall where he and Jared had steak the other day.

“...person to do my make up.” Danneel is saying but Jensen has no idea what she is talking about, too lost in thoughts.

“Hey Danni…” Jensen touches her forearm and smiles fondly at her. “Do you have any good memories of your childhood?”

Danneel frowns at him. “What?”

“Well… I don’t know, was just thinking… do you have something that brings back memories of when you were a child? Like a favorite toy, or a favorite place? A taste, a smell? Something? Something that takes you back to another time? To fond memories?”

Danneel scrunches up her face, looking at Jensen as if he has grown two heads. “Honey, are you okay? Why are you suddenly talking like this?”

Jensen sighs, and gives her a small smile. There’s no point in trying to talk to Danneel about stuff like this after all. “It’s nothing, forget about it. What were you talking about?”

Danneel’s eyes widen as she returns to her subject. “Oh my God, how I’m going to have to find someone else to do my make up for the wedding, can you believe that?”

Jensen tries to humor her, but he can’t help feeling disappointed and a bit broken inside.

*

Jensen arrives home after dropping Danneel off at her place. To be honest, he couldn’t _wait_ to come home, for some reason. It’s funny because he has always spent way more time away, but now he feels different.

He wonders where Jared is at, if he’s already in his room. There’s light coming from the kitchen so Jensen heads that way. He finds Jared rummaging in the fridge, singing a song to himself, and Jensen smiles.

“Hey,” he speaks with a soft voice, making Jared startle.

He backs away from the fridge and looks at Jensen, giving him a wide smile. “Hey Jensen! You’re back early!”

Jared seems genuinely happy seeing Jensen back home, and he’s showing his dimples. Jensen knows instantly he has made the right decision.

“Yeah, just went to dinner with Danni. What are you making there?” Jensen makes a motion to the items Jared is holding.

Jared shrugs. “Felt like having grilled cheese sandwiches. Thought I’d make a couple and watch a movie in the living room.”

Jensen’s eyes sparkle at that. “Oh man, I love grilled cheese! Would you mind making a couple extra ones?”

Jared frowns, chuckling. “I thought you said you just had dinner with Danneel?”

Jensen bites his bottom lip. “Well, I did… but she wanted to go to this fancy restaurant with tiny portions and I’m still hungry! They shouldn’t charge so much for such a small amount of food!”

Jared laughs out loud at that, throwing his head back and closing his eyes, and for a moment Jensen feels hypnotized by the sound. It warms his insides.

“Okay, growing boy. I’ll make you a couple of sandwiches too.”

Jensen grins. “Awesome, thanks. By the way, have you chosen a movie yet?”

Jared shakes his head. “No, not yet.”

“Do you mind if I choose one?”

Jared stares at him for a couple of seconds, realizing Jensen just invited himself to spend time with him. Jared gives him a fond smile. “Not at all.”

Jensen ends up choosing Good Will Hunting, and is inserting the DVD into the player as Jared arrives with the sandwiches and asks for Jensen to go grab the Cokes. “Have you watched Good Will Hunting? It’s old but one of my favorite movies.”

Jared shakes his head as he sets the plates on the coffee table. “Never watched it. Can’t wait!”

They settle down side by side to watch the movie, Jensen takes a bite of the sandwich and proclaims it’s the best grilled cheese he has ever had, causing Jared to blush and give him a sheepish smile. Jared ends up engrossed in the movie, but Jensen only pays half attention to it.

*

Next day, Jensen finishes his duties earlier at the agency and rushes out to drive back home, barely giving any attention to Jeff’s annoyed glare. He arrives late afternoon, knowing his dad isn’t home and his mother is out with a friend. Jensen discreetly looks around to find Jared, but the man isn’t anywhere in the house, not even in his room. Feeling mildly disappointed, he ventures outside.

As Jensen steps out to the backyard his breath catches in his throat at the sight in front of him. Jared is sitting on the deck by the pool, wearing faded jeans and a simple white t-shirt. His legs are crossed and he is supporting himself with both arms behind him, his shirt pushed up to his chest, his small baby bump showing. The setting sun bathes him in golden light, making Jared almost… glow. His head is tilted back, his eyes are closed as he takes in the sunlight and warmth, his soft hair shining and stirred by the breeze. Jensen can’t breathe as he watches Jared, he looks like a painting, he looks otherworldly, and so very _beautiful_.

Suddenly Jensen has an idea, and he makes a decision. He quietly backs up to the door and runs as fast as he can to his bedroom, getting his camera, thanking the heavens that the battery is charged, and runs back downstairs just as quickly. He finds Jared in the same position, as if he’s meditating, and Jensen stays partially hidden behind a bush. He turns on the camera and starts snapping pictures of Jared. His favorite pictures are the spontaneous ones, when the person doesn’t have a clue they are being photographed. Jensen craves the perfect moment. And this one happening in front of him, is the most perfect of them all.

After a few moments, Jared opens his eyes and looks down at his belly. He brings a hand to it, caressing it fondly. Jensen can see he is talking to the baby, his voice is too low for him to hear anything. Jared has a beautiful smile on his face as he talks to his baby girl and keeps caressing her. Jensen takes picture after picture, finding hard to believe how lucky he is to be able to witness and capture this precious instant.

Eventually Jensen starts feeling guilty for taking pictures without Jared’s knowledge, he feels like he is intruding a private moment even though the pictures are gorgeous. So Jensen has an idea. He slowly gets away from the bush and approaches Jared.

“Hey,” he speaks in a soft voice as not to startle him.

Jared looks up and smiles when he sees Jensen. “Jensen, hi! Sorry, thought I was alone.”

Jared sits up straighter and Jensen sits down on the edge of one of the lounge chairs. “I just arrived. I saw you here and I had an idea… I would like to make an album of your pregnancy? Like, take pictures of you throughout the months, as your belly grows and changes, so you can show your girl when she is older. What do you think?”

Jensen feels suddenly shy, hoping Jared doesn’t find his idea horrible, and waits as the man studies him.

“So you decided to photograph again, huh?” Jared asks, giving him a smile.

Jensen shrugs. “Well, I made a decision.”

Jared gives him a significant look. “Okay, then. I’d love for you to document my pregnancy. I think it’s gonna be a nice memory to have.”

Jensen gives Jared an impossible wide smile. “Awesome!”

For the next hour or so, Jensen takes countless pictures of Jared, directing him into different poses, making him show off his baby bump. Jensen feels amazing, he is doing what he loves and his model helps a lot. He can see Jared knows how to pose, having modeled before, so it’s not hard at all to do the shots he wants. Once he is done, he shows Jared some of the pictures on the display of the camera, and Jared beams at him.

“Jensen, they look amazing! I told you, you are so talented!”

“Thank you,” he says, feeling himself blushing. Jensen also loves the pictures, but his true favorites are the ones he took when Jared was unaware he was being photographed. Jensen decides not to share those with Jared yet. He is still gonna think about what to do with them, how he’s gonna surprise Jared. He wants it to be special.

Special like Jared himself.

**TO BE CONTINUED...**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I want to send a very special thanks to @freckleNdimple on Twitter, who recently asked me if it was okay to create an art for my story. I only saw that happening to important authors so I couldn't believe it when it happened to me! I said it was okay of course, and the scene chosen was one of my favorites, much to my happiness! This is the result and I'm just over the moon with it, it's just perfect! I can't thank you enough!


	9. Chapter 9

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hey guys! thank you again for reading this story and for your comments on the last chapter! I'm glad you guys enjoyed it, I love it! As i love this one too! The boys are slowly becoming something else... and I love that! So get ready because this chapter is the longest one so far! some important things happening! 
> 
> As usual, if you can please spare a moment to let me know your thoughts!

_**Jensen** _

The third degree starts when Jensen arrives at the agency the next day. He has barely sat down in his chair when Jeff circles his desk and leans against it by his side, arms crossed.

“I want to know what the hell is going on with you.”

Jensen rolls his eyes as he turns his computer on. “This again, Jeff? Jesus Christ, I told you I’m fine.”

“No you’re not. You’re different and that has been going on for a little while now. You were never like this, I know you so well. Actually I know you better than you know yourself, babe.”

Jensen’s eyes widen. “Oh, is that so?”

Jeff nods. “Yes, it is. I know every inch of you and it’s clear that something is not right with you. You seem aloof lately, you don’t seem interested anymore in the things that matter, like your wedding, or the agency. I want to know what the hell is going on.”

Jensen opens his emails on his desktop, starting to check on them so he doesn’t have to look at Jeff. “I’m just tired, I’m stressed, that’s all. Don’t I have the right to feel like this? Do I have to be the poster boy for happiness all the goddamn time?”

Jeff opens his mouth to say something but Jensen doesn’t feel like arguing anymore, especially with Jeff. So he gets up and grabs some papers from his desk.

“We have a meeting starting in ten minutes. I’ll meet you there.”

With that, Jensen gets up from his chair and leaves their office, leaving a stunned Jeff behind.

*

It feels like lately, all Jensen has done is think. Once he started, he hasn’t been able to stop. It’s like Jensen has started looking, really looking at his life for the first time, and he isn’t sure he likes what he sees, who he has become. Although he is still having a hard time putting all the pieces together, it feels like he is missing something about him, some important piece of information about the clusterfuck that has become his life. Jensen hopes he will get there eventually.

Jensen has also thought about Brock a lot lately. He is slowly starting to regret the fact that they’ve grown apart so much, he should have tried harder to keep up their friendship, they used to be so close when they were kids. What changed? What caused them to become strangers who only talked on birthdays or holidays?

Chad opens the door to the boat house with a frown on his face when Jensen knocks.

“Hey Chad… I was wondering if we could have a word?”

Chad’s frown deepens but he walks further inside leaving the door open, and Jensen takes that as an invitation to come inside. So he closes the door behind him as Chad turns around.

“Are you here to badmouth Jared again? Because if you haven’t noticed it yet, I’m his friend.”

Jensen buries his hands in his pockets and shakes his head. “Nah, it’s not that. Actually I wanted to ask you a totally non-Jared related question. I wanted to know what Brock used to say about me.”

Chad’s eyebrows rises. “What? Why do you want to know that?”

Jensen shrugs. “I’ve been thinking a lot about things lately, and I really need to know how Brock used to see me. And please Chad, don’t sugarcoat it.”

“Well, he actually didn’t talk a lot about you or your dad. He used to talk more about Donna.”

“Okay, but he did talk about me. Please, Chad.”

Chad bites his bottom lip for a few moments as he studies Jensen.

“He would say you had become very selfish. That you would only worry about your own things, about your agency and being successful, and you guys grew apart because of that. He felt left out of your adult life because you didn’t have the same interests anymore. He felt sad because of this, sad to lose that childhood closeness with you, that it was a shame things got to that point. Brock felt very disappointed in you.”

Jensen purses his lips, his heart hurting hearing that. He thanks Chad and leaves the boat house lost in thoughts. For the first time, he feels like he failed his brother.

*

“Do you think I’m selfish?” Jensen asks Jeff as they have coffee on the Starbucks across the street from the agency.

Jeff raises an eyebrow. “Why are you suddenly asking that?”

Jensen shrugs, taking a sip of his coffee. "Dunno. I’ve been thinking. Since you know me so well, like you say, what do you think? Am I a selfish person?”

Jeff nods. “Yeah, you are. But I am too, and it’s okay. We are all a little selfish, and that doesn’t make us bad people without feelings. It just means we think of ourselves before thinking about others. I mean, if we don’t care about ourselves, who will? We are on our own first and foremost, babe.”

Jensen doesn’t answer, just thinks all of that over. Jeff finishes his coffee and gives him a pointed look. “What you need to do, is to stop thinking so hard.”

Jensen doesn’t think that’s possible anymore, but doesn’t say it out loud.

*

Jensen arrives home in the late afternoon and finds his mom in the living room. She had a chemo session today so he goes to check on her.

“Hey mom, how are you doing?” Jensen kisses the top of her head and sits down next to her.

Donna smiles at him. “I’m good, son. Just felt a bit nauseous right after the session but I’m fine now. Jared was there with me. That poor boy.”

Jensen frowns, feeling an instant pang in his heart. “Why? What happened to Jared?”

Donna makes a sad face. “Nothing, it’s just that he saw a young couple at the waiting room, the girl was pregnant and her husband or whatever was all over her, showering her with affection. He was hypnotized watching them, I think he really felt the loss of that, not having Brock with him at a moment like this. You know, a girl - or a guy in his case - can get pretty emotional during the pregnancy. Hormones everywhere. Ever since we arrived home he has been in his room.”

Jensen has an inner debate that lasts only a couple of minutes. Before he can stop himself, Jensen walks upstairs and goes to Jared’s room. Without thinking he opens the door quietly, and finds Jared lying on his stomach on his bed, facing away from him, looking at something. Jensen slowly walks closer, and realizes Jared is looking at some pictures of himself with another guy.

“Is he the father of your baby?”

Jared startles and looks over his shoulder with widened eyes. “Oh my God, Jensen!” He hastily jumps up from the bed and throws the photos back into the nightstand drawer.

Jensen realizes what he just did, and suddenly regrets it, placing both hands in front of him as he begins to leave the room. “I’m sorry, I’m sorry. I should have knocked, I know, it’s none of my business, I’ll leave you alone.”

As Jensen reaches the door, he hears Jared’s hoarse voice. “His name is Justin.”

Jensen slowly turns around and finds Jared with his back to him, facing the dresser, his hands curled around the edge. His whole posture is tense, and Jensen feels a sudden urge to comfort him. He tentatively approaches, pausing a couple of feet behind Jared.

“Is he the father?” Jared nods shortly. “Jared… did he know about this child?”

Jared turns around to face Jensen. “No. I mean… I told him.” Jared scratches the back of his neck, clearly nervous. He walks away from Jensen, pacing around the room. “He told me… well, he asked me… he asked me to get an abortion. And then later I told him it had been a false alarm, that it was a mistake. Then we broke up, I decided to leave San Antonio, your brother offered me a ride… and you know the rest.”

“And did you come here to run away from this dude?”

Jared frowns at him. “I’m sorry Jensen, but I don’t feel like getting into certain details with you, okay? All I know is that I don’t want for Justin to know about this baby at all.”

Jensen feels a pang of jealousy of this guy he doesn’t even know but clearly means so much to Jared.

“Well, I guess he must not be all terrible. If the tender way you were looking at your pictures together is anything to go by.”

Jared looks out the window for a few moments. “It’s not him that I miss.” He turns to Jensen and he can see a deep sadness in Jared’s eyes. “I miss myself.”

Jensen realizes he doesn’t like to see this look on Jared’s face, and figures this is enough of talking about his ex-boyfriend. So Jensen approaches Jared and leans against the window frame, facing him.

“You’ve never told me about your parents.”

Jared gives Jensen a fond smile, filled with longing. “I never did because… well, I’ve never met them. You see, they never had a lot of money, but oh boy they loved each other. When my mom got pregnant with me, my dad started working two, sometimes three jobs to have enough money for everything, for the medical bills. Then one night coming home, he fell asleep behind the wheel. He crashed into a tree.”

“What about your mom?” Jensen asks with a frown, his eyes never leaving Jared’s.

“My mom… she was completely in love with my dad. After he died… she fell into a deep depression. And then I was born and it got worse. She ended up dying as well, out of sadness. She couldn’t handle his loss. I was three months old.”

Tears fall down Jared’s face and Jensen feels so much for him, his heart crumbling for Jared’s loss. Jared looks out of the window again and chuckles among the tears.

“That’s why my grandma, the person who raised me, always said I should be careful with love. Because it can either give us the world, or it can take everything from us. That’s why I always tried to be enough for myself, you know Jensen? I had my life, my dreams, I never got attached to anyone until… I met Justin. And after everything I’ve been through with him, I feel like suddenly I’m not enough for myself anymore. I always did so well by myself, and now… now I feel so empty inside, so deeply.” Jared faces Jensen again, his eyes shining. Jensen holds his gaze as Jared goes on. “And I’m so afraid to make the same mistake as my mother. Because I was not reason enough to make her want to live, to go on. I kinda understand what she felt. And I’m so afraid I’m not gonna be a good parent to my child.”

Tears fall down Jared’s face as he says those last words, and Jensen feels his insides shatter. He reaches out and places a gentle hand on Jared’s shoulder. “Of course you will be, Jared. You already love this child more than anything, you are going to be an amazing father to her. I know it.”

Jared gives him a sad smile and backs away, sitting on his bed, Jensen’s arm falling to his side. Jensen follows Jared and sits down beside him.

“I know it sounds stupid Jensen, but… I’ve never felt so vulnerable in my life, you know? I feel like I’ve lost the reins of my life, my direction, my feelings. And that’s fucking scary.”

Jensen feels a tear slip down his own cheek as he gives Jared a sad smile. “If it’s any consolation… I feel vulnerable too.”

“You said you’ve never loved anyone,” Jared points out as he wipes his eyes.

Jensen nods. “I know. But I feel like this nonetheless.”

Jared frowns. “Why is that?”

Jensen shrugs. “I don’t know. I guess this adult life isn’t as easy as I expected.”

Jared chuckles, and offers Jensen a hand, which he takes and holds on tight. “Welcome to the club, then.”

Jensen stays with Jared, keeping him silent company, and it’s surprisingly easy. After learning more about Jared, Jensen feels even more connected to him, a sentiment taking over that it’s hard for him to explain, and he doesn’t think he’s mature enough to understand yet. But he is gonna try, because it feels good. Jensen realizes he wants to be close to Jared. And maybe, just maybe, Jared feels the same.

_ **Jared** _

It’s Christmas time and the whole house is decorated to the nines. Jared always feels nostalgic during holidays, remembering those he used to spend with his grandmother, only the two of them. She would always make french toast on Christmas mornings, which was Jared’s favorite. She taught him how to make it, so every year that’s Jared’s personal tradition. He has spent the last Christmas with Brock and Chad, and his friends also loved his french toast. Jared feels a surge of sadness remembering his friend.

Jared is nervous about the first Christmas with the Ackles. Donna has expressed her desire to have a quiet Christmas, since it’s the first one after Brock passed away. She had asked Alan, Jensen, Chad and Jared for it to be only them this year, and they all had agreed. Jared thought Jensen would argue, ask for Danneel or even Jeff to come at least for Christmas lunch but surprisingly Jensen didn’t say anything. Jared was even under the impression that he was actually _happy_ that it would be only them.

Jared and Jensen had grown closer over the past weeks. What blows Jared’s mind is that everything happened so naturally, neither of them pushed it. At first they were constantly arguing, barely managing to spend five minutes together without it blowing up, and then suddenly… it got easier. Jared can’t tell exactly when or how things shifted, but now he craves Jensen’s company even if he won’t admit it, not even to himself most of the time. Jared learned he actually feels good when he’s with Jensen. Maybe he isn’t the asshole he seemed to be. Jared took a leap of faith when he trusted Jensen with his secret, when he told him about Justin.

He was feeling down that day after seeing that couple at the clinic, he felt sad and nostalgic, and suddenly Jensen was there. His heart told him to trust Jensen and he wasn’t disappointed. Jensen listened to Jared, he could see the other man getting emotional, and they connected on a deeper level. Things changed even more between them after that day and it makes Jared happy. He knows he needs to be careful though, Jensen has quite a lot of baggage, and Jared doesn’t want to get in the middle of all of this. He especially doesn’t want to meddle with Jeff, Jared has a feeling the guy could be quite dangerous.

Jared does some Christmas shopping, he gets some things for Donna, Alan, Chad and even a little something for Danneel. He doesn’t get anything big for them since he doesn’t want to spend too much money - he is using his own money for this. All he needs now is something for Jensen. But no matter how much Jared searches, he can’t find the right thing for him. Jared just wants for it to be… special. He can’t tell why, he just does. Jensen probably won’t even get Jared anything and it’s okay. But Jared wants to give him something, their relationship has evolved so much lately, Jared surely considers Jensen a friend now. And he really wants to give him something… but what?

*

A couple of days later, Jared is at the boathouse with Chad, playing some video games when Chad tells Jared about the conversation he had with Jensen the other day, how Jensen asked Chad what Brock used to say about him.

“He seemed very upset about it after I told him the things Brock said. It’s like he was… disappointed at himself, you know? I could tell he felt like a failure to Brock after hearing my words, I bet he wishes he could change things if possible. Okay, I admit that _maybe_ Jensen isn’t as bad as we thought. Just maybe.”

Jared thinks about this new information for a long time, and he connects it with what Jensen said the other day, how he feels vulnerable too, and maybe this thing with Brock is one of the reasons. Jensen was not close to his brother and maybe he’s starting to really regret it, that’s why he came to Chad on the first place to know what Brock thought of him.

The idea for the _Perfect Christmas Present for Jensen_ hits Jared like a ton of bricks, all he needs to do is to convince his friend.

“Chad, I need you to give me something.”

*

On Christmas Eve they have a nice dinner, everyone makes an effort to bring up the mood since it’s clear Donna is upset because of Brock. Jensen makes sure to have a toast in his brother’s honor and it warms Jared’s heart. Donna also proposes a toast for her granddaughter that is on the way. Then they watch some Christmas movies together, share stories, and overall it’s a good night. Jared eyes his wrapped present for Jensen under the tree and he’s so nervous, he can’t wait. He has decided to give it to Jensen privately, he wants to be just them when Jensen sees it for the first time. And he hopes it’s a good idea, because it took Jared a _lot _of effort to convince Chad to give this to him.

After midnight, they all head to bed, and when Jared reaches his bedroom door Jensen pauses next to him before continuing down the hall to his own.

“Good night, Jared.”

Jared gives Jensen a smile. “Night, Jensen. See you in the morning.”

Jared wakes up early on Christmas morning, too anxious to sleep anymore, and heads to the kitchen. He busies himself for a while making french toast for everyone. By the time the first batch is ready, Jensen enters the kitchen.

“Something smells good.”

Jared looks at him and chuckles. His hair is spiked, there are pillow marks on his face and his eyes are only half opened. “Merry Christmas to you too!”

Jensen smiles. “Oh yeah, Merry Christmas Jared.”

“There’s coffee.”

“You’re the best.”

Jensen goes to get himself a mug of coffee and Jared waits for him to drink some of it.

“Better?”

“Well, now I feel awake.”

Jared gives him an amused smile. “What are you doing up, anyway? I thought you were gonna sleep in today, it’s Christmas.”

Jensen shrugs and wait a second - is he_ blushing? _“I just… well I was. But then I--I smelled something good and I decided to come see what it was.”

Jared shows him the tray. “I’m making french toast.”

Jensen’s eyes widen when he sees those. “Oh my God, you know how to make them? Shut up!! That’s my favorite!”

“Well, it’s my grandma recipe. Want to try one?”

Jared hands the tray to Jensen, who takes one. “Hell yeah!”

Jared waits anxiously as Jensen takes the first bite. He looks at Jared with widened eyes again. “Holy crap, Jared! This is the best french toast on the planet!”

This time it’s Jared who blushes. “Thank you. I used to love when my grandma made those, and she taught me. It’s a tradition, I always make them on Christmas. Chad and Brock loved them. In fact, Brock used to say the same thing you just did. That those were the best he ever had.”

Jensen gives Jared a sad smile at that. “Well, then I think we should have all of those in his honor.”

Jared smiles back. “It’s a deal.”

They eat all the french toast Jared had already prepared, Jensen making obscene noises each time he finishes one, making Jared blush - only with pride.

When they finish, Jensen turns to Jared, licking his fingers. “Want some help making more of those for the rest of the guys?”

Jared nods, smiling. “Yeah, that would be cool. But first…” Jared looks around, trying to listen to some noise of the family waking up. “... do you think your parents will wake up soon?”

Jensen frowns. “I don’t think so, they like to sleep in on Christmas morning and it’s still early. Why?”

Jared purses his lips. “Come with me to the living room, please.”

Jensen cocks his head to the side, puzzled, but goes without argument. Jared is trembling with anxiety and excitement as he bends down to take the package from under the tree. With a deep breath, he hands it to Jensen.

“Merry Christmas.”

Jensen’s eyebrows shoot up and he looks from the present to Jared. “What? Jared, you didn’t need to, well I--”

Jared cuts him off. “I know I didn’t but please take it. I actually wanted to give it to you in private. I wasn’t sure what to get you, and I had this idea… I hope you like it. It’s not anything fancy, but I thought… well, please take it.”

Jensen chuckles nervously and takes the present from Jared’s hand. He carefully unwraps it, finding a simple rectangular box. When he opens it, he sees an old notebook. Jensen picks it up, looking at it curiously. He opens it and reads the first page, Jared looking at it upside down, his hands buried in his pockets.

It reads _The Tales of a Wannabe Writer, by Brock Ackles_

Jensen quickly scans through it and when it dawns on him what this is, his jaw drops. He looks up at Jared with a stunned look on his face. “Oh my God, Jared… is this… is it…”

Jared finishes for him. “It’s a book your brother wrote. He had a few of them. You know how his dream was to be a writer, and he had a few drafts. I knew Chad had brought those with him to Dallas when he moved, and I managed to persuade him to part with one so I could give it to you.” Jared looks at Jensen nervously. “I hope--well, I hope you like it. I thought maybe you would.”

Jensen inspects the notebook a little more, being as careful as he could possibly be, as if he’s holding a precious treasure. He opens his mouth a few times but closes it, as if he can’t find the right words. Finally he looks up at Jared.

“Jared, I don’t know what to say. This is the most perfect present I could ever get. It’s like a piece of Brock in here. This is truly amazing. Thank you. Really, thank you.”

Jensen’s eyes are suspiciously wet, and Jared can tell he really means it. It makes Jared all warm inside to know he was right in giving Jensen this. “I’m glad you like it. It means a lot that you do. Now why don’t you put it away so we can make more french toast?”

Jensen nods, still looking emotional, and he goes upstairs probably to take the notebook to his room. Jared feels ridiculously excited that Jensen loved it so much. When Jensen returns though, he has a gift of his own in his hands.

“This is for you.”

Jared looks at the package in Jensen’s hands and his eyes widen. He really wasn’t expecting a present from Jensen and he feels even more happy that Jensen cared enough to get him something.

Jared takes the gift, extremely curious and excited to know what’s inside. When he opens it, he realizes he’s looking at the back of a photo frame. He turns it around and removes the wrapping paper, revealing a picture of… himself. Jared frowns as he looks at the picture. It’s clearly from that other day when Jensen took some pictures of him for his pregnancy book - which was a very thoughtful idea by the way - but Jared doesn’t remember taking this one in particular. In it, he’s sitting on the deck, a hand on his belly and he’s smiling down at it, the sun shining on him, making his hair glow with an orange light. Jared frowns at the picture and looks up at Jensen, who has his hands in his pockets and is looking nervous, almost like Jared himself a few moments ago.

“Jensen, when did you… I don’t remember this, I mean… you taking this picture that is.”

Jensen blushes even harder. “Well… I actually took that before those other ones you know about. I came home and saw you like this, and you looked…” Jensen clears his throat. “I mean, it was a perfect moment. So I ran to get my camera and snapped some photos of you when you weren’t looking. I love those kinds of photos. They are actually my favorite of all of those we took. I didn’t show you before because I wanted it to be a surprise. I hope you don’t mind me sneaking on you like this. I just… I made a decision.”

Jensen looks at Jared with a hopeful expression on his face as he waits for the verdict. Jared feels his heart growing twice the size, he can’t believe this. Jensen managed to capture the perfect moment, the exact right emotion Jared felt at that moment as he talked to his daughter. Jared can’t help a tear that escapes his eye as he looks up at Jensen.

“It was the best decision you could make. This is perfect, Jensen. Thank you.”

Jensen looks at him and they share a deep moment that doesn’t need words, doesn’t even need a touch. It goes way beyond that. They hold each other’s gaze for what it seems like hours, both with loving smiles on their faces. Jared looks into those deep green eyes, and he could swear he can see Jensen’s soul. Jared feels so many things right now it’s hard to grasp any of them. All he knows is that he could look at Jensen like this forever. The moment is broken when Chad’s voice comes from the back door.

“Jare, is that your famous french toast I smell?”

Jared clears his throat and looks down. “Well, I guess we should get to that if we want to have those ready for brunch.”

Jared puts the framed photo on the corner of the counter facing down, with the wrapping paper on top of it so he can take it to his room later. Together Jared and Jensen get the french toast done, Jared showing Jensen what he needs to do, while Chad sits in the living room to wait.

Jared and Jensen finally carry the trays to the living room and as they settle everything down on the coffee table, Chad chuckles.

“What?” Jared asks, turning his head towards his friend.

Chad points up. “You guys are under a mistletoe, dude. You know what you need to do.”

Jared feels his ears burning as he looks at Jensen, who is looking beet red.

“I--well I mean, we don’t… I…” Jared stutters but a giggling Chad is having none of it.

“Nah. You know the tradition. Kiss up, you two!”

Jared swears to God his heart is beating so hard it’ll jump out of his chest. He looks at Jensen who is slowly closing the distance. Jared swallows hard and turns his face so Jensen can kiss his cheek, which he does. So tenderly. Jensen grabs Jared’s bicep and plants his lips on Jared’s cheek, while Jared closes his eyes. He can smell Jensen all over, he smells so good. It’s not a cologne or anything, Jensen hasn’t even showered yet. It’s just him and it’s good and Jared has chills all over and he wants to…

When Jensen pulls away Jared feels the loss instantly. Jared can still feel Jensen’s lips on him, brings a hand to his cheek and looks down as Jensen turns away, also clearly embarrassed, at a loss for words, but saved by Donna and Alan arriving at the living room, excited about Christmas morning.

The rest of the day goes by uneventfully, but to Jared it all passes by in a blur. Later he brings his presents up to his room and leaves them all on his bed, except for one. He places the framed photo Jensen gave him on his nightstand, close to him, and looks at it for a very long time.

Jared eventually gets up and goes to his dresser to change into his pajamas. That’s when he notices a small paper bag sitting on it. Jared takes it and he knows he has seen it before. It takes a few seconds but it hits him. It’s the present for his baby that Jensen tried giving Jared a while ago and he declined, right after Jared found out Jensen was having an affair with Jeff. Jared takes the bag to his bed and sits on it, he can’t believe Jensen kept it. He reaches inside and pulls out a yellow onesie. It has a baby moose and a baby squirrel on it, and Jared smiles. It’s so cute and tiny, it’s actually the first thing his daughter will ever have. Jared imagines her tiny self in this, and tears up. It’s his baby’s first possession and it was a present from Jensen. It’s perfect.

When he goes to bed that night, Jared can swear he still feels the ghost of Jensen’s lips on his skin.

*

A few days after New Year’s, Jared is in the backyard when Jensen arrives. It has become a recurring thing, Jensen coming home earlier from work. And more often than not, Jared and him hang out. Jared has begun craving for those moments, waiting for Jensen to come home and spend time with him. It’s funny how before they would avoid each other like the plague and now they seek each other’s company to this extent.

Today, as Jared is sitting at a round table by the pool reading, Jensen arrives with a shopping bag and shows him what’s inside with an excited look on his face. Jared can’t help but laugh.

“Dude, you got Monopoly?”

Jensen shrugs. “Well, I couldn’t find mine. You up for it?”

Jared smiles and closes his book. “Of course!”

They play for a couple of hours, and just when Jensen challenges Jared to a rematch, they hear a voice.

“Hey Jensen honey!” Jared turns around and sees Danneel walking excitedly towards them. “I missed you so much!”

When Danneel walks to Jensen and plants a kiss on his lips, Jared looks down. She sits on Jensen’s leg and smiles at Jared. “Hey Jared!”

Jared greets her and Jensen speaks. “Danni, what are you doing here? You didn’t tell me you were coming.”

Danneel opens her purse and fishes out a cellphone. “I would have if you hadn’t forgotten your phone at the agency, silly! I dropped by and Jeff told me I should bring it to you. He also said you would be so happy to see me so here I am!”

Jared can see Jensen pursing his lips, clearly annoyed for some reason. “Oh he did, didn’t he?”

“Yes. Also, your mom invited me over for dinner, said it will be served in about an hour. What are you guys doing?”

“Just playing Monopoly,” Jensen answers dryly. “Want to play?”

Danneel shrugs, looking at the board. “I’ve never played before.”

“You never played Monopoly? You’re kidding right?”

Danneel blushes and Jared decides to end this. “Jensen, why don’t you teach Danneel how to play? I’m sure she will love it.”

Jensen’s eyes widen. “Me? But what about--I mean we were having a rematch!”

Jared smiles sadly at Jensen and gets up, grabbing his book. “Raincheck? I’ll go to my room, leave you guys to it. See you at dinner.”

Maybe Jared imagines the disappointed look on Jensen’s face as he turns to head back inside the house.

*

At dinner, Danneel is talking nonstop about all the wedding preparations, about all the hundred kinds of flowers she picked out, the colors, which flower goes where. She is talking a mile a minute while Jared takes the time to observe Jensen’s pissed look on his face. Before Jared can conclude that this might end bad, Jensen throws the napkin on the table and gets up.

“Danneel I cannot stand you talking about this wedding anymore! It’s like you don’t have anything else to say, you didn’t even play with me so you could talk about this damn wedding and you still won’t stop! Jesus Christ you‘re gonna drive me crazy! I need to get some air!”

With that Jensen storms off the dining room, leaving everyone stunned behind him. Jared looks at Danneel, who is right by his side, and he can see the poor girl is on the verge of tears. Donna gets up from her chair and goes to Danneel’s side. “Danneel, don’t mind him, he didn’t mean any harm, I am sure of it.”

Jared tries to smile at her. “Maybe he’s just nervous about everything.”

Chad chimes in. “It’s normal for the groom to be nervous.”

Danneel pouts, tears streaming down her face. “Yeah, but I am also nervous! And I’m doing everything by myself, he doesn’t help me at all and now he yells at me!”

“You are right girl,” Alan finally speaks. “Jensen has no right to speak to you like this. I’ll go talk to him.” Alan gets up but suddenly Jared makes a decision and gets up as well.

“Lemme go, Mr. Ackles. I think it’s better. I’ll talk to him.”

Without waiting any further, Jared rushes upstairs towards Jensen’s room, finds him sitting on his bed, massaging his temples with his head down. Jared closes the door behind him and leans against the wall close to Jensen.

“Jensen, what happened down there?” Jared asks softly. “What made you react like that?”

Jensen looks up. “I can’t stand Danneel talking about this damn wedding anymore. It’s the only thing she talks about 24/7!”

Jared frowns. “Well but shouldn’t this be a subject as important to you as it is to her? You are the groom, Jensen.”

Jensen exhales. “Yeah, but she starts talking about the church, and the decorations, and the schedule, and the flowers…it’s suffocating Jared, sometimes I feel like screaming.”

“Jensen, nobody is forcing you to marry Danneel. You are the one who wanted to marry her.”

“I know but…” Jensen looks away for a few heartbeats. “I like Danneel. And I know I’m doing the right thing.”

Jared frowns again and walks towards the bed, sitting down next to Jensen and staring at him quizzically. “Doing the right thing? What do you mean?”

“I want to have a family, Jared. I want to have a home, I want to be a father.”

Jared’s eyes widen. “Well, I for sure didn’t know that.”

Jensen chuckles and looks down. “It’s a recent want. And I guess…” Jensen looks at Jared and smiles sheepishly. “I guess you may have influenced me.” Jared smiles and Jensen goes on. “I’m just unsure if I have the right mindset to educate someone on how to live. To be responsible for another life? I can’t even handle myself most times.”

Jared laughs. “Don’t worry about it, Danneel will teach the kid how to use a credit card sooner rather than later.”

Jensen sighs. “That’s what I’m worried about.”

Jared turns serious. “Sorry Jensen, I was just joking. I’m sure Danneel will be a great mom.”

“I wonder if she even _wants _to be a mom.”

Jared studies Jensen for a long moment. “You know, I was never married, but I assume that a marriage with love involved is already hard sometimes… a marriage without love would be impossible to handle. I think the very basics of a relationship is being able to at least talk to the other person.”

Jensen lets out a laugh and Jared follows. When they are done, Jared sighs and stares at Jensen. “Be careful not to hurt Danneel, Jensen. Or yourself. Because that’s what will end up happening if what you feel and what you ‘think it’s right’, are different things. Think about it.”

Jensen looks at Jared with an unreadable expression on his face. “Alright.”

“There’s still time.” When Jensen doesn’t answer, Jared makes a motion with his head. “Now you should go talk to your fiancée.”

Both of them go downstairs and Jensen asks Danneel come out with him to the front porch. Jared sits down on the couch next to Chad, who gives him a weird look but doesn’t say anything, probably because Alan and Donna are in the room with them. They wait in silence, and Jared is strangely nervous about how the conversation is going. It’s almost as if Jared is… hopeful?

But for what? Well, he sure wants for Jensen and Danneel to set things right, after all they are going to get married. And that’s the best thing to happen, right? Jensen was just confused, for sure. He loves Danneel and they are a perfect couple. They will be a very pretty family.

After a while Jensen returns, and Donna gets up. “What happened?”

Jensen purses his lips, looking down. “I apologized to Danneel, it’s alright. She’s gone home.”

“But what happened son? Why did you act like that?”

Jensen shrugs. “Dunno. I’m tired I guess. I’ll go to my room.”

Without looking at anyone else, Jensen runs the stairs up to his bedroom. Soon after Donna claims to be tired as well, and after Chad and Jared get up to wish them good night, Alan takes his wife to their bedroom. Then it’s just the two of them in the living room, and his friend gives him a smile.

“Hey, at least it all ended well, right?”

Jared feels his heart tightening and he sits down on the couch, letting out a sigh and placing his elbows on his knees. “Well… it depends on the point of view.”

Chad raises an eyebrow. “And what is _your _point of view, Jare?”

Jared clears his throat and looks away. “Mine? I have nothing to do with any of this, Chad.”

Chad gives him a pointed look. “Jensen comes back home from work earlier now, he has spent more time in this house than ever. You offer to go talk to him during a crisis. He takes pictures of you now to make an album of you, you guys play board games.”

Jared scoffs. “Chad you are too malicious, you knew that?”

Chad laughs. “I’m not malicious Jare, I just like to observe. And even if you don’t see it, or don’t _want_ to see it, there is something going on there.”

Jared shakes his head. “I’m going to bed, Chad. Everyone has gone nuts today apparently. Good night.”

With that, Jared storms up to his bedroom. As he changes into his pajamas, he goes over Chad’s words in his mind. His friend is insane. Even if there were feelings between Jensen and him, Jensen’s life is too messed up. He’s engaged, he has an affair with Jeff. Jared doesn’t want to be a part of that mess.

He lies down and thinks about his conversation with Jensen as he looks at the picture that Jensen took. Jared imagines Jensen as a father. He would make a great dad.

As Jared is drifting off, in that moment right between consciousness and unconsciousness where thoughts are kind of confusing and you can’t quite grasp them, Jared wishes Jensen were the father of his daughter.

**TO BE CONTINUED...**


	10. Chapter 10

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay guys, this is the last chapter before a small holiday break! I'll be back posting in January, but I'll finish 2019 with a very special chapter, one I have been very excited to post for the longest time. There's a surprise for you guys in it and I have a feeling you will enjoy it. 
> 
> as usual, if you can, spare some time to let me know your thoughts on the chapter!

_**Jensen** _

“Red or white?”

Jensen plops down on Jeff’s couch and lets out a sigh. “Pick whatever you want.”

Jensen feels like he shouldn’t even be here. It’s Friday night, Jensen has spent the day at the agency as usual and Jeff had bugged him to go to dinner afterwards. Jensen was planning on going home once they left the restaurant, but once again Jeff convinced Jensen to come to his apartment. Jensen doesn’t want to stay for long, especially because Jared is alone at the house tonight. His father had taken his mother for a weekend away now that the chemo cycle has ended, claiming Donna needed some quiet time and a small trip would do her good. And Chad was spending the day away at a photoshoot a few towns over, he would be back much later or even the next day depending how late things ran.

Logically Jensen knows Jared is a big boy and can spend a night by himself, but something is bothering Jensen. In the morning Jared had seemed kind of off during breakfast, but perhaps it’s just Jensen imagining things.

Yeah, it has to be that. Jensen needs to stop thinking about Jared so much and allow himself to relax. It’s for his own good.

Jensen hears Jeff pouring wine in the glasses when his phone rings. He checks the screen and realizes it’s Jared. Frowning, Jensen takes the call.

“Jared?”

_“Jensen… hi, sorry to bother but I was wondering… do you--do you know by any chance if there’s a hospital nearby that I can go to?”_

Jensen is on his feet in a second. “Why? Jared, what happened?”

Jared sounds terrified, and Jensen’s heart feels so tight._ “I don’t know, I’ve been feeling some weird cramps on my lower stomach and I’m very cold, but I think I could have a fever… I just want to go and see if everything is okay but I’m not sure where I’m even supposed to go.”_

Jensen runs a hand through his hair. “Stay put Jared, I’ll be right there okay?”

_“What? No, you don’t have to come Jensen, just tell me where--”_

“I’m coming Jared, wait for me. Fifteen minutes tops.”

Jared turns the phone off and he’s already heading to the door when Jeff speaks.

“Jensen where are you going? What happened?”

Jensen barely spares his lover a glance. “Jared is not feeling well, I’m taking him to the hospital.”

Jensen reaches the doorknob but Jeff grabs his bicep. “Jensen, I’m sure it’s nothing. Jared is pregnant, it’s normal to feel odd sometimes. I’m sure he’s overreacting.”

Jensen gives Jeff a cold glare, not believing what he’s hearing, and yanks his arm away. “Bye Jeff. I’ll see you Monday.”

Jensen is in his car and driving to his house in record time. Jared sounded so weak, so terrified. Jensen hopes it’s nothing too serious, he should have listened to his instincts, he should have gone straight home, if something happens to Jared…

Jensen finally arrives and hastily parks the car, running inside. He finds Jared in the living room, leaning against the couch, and rushes to him.

“Jared? What are you feeling?”

Jared looks at Jensen with huge eyes, and he can see how freaked out Jared is. He brings a hand to his lower belly. “It hurts here, I feel weird, I’m scared Jensen.”

Jensen can see tears forming in Jared’s eyes, and his skin is flushed. He reaches out and places a gentle hand on his forehead, wincing.

“Oh God, you’re burning up! Let’s get you to the hospital right now.”

“Jensen, you didn’t have to, I didn’t mean to interrupt…”

Jared is giving Jensen those eyes that make him look like a sad puppy. What is that? Jensen places a hand on Jared’s shoulder. “Stop it. You didn’t interrupt anything. Your health and the baby’s are the most important thing right now. Let’s get going. Do you have your ID?”

Jared nods and grabs his wallet from the couch. Jensen makes sure Jared is all dressed to go and places a hand on his back, guiding him outside. He grabs Jared’s coat from the rack and helps him put it on, then takes him to the car and helps him inside, buckling him up. Taking his place behind the wheel he glances at Jared who is leaning back against the seat, his eyes closed and a hand on his lower stomach. Jensen reaches out and squeezes Jared’s thigh.

“It’s gonna be okay Jared, we will get you to the hospital.”

Jared turns his head and opens his eyes, giving Jensen a tiny smile and a nod. Jensen breaks a few traffic laws driving to the nearest hospital, and thanks God his father included Jared in the insurance. When they arrive Jensen guides Jared in and explains the situation, making sure they know Jared is pregnant. A nurse comes with a wheelchair and Jensen helps Jared into it. The woman takes Jared through some doors and another nurse tells Jensen he needs to wait, and asks him to fill out a form. Jensen doesn’t know much about Jared but does what he can.

Then Jensen spends the next couple of hours pacing around the waiting area, impatient to know what’s going on with Jared. He has called Chad to let him know what’s going on, and the guy has promised to come as fast as possible. Jensen has decided to wait till after he knows what’s going on with Jared to call his parents.

Eventually a doctor comes asking who is here for Jared Padalecki and Jensen jumps. “I am! Please doctor, how is he?”

The doctor offers Jensen a hand. “Hello, I’m doctor Beaver. Are you the father of the baby?”

Jensen’s eyes widen. “Me? I--well, I…”

“Yes he is!” Jensen looks to the side and finds Chad arriving, rushing to Jensen’s side. “Hello doc, I’m a friend of theirs. Jensen here is Jared’s fiancée and the father of his baby. Please tell us how is he?”

Jensen tries to hide his shock at Chad’s words, what the fuck? Thankfully the doctor doesn’t notice. “Well, Mr. Padalecki is suffering from a bladder infection. That’s actually very common during pregnancy, the fetus can put pressure on the bladder and urinary tract and it ends up trapping bacteria. That’s what was causing the cramps and fever.”

Jensen feels his heart beating a mile a minute. “Is he gonna be okay? And the baby?”

“They are gonna be fine. We are treating Jared with IV antibiotics to battle the infection and we are hopeful it will clear up soon. We are gonna keep Jared overnight to monitor him, and if all goes well he may go home sometime tomorrow and continue his treatment with antibiotics at home.”

Jensen lets out a deep breath and nods, looking lost and also relieved. “Okay. Okay, so he’s gonna be fine. Okay.”

Doctor Beaver places a hand on Jensen’s shoulder. “It’s normal for the father to freak out, especially since it’s a new situation. But I promise Jared is being well taken care of. Don’t worry.”

Jensen just nods, finding out he’s not at all bothered with what the doctor said. “Can I stay with him?”

“Yes, if you want to, you can spend the night. A nurse will come get you soon to take you to Mr. Padalecki’s room.”

“Thanks, doc.”

As the doctor leaves, Jensen turns to Chad. “Why the hell did you say I’m the father of Jared’s baby and his fiancée?”

Chad rolls his eyes. “Because he wouldn’t tell us anything if we weren’t related somehow. I just had to go with it.”

Jensen relaxes and nods at Chad. “Yeah, you’re right. Good thinking.”

“You can go home if you want, Jensen. I’ll stay here with Jare until he’s better.”

Jensen’s eyes widen and he shakes his head vehemently. “No, I’m staying. I’m not leaving until I know for sure Jared is okay. You can go Chad, you had a very busy day. I promise I’ll call you if there’s any changes in Jared’s condition.”

Chad frowns at Jensen. “You serious?”

Jensen sighs. “Look, it’s not… it’s not the same okay? I want to stay here, I--I need to. Please.”

Chad studies Jensen for a few moments and finally nods. “Fine. But if anything happens to Jared you call me okay? I don’t care what time.”

Jensen nods back. “I promise.”

Chad leaves and soon a nurse comes to take Jensen to Jared’s room. Jensen is eager to see him and wants to tell the nurse to walk _faster_, but refrains. Finally they arrive and the woman opens the door, allowing Jensen to get inside. He takes a look at Jared lying on the bed, his eyes closed.

“He’s just sleeping,” the nurse tells him. “An infection like this can take a toll on the body, especially since Mr. Padalecki is pregnant. But we have it under control, the fever has gone down a bit and the antibiotics are doing their job. Now all he needs is rest. If his condition doesn’t worsen he gets to go home tomorrow.”

Jensen thanks the nurse and she leaves them alone. Jensen pulls a chair closer to Jared’s bed and sits down, gently taking Jared’s hand and staring at his face for a while. It’s the second time Jensen sees Jared like this, but now it’s so much different. The first time Jared was a complete stranger, a total mystery to Jensen.

And now… what Jared _is_ to him, really? Jensen purses his lips and slowly reaches out with one hand, very gently running his fingers through Jared’s hair as he takes in all his features, the strong jaw, pointed nose, the almond-shaped eyes that have the most beautiful colors when open.

“God, I was so worried Jared.” Jensen says in a whisper, feeling his eyes getting moist remembering how worried he has been, not knowing what was happening to Jared and the baby. Jensen chuckles as he recalls how not long ago he claimed not to want anything to do with Jared and his baby, but now it pains him to be away from Jared for any length of time. What is happening to him?

Jensen thinks about how Chad told the doctor that he was the father of Jared’s baby, and his fiancée. Even though Jensen was shocked he also felt a strange warm contentment inside. For a split second Jensen had imagined himself as both things. And now, looking at Jared like this, after everything they went through… Jensen doesn’t think he finds this idea as ridiculous as he once might have.

Jensen looks at Jared for what seems like hours, caressing his hand with a thumb and playing with a lock of his hair. He feels something so deep, so raw, so fierce. It’s hard to explain because Jensen is sure he has never felt it for anyone ever. Not for Jeff, not for Danni. No, it goes beyond all that. Jensen was ready to hate Jared, but it turned out to be impossible, no matter how hard he tried. And oh boy, he did try. Perhaps it’s time to stop fighting so hard. If only things weren’t so complicated right now.

Jensen’s phone vibrates in his pocket, and he comes out of his trance to fish it out. The screen reads _Jeff_, and Jensen immediately declines the call. It’s only a few seconds later that a message pops up.

_Call me._

It’s out of pure conditioning that Jensen almost hits the call button, but he stops himself. Jeff has always told Jensen what to do and Jensen did, but not tonight. Jensen makes a decision and he turns his phone off.

Tonight Jensen is staying with Jared.

_ **Jared** _

When Jared wakes up it feels as if he was hit by a car. Again. His body hurts, he feels tired. What the fuck happened? He isn’t in his room, that’s for sure. Slowly he remembers he wasn’t feeling so good, then he called Jensen. Damn, Jensen came to take him to the hospital, he shouldn’t have. Jared briefly panics, wondering if his baby girl is fine, but he puts a hand on his baby bump and everything seems fine, he can feel the same swell as before. It must be fine.

Jared turns his head to the side and his heart stops. Jensen is curled up in the armchair next to the bed, sleeping. It’s already morning, which means… did Jensen stay the night? Warmth spreads through Jared’s body at the thought that Jensen cared enough to stay. He could have gone home, but he stayed. With Jared. He can’t help a smile as he looks at Jensen’s serene face. Jared could probably watch him for a long time like this, but the urge to know what’s happening to him wins.

“Jen…” Jared clears his throat as his voice comes out raspy. “Jensen?”

Jensen lets out a hum but only stirs. Jared calls him again and slowly, Jensen opens his eyes. Jared is struck again with how gorgeous those deep green eyes are.

“Hey,” Jared says as Jensen blinks a few times, situating himself. When he finally focuses on Jared’s face Jensen smiles, and he sits up straighter.

“Hey Jared! You’re awake!”

Jared frowns. “What happened? What was wrong with me? Did they figure out?”

Jensen nods. ‘You have a bladder infection, they said it’s common during pregnancies. They have it all under control though, you’re probably gonna be released today.”

Jared lets out a breath. “Okay, so is everything okay with my girl?”

Jensen eyes Jared’s hand on his belly and smiles fondly at him. “Yeah, she’s just fine, don’t worry.”

“Thank you.”

Jensen’s smile widens. “You’re welcome. I’ll go get the nurse now.”

Jared is discharged a couple of hours later, they run some exams and the doctor declares him good to go, with strict orders to take antibiotics at home. Jensen promises the doctor he will make sure Jared does. Chad has arrived earlier with a change of clothes for Jared, and after he’s changed and ready to go Jensen takes him to his car, Chad following them. Jensen makes sure Jared is secure in the passenger seat and Chad sits in the back. As Jensen gets in the car and starts the engine, he glances at Jared.

“You okay?”

Jared smiles. “Great. Ready to get away from the hospital.”

Jensen chuckles. “Home it is then.”

Jensen parks the car on the driveway and as everyone gets out, a puppy comes running towards them, jumping around Jared. His face lights up immediately, he loves dogs, so he bends down to scratch behind the dog’s ear.

“Hey buddy! Aren’t you the cutest thing ever?” Jared knows he sounds ridiculous talking to dogs but he doesn’t care. The puppy licks his hand and Jared starts giggling. It licks even more and Jared laughs loudly. He looks up and sees a woman running up to them, probably the owner. Jared then looks at Jensen and he seems frozen on the spot, eyes glued to Jared and a puzzled frown on his face.

Still smiling, Jared speaks to him. “Jensen, you alright?”

Jensen still stares at Jared for a few seconds before he blinks a few times and shakes his head. “What? Yeah, well. I hmm. I am. Cute puppy.”

The woman comes and gets the puppy, apologizing for the disturbance but Jared reassures her. He says goodbye to his little buddy and they all make their way inside, Jared feeling a bit tired already. They find a nice lunch waiting for them that Loretta prepared, and Jared realizes he’s starving. They all eat together and soon after Jensen makes Jared talk to Donna, letting him know he had to tell Donna what happened. Jared tells her he’s fine, nothing to worry about and no, she doesn’t need to come home earlier.

Jared spends a lazy day with Jensen keeping him company, they watch movies and play games, and then Jensen sends Jared to his room claiming he needs his rest and to call if he needs anything.

Before entering his room though, Jared calls Jensen, who turns around with raised eyebrows. “Just… thank you. For staying with me last night. I really appreciate it.”

Jensen gives Jared a smile. “You’re welcome Jared. Good night.”

There’s something different about Jensen, but Jared can’t put his finger on it. Maybe it’s his imagination. Or maybe it’s Jared hoping there’s something else there. He thinks he must be crazy.

_ **Jensen** _

Jensen is in his bedroom looking at the pictures he took of Jared the other day, having printed them at the agency. It has been a day since Jared came back from the hospital, and Jensen’s parents returned from their mini vacation a couple of hours ago. Donna wanted to know everything that happened to Jared and Jensen told her how Jared had called him, how he was so worried and came running, how he took Jared to the hospital and stayed with him until he was discharged the next day. Jensen couldn’t hide his distress as he told Donna - and Alan who was listening as well - everything. Then they went to check on Jared and Jensen decided to finish working on the pictures.

There’s a knock on his door, and Donna enters. She looks at the pictures scattered on Jensen’s bed.

“What are those photos, son?”

Jensen gives her a small smile. “I took those of Jared. It’s gonna be for the album we are gonna make of his pregnancy.”

Donna lifts her eyebrows and walks closer, sitting at the foot of Jensen’s bed and picking one up. “They are very beautiful. You have a huge talent for photography, Jensen.”

“They’re just amateur pictures, mom. It’s no big deal.” Jensen takes the photo from Donna and starts collecting them all.

“Jensen… is there something going on?” Donna’s tone is odd and Jensen immediately looks at her.

“What do you mean?”

Donna cocks her head to the side, and narrows her eyes. “Are you feeling something… _special_ for Jared?”

Jensen frowns, his heart skipping a beat. “Me? Feeling something special for Jared? I don’t understand.”

“Just the way you’ve gotten so much closer lately. Your reaction to what happened to him, the way you told us. I could feel how stressed you were.”

Jensen swallows hard, trying to come up with a reason for it. “Well… he’s pregnant with Brock’s child. I think it’s natural that I worry, isn’t it?”

Donna smiles and scoots closer to Jensen, reaching out to gently touch his face. “I know Brock’s passing made you more sensible, more caring. I was just afraid that there was a stronger reason for such distress.”

“I’m just worried about my future niece, that’s all.” Jensen looks at Donna, biting the inside of his cheek, and takes a chance. “What if… what if there _was_ a stronger reason? Would it be that bad?”

Donna lifts her eyebrows. “No, it wouldn’t be if you weren’t committed, which you are. And besides, Jared is pregnant with your brother’s child, this wouldn’t be right.”

Jensen sighs, shaking this off. He isn’t sure why he even brought this up, it’s stupid right? And now he knows how his mother feels about it.

“I’m just worried about that child and you, mom. After all, I know how important the baby is to you. I didn’t want for you to suffer anymore.”

Donna smiles tenderly and plants a kiss to Jensen’s forehead. “I like seeing you like this, son. You’re much more loving, more caring.”

Jensen shrugs. “Guess it’s never too late, huh? But you don’t have to worry, there’s nothing there. I’m worried about my niece and nothing else.”

Donna gets up. “Okay then, good to know. Good night Jensen, sleep well.”

Donna exits Jensen’s bedroom, leaving him with a lot to think about. Jensen tries to convince himself he’s really just worried about the baby, after all this is the whole reason they have Jared here.

Jensen isn’t sure he succeeds though.

*

Jensen lets out a deep breath as he listens to Danneel’s rambling on the phone, sitting at his desk. Apparently there has been a problem with the stylist doing her dress, she doesn’t know if it will be ready in time for the wedding, which is twenty days away, and she’s throwing a fit, claiming she doesn’t know what to do because this is apparently a disaster, and Jensen has finally had enough.

“You’re this stressed over a dress? Perhaps we should cancel the whole thing then!”

Danneel starts crying, calling him a monster, and Jensen closes his eyes, pinching the bridge of his nose. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean it Danni. It’s gonna be fine, alright? I promise. Look, I have to go, I’ll talk to you later.”

Jensen throws the phone on the desk and Jeff looks pointedly at him. “Why would you talk to your fiancée like this?”

Jensen raises an eyebrow. “Why? Do you think I was too rude with her?”

“No, I think you treated her like an idiot.”

“Well, she is stressing over an idiot reason.”

“It may be to you, but clearly not to her. How would you suggest that you cancel the wedding? What kind of a stupid joke is that?”

Jensen sighs, feeling exhausted. He gets up from his chair and walks around his desk, leaning against it and crossing his arms. “Perhaps it wasn’t a joke.”

Jeff narrows his eyes. “Excuse me?”

Jensen bites his lips and voices for the first time what has been nagging him for the past few days. “I’m not sure if I want to marry Danneel anymore.”

Jeff frowns, giving Jensen a disbelieving look. “What are you saying? You’re not marrying Danneel anymore?”

“I didn’t say that. I said I’m not sure anymore. I don’t know if this is the right thing to do.”

“Oh and you decided this twenty days before the wedding.”

Jensen scoffs. “You can cancel a wedding even a day before.”

Jeff ges up as well and leans against his own desk, supporting himself on his palms. He narrows his eyes again. “Would you do something like this to Danneel? Knowing how important this is to her?”

Jensen’s eyebrows shoot up. “It’s funny how much you defend her. You, who always bragged about having an affair with her fiancé!”

“It doesn’t mean I don’t care about her.”

A thought strikes Jensen. “What about me? Do you care about _me_, Jeff?”

“What do you mean, Jensen?”

“The fact that I’m about to marry a girl I don’t love doesn’t bother you?”

“And since when this is important to you, Jensen? You were never a romantic guy!”

“I know Jeff, but I’m starting to rethink some things. I’m not sure if the life I lead is the life I want for myself anymore.”

Jeff mirrors Jensen and crosses his arms in front of his chest. “Do you know what this is? You’re a spoiled boy throwing a temper tantrum.”

“No. This is called maturing.”

“What kind of maturing is this? Running over other people’s feelings? You made a commitment to Danneel and her family. Yours, too. You need to honor your commitments.”

Jensen nods slowly. “Even if those make us unhappy.”

“How do you think you’re gonna find happiness Jensen? Following the instincts of your own heart? For the love of god, not even a fifteen year old boy believes this crap, and you’re not a boy anymore. You are a man, so act like one!”

Jensen is feeling more and more disappointed at everything the more he hears Jeff talk. “I have one more question for you, Jeff. What is happiness to you?”

Jeff lifts an eyebrow. “A long word. But if this is what you’re after, happiness isn’t something you find. It’s a process, it’s something you build. Not following the things you want, but having control over them. Think about it.”

Jeff leaves the office and Jensen is left alone with even more on his mind. A headache is forming, it’s just too much to process and Jensen is having a hard time putting together all the pieces. He can’t tell what he’s feeling anymore, everything too confusing. Jensen can’t tell why Jeff wants so much for him to marry Danneel, why he was so pissed with the mere suggestion that the wedding is canceled.

Jensen feels like screaming.

** _Jared_ **

Jared is having breakfast with Donna, Alan and Chad. Thankfully he is feeling better, the antibiotics doing their job of getting rid of the infection. Donna has asked Loretta to cook a nice breakfast, claiming Jared needs to eat to get his strength back. Jared didn’t argue because he sure does enjoy eating.

Alan tells Donna he can’t go with her to the doctor’s appointment today because he needs to go to work. Jared offers to go but Donna tells him he still needs to rest, so Chad ends up offering to go with her. Once Alan leaves, Jensen arrives and sits down in his chair, next to Jared.

“Morning guys,” Jensen says and turns to face him with a smile. “Morning Jared. You feeling better?”

Jared smiles back and nods. “Great, thank you.”

Jensen hands him a large envelope. “I didn’t have the time to develop all of those before, but here you go, all done now. It’s the pictures we took the other day.”

Jared eagerly takes the offered envelope and opens it, taking out large pictures of himself, from the photoshoot they did. Like that first one, they are all incredibly beautiful, and Jared is moved.

“Those are all amazing, Jensen. Seriously.” Jared hands one to Donna and another to Chad, who compliment Jensen as well.

“Son, you’re so talented. You are a great photographer, it’s a shame you chose to go another direction.”

Chad lifts his eyebrows as he hands the picture back to Jared. “Well, it’s never too late to change your mind. You just need to want it.”

Jensen briefly looks at Jared before focusing on Chad. “There’s always time to make new choices, huh?”

Chad smirks. “I think so too.”

*

A couple of days later, Jared is in the living room with Chad, who is telling him about the children’s oncology ward he and Donna visited at the hospital when he took her for the appointment the other day. Chad and Brock used to visit a similar place back in San Antonio, so it touched Chad to be able to visit a similar place with Donna. It touched her as well, knowing how much her son used to love bringing joy to kids like these. Chad tells Jared how they have decided to keep visiting it, in honor of Brock and also for the opportunity to bring some joy to the kids. Jared is telling Chad he wants to go as well next time, when Jensen arrives.

“May I join in?” Jensen asks sitting on an armchair. “Heard you guys talking about Brock and got interested, sorry.”

Jared smiles at Jensen and tells him about the visits to the children with cancer, how they are all planning on going since Donna and Chad started doing it. Jensen returns the smile.

“That’s a great idea, I’m sure Brock would love to know that.”

“I am sure he would,” Chad says as he gets up. “Okay it was a long day and I’ll go take a shower and get some sleep. Good night, you two.”

Chad leaves them and Jared takes a look at Jensen. He seems… odd. Jared can’t tell exactly what is wrong, though.

“You look kind of worn out,” Jared says, cocking his head to the side.

“I’m a little tired, that’s all.” Jensen gives Jared a small smile and gets up, starting to head to the stairs, and Jared gets up as well.

“Are you worried about something?”

Jensen turns around and looks at Jared, shrugging. “Yesterday I tried talking to Danni about our wedding, but…”

Jared lifts and eyebrow. “But what?”

Jensen sits down on the couch this time and Jared sits next to him. Jensen rests his elbows on his knees and looks at Jared sideways.

“I… I always wanted to know where I’m stepping into, you know? Always wanted to feel safe. But lately I have been feeling that my life is just not on the right track. And it’s starting to bother me, to suffocate me.”

Jensen looks lost, so Jared reaches out and gently touches his forearm, offering a smile. “You’re gonna find your way, Jensen. Don’t worry about it.”

Jensen’s smile is a sad one. “Yeah but sometimes the choices I make affect other people’s lives. You know?”

Jared retracts his arm. “Well, if those are the best choices for_ you_, they may also be for those who surround you.”

Jensen chuckles and leans back against the couch. “You speak like it’s easy.”

Jared shrugs. “No, it’s not. I mean… they say that the right path is not always the easiest one. But maybe the answer is easy. Sometimes it’s right in front of your eyes. Who knows?”

Jensen studies Jared for a long time, an indecipherable look on his face. Then, he finally smiles. “That’s why I enjoy talking to you. You have this power of saying things that surprise me.”

Jared shakes his head. “No, Jensen. It’s not that I’m anything special, but perhaps I’m the first one to make you question things in you life that you had never realized needed questioning before.”

With that, Jared gets up. He is feeling tired himself. “Good night, Jensen.”

He walks up the stairs to his bedroom, and Jensen doesn’t move for a long time.

*

The next day, Jared is in his room getting ready to have lunch when there’s a knock on the door.

“Come in!” Jared says, and is surprised as Jeff comes in. Jared didn’t even know he was coming to have lunch with them.

“Hello, Jared. Can I have a word with you?”

Jared nods, wondering what the hell Jeff could possibly want with him. “Sure thing.”

Jeff takes a step towards Jared, and his whole posture and expression put him on high alert. He suddenly looks threatening.

“I have talked to Danneel, you know, Jensen’s fiancée, and she let me know she is suddenly feeling insecure about Jensen. And I think I figured out the reason for this insecurity. So I’m gonna give you a warning: stay away from Jensen.”

Jared stares at Jeff and frowns, he clearly didn’t understand correctly, it’s just too absurd.

“Excuse me? I think I heard you wrong.”

Jeff gives Jared a smile, but there’s nothing nice in it. “No Jared, you heard me right. You are very smart so I know you understand what I said pretty well. You got pregnant with Brock’s child so you could get your hands on some money from his family, but since that plan didn’t work well, now you’re after Jensen. I know what your game is. You’re using this child to get the rest of the family involved, you’re seducing all of them and everyone is falling for it.”

Jared’s jaw drops. “You’re crazy.”

“No I’m not. So I’m gonna repeat it. Don’t mess with Jensen. He is to marry Danneel in a few weeks and nothing will stop this wedding. If you’re smart enough, which you are, you do _not _want me as your enemy, Jared. Leave Jensen alone or I will end you.”

Jared is so shocked at what he just heard that he can’t even find the words to reply. Jeff starts walking out of his room but turns around. “Donna wanted for you to know lunch is ready. I’ll tell her you’re staying in your room because you’re not feeling so good today.”

With that, Jeff leaves and Jared stares at the door. What the fuck just happened?

Jared sits down on the bed to process everything that Jeff just told him. Finally Jared got a chance to see who this Jeff really is. And suddenly the whole picture is very clear to Jared. Things make perfect sense, and Jared is furious. Who does Jeff think he is?

Suddenly Jared makes a decision. He is not afraid of Jeff, and he is gonna make this very clear.

Jared goes downstairs and finds everyone having lunch by the pool. He approaches the table and smiles.

“Hey, sorry I’m late. I was feeling a bit off but now I’m much better.”

Jared glances a look at Jeff, who is giving him a murderous look, but then ignores him to smile at Donna.

“Jared, I’m so glad you’re here! I was just telling them about our visit to the children’s oncology ward, how enlightening it was!”

Jared sits down and looks at Jensen. “You should come with us today, Jensen. I’m sure you would find it beneficial.”

Jensen gives Jared an apologetic look. “I can’t, Jeff and I have a meeting today.”

Jared shrugs. “Fine, if you prefer to go to this meeting, it’s alright.”

Jeff chimes in. “It’s not about what he wants. We had this meeting scheduled for a while now. So no, he cannot go.”

Jared raises his eyebrows at Jeff. “Does Jensen need for you to answer for him, Jeff?”

“Is something happening here?” Donna asks, looking from Jared to Jeff.

“No, it’s just that I thought maybe Jensen would like to go with us. Yesterday, he seemed to think that doing this was a good idea, so I thought I would suggest it.”

Jeff narrows his eyes. “Duty always comes first. It would be nice for you to learn this soon, so you could teach your kid that.”

Jared’s blood boils but he takes a deep breath. “My child will be very well educated, don’t worry. The first thing I’ll teach her is to reject lies and hypocrisy.”

“It’s up to you to be her role model.”

“I’ll be a great role model, you can be sure of it because I’ve been learning a lot from life, and from all the people who surround me.”

An awkward silence stretches at the table, and Donna asks for Loretta to bring dessert so they can drop the subject. Jared feels Jeff’s eyes on him the whole time.

*

Later, Jared goes to the hospital with Chad and Donna to visit the children. It’s good for him to have a distraction from the earlier events. Jared is still pissed at Jeff, and Chad has tried to talk to him about it but Jared brushed him off. He’s not in the mood to discuss all of this.

They are sitting in a large room with the kids, and Chad asks which story they’d like to hear. All kids start screaming at the same time, each one naming a different story, and Jared chuckles. Suddenly the door opens and none other than Jensen walks in.

“What about Hansel and Gretel?”

Jensen looks at Jared with a smile and he returns, his heart suddenly beating faster. “Jensen?”

Donna walks up to give Jensen a smile. “Oh my God, I can’t believe it! I thought you had a meeting?”

Jensen shrugs. “Jeff can handle it by himself.” He gives Jared a long look. “So, what’s going on here? Are you about to tell a story?”

“Yes!” Chad exclaims. “And I know all about Hansel and Gretel so everyone sit down and listen up!”

*

Later the four of them leave the ward and Jared feels so happy, so light. They had a great time with the kids, and Jared could see Jensen enjoying himself.

Jensen surprises Jared even further as he turns to them. “How about we all go for ice cream?”

Donna shakes her head. “Sorry son, I’m tired. Gonna go home and rest.”

“I can’t go either,” Chad tells them. “Need to go to work.”

Jensen looks at Jared, who smiles. He loves ice cream. Donna offers Chad a ride to work, and both leave after saying goodbye to Jared and Jensen.

Jensen turns to Jared. “Feel like going to the botanical garden? There’s a place there with some good ice cream.”

Jared’s smile grows. “Sure thing.”

Jensen drives them, and Jared is happy to be back to this place, having loved it from the first time they came. It quickly became his favorite place in Dallas. They get ice cream and go for a walk around the garden as they eat.

“This place is amazing, even during winter. I feel very good being here.” Jared wants Jensen to know how much he likes the place.

Jensen gives him a sad smile. “My parents used to bring me and Brock here a lot when we were kids. I remember one time we were running around and he fell, scraped his knee. He was crying and I would cry as well just from seeing him in pain. I think I was more scared than him.”

They stop by the lake, there’s a beautiful sunset and Jensen gets a distant look on his face. Jared faces him. “Jensen, are you okay?”

Jensen shrugs, still looking at the lake. “Just… remembering this is so painful. Not that day, but the sentiment that stayed behind. I loved Brock so much, we were so close. Then we grew up, and we also grew apart. We had different interests, I was interested in being the popular guy at school, dating the hot cheerleader. Having cool friends. I was the perfect student, everyone loved me. I started feeling so full of myself. Suddenly my brother was left behind. He was different than me and suddenly he wasn’t good enough anymore.”

Jared can see tears streaming down Jensen’s face, his hands buried deep in his pockets and his voice filled with deep pain.

“And after we grew up, even when I was able to recognize I made a mistake, the rift was already created. I did nothing to fix it, I didn’t go after him. I was ashamed to, because I knew what an idiot I had been. I didn’t know how to reach him. I think I was afraid to realize I wasn’t perfect. Then I ended up becoming this heartless, selfish, cowardly person… who didn’t even cry when his own brother died.”

Jensen lowers his head and lets out a sob, pinching the bridge of his nose with a hand. Jared’s heart sinks as he watches Jensen finally breaking down, and he feels something so deep, so strong at this moment that his own eyes water. Jared reaches out and places a gentle hand on Jensen’s shoulder, taking a step closer.

“Then cry, Jensen. Just cry, let it all out.” Jared caresses Jensen’s hair as he sobs, finally allowing his anguish to get out of his chest. Jared waits patiently, giving Jensen as much comfort as he can.

Finally Jensen lets out a deep breath and looks up, trying to calm himself down. He looks up at the sky and shakes his head, tears still streaming down his face.

“I just…” Jensen turns sideways and faces Jared with anguish in his eyes, he braces himself with both arms around his chest, rubbing his biceps. “I feel so guilty. I wish I could give my brother a hug, ask him to forgive me. Say that… that I love him. Why didn’t I do this when I had the chance? Why did I become this heartless person, why am I like this?”

Jared has had enough. He places both hands on Jensen’s face, wiping away a few tears. “Look at me, Jensen. You still are that boy that cries for his brother.”

Jensen looks down and shakes his head. “It’s too late, Jared.”

Jared lifts Jensen’s face, forcing him to look into Jared’s eyes. “No it’s not.” Jared caresses the spots just below Jensen’s eyes and brings his face even closer. “It’s _not_.”

It feels like being surrounded by a spell. Without thinking Jared closes the distance and plants a kiss to Jensen’s forehead, then to the center of his eyebrows, then his cheek… it’s in the moment between a heartbeat and another that Jared finally pushes his lips against Jensen’s. For a second he pulls back, too startled by it, but then Jensen opens his eyes and looks at him. At that moment, Jared can see Jensen’s bare soul. Jensen reaches up and places a hand behind Jared’s neck, pulling him in and closing the distance between them once more.

Time stops, Jared grabs Jensen’s face more forcefully as he opens his mouth, making Jensen open his own for him. Tentatively Jared licks his way inside at the same time as Jensen places his other arm around his waist, pushing their whole bodies together. A warm feeling takes over Jared’s whole being, it’s something he surely never felt before in his life.

It finally feels like belonging. It feels like coming home. A home that Jared searched for so long, that he craved for so long.

And he just found it in Jensen.

**TO BE CONTINUED...**

** **

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Happy Holidays everyone! ;-)
> 
> (and a huge thanks to my artist Kelly for giving life to their beautiful spot <3 )


	11. Chapter 11

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey guys, Happy 2020! Hope you had awesome holidays! 
> 
> I'll bring you now the aftermath of the kiss! Hope you like it! And I'm glad some of you are on the right track about things, it makes me very happy to read your comments! Please if you can spare some time to lemme know your thoughts!
> 
> By the way, just a heads up, if you have read my story The Love That Remains, I'm gonna be posting a very special timestamp to that story on January 15th. So stay tuned!
> 
> But for now enjoy a new chapter! <3

** _Jensen_ **

It surely feels like a dream, because it’s too damn amazing to be true. Jensen can’t remember feeling so many emotions at once as he did in the past minutes. Jared is pressed up against him, Jensen has an arm around him and is holding his face with his other hand and Jared is warm all around him and the taste of Jared is like…

Feels like heaven.

Feels a lot like…

Jared gently pulls away but not much, and both of them open their eyes, staring deeply at each other. Jared’s mouth is parted and Jensen traces his bottom lip with his thumb. God. His heart is beating so fast in his chest, he was feeling so upset just moments before, finally allowing himself to break down over the loss of his brother and everything they couldn’t be, and now the emotions Jensen is feeling are completely different.

It finally feels _right_.

“Jared…” Jensen whisper close to his face, but Jared silences him with his fingers on Jensen’s lips, a sad smile on his face.

“Don’t say anything.”

Jensen frames Jared’s face with both hands, he wants, _needs_, to touch Jared, to kiss him again, to…

Jared reaches up and touches Jensen’s hands, bringing them down, anguish written all over his face. He starts walking away but Jensen grabs his arm.

“Jared, wait!”

Jared shakes his head, his eyes shining. “It’s better if we go, Jensen. Please.”

Jensen releases him and Jared storms away, Jensen following him. They reach the car and get inside. Before turning the engine on Jensen looks at Jared, he wants to say something but Jared is looking out of the passenger window, body turned away from him. So Jensen sighs and starts the car. The drive home is incredibly awkward, the silence inside the car is louder than if someone was screaming in the back seat. There are so many things going on inside Jensen’s mind that he doesn’t know how to begin processing them.

He just kissed Jared. Holy shit, _he kissed Jared_.

They finally arrive home and Jensen parks in the driveway, Jared is out of the car almost instantly and Jensen rushes to follow him inside. Both of them stop in the foyer to hang their coats and look at each other for a moment. Jensen clears his throat and both speak at the same time.

“Look Jared, about what happened…”

“Look Jensen, about what happened…”

Both stare awkwardly at each other for a moment before Donna and Alan arrive.

“You finally arrived! I was just telling Alan here what an amazing experience we had at the hospital today.”

Donna is smiling but Alan frowns at Jensen. “I was surprised to hear you went. You spend more time at that agency than at home.”

Jensen swallows hard, looking from Jared - who is looking anywhere but at Jensen - to his dad.

“Yeah, I could say today was very unexpected.”

Jared sighs next to him. “If you guys excuse me, I’ll go to my room. It was an exhausting day. Good night.” Still not looking at Jensen, Jared goes up the stairs.

Donna turns to Jensen with a worried look on her face. “Where did you take Jared?”

“We went to the Botanical Garden, watched the sunset there.”

Alan’s eyebrows shoot up. “Isn’t this something you should be doing with your fianceé, Jensen?”

Jensen shrugs. “Danneel is very busy, dad.”

With that, Jensen heads to the stairs as well but Alan calls after him. “Have you decided what you’re going to do for your honeymoon?”

Jensen turns around long enough to answer. “Nope.”

*

It feels like love.

As Jensen lies on his bed, arms crossed behind his head, staring at the ceiling without really seeing it, he finally knows. He can finally put a name to the feeling that has been inside of him for a long time now. It’s like finally finishing a long puzzle, putting the last piece in place.

Jensen loves Jared.

And it’s so new, so raw inside of him. It’s something Jensen has surely never felt before in his life. Not for Danneel, not for Jeff, not for anyone else he has met. No, it’s something new, something amazing. And destiny is funny enough that Jensen ended up feeling it for the last person he would ever expect, the guy Jensen didn’t want coming to his house, the guy Jensen was sure only wanted their money, the guy Jensen tried to hate with all his might, but couldn’t. Because the more he got to know Jared the more he realized he could never hate him, no matter how hard he tried. Jared showed him something new, he broke his defenses, he made Jensen reconnect with his true self. He helped Jensen want to become a better person. And Jensen wants to, he wants to be someone better. For Jared.

Jensen still doesn’t know what he’s going to do from now on, the only thing he is completely sure is that he loves Jared, and not just a little. It feels like Jared is the answer to a question Jensen never asked, the answer to his whole life, the missing piece Jensen never even knew he was missing.

*

Jensen barely gets any sleep that night, a million things going inside his mind. The conclusion he has reached is that he’s truly fucked. He also knows he must talk to Jared. So that’s what he does before going to work, he stops by Jared’s bedroom. Jensen knocks, and after a few seconds Jared tells him to come in.

He slowly enters the room and finds Jared standing by the bed, a wary look on his face. Jensen carefully approaches him, still keeping a careful distance between them.

“Jared, we need to talk. We need to talk about what happened, that kiss…”

Jared cuts him off, pacing around the room. “Jensen, that kiss was a moment of tenderness. I was--I was touched, seeing you letting your emotions out, dropping your defenses, and since we were both very emotional, it happened.” Jared stops and stares at Jensen. “But please, don’t misunderstand it. It means nothing. Nothing’s changed between us nor will change.”

Jensen frowns at Jared, bringing both palms together in front of him in a pleading gesture. Jared needs to understand how everything is different now, at least for Jensen. “What do you mean nothing changed, everything changed! At least for me!” Jensen makes a pause and stares at Jared for a few moments, and he can see the anguish on Jared’s face. “That kiss… it was magical. Jared, it was one of the most amazing moments in my life. I’ve never felt so connected to anyone b…”

“Jensen, it doesn’t matter! I’m pregnant! I’m going to have another man’s baby, and that ends the matter. It’s over.”

Jensen looks at Jared, his heart breaking into pieces. Is it possible that Jared didn’t feel anything?

“Didn’t you feel a thing, Jared? Wasn’t that kiss special to you?”

Jared looks down, and Jensen can see him swallowing hard, his adam’s apple bobbing up and down. “That kiss… it was just a moment of caring.”

Jensen knows he should go, he shouldn’t humiliate himself any further, but he just can’t help it, he needs to ask what has been inside of him the whole night. He takes a step closer to Jared.

“Jared, what if we give us a chance?”

Jared shakes his head. “A chance to what, Jensen? For what? You have your fianceé, you have your lover. I have my baby and this crazy complicated situation I’m in.” Jared walks past Jensen and looks out of the window, his back to him. “What do you think there could possibly be between us under all these circumstances?”

Jensen takes a few steps closer. “Do you still love Justin?”

It takes a few heartbeats but Jared shakes his head. “No. What matters the most to me now is my daughter.”

Jensen nods even if Jared can’t see him. “Okay, I understand. And I respect it. I admire you even more for it. Don’t worry, I won’t bother you anymore.”

Jared nods once. Jensen sighs and turns around to leave, taking two steps before stopping and turning back. Jensen can’t explain why he does it. It’s like an invisible force pulls him back towards Jared, and he takes a chance knowing it can end very badly.

Jensen stands right behind Jared and touches his arm, making him turn around. “Just one more thing…”

When Jared turns, Jensen pulls Jared closer and fuses their mouths together, giving Jared a couple of seconds to back away if he wants to.

Jared stays.

Jensen’s heart beats faster as he frames Jared’s face with a hand, and Jared grabs Jensen’s waist with both hands. Jensen licks Jared’s lips, making him open up for him, and explores Jared’s mouth with his tongue. Jared pulls him closer and Jensen can feel Jared’s baby bump against his stomach, which somehow makes Jensen want him even more. Jensen kisses him passionately, taking advantage of the moment since he doesn’t know when this will happen again. So he’s gonna make it last. They kiss for what seems like hours until finally breaking apart. Jared opens his eyes slowly and looks at Jensen intensely. Jensen traces Jared’s lips with his thumb, and plants one final kiss to his lips before letting go of him and walking away.

*

Jensen arrives at the agency and Jeff is fuming as he enters their office.

“May I ask where the fuck did you go yesterday to leave me alone to handle the clients, Jensen?”

Jensen sits down on his chair and looks at Jeff. “I went to the hospital to meet my mom, Chad and Jared.”

Jeff gets up and stands in front of Jensen’s desk, pointing a finger at him. “You know what this is called? Irresponsibility.”

Jensen gets back up and leans forward. “Call it whatever the fuck you want Jeff, I don’t regret it. Okay?” Jensen sighs and looks away. “And just so you know, it was one of the most beautiful days in my life.”

Jef raises his eyebrows. “Oh is that so? What did you do? Told cute stories to the children with cancer? How moving, Jensen. It’s so politically correct of you!”

“It’s not just moving, it’s enlightening, you should see the faces of those children as we told them stories, Jeff!” Jeff simply rolls his eyes. “And then we went for a walk.”

“We? Who is _we_, Jensen?”

Jensen decides to give it a try and open up to Jeff. Maybe he will understand, they are friends most of all, right?

“Jared and I. We went to the Botanical Garden for ice cream and watch the sunset.”

Jeff narrows his eyes at him. “Excuse me? You took Jared to watch the sunset and eat ice cream, is that so?”

Jensen nods. This is it. “There’s one more thing. Jared and I, we kissed.” Jeff’s jaw drops and Jensen smirks. “That’s right. I’m in love with Jared, Jeff.”

It’s the first time Jensen has said it out loud and it feels so good, so_ right_.

“What nonsense is this, Jensen? You _kissed_ Jared? What the fuck?”

Jensen nods, burying his hands in his pockets. “I did. I’m in love and and lemme tell you Jeff, I’m willing to drop everything to be with him.”

Jeff’s face transforms in an instant, Jensen can tell he’s _enraged_. “What the fuck is this Jensen? Have you lost your goddamn mind, are you insane?” Jeff surges towards Jensen and shoves him back. “What the hell is wrong with you?”

Jensen is startled, Jeff is not taking this well at all for some reason and suddenly Jensen realizes he made a mistake by telling him. So he thinks fast and bursts out laughing.

Jeff fumes. “Why the fuck are you laughing now?”

“I’m laughing at you! You fell for it alright! Oh my God, you’re so easy! Relax!”

Jeff deflates. “Holy shit! That wasn’t funny at all!”

Jensen chuckles, feeling nervous. “Just testing you a bit. You really want me to marry Danneel, huh?”

“You are the one who chose to make a commitment to Danneel.”

Jensen shakes his head. “Why are you so conservative sometimes?”

“I just don’t want you to make the wrong decisions.”

Jensen sits back down. “And how can you tell Danneel is the right choice for me? What if I did decide to drop everything to be with Jared?”

“It would be the biggest mistake of your life. Jared is not a good person and his intentions aren’t good.”

Jensen’s eyes widen. “And what are you basing these accusations on?”

“On my intuition and life experiences. But seriously Jensen, what’s up with you? What’s going on? What’s behind all those jokes of yours?”

Jensen scoffs. “Relax, I’m just kidding around, that’s it. I just don’t undertand why are you so cool with Danneel but you’re jealous as fuck of the thought of Jared.”

Jeff raises an eyebrow. “Because Jared is dangerous.”

Before Jensen can say anything else his secretary calls announcing their first client arrived and the conversation is over. Jensen still can’t really understand why Jeff has such a problem with Jared.

_ **Jared** _

“I think I… I think I have feelings for Jensen.”

It’s the first thing Jared says as he enters the boat house and sits on the couch. He badly needs to talk to someone about it, it has been killing him ever since the kiss at the garden. Jared has been fighting it, denying his feelings, trying to be strong, but he can’t anymore. He even tried to act tough when Jensen came by earlier, but he just couldn’t resist when Jensen kissed him. The truth is, he has fallen for Jensen, and hard. Against all possible odds, for the last person he expected and at the worst possible time. Jared had promised himself he would focus only on his baby but Jensen managed to captivate him. Life is funny like that. The person Jared thought would give him most trouble is now the one that holds his heart. And this person happens to be engaged. And is also having an affair. Oh, and Jared is pretending to be pregnant with his brother’s child.

Yes, to say that Jared is truly fucked is an understatement.

Chad just raises his head from his phone and looks at Jared from his spot on the couch, and he couldn’t be less impressed.

“Yeah. And the sky is blue and Monday comes after Sunday. What else is new?”

Jared’s eyes widen. “What the fuck? You knew it already? How?”

“I’m just not blind. I do have eyes, and I use them.” At Jared’s lost face, Chad purses his lips and locks his phone, setting it aside. “Jare, if it’s any consolation, Jensen looks at you the same way.”

Jared can’t help it, he looks at Chad with a hopeful expression. Despite what Jensen himself said, he needs to hear it from someone else. “He does?”

Chad nods. “Yeah, Jare. The change in Jensen is very visible, he used to be a total dick but he’s getting better. And I gotta say, this has your touch all over. I must admit it, I ship you two.”

Jared chuckles but suddenly turns serious. “Even if we like each other Chad, nothing can happen. Our situation is too complicated right now. Jensen has a fianceé and he has Jeff who is not easy at all. I’m pregnant. I can’t just act like a teenage girl in love. I have to think about my baby, I can’t suddenly start a battle with everyone just because a prince showed up and kissed me.”

Chad’s eyes go as wide as saucers. “A _prince_? Whoa Jared, you have never talked about Justin like this. Jare, if you like Jensen and he likes you, you can’t just cross your arms and claim that it wasn’t meant to be.”

Jared sighs. “Dunno if you forgot, but Jensen is getting married in about two weeks.”

Chad raises an eyebrow. “Then you have two weeks to fight for Jensen. Clock is ticking, Jared, chop-chop!!!”

*

Later when Jared arrives back in the main house, he finds Jensen and Danneel in the living room with Donna, and Danneel is talking excitedly about the wedding. She smiles when she sees Jared.

“Hey Jared, darling! How are you and my niece? I was just telling Donna that I went to see how my wedding dress is doing, it’s almost done and looks gorgeous! Jensen is gonna die when he sees me in it!”

Jared looks at Jensen who is staring at him with an unreadable expression. Jared’s chest suddenly hurts as reality crashes down, imagining Danneel walking down the aisle in a white dress, looking gorgeous and perfect for Jensen in a way Jared never could. Walking towards her future with Jensen. What was Jared even thinking? He forces himself to look at her and smile.

“I bet you’re gonna look great, Danni.”

She claps her hands excitedly, completely unaware of the tension surging between him and Jensen. “I can’t wait!” She then turns to Donna. “Do you think we could have a snack? I’m actually starving!”

Donna tells Danneel to follow her to the kitchen, and Jared has had enough. “I’m going to my room.”

Jared rushes upstairs, fighting his emotions, he does not want anyone to see him cry. He has barely closed the door to his bedroom when Jensen enters. Jared holds up a hand.

“Jensen please go away.”

“Look Jared, I know it may be weird for you, but…”

Jared cuts him off. “Jensen, I mean it. I don’t feel like talking right now. Leave, please.”

Jensen gives him a pleading look. “Jared, this situation isn’t hard just for you. It is for me, as well!”

Jared huffs. “Then that’s one more reason for you to go! Leave me alone, please.”

Jensen deflates in front of him, and swallows hard. “One word, Jared. I just need one word from you and I’m willing to drop everything to be with you.”

Heart hammering in his chest, Jared shakes his head. “You can’t be serious Jensen.”

Jensen takes a step closer, brows drawn together. “I’ve never been so serious in my life, Jared. One word and I’ll drop everything. My engagement, my job, everything.”

Jared purses his lips, trying to control his emotions. As much as he would love nothing more than to be with Jensen, it cannot be like this. He paces in front of Jensen. “Do you have any idea what you’re doing Jensen? You’re pushing onto me a decision that has to be _yours_.”

“But Jared, I’m doing this for you!”

“Then don’t!” Jared sighs, shaking his head as he looks at Jensen. “Don’t do it. Do it for_ your_ happiness, not for me!”

Jensen makes a pleading gesture. “Jared, my happiness is…”

“Jensen, we’ve talked about this! I can’t get involved with you or anyone else right now, I’m going to have a child! I need to figure out what to do with my life, find a solution to this big fat lie we created. I need to defend myself in case Justin shows up. I’m under a lot of pressure Jensen, can you not understand that?”

“But you don’t have to go through all of this alone Jared, I’m with you in this!”

Jared licks his bottom lip. “I appreciate it Jensen, but those are all my things to deal with. And the same goes for you. You have a lot of shit of your own to deal with. So please Jensen, don’t project your salvation onto me, it’s just too much pressure for me to handle.”

Jensen stares at Jared for a few seconds before speaking. “Jared, what happened between us was too important for me. It’s like my whole perspective of things changed, like I’ve been blind my whole life and suddenly I can see.”

“Then use this in your favor. Change whatever you think it needs to be changed. Change for yourself Jensen, not for me.”

Jensen gives him a sad look. “What about how I feel for you? What do I do with it?”

It breaks Jared’s heart to say this, but he knows he needs to do it. It’s the right thing. “Use it to become someone better, like you’ve been doing already. It’s the best we can do for now.” Jared walks closer to Jensen, it hurts to look at his face but he knows he must do this. Despite what Chad says, he just can’t do this right now, as much as it hurts him. “Friendship is also a beautiful thing, Jensen. Perhaps that’s better for us at the moment.”

They stare at each other for a few heartbeats, a thousand emotions going between them, and finally they hear Danneel’s voice coming from downstairs.

“Jensen, are you up there?”

Jared gives Jensen a sad smile. “Your fianceé is calling, Jensen. Time to get back to reality.”

With a final look at Jared, Jensen leaves the room and Jared can hear him going downstairs. Jared finally allows his tears to fall free. He feels desperate, he did _not_ need this right now, on top of everything else.

Why did he have to be stupid enough to go and fall in love with Jensen?

*

It hurts, but Jared decides to try and suck it up, move on with things. He doesn’t want to push Jensen away, even if they can’t be together right now he means what he said, he wants for them to be friends. Jared cares about Jensen and wants to have him in his life. He just did what he thought was best, Jensen can’t throw onto Jared a decision that needs to be wholly his. Jared doesn’t want for Jensen to resent him in the future if Jared tells him that yes, he needs to drop everything so they can just be together. This is not how real life works. Jensen needs to decide for himself, not for anyone else. Jared wants more than anything to be with Jensen, but it needs to be done right. If they are meant to be, life will find a way.

Jared is in the backyard, sitting on a loveseat and reading a book when he feels someone approaching. He looks up and finds Jensen smiling timidly at him. Jared smiles back and makes a motion for Jensen to sit.

“Why are you back from work so early?”

Jensen smiles wider. “I decided I wanted to do something. First I want to tell you what happened at the agency today.” Jared makes an interested face and closes his book, so Jensen goes on. “We had a shooting today for a campaign, but our photographer called in sick so I decided to do the job so we didn’t miss our deadline. And oh my god Jay, it was so great! Even if I was only photographing the models it felt great. I felt I was in my environment, you know? Put on some music and let myself get lost in the shooting. The photos turned out awesome!”

Jensen has an excited look on his face, and Jared stares at him blankly for a few moments, causing Jensen’s smile to falter. “What’s wrong?”

Jared shakes his head and chuckles. “Nothing… it’s just that you called me Jay. You never did that before.”

Jensen’s eyes widen. “Oh, I’m so sorry! I didn’t even realize it, it came naturally. Won’t do it again, I promise.”

Jared raises a hand. “No… It’s--it’s okay. I kinda like it. I don’t think anybody has called me Jay before. You can do it.”

Jared smiles to make sure Jensen knows it’s okay, and Jensen’s own smile is back. “Okay then.”

“And it’s great that you got to do the shooting! I just bet the pictures turned out great! And what did you decide to do today?”

Jensen shrugs. “Well, since I’m kinda rusty I decided to go around the city and take some pictures…” Jensen gives Jared a hopeful look. “I was hoping you would join me.”

Jared purses his lips and looks down. “Jensen…”

“Just as friends, I promise! Just want some nice company, that’s all!”

“Why don’t you ask Danneel to go with you?”

Jensen shakes his head. “Danni is too busy with the wedding preparations.”

“What about Jeff?”

“Jeff thinks this is a waste of time. Come on Jay, please? I promise it’s gonna be fun.”

Jared rolls his eyes to pretend to be annoyed, but can’t help a smile that spreads across his face. “Fine! We can go!”

*

As it turns out, they do spend a great afternoon together. Jensen wants to photograph different people, so they go to several places. Jared watches as Jensen works, how passionate he is. They go to a local park and Jensen spends some time taking random pictures, and eventually Jared finds a dog. He spends some time crouched down, playing with him and laughing, and doesn’t even realize Jensen has arrived next to him, camera in hand. Jensen offers a hand to help Jared get up, which Jared takes.

“How is it going?”

Jensen smiles. “Perfect. I think I’m all done. Why don’t we go to that Starbucks across the street for some coffee as I show you what I have?”

Jared smiles back. “Sounds great.”

Jared chooses a table as Jensen goes get their drinks - hot chocolate for Jared - and then joins him. Jensen shows Jared the pictures on the camera screen, and Jared can’t help feeling a warmth inside. They are all so fantastic, Jensen is extremely talented. When Jensen shows him the last ones, Jared gasps. It’s pictures of Jared playing with the dog, that Jared wasn’t aware Jensen took.

“I didn’t see you taking this photo, Jen.”

Jensen smiles and Jared realizes he also used a nickname for Jensen for the first time, and he gets what Jensen meant, it came out naturally. Apparently Jensen likes it as well.

“Took it when you weren’t looking. You were lost in your own world with that dog, and I wanted to capture it like I did the other day at home by the pool.” Jensen runs a gentle fingers through the screen. “If you pay attention, you can see how your thoughts take over everything around you.”

Jared smiles looking at it, then his gaze travels to Jensen. “You’re good with these kinds of pictures, you know? You capture the suspended instant.” Jensen looks at him intensely, and Jared goes on, staring at a random point in front of him as he wonders. “You know that brief moment between one breath and the next? You exhale, and then a fraction of a second passes before you inhale again? It’s like you capture that instant… that empty instant, that sustains all others.”

A moment passes before Jensen speaks, eyes locked on Jared. “Where have you been all this time?”

Jared purses his lips and looks down, his heart beating faster but they just can’t get into this now. “Jen…”

Jensen places both hands in front of him. “Okay. I promise I’ll control myself. Let’s go get these photos printed?”

Jared smiles again, and nods. “Sure thing.”

Jensen drives them to the agency and takes Jared to his office. Jared is glad Jeff isn’t there, and Jensen plugs his camera to his computer so he can transfer the photos. Jared stands behind him as they see the images, and they look even more beautiful in a bigger size. Jensen opens the ones he took of Jared, there’s another one Jared didn’t know Jensen took, of him walking towards the dog, his baby bump visible from this angle. Jared smiles at that. Jensen sends that one to the printer, and when it’s ready, he gets up to take it, showing it to Jared.

“I love that one.”

Jared takes the picture and smiles at Jensen. “It’s a very beautiful picture.”

Jensen smiles back, looking lovingly at Jared. “I’m gonna include that in your pregnancy album. That way you can show it to your daughter someday and she will see how beautiful you were on this day.”

Jared stares at Jensen for a few moments, lost in the endless green of his eyes, and the words come out of his mouth before he can stop them. “Where have you been all this time?”

It’s like a spell involves them, Jared feels himself being pulled towards Jensen, who apparently is coming closer as well. Jared’s heart beats faster as he looks at Jensen’s mouth…

The spell is broken as the door to the office bangs open and Jeff’s voice comes between them. “Jensen, are you there?”

Jensen sighs and sits down again on his chair. “I--yeah, I’m printing some photos.”

Jeff turns to Jared with narrowed eyelids. “How are you, Jared? I’m surprised to see you here.”

Jared looks at Jeff for a couple of seconds but doesn’t even bother answering, choosing to focus on the pictures again. Jeff comes closer to study them as well. “What photos are those?”

“I took them today,” Jensen says as he goes through the pictures. “They look great, don’t they?” Jensen prints one of Jared with the dog and shows it to Jeff, who grabs it from Jensen’s hand and looks at it with a cold expression.

“Interesting images.” Jeff looks from the picture to Jared. “This one is very good.”

Jared looks away and Jensen gets up. “Well, I’m gonna take Jared home, he’s tired.”

Jeff raises an eyebrow. “You’re coming back after, right?”

“I assumed you could run the meeting without...”

“Jensen, I’m glad you dedicated a few hours of your day to your _hobby_, but don’t forget this agency is also yours.” Jeff takes a step closer to Jared, who instantly feels colder, and gives him a smile that makes him shiver. “Bye, Jared. Show up anytime.”

Jeff walks out of the office and suddenly Jared’s good mood is completely gone, he’s _pissed_. He turns to Jensen. “You don’t need to drive me home Jensen, I’ll catch a cab.”

Jared starts walking away but Jensen raises a hand. “No Jared, I’ll take you!”

“_You don’t have to_. You have more important things to do.”

Jared walks out of the office and rushes out of the agency, but he can hear Jensen coming after him. When Jared arrives at the sidewalk Jensen blocks his path. “Jay, please. Lemme drive you home, I don’t want you to take a cab. I invited you to spend the afternoon with me, it’s only fair I’ll take you back home. _Please_.”

Jared lets out a deep breath and rolls his eyes, he’s so frustrated with this whole situation but he doesn’t argue any further. Jared doesn’t answer but allows Jensen to guide him to the car. He doesn’t say a single word on the way home, spending the whole ride looking out of the window. Jared can feel Jensen’s eyes on him many times, but he refuses to look back.

When Jensen parks in the driveway Jared gets out of the car and quickly walks towards the front door, but Jensen catches up to him, blocking his way again.

“Jared, wait! Come on, what’s up with you?”

Jared purses his lips. “Jensen, go back to your meeting. You’re gonna be late.”

Jensen frowns. “Wait a second, You’re mad at me because I have to go back to the agency?”

Jared gives him an exasperated look. “No Jensen! What pisses me off is that you allow yourself to be manipulated by Jeff!”

Jensen’s frown deepens. “I don’t allow myself to be manipulated by Jeff.”

Jared gives him a humorless laugh. “Oh you do. Yes you do, Jensen. And Jeff is so smart that you don’t even realize it!”

“You’re exaggerating Jared. I only have a work meeting, that’s all. Besides, I own the agency, have you forgotten that?”

Jared narrows his eyelids. “You and Jeff do. You two are… partners, right?”

Jensen nods. “Yes. I had the money to invest and the chance to open the agency as an affiliated to my dad’s, and Jeff had the experience to help me.”

Jared nods. “Okay, then answer me this. Whose idea was it to open this agency?”

“Mine,” Jensen says simply and Jared just looks at him with a raised eyebrow. “Okay, in a certain way it was Jeff’s but…”

“Do you understand where I’m getting at, Jensen? You never wanted that agency, you never wanted to be a businessman, you have an artist soul, Jensen! It’s a shame you’re so complacent.”

Jensen stares at Jared for a few moments until his phone rings. He fishes it out of his pocket and looks at the screen with a frown on his face. Jared chuckles.

“It’s Jeff, isn’t it?” Jensen looks at Jared and doesn’t answer. “Go back to him, Jensen. He is waiting.”

With that, Jared walks past Jensen into the house. He feels somewhat relieved at having had the chance to give Jensen a hint about what’s really going on. Jared only hopes Jensen at least thinks about it.

_ **Jensen** _

As Jensen drives back to the agency, his mind is going a mile a minute. Jared just accused Jeff of manipulating him. That can’t be true, can it? Sure, Jeff has helped Jensen with some decisions in his life, gave him some pushes in the right direction but that’s it. Jeff and him are good friends, partners in the agency, and like to fool around occasionally. That’s it. Jensen doesn’t understand where did Jared come up with this idea that Jeff manipulates him. It’s ridiculous, Jared has a completely wrong idea about them.

It’s ridiculous. Right?

Jensen arrives at the agency and goes straight to the meeting, it’s long, boring and exhausting. He hates those. When it’s over, Jensen is about ready to go home, take a shower and relax. But before he does, he wants to print something so he goes to his office while Jeff sees their clients out. There’s a picture Jensen took earlier, he hasn’t shown it to Jared yet but it may be his favorite. He prints it and puts it in an envelope as Jeff enters the office.

“Still working? I assumed you’d be running out of the door as soon as the meeting ended.”

Jensen answer as he turns his computer off. “I’m going now. Just came to print something.”

Jeff approaches and sits down on the edge of Jensen’s desk, right next to him. “I told you a meeting wouldn’t kill you. See, you can do your hobby and take care of your responsibilities at the same time.”

“Yeah, but photography isn’t just my hobby. It’s my passion and you know it.”

Jeff crosses his arms in front of his chest. “Well, you are a decent photographer, I gotta admit.”

Jensen raises an eyebrow. “Just decent?”

Jeff nods, unfazed. “Yep. But you can’t forget that real work always comes first, Jensen. Especially now that you’re about to start a family.”

Jeff grabs Jensen’s jaw and plants a kiss to his lips before going to his own desk. It leaves a sour taste in Jensen’s mouth and he wastes no time grabbing his things and leaving the office.

*

Jensen drives home with a million things in his mind, and his head hurts. He goes straight to his room and sits on the bed to examine the picture of Jared he printed. Jensen had once more managed to catch Jared unguarded at the park when Jared was staring at the sky, his skin bathed in sunlight. Jensen is mesmerized as he looks at the picture, Jared is the definition of beauty. He is so purely beautiful that it even hurts to look at the picture. His eyes are a thousand different colors, Jensen can’t even define or separate them all. They’re the most incredible eyes Jensen has ever seen, in this picture they have a bit of hazel, blue, green, and some yellow too. But they keep changing colors and it mesmerizes Jensen. He admires the fox shape of Jared’s eyes, his pointed nose, the mole right next to it, his angled face, his perfect mouth, his shaggy chestnut hair. God, how naturally beautiful Jared is! Jensen runs his fingers over the picture, tracing Jared’s face as his heart beats faster. He almost gives in to the urge to keep the picture for himself but he printed it for Jared. So he grabs a pen and scribbles down two words on the back of the photo.

_Beautiful daddy._

_\- J_

Jensen places the photo back inside the envelope again and goes to Jared’s room. He lightly knocks but there’s no answer so he peeks in and finds Jared already sleeping. Jensen carefully walks in and places the envelope on the nightstand, right next to the framed picture he gave to Jared. He starts leaving the room but can’t help looking back at Jared’s sleeping form. Jensen tries to resist but his feet take him closer. He stands next to Jared and leans down, supporting himself with a hand on the headboard. Their faces just an inch apart, he inhales Jared’s scent, making his heart to flutter, then he reaches out and caresses Jared’s hair and watches him for a few moments, an impossibly strong feeling taking ahold of him. Jensen wishes he could stay and watch Jared all night long, but it wouldn’t be right, and he doesn’t want to scare Jared, so he reluctantly leaves.

After taking a shower and going through his nightly routine, Jensen lies in bed awake, staring at the ceiling. Now that he’s relaxed he can think more clearly, he can try and see the bigger picture. Could Jared be right?

Jensen met Jeff through other friends while he was still in college. Jeff immediately took an interest in him, they started going out but Jeff never wanted for them to be anything serious. Jeff was the one who suggested that they open their own agency since he knew Jensen’s dad had a big agency of his own.

It was Jeff’s idea, not Jensen’s. Jensen had always wanted to be a photographer, he only went to college to get a degree and please his dad. Jeff made Jensen give up his passion in order to follow what his dad wanted him to be, what _Jeff_ wanted him to be. Brock was so much braver than Jensen, he did not want to follow the family business so he stood up to their father and left when it was clear he wouldn’t have Alan’s support. God, Brock was so much stronger than Jensen. And Jeff was so smart, he played Jensen into making him believe it was his own idea to open the agency, not Jeff’s.

Almost like…

The idea of marrying Danneel.

It strikes Jensen like a bomb. Jeff was the one who introduced Danneel to Jensen, he managed to make up Jensen’s mind into proposing to her.

_“She is the right girl for you. You’re gonna make the perfect couple.”_

_“Isn’t it about time you proposed to her?”_

Jeff _chose_ their wedding rings, damnit.

Tears fall down Jensen’s face as everything sinks in. Why has Jensen never realized any of this in years and Jared, who has been in the picture for a couple of months, figured it all out? Everything has been a lie, and Jensen feels cheated. What he can’t understand though, is _why_ Jeff did all of this? What is his interest in manipulating Jensen like this? Jensen feels once again as if he is missing an important part of the puzzle and he can’t find it.

He spends almost the whole night wide awake, tossing and turning, trying to decide what to do. In the morning, he has reached a decision on where to at least start.

**TO BE CONTINUED...**


	12. Chapter 12

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey guys! First of all, want to share with those who didn't see it, and who have read The Love That Remains, I just posted a timestamp to that story! Link is [here.](https://archiveofourown.org/works/21880096)
> 
> And then, I want to thank you all again for reading my story, I love reading all of your theories and how you speculate about Jeff! As usual, if you can spare some time, share your thoughts with me!
> 
> And I want to remind you all again before reading this chapter: nobody in this story is perfect, everyone is human who can make mistakes alright? Don't forget that!
> 
> xoxo

_**Jensen** _

“Jensen, I’m glad you arrived. I want you to help me choose the models to…”

“Jeff, I have an announcement to make,” Jensen says as he enters the office and walks to his desk. His heart is beating a mile a minute, but Jensen knows this is the right thing to do, he has been considering everything the whole night.

Jeff raises both eyebrows and looks up at Jensen. “Judging by the look on your face, it must be something serious.”

Jensen buries both hands in his pockets and clears his throat. “Well, I’ve been thinking, actually I’ve been thinking about a lot of things lately, and I’ve reached a decision that concerns you.”

“And may I ask what decision is that?”

Jensen takes a deep breath. “I’m going to leave the agency.”

Jeff’s eyes widen, he places both palms on the desk and gets up. “You want to leave the agency, Jensen? What the fuck is this now?”

“Don’t worry, I won’t be leaving immediately. This agency means a lot to me but I’ve decided I don’t want this routine for me anymore.”

Jeff makes a confused face. “But Jensen, we…”

Jensen interrupts him, pacing around the room. “Jeff, you were born to do business. You have this in you but I feel like I’m wasting away in here.”

“But… what are you going to do with your life?”

Jensen shrugs. “I’m gonna keep coming here for a while, I’ll give you full control bit by bit… until you buy my share of the agency.”

Jeff scoffs. “Jensen, I don’t have the money to buy your share!”

“You can pay me whenever you want, Jeff. Alright? It’s only fair that this agency becomes wholly yours, it was your idea to begin with.”

Jeff slowly walks closer to Jensen, a pleading look on his face. “But it belongs to _us_. Remember when we chose the name? J for our initials, A for Ackles and M for Morgan. It’s _our _agency, Jensen, we built all of this together. Every contract, every small victory belongs to the both of us. If you leave… I don’t even know what to tell you, it doesn’t make any sense for me to stay here, it’s better if we close the agency altogether.”

Jensen sits down on his chair, collecting some photos he had printed to take home with him. “Jeff, you’re getting ahead of yourself.”

Jeff leans over Jensen’s desk and leans in close. “Oh, you show up here, out of the blue you tell me you’re undoing our partnership and _I_ am getting ahead of myself?”

Jensen gets up and walks away from Jeff. “Jeff, this place is yours, not mine. I need to do something that makes me happy. I need to move on.”

Jeff turns around to face him, studying Jensen for a few seconds. “May I ask you something? Think about it a bit more. I’m not gonna push, but please… think about it, if it’s really worth it to let go of so many great things.”

Jensen sighs and walks to the door, opening it. He turns around one more time to face Jeff. “Well, I’ve made my decision. I just wanted you to be the first to hear it. After all, I owe this to you.”

Jensen closes the door behind him, feeling twenty pounds lighter. He knows it’s the best decision he could make, Jared is right, this agency was never what Jensen wanted. Now he can dedicate himself to his true passion. It feels great.

*

Jensen arrives home and finds Jared in the living room watching a movie. Jensen takes a deep breath and approaches him.

“Hey Jay.”

Jared looks up from the movie and gives him a small smile. “Hey Jen. You’re back home early.”

Jensen nods and sits down on the couch next to Jared. “Had a good reason.”

Jared raises an eyebrow. “Really? Hope it’s a really good one. By the way… thank you for the picture. It’s very beautiful, you managed to capture a good moment of mine. I love it.”

Jensen smiles wide with pride. “I’m glad you like it. Speaking of…” Jensen licks his lips as he prepares to share with Jared the news. “I’ve decided to dedicate myself to my photography.”

Jared’s eyes grow wide. “Oh really? What about the agency?”

Jensen shrugs. “I’m gonna leave it. I’ll keep going there sometimes for a while until Jeff can buy my share.”

Jared stares at Jensen in silence for a few moments, clearly dumbstruck with the news. “Whoa, Jensen. Are you sure about this?”

Jensen nods and reaches out, squeezing Jared’s forearm for a few moments. “Yeah, I am. And it’s all thanks to you, who opened my eyes to what really matters in life.”

Jared gives Jensen a full smile. “Jen, that’s amazing! I’m very proud of you. I told you, it’s all about the decisions you make.”

Jensen smiles back, spending a few moments just looking lovingly at Jared. Then he blinks to gather himself back together and shows Jared the envelope he brought with him.

“Take a look at those. It’s some of the photos I took.”

Jensen takes them all from the envelope and spreads all over the coffee table. Jared leans forward to take a look at everything, and has an amazed look on his face. “Jen, these are all amazing! You really have an eye for this kind of thing, this is an awesome material. Why don’t you do an exhibition?”

Jensen scrunches up his nose. “Nah, I don’t think so. For an exhibition I’d need a lot of material.”

Jared scoffs and shows him the pictures on the table. “You _do_ have a lot of material, duh! What’s all this?”

Jensen considers it but shakes his head. “Yeah but I don’t think this would work. This theme is very common already, a lot of photographers have done work like this, showing the ordinary life. I’d need something new, something different. I actually don’t know what I want.”

Jared spends some time in silence, going over the pictures until he takes some from under a pile. “What’s these ones? It’s not from the day we went out.”

Jensen shakes his head as he looks at the pictures of some models. “No, it’s from the other day at the agency when I had to fill in for a photographer.”

Jared studies the pictures for a while with a frown on his face, and then suddenly looks at Jensen, brandishing the pictures on his face. “Why don’t you choose this theme?”

Now it’s Jensen’s time to frown. “What theme?”

“This! The backstage of the fashion world! You could show how that’s really like, behind the glamour of a runway or a photoshoot. The anxiousness of the models, them getting ready, the creation process of the stylists. All of this! Everybody likes to see this kind of stuff, you could show the human side behind the perfect result we normally get to see.”

Jensen stares at Jared for a few moments, the sentiment inside him so strong he wishes he could kiss him senseless right now. But he holds back, choosing to give him a blinding smile instead. “Jared, you’re a genius! This is actually perfect! It has been done before yes, but I know I could do something great with it! And I have a friend I can talk to that could help me get started. Will you come with me?”

Jared nods, smiling back at him. “Definitely.”

*

“Jared, this is Tom Welling, the editor for one of the fashion magazines we work with. Tom this is Jared. He’s… a friend.”

Tom smiles at Jared after giving Jensen’s a half hug. “Hello Jared, nice to meet you! What brings you here, Jensen?”

Jensen licks his lips. “Well… I wanted to ask you something. I’ve decided to dedicate myself to photography, and I want to register the backstage of the fashion world, what happens behind the official cameras and audience. And I was hoping you would allow me to use some pages of your magazine to publish some photos, do a sort of editorial of the making of. What do you say?”

Tom considers it for a few moments and smiles at Jensen. “I think it’s a great idea, Jensen! It’s gonna be great to show fashion under a different eye, the grit behind the glamour. You have the green light to do it, we always had a great relationship with your agency. In fact, we are having a photoshoot at the park starting soon, if you want to go there and do some work.”

Jensen smiles and looks at Jared, who seems excited as well. “Well, thank you so much Tom. We are definitely going there!”

*

Jensen spends a great afternoon at the park with Jared, photographing everything happening at the photoshoot. It’s a cowboy theme, Jared has somehow managed to grab a cowboy hat and is walking around wearing it. Jensen can’t help but taking pictures of him as well, because damn if Jared doesn’t look gorgeous. He has been so excited about it ever since they left Tom’s office, saying how cool was it that Tom agreed with it, and that it would be amazing. Jensen couldn’t help feeling warmer with all the support coming from Jared. Jared assists Jensen through it all, and they make a great team. In the end Jensen shows Jared the pictures on the camera screen, and Jared smiles radiantly.

“Jen, these are all amazing! I told you how talented you are, how you have this ability of capturing the right moments. This is gonna be a hit, I can tell!”

Jensen looks up from the camera and smiles back at him. “Thank you for all of this, Jay. It was all because of your push.”

Jared smiles even wider, making Jensen’s heart to beat faster. Before leaving he takes Jared for some ice cream, as a little way to say thank you to him. It’s an amazing day and makes Jensen feel that he definitely made the right choice.

*

Jensen arrives home with Jared, both smiling and talking about the day, when they find Alan in the living room, looking anything but pleased.

“I’m glad you are back. Jensen, please come to my office, I want to have a word with you.”

Jensen feels tense immediately. He looks at Jared how gives him a small smile and a nod. He nods back and follows his dad to the office.

“What’s up, dad?”

Alan closes the door and turns to him, making an indignant face. “Jeff was here. Are you really giving up on the agency to become a photographer?”

Jensen nods. “Yes I am. I wish you could be supportive, you should ask Tom what a good job I did today for his magazine.”

“I’m not questioning your talent Jensen, I’m just wondering why are you giving up on something that is so successful.”

Jensen throws his arms to the sides. “Exactly. It’s already successful, there’s no new challenges for me there. I want something new dad, new horizons. I want to do what I love.”

“Then why don’t you do both things? You don’t need to leave the agency!”

“Dad, I don’t want to do both things. I want to feel free!”

Alan frowns. “This is a very weird argument for someone who is getting married in a few weeks, Jensen.”

Jensen purses his lips. “Yeah dad, about the wedding I’ve been thinking…”

“Don’t you dare, Jensen! Don’t you even so much as _think_ about this possibility. I know very well what’s happening, I’m not blind or stupid. I see how close you and Jared have gotten.”

Jensen raises his eyebrows and nods, nod even trying to deny it. “Yeah. I care very much about Jared indeed.”

Alan scoffs. “I couldn’t care less how you feel. I demand you to get away from that man immediately!”

Jensen’s eyes widen, not really believing what he’s hearing right now. “Yeah, but it was _you_ who brought that man to this house!”

Alan shakes his head. “I did it exclusively because of your mother’s health and that alone. That’s why I asked Jared to lie about the father of his baby. But yeah, he didn’t do it for us. No, he saw what a great opportunity it was. And I don’t even blame him, it’s not easy to raise a child these days, so it was perfect for him. But we _don’t know_ this man.”

Jensen shrugs. “He was close friends with Brock and Chad.”

“This doesn’t mean he’s a good person.”

“Why are you being this judgmental all of the sudden dad?”

“What spell did Jared put on you, Jensen? You were the first one to say he was a freeloader!”

“I was a fool, okay?”

Alan raises his eyebrows. “Oh, you were a fool? Or are you being fooled now?”

Jensen narrows his eyes. “Are you underestimating me dad?”

“Jensen, I never meddled in your life. If you want to sell your share of the agency it’s your business. But I won’t accept that you hurt your fianceé because of this… nobody.”

Something suddenly dawns on Jensen. “I see Jeff worked his magic on you as well, huh dad? He got you to believe all those awful things about Jared, he’s that good.” Jensen purses his lips. “Okay so, was that the message? Excuse me then.”

“Jensen!”

Jensen rushes out of the office and runs upstairs to his bedroom. He feels so pissed, he wants to throw, to punch something. What the fuck is happening to everybody? Why does everyone think they have the right to meddle in Jensen’s life? He is tired of this shit.

Jensen decides to take a hot shower, and spends a good amount of time under the spray, just allowing for the water to wash over him. His life is such a mess right now, and Jensen knows it takes a lot of courage to change things. He just isn’t sure he has what it takes.

When he comes back inside the bedroom, towel wrapped around his waist, his phone rings, and the display tells him it’s Danneel. Jensen sighs and sits on the bed.

“Hey, Danni.”

_“Hey baby! Wanted to check on you, see how you’re doing after… well.”_

Jensen is confused for a second but then he licks his lips, closing his eyes. “Jeff told you I’m leaving the agency, huh?”

_“Yes he did! I stopped by to see how you were doing and you were gone, and Jeff told me about your decision.”_

“Do you also think it’s stupid?”

_“Well… I don’t know. I think you should stay there because it’s your agency but if you feel like doing something else… then you should do what you think it’s better for you.”_

Jensen is quiet for a few moments and pinches the bridge of his nose. “You ever wish you could just… I don’t know, change things? Start over?”

Danneel chuckles._ “Well, yeah! When I have that feeling I go shopping for a new piece of clothing, or dye my hair!”_

Jensen lets out a deep breath. “I mean something bigger, Danni.”

There’s silence for a few seconds. _“Are you… you aren’t thinking about calling off the wedding, are you baby?”_

Jensen purses his lips and closes his eyes tight, his heart beating fast, anguish taking over him. “N--no, Danni. Everything is fine, don’t worry about it.”

Danneel then starts to talk about the flowers and Jensen only has a word in his mind. _Coward_.

But when Jensen hangs up, he makes a decision. He puts on some clothes and drives to Jeff’s apartment. When Jeff opens the door, he makes a surprised face. “Jensen! What brings you here?”

Jensen enters the apartment and walks past Jeff, his voice louder than he expected but see if he cares. “I came here to ask you to stop meddling in my life! I’m tired of it!”

“Would you calm down??”

Jensen speaks even louder. “And stop telling me how to behave! You need to stop gossiping to my dad and to Danneel!”

Jeff scoffs. “I wasn’t gossiping, I just thought both needed to know you are leaving the agency!”

Jensen screams, pointing a finger to Jeff’s face. “They had to hear it from _me_, not you!”

Jeff makes a pleading face. “You were making rushed decisions, I just thought I had a duty to warn two people that care about you! Jensen, I don’t want for you to throw everything you built away to embark in a childish adventure!”

Jensen narrows his eyes. “Jeff, you need to understand that it’s _my_ life, if I fail it’s _my_ problem!”

Jeff takes a step closer. “It’s my problem too, because I like you Jensen, I worry about you!”

Jensen rolls his eyes. “Cut that out, Jeff! I never asked for this from you!”

Jeff shakes his head. “I don’t tell my heart how to feel, Jensen! We are connected, if you’re suffering I suffer too! Don’t you get it?”

Jensen sighs, licking his lips as he studies Jeff and makes a decision. “Then, I think it’s time we disconnect from each other.”

Jeff’s eyes widen. “What do you mean by that?”

“You know exactly what I mean. It’s gonna be better for us.”

Jensen starts walking to the door but Jeff gets to him and grabs his arm. “No Jensen, wait! You’re not leaving here.”

Jensen puts a distance between them. “I can’t, Jeff. Our relationship has become toxic.”

Jeff is giving him a pleading look. That’s new. “Jensen, this is only a phase. We’ve been through some rough times in the past. We have such a strong relationship. We are never gonna feel for someone else what we feel for each other.”

Jensen thinks about Jared, and gives Jeff a sad smile. “That’s not true. I can’t do this anymore.”

Jeff closes the distance again. “Jensen, please stay here tonight.”

Jensen purses his lips. “Jeff…”

Jeff grabs a glass from the coffee table, he was probably drinking before Jensen arrived, and offers it to him. “Come on please. Have a drink, you need to relax. Stay with me tonight.”

Jeff brings the glass to Jensen’s lips, pretty much forcing him to either drink the bourbon or letting it spill all over his shirt. It burns Jensen’s throat. Jeff comes even closer. “We always made up in bed, babe. Come on.” He places a hand behind Jensen’s neck and kisses his mouth once, twice. “I’m asking you, please stay here.”

“Jeff come on…”

Jeff tips more of the drink to Jensen’s lips, then sets the glass down and grabs Jensen’s face with both hands, looking him in the eye. “Please. Don’t go.”

And Jensen caves.

_ **Jared** _

Jared is having breakfast with Donna and Alan, still thinking about the events from the previous day. It was great to spend the day with Jensen, to see him finally deciding to do what he loves. Jared had his doubts that Jensen would have the courage but it’s good to know he was wrong in this one. Alan doesn’t seem to be as happy about it though, judging from the look on his face. Jared doesn’t know what he and Jensen talked about yesterday in Alan’s office, but he can guess it wasn’t very pleasant. Alan keeps shooting Jared strange looks, making him feel slightly uncomfortable.

Thankfully Chad appears with a smile on his face and a hand behind his back. “Morning, everyone!”

Donna smiles. “Morning Chad! Do you have something there?”

Chad gives them a mischievous smile. “Well, I have a present for my goddaughter!”

Chad reveals what had been behind his back. A chocolate brown teddy bear. Jared smiles and Donna brings a hand to her mouth.

“Oh my God, it’s Fluffy!”

“Yeah, I found it in the boat house, and remembered him from Brock’s childhood pictures. He was always holding this thing!”

Donna smiles fondly. “Yeah, he was. Brock loved this teddy bear.”

Chad hands it to Jared. “I thought my niece would love this. I cleaned it because it has been in there gathering dust for a long time but it’s almost brand new now!”

Jared smiles and takes the bear from Chad. It’s very fluffy and soft. “Chad, this is awesome, thank you! I’m sure she will love it just as much as Brock did!”

Minutes later Jared excuses himself to go upstairs. He wants to show the bear to Jensen, he didn’t show up for breakfast so he probably decided to have a lazy morning. Jared opens the door to Jensen’s room with an excited smile on his face.

“Jen, look what Chad found…” Jared takes two steps inside and stops. The room is empty. He checks the bathroom but it’s empty as well. Jared goes to the window and looks outside for the first time, noticing that Jensen’s car is not there. And he knows Jensen didn’t go out early because Jared himself woke up hours ago and didn’t hear or see Jensen. Jared’s heart drops as he realizes Jensen didn’t spend the night at home, and he leaves his room quickly still clutching the teddy bear in his hands.

*

A little while later as Jared sits on the front porch, he tells himself he just wants to do some street watching, he’s not waiting for Jensen, not at all. He is also not wondering where the hell Jensen spent the night ever since he found his room empty and his car gone. His heart is also not breaking over this fact. Not at all.

Eventually Jensen’s car pulls up in the driveway, and Jared’s heart skips a bit. He sits up straighter on the loveseat as he watches Jensen getting out of the car, looking pensive, and walks to the front door. As he climbs the steps to the porch, Jensen finally spots Jared and stops dead in his tracks. Jared slowly gets up and takes two steps towards Jensen, his arms crossed in front of his chest.

“Had a good night?”

Jensen swallows hard and gives Jared a nervous chuckle. “Oh hey, you’re here.”

Jared gives him a sad smile. “Yeah. You were the one who weren’t.”

Jensen purses his lips and looks down, taking a few steps towards Jared and finally looking up. “Do you want to know where I spent the night?”

Jared shakes his head feeling a pang in his heart. “No. You don’t owe me any explanations, Jensen. I have nothing to do with the things you do.”

Jensen sighs. “I spent the night with Jeff.”

Jared’s jaw drops and he feels pissed knowing that. “Excuse me? You spent the night with that… _man_ and you still have the nerve to tell me?”

“I don’t want to lie to you, Jared. I made a commitment to myself to always tell you the truth.”

“You don’t have to go through this trouble, Jensen. Like I said, I have nothing to do with whatever, or whomever, you choose to do.”

Jared walks past Jensen to get inside, but Jensen grabs his elbows, stopping him. “Jared please, lemme explain.”

Jared yanks his arm away. “Explain what? Explain how that man manipulates you, that he does whatever he wants with you and all he has to do is say the word for you to go running to him?”

“Jared, Jeff is my friend. My first guy, my partner in a lot of important moments. He is important to me, of course I care about him!”

Jared raises his eyebrows. “And because you care, you spent the night with him?”

“It was the last time Jared, like a goodbye. I did this in honor of everything we had together, the long-lasting relationship we had.”

Jared licks his bottom lip and nods, his eyes narrowing. “Does Jeff know this was a night of the goodbye?”

Jensen shrugs. “I think he got the message.”

Jared can’t help it, he bursts out laughing. “Oh my God Jensen, you are so naive! You really believe Jeff is gonna let go of his boytoy just like this?” Jared snaps his fingers on Jensen’s face. “Wake up!”

Jensen huffs. “Jared stop saying I’m his boytoy! What we had is more than that!”

Jared gives Jensen a sad look. “I know. That’s why I doubt this thing really just ended like you said.”

Jared tries to leave again, but once more Jensen grabs his arm. “Jared…”

“Let go of me, Jensen.”

They stare at each other for a couple of seconds until a voice interrupt them.

“Let go of him, Jensen.”

It’s Alan’s voice, probably leaving for work. Jensen drops his arm and with one last look, Jared leaves to get inside the house, his heart hurting deeply. Why is Jensen like this? When Jared thinks he is getting better, he goes and does stuff like this. Jared climbs the stairs to his bedroom, closes the door behind him and starts pacing, a lot of things going inside his mind.

A few moments later the door opens again. Jared expects it to be Jensen and turns around to tell him to leave, but finds Alan instead.

“We need to have a word, Jared.” Alan’s face is not friendly at all, and Jared takes a step back.

“What is it, Mr. Ackles?”

Alan narrows his eyes. “I’m gonna be straight with you, Jared. I’ve been noticing lately a growing involvement between you and Jensen.”

Jared swallows hard, his heart beating faster, and he crosses his arms in front of his chest. “I have nothing to do with your son, Mr. Ackles.”

“Oh I hope you don’t. Because I won’t allow any kind of involvement between you two.”

Jared’s blood boils and he is having none of it. “Who do you think you are to speak with me like this Mr Ackles? Just because I’m in your house, and dependent on you, it doesn’t give you the right to offend me!”

Alan gives him a cold glare. “You are in this house because of a deal I made with you. You help my wife and in return I support you and your child. And I’ve been doing my part, I even accepted that your friend came to live here too. Now if I realize that you’re taking any advantage over my hospitality or my family…”

Jared interrupts him, he is _done_. “What are you going to do, Mr. Ackles? Kick me out? Oh please, don’t even bother. I have some dignity.”

Jared grabs his wallet and phone as Alan hold up a hand. “Jared, wait! Where are you going?”

“I’m not gonna stay in this house a minute longer.”

Alan scoffs. “Are you insane?”

Jared’s eyebrows shoot up as he takes a step towards him. “Insane? I was insane when I accepted this deal and came here. Look Mr Ackles, I never had a father to tell me what to do, but it’s definitely not gonna be you who will put a finger in my face and tell me what I should or shouldn’t do with my life. I don’t need scraps, okay? Not even yours.”

Jared rushes out of his room, he’s so angry he doesn’t even know what the hell is he doing, only needing to _get away_. Jared runs down the stairs with Alan yelling his name after him, but Jared is faster and within seconds he is out the door. He doesn’t know what to do or where to go, all he needs to do is to get as far away from the house as possible, he needs to clear his head. Jared walks fast for a while, occasionally looking behind him to make sure Alan isn’t coming after him, until he reaches an avenue. He flags down a cab, and gives him directions. It’s the first place Jared can think of, and he knows it’s the perfect place to go for now, so he can have some quiet time to think. He has no idea what he’s gonna do from then on, but for now it’s the best idea, he needs to be alone for a while. As the guy starts the drive, Jared collapses against the seat and takes a deep breath, some tears falling free. He wishes things weren’t so hard, it’s like the whole world is against him and he’s truly exhausted. Jared places a hand on his belly, rubbing it and thinking about his daughter so he can ground himself. What a mess his life has become.

_ **Jensen** _

“Jared is _gone_? What the fuck dad, why?” Jensen looks at Alan with widened eyes, not quite believing what he’s hearing. After his argument with Jared, Jensen had decided to go to his room and take a shower, clear his mind a bit before he went after Jared to talk again. But when he went to Jared’s room he found it empty so he went downstairs looking for him. That’s when Jensen found Alan, who looked stressed and told him the news.

Alan sighs. “We had a discussion.”

Jensen rolls his eyes, why is his dad suddenly arguing with everyone? “What did you tell him, dad?”

Alan shakes his head. “Now it’s not the time for this, we need to find Jared because of your mother!”

Jensen fishes his phone out of his pocket. “I’m gonna call Chad.”

“I’ve tried, his phone is turned off.”

Jensen narrows his eyes at Alan and points a finger at him. “I’m gonna go after him, then. But listen to me dad. If something happens to Jared, I will never forgive you.”

Jensen takes off then, getting in his car to go try and find Jared. His heart is beating a mile a minute, he has some idea what his father told Jared based on their own discussion. And he can clearly picture Jared getting pissed about it and taking off. Jensen prays that Jared didn’t go too far, he couldn’t have… right? Jensen tries calling him a thousand times, but all of them go to voicemail. Jensen leaves one desperate message.

_“Jay, please. Answer me, I need to know where you are. We are gonna fix this, I promise you. I… Jared please, come back.”_

Jensen drives around for a while, trying to see if he spots Jared somewhere but so far nothing. He then parks the car at some random street, trying to call Jared again but once more unsuccessful. Jensen buries his head in his hands on the steering wheel. His mind travels, he thinks about their first kiss and how amazing it was, how connected they felt at that moment, at that place.

Jensen suddenly sits back up as an idea strikes him. What if…

Jensen starts the car again and drives to the Botanical Garden. Jared has said on more than one occasion how he loved that place, so maybe that’s where he went for some time to himself. Jensen hopes he’s right.

When Jensen arrives at the Garden, he briskly walks to the lake, always glancing around to see if he can see Jared somewhere. But when Jensen approaches the lake, his heart skips a beat. He can spot Jared from here, sitting right by the lake, his back turned to him and Jensen has no doubts it’s him. Jensen smiles in relief, his eyes tearing up just a bit. He closes the distance between them until he’s standing right behind Jared, who is quietly watching the lake.

“Jared?”

Jared’s back stiffens instantly, and he looks behind him. When he spots Jensen, his eyes widen.

“Jensen?”

Jensen lets out a deep breath. “God Jared, I finally found you! I was desperate trying to find you, I’ve been worried sick!”

Jared purses his lips and gets up, crossing his arms in front of him. “I… I needed to be alone for a while, Jensen.”

Jensen nods. “And you chose this very place to do it.”

Jared shrugs. “Yeah, well… it’s the first place I could think of. Brings me peace, I don’t know.”

Jensen stares at Jared intensely for a few moments. “Were you thinking about us?”

Jared lowers his head. “There are so many things in my mind Jen, I…”

Jensen doesn’t let Jared finish. He throws all caution to the wind and acts on instinct, can’t hold himself anymore. He surges forward and grabs Jared’s face with both hands, fusing their lips together. Jared takes a step back in surprise, but after a heartbeat kisses him back, placing his hands on Jensen’s waist. They get lost in each other for a few moments, Jensen savoring Jared’s delicious taste, realizing once and again how much he loves Jared, how this is the only thing that feels amazing, that feels _right_. Jensen decides then and there that he doesn’t want to ever let Jared go, he can’t. The mere possibility of losing Jared…Just the idea of Jared going away crushes Jensen completely.

Jensen can’t do this anymore. Jared is his home. And for Jensen, it’s finally time to go home.

Jared pulls back from the kiss, giving Jensen a pained look and speaking in a whisper. “Jensen…”

Jensen frames Jared’s face with both hands and looks deeply into his eyes, swallowing hard as he gathers up all the courage and strength inside him.

“I love you, Jared.” Jared’s eyes widen and Jensen goes on, his heart beating a mile a minute. “I love you, and just thinking about being away from you got me desperate. I can’t be without you anymore Jay, I _can’t_.”

Jared looks back at him intensely for a few moments, then uses his hands to lower Jensen’s from his face. “What about your wedding, Jen?”

The answer is very easy. “I’ll talk to Danneel, she is gonna hate me yes, but I can’t marry her. I don’t love her Jared, I never did, and only recently I’ve been figuring this out. How can I marry a woman when I love someone else? This isn’t fair to anyone!”

Jared sighs. “Danneel isn’t the only problem, Jen. What about your dad? He would never accept us, and the last thing I want in this world is to upset Donna.”

Jensen takes a step closer and looks at Jared intensely again. “Jay… do you love me?” Jared doesn’t answer at first, but Jensen can see his eyes getting moist. “Because if you do, we can do anything, we can face it all together.”

Jared purses his lips again, as if he’s trying to hold back tears. He looks at Jensen for a few seconds, and finally gives him a smile. “Of course I do, Jen. I love you so, so much.” Jensen’s heart almost bursts out of his chest, but Jared’s smile turns sad. “But you’re forgetting that I’m pregnant, Jen.”

Jared walks past Jensen, but he takes Jared’s hand and makes him turn around again. “Jared, I’m gonna take care of you and your daughter.” Jensen has just decided this but it’s already the best decision he has ever made. It feels so _right_, it’s suddenly the thing Jensen wants the most. It doesn’t matter that he is not the biological father of Jared’s baby, he feels as if he were. It’s who he wants to be. Jensen wants to belong to Jared, but it goes deeper than that. He never saw himself as a father, but now he wants to be one. The father of Jared’s daughter. Hopefully, _their_ daughter. The idea brings an immense joy to Jensen’s heart. “I promise you, Jared. I want both of you. I’m gonna talk to Danneel as soon as possible and I’m gonna call off this wedding just to be with you.” Jensen cradles Jared’s face with a hand, wiping a tear that has fallen. “I won’t abandon you, Jay. I won’t let you go.”

Jared frowns, clearly emotional, and more tears fall from his face. Jensen feels his own eyes moistening. Instead of answering Jared closes the distance between them and their lips meet in another kiss, this time wet with tears, and filled with love and promises of a future. Jensen wraps an arm around Jared’s waist to bring him closer and caresses the side of his belly to show he really means it. Jensen loves Jared and he loves this child too. And he cannot wait to have both of them to himself forever and completely.

*

Jensen drives them home, Jared has been quiet ever since they walked away from the lake, lost in thoughts. Jensen takes a chance and covers Jared’s hand with his own in the car, rubbing his thumb over the back of it. Jared turns to him and gives Jensen a small smile. Jensen takes that as a good sign even if he can tell Jared is nervous. So he brings Jared’s hand up to his lips and plants a kiss on it. Then he lets go for a moment of Jared’s hand to rub his belly gently, offering him a smile.

“It’s gonna be okay, Jay.”

Jared grimaces. “I’m kinda scared.”

Jensen stops at a red light and reaches out to frame Jared’s face, caressing his cheek. “I am too. But I want to be with you and nothing will change that. I promise.”

Jared smiles a bit wider at that and Jensen takes his hand again as he continues the drive home.

As Jensen pulls up in the driveway and turns the engine off, the front door opens and Donna rushes out.

“Oh thank God you found Jared, son! Your father told me what happened and I was so worried!”

Jared gets out of the car and Donna gives him a hug.

“I’m sorry I got you guys so worried. I just needed some time by myself, that’s all.”

Alan walks towards them and exchanges a look with Jensen. Then he turns to Jared.

“Yeah Jared, it’s good to have you back. Please think twice before you do something like that again.”

Jared looks at Alan and purses his lips. “I will, Mr. Ackles. Now if you excuse me, I’m gonna go up to my room.”

Jared walks inside and Donna follows him. Alan turns to Jensen and wants to know more details about where Jared was, what did he say. Jensen doesn’t feel like talking about it, so he brushes his father off. Alan tries to force the subject but Jensen isn’t having it.

“Sorry dad, I’m tired. I want to go up to my room and have a quiet rest of the day. I know mom has a chemo session today, you two should probably head to the hospital soon.”

Jensen doesn’t wait for an answer as he walks inside. He goes to his room to be alone for a while, he needs to sort things out. The wedding needs to be called off, that’s for sure. Jensen is supposed to get married in a week but there’s not a chance in the world he is walking down that aisle. He feels more confident now, knowing once and for all that he wants to be with Jared. He knows it won’t be easy but he is willing to go against the world for that man. Jensen grabs one of the pictures he took of Jared and studies it. He chuckles thinking how he despised Jared not too long ago, Jensen didn’t want anything to do with Jared or his baby, but now the thing he wants more in this world is a future with both of them in it.

Jensen picks up his phone and calls Danneel, telling her they need to talk. She says she’s running some errands but will come by later.

Jensen realizes he hasn’t eaten anything today, and now that everything has quieted down he notices he’s actually hungry. So he orders some burgers from a food delivery app and thankfully it doesn’t take too long to arrive. He gets the food, tips the delivery guy and goes upstairs again, but this time he heads to Jared’s room, barely managing to knock with his hands full of paper bags and sodas.

“Come in!”

“Open the door for me, I can’t!”

A few seconds later Jared swings the door open with a puzzled look on his face, then looks down at the food Jensen is showing him.”Brought lunch for us. Are you in?”

The confusion fades away and Jared flashes him a smile. “Food? Definitely.”

They eat lunch together on Jared’s bed, watching TV and talking nonsense. Jensen realizes he loves this simplicity, how things with Jared don’t have to be complicated. Jensen looks at Jared’s growing belly and can’t help but imagining a little one in bed with them, stealing fries. Jensen smiles fondly at a memory that hasn’t even happened yet.

Once they’re done and collected all the trash, trying to make Jared’s bed look presentable again, Jensen looks outside and has an idea.

“I think it’s time we take some new pictures for your pregnancy album, what do you say? It’s a gorgeous day outside.”

Jared follows his gaze outside, and then looks back at Jensen. “Yeah, okay. By the way… when are you planning on talking to Danneel?”

Jensen shrugs. “She’s coming over later today. I don’t want to wait any longer, Jay.”

Jared smiles. “I hope it goes well. Well, things like this can’t go well but you know. I like Danneel, I wouldn’t want for her to be hurt.”

Jensen closes the distance between them and plants a chaste kiss to Jared’s lips. “She would be hurt a lot more in the end, marrying someone who doesn’t love her.”

Jared gives him a half smile. “True.”

“Good, so let’s get to action. I’ll go get my camera, I’ll meet you downstairs in a few.”

Jared and Jensen spend a nice afternoon taking pictures, Jensen makes Jared show off his pregnant belly to the camera and it brings a warmth to his heart to see how it has grown ever since their last photoshoot. And it’s like Jared gets more and more beautiful as his baby grows, he has that glow around him. Jensen takes a lot of photos, directing Jared in some poses he thinks are gonna work great, but also allows Jared to be spontaneous, those are always the pictures Jensen loves the most. And when Jared is doing that, when he’s just _being_, Jensen loves to admire him. He gets lost in thoughts just looking at Jared, how incredibly gorgeous he is. He craves to kiss him, to touch him freely, to have all of Jared to himself. Jensen can’t wait to sort everything out so Jared and him can just _be_.

Later they sit on a loveseat as Jensen shows Jared the pictures, and he loves them all, complimenting Jensen once again on his talent, on how great he is in capturing the moment.

Loretta interrupts them apologetically, letting Jensen know Danneel is in his room. Jensen suddenly feels nervous and turns to Jared as Loretta leaves.

“I guess this is it.”

Jared gives Jensen an encouraging smile and takes his hand, giving it a squeeze. “You’re gonna be fine. Just follow your heart, Jen. Do it what it tells you to do, whatever it is.”

Jensen squeezes back, returning the smile. His heart is leading him to Jared, and that gives him the courage he needs. So he leaves his camera with Jared, who still wants to see more pictures, and goes upstairs. He takes a deep breath and enters his room. Danneel is on his bed, going through some of the pictures he took when Jared and him went around town.

“Hey Danni.” Jensen tries to force a smile as his heart beats a mile a minute, and Danneel looks up, an indecipherable look on her face.

“Hey Jensen. Just found this on your dresser, hope you don’t mind me going through them.”

Jensen shakes his head, sitting down close to her. “Not at all. Do you like them? I took them the other day, felt like I captured some nice moments.”

Danneel shrugs. “They’re okay. But anyone can take those, right? I mean, they’re just pictures, nothing too special about it.”

Jensen frowns, feeling a pang of hurt hearing someone he cares about speaking like this about his work, like there’s nothing special about it. It makes Jensen even more sure about his decision, he remembers the many times Jared has said Jensen has an eye for this, that he captures the perfect moment, that his pictures are different. So he takes a deep breath.

“Look Danni…”

“I saw you and Jared.”

The words die in Jensen’s throat and his heart skips a beat. She _saw_ them? Jensen tries to remember if he kissed Jared anywhere Danneel could have seen them but comes up with nothing. “You… saw us? Where?”

Danneel sets the pictures down and studies Jensen, giving him a sad smile. “I arrived a bit earlier and heard you guys in the backyard. You were taking pictures of him, and just the way you looked at him, the way you smiled as you looked and talked to him, how your eyes shined… you never ever looked at me like that, Jensen. Then I came upstairs and looked out at you two sitting together, going through the photos on your camera, how intimate you looked… it took me a little while to realize why I was so disturbed by it but I get it now. It was never this way between us, Jensen. I’ve been so focused on our wedding, on having the perfect ceremony, the perfect reception, the perfect flowers and wedding dress, that I didn’t realize that I don’t have what matters the most. The perfect fiance that truly loves me.”

Jensen just looks at Danneel because he doesn’t have anything to say to that. She cocks his head to the side as she goes on.

“Do you truly love me, Jensen? Can you see us spending the rest of our life together, as a happy couple?”

Jensen purses his lips and studies Danneel for a few heartbeats before shaking his head. “No Danni, I’m sorry. I adore you, you are a fantastic person, but I don’t love you the way I should. And that’s actually why I called you here today, to tell you this. This can’t go on.”

Danneel nods, her eyes welling up, and she takes Jensen’s hand in her. “I’m sorry I was so involved in the preparations that I failed to realize that. I just wanted the perfect wedding.”

Jensen smiles sadly and brings Danneel’s hand to his mouth, planting a chaste kiss on it. “Danni, a wedding party lasts only for a day. Then you’re left with a whole new life ahead of you, with a person that is supposed to love you and vice versa. What you deserve is a perfect _marriage_. And I can’t give you that, I’m sorry.”

Danneel offers him a smile even as a tear escapes her eye. “I know that now. I can’t give you that either.” She picks up a picture of Jared among the ones scattered on his bed and studies it for a while, then looks back up at Jensen. “Do you love Jared?”

Jensen hesitates for only a moment before nodding, his heart feeling warm. “With all my heart.”

Danneel nods. “Okay. That’s... well. Didn’t expect that, actually. He’s having your brother’s baby, doesn’t that complicate things?”

Jensen shrugs. “Yeah, it could. I know it won’t be easy for us but I’m willing to fight anyone for him. I’m sorry, Danni. It just happened. Before I realized what I was feeling, I couldn’t get it out of me anymore. And truthfully, I don’t ever want to.”

Danneel purses her lips for a while as she looks at their joined hands. “Do you think I’m ever gonna find someone like this?”

Jensen smiles at her, placing a finger under her chin and lifting her face so she looks at him. “I have no doubt. You’re an amazing girl who deserves to find a guy who loves you just like you deserve. And then you can have the most beautiful dream wedding that you want so much. By the way, if it’s not much to ask, I wish we could remain friends. I really care about you.”

Danneel nods. “Yeah, I’d like that too. I just… just need some time to wrap my head around things, to get used to everything.”

“It’s perfectly understandable. I guess now we tell everyone the wedding is not happening. Do you want back-up telling your family?”

Danneel shakes her head. “Nah, it’s okay. I got it. Good luck to you as well.” Danneel takes off her engagement ring and hands it to Jensen. He purses his lips and takes it, studying it for a moment before placing it on the nightstand. Jeff had helped choosing that as well.

Jensen gets up and brings Danneel with him, pulling her for a long hug. He plants a kiss on the top of her head. “You’re an amazing girl, and I like you very much. Never forget that, okay?”

*

Jensen walks Danneel to her car and kisses her cheek as a goodbye, then watches her drive away. He stays in place lost in thoughts for a few moments, processing everything. This went smoother than he had predicted, it’s good that Danneel also realized they weren’t meant to be and they called off the wedding in time. It’s one less obstacle in his way to be with Jared.

Speaking of, Jensen goes back to the backyard where Jared is still at. He’s on the loveseat staring into the distance, and Jensen sits down next to him, offering a small smile. Jared startles.

“Hey Jen! How was it?”

Jensen sighs and tells Jared everything, how it was a mutual decision since Danneel realized Jensen didn’t love her.

“I guess we are kinda obvious then, huh?” Jared asks scrunching up his nose, and Jensen chuckles.

“Yeah, I guess. I’m totally a goner.”

Jared smiles but it has a sad tone to it. “Is she gonna be okay?”

Jensen nods. “Yeah, she needs some time but I know she will. We made the right choice.”

“Let’s just hope everything else goes as smoothly as this.”

Jensen doubts, but doesn’t say anything. He knows Jared and he are in for a battle, but Jensen feels ready to face it. For Jared he’s willing to do anything.

**TO BE CONTINUED...**


	13. Chapter 13

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey guys! I want to thank you all as usual for reading my fic and for all your lovely comments and inputs! Makes my day to read them all! I have a feeling you're gonna enjoy this chapter, it has a scene I really like and I was eager to post it! Please as always, if you can spare some time, let me know your thoughts!

_**Jensen** _

Jensen is dreading telling his parents about the wedding. He knows how much they were counting on him marrying Danneel, and he’s sure they will be disappointed. But he needs to do it fast, the wedding is supposed to happen in a week and Jensen needs to contact all his guests to also let them know it was called off.

After dinner that same day he asks Donna and Alan into the office to break the news. Jensen goes straight to the point as he stares at both his parents.

“I asked you two to come here to tell you I’m not gonna marry Danneel anymore.” Alan’s eyes widen and Donna gasps, bringing a hand to her mouth. “I know you won’t agree with it, you were counting on this wedding, but it’s off. Danni and I decided it together, we realized we don’t love each other enough like a husband and wife should. We just can’t get married for the sake of it and both be unhappy in our marriage. I’m sorry it happened so close to the wedding day, but it’s better to do it now than to get a divorce later. Because that was definitely happening, eventually.” Jensen takes a deep breath before continuing, he can see his father is not happy at all with this. “The decision is already made, there’s absolutely no turning back. I just thought you guys should hear it first.”

Jensen waits as both of them recover from the shock, and eventually Donna gets up. She cups Jensen’s face with a hand. “You really sure about this, baby?”

Jensen nods. “Yeah, mom. I am. One hundred percent.”

Dona gives him a sad smile. “Okay, then. I just want you to be happy, son. If you are sure this is for the best then okay. Like you said, better to end this now, before the wedding. I wouldn’t want you to get a divorce. I’m sure you’re gonna find the perfect girl someday.”

Donna hugs him, and Jensen stares at his father who is standing behind her. Jensen knows Alan is also thinking about what Donna said, and he knows what’s in Jensen’s mind. He has already found the one. It’s just not a girl.

Donna pulls away and after kissing Jensen’s cheek, she leaves the room and Jensen moves to follow her. Alan calls him but Jensen shakes his head.

“I don’t want to talk about that anymore. Sorry.”

Jensen is glad he has told his parents but he still has to face more people. And he’s dreading a particular one.

*

_“You did what?”_

Jensen sighs as he looks at Jeff in their office. He had decided to come to the agency the following morning to take care of some business like he had promised Jeff he would, and decided to break the news to him when Jeff started talking about picking up Jensen’s suit for the wedding.

Jensen raises an eyebrow as he stares at Jeff from across the room. “What you just heard. Danneel and I decided to call off the wedding. We aren’t together anymore.”

“But… but you can’t do it Jensen! You _have_ to marry Danneel, you two are perfect for each other!”

Jeff’s expression morphs into something close to anger, and Jensen is taken aback by it.

“No I really don’t, Jeff. I don’t have to marry Danneel if I don’t want to, there’s nothing forcing me. And no, we aren’t perfect for each other. Actually, she was the one who brought it up first, she saw the obvious. She could tell we wouldn’t be happy and I went with it. I also didn’t want to go through with this wedding. It’s actually the best decision we could have made.”

Jeff shakes his head, his eyes widened. “But… you can’t Jensen--I…”

But Jensen has had enough. “Look Jeff, I just wanted you to hear from me because you deserve this. The decision has been made, just wanted to let you know. I’ve gotta go now.”

Jensen leaves the office without looking back. Arriving home, he spends the afternoon calling people to let them know about it and also cancelling the services they had hired for the reception. When all of that is taken care of, he joins Jared in the backyard so he can relax a bit after the stress of the day. They sit together on a big loveseat as Jensen tells Jared everything that happened.

“Well, I think it’s very brave of you to do this. The easy path was to go through with the wedding since it was so close. It takes courage to call off something like that.”

Jared offers Jensen an encouraging smile, which he reciprocates. The moment is broken by quick footsteps approaching, and an angry voice calling his name.

“Jensen!”

Jensen turns around and finds Danneel with tears streaming down her cheeks, her always perfect make up all ruined, an angry look on her face. Jensen is up on an instant. “Danni, what happened?”

“You’re having an _affair_ with Jeff, that’s what is happening! How could you do this, Jensen?”

Jensen’s jaw drops, and his heart stops. He looks at Jared, who is perplexed as well. He also gets up and looks at both of them. “I’ll leave you two alone.”

Jared walks away and Jensen watches him for a few moments so he can try and get ready for this. When he eventually faces Danneel again, she’s staring angrily at him, her arms crossed in front of her, an eyebrow raised.

“So?”

Jensen purses his lips. “Danni, let’s sit down so we can talk about this.”

She shakes her head. “I don’t want to sit down Jensen! I want to know the truth!”

“Danni, we are gonna talk. But please, sit down with me.”

Jensen takes a sit and Danneel lets out an annoyed breath but follows him. “Is it true, Jensen? Did you really have an affair with Jeff? While planning to marry me?”

“First I want to know who told you this.”

Danneel bits her bottom lip. “It was Jeff himself. He came to me after you told him about the wedding cancelation, he wanted me to come after you to make up and go on with the wedding. When I told him no, it was a mutual decision and I was already decided, he threw it in my face about you two just so he could humiliate me. How could you do this to me, Jensen? Do you have any idea how stupid I feel?”

Jensen bites back his anger at knowing Jeff told everything to Danneel. He’s gonna hear from Jensen later but right now he focus on the more urgent matter. Jensen sighs and looks at Danneel, leaning forward and resting his elbows on his knees.

“Look Danni, I’m so sorry. Jeff and I go way back, we have had something on and off for years now. I never saw it as anything serious, it was more about two friends fooling around. Now I realize though, how wrong it was, going behind your back like this. There’s not much to say really, just that I’m sorry for hurting you. I really am.”

Danneel looks at him with hurt in her eyes. “Would this have kept happening if we got married Jensen? Would you cheat on me forever with him?”

Jensen sighs. “I don’t know, Danni. I may seem like a complete asshole, but the old me probably would. I see things a little differently now, and I can promise you that I loathe the old me for it. You don’t deserve this. And I’m really sorry you had to hear from Jeff like this.”

“Damn right I don’t deserve this Jensen! Nobody should be cheated on like this! What about Jared? Does he know about Jeff? Are you going behind his back too?”

Jensen shakes his head. “No I’m not. Jared knows it, yes. But we aren’t together, not yet anyway. There’s too much going on, we just broke up our engagement. And I don’t want to keep this up with Jeff anymore. I want to be a better person. And I hope that someday you can forgive me.”

Danneel is silent for a long time, processing everything. Eventually she lets out a breath. “I don’t know, maybe someday. It’s still too raw, I need some time to process everything. Thank you for being honest with me.”

“It was the least I could do. I owe that to you.”

Danneel nods and gets up. “I’ll get going now. I need to be alone for a while. See you, Jensen.”

Jensen watches Danneel leaving, he stays seated for a while but eventually he’s filled with a lot of anger. Jared comes back to the backyard, approaching him tentatively.

“How was it?”

Jensen barely hears Jared, he rushes back inside the house and grabs his car keys.

“Jensen, where are you going?” Jared is right behind him, a worried look on his face.

“To talk to Jeff. He told Danneel about us and now he’s gonna hear from me.”

Jensen doesn’t even wait for Jared to say anything, he’s out of the house and in his car in seconds. Jeff went too far and he’s gonna get what he deserves for this.

*

Jensen rings the doorbell more than once, impatient for Jeff to open the door. When he does, Jensen storms inside the apartment.

“Jensen?” Jeff closes the door and frowns at him.

Jensen faces Jeff and rubs a hand over his mouth. “Jeff, we need to have a serious conversation. We need to settle things once and for all.”

“Why are you talking to me like this, Jensen?”

Jensen ignores him. “How dare you go after Danneel to tell her we had an affair behind her back? What the fuck is wrong with you?? Do you take pleasure in hurting people? Is that it?”

Jeff sighs. “Okay, I admit it, it was over the top, I shouldn’t have talked to her but I was pissed when you said she decided to call off the wedding! When she told me there was no turning back I just threw everything in her face!”

Jensen scoffs, throwing his arms to the side. “Jeff, I told you it was a mutual decision! I don’t need you to defend my honor for the love of God! It was the best thing for me, if you were truly worried about me then you should be happy!”

Jeff’s expression hardens and he points a finger at Jared’s face. “No. Danneel is the right woman for you, Jensen!”

Jensen finally has had enough. “I don’t want or need a right woman for me, Jeff. I want to be with Jared. Jared is the one I’m in love with, the one I want to spend the rest of my life with.”

Jeff’s eyes widen. “Oh you’re in love with him? You want to play house, raise his child with him? That’s great, but that doesn’t mean we need to end what we have, Jensen! Our story is much bigger than that! We have something that’s old, and beautiful, and true!”

“And you ruined everything, Jeff! Can’t you see that?”

Jeff gives him a smug smile. “I’m still inside you, Jensen. Not even these sudden feelings for Jared, or whoever comes next, will erase me from your mind. I’m the most important person to you and always will be. I’m the only one who knows you like the back of my hand, I’m the one who cares about you.”

Jeff grabs Jensen’s jaw, but Jensen harshly grabs his arm and pulls it away from his face, holding it tight to make a point. “You don’t care about me Jeff, you care about yourself. This thing you do to me isn’t caring. It’s you being selfish, vain, manipulative. You’re desperate because now my life got out of your control and you can’t tolerate being frustrated and powerless.”

Jensen lets go of him and puts some distance between them. Jeff narrows his eyes. “If that’s how you feel, then why were you with me all these years?”

“I don’t know, maybe because I was immature, vain, flattered, because it was easy. What we had was too simple, camaradery, sex, we had fun, we laughed together, no strings attached.”

“Our relationship was very rich, Jensen.”

Jensen shakes his head. “No, it was very poor actually. Shallow. I had never realized that, I only did when I fell in love with Jared. I didn’t know this until I learned about a relationship based on love, without any futile interests.”

“What we had wasn’t futile!”

“Of course it was Jeff, come on! I thought it was so cool to be with someone older, experienced, and you wanted someone younger so you could feel young yourself!”

Jeff pokes at Jensen’s chest, hard. “I turned you into a man, Jensen. I made you who you are!”

Jensen shoves him away. “No, you _destroyed_ me! You tried to turn me into a cold cynical asshole and you _almost_ succeeded! But I’m more than that, Jeff. I’m way more than that and I can finally see it. We’re done.”

With that, Jensen storms off the apartment, Jeff screaming his name after him but Jensen slams the door behind him and hushes out as fast as he can. Damn Jeff. Jensen sits in his car and tries to calm down. He feels relieved for doing this, he can see now how toxic Jeff was to him. Now he truly did the right thing, he got it all out of his chest.

Jensen returns home feeling exhausted, it’s already late and everybody is in their rooms. He considers going to Jared’s room but it’s best for him to go get some rest and clear his mind a bit. Tomorrow is a brand new day.

_ **Jared** _

In the morning, Jared is alone in the house. Alan and Chad have gone to work, Donna has gone out with her friend Jackie, and Jensen had to go to the agency to take care of a few things. Jared had been worried yesterday when Danneel came over and said Jeff had told her about the affair he had with Jensen. He was mostly worried about Jensen when he stormed off to talk to Jeff. Jared actually thought Jeff would be able to manipulate Jensen again like he always did despite everything that Jensen said about wanting to be with Jared. But, to Jared's surprise, Jensen returned after a short while. He saw as Jensen parked in the driveway and he looked kind of pissed and tired, then went straight to his room. Jared even wanted to go talk to him, see how things went, but he had decided to leave Jensen alone for now, such an upheaval was a lot to process.

He still didn’t have the chance to talk to Jensen about his conversation with Jeff, since he left in a rush, but Jensen had promised him they would talk when he comes back. Jared decides to browse online for baby stuff, he really needs to start thinking about the layette and all the things he’s gonna need for when his girl comes.

The doorbell rings and Jared frowns, wondering who it could be. He sets the laptop he has been using aside and goes to the door. When he opens it, he takes a step back, his heart racing.

“Jeff? What are you doing here?”

Jeff’s expression gives Jared’s chills. He’s looking at Jared through narrowed eyelids, and takes a step inside, making Jared take several back in return.

“I came here to talk to you, Jared. Don’t worry, it’s gonna be quick.”

Jared instinctively places a protective hand on his belly, and Jeff’s gaze lands on it for a couple of heartbeats before he focuses on Jared’s face again.

“I just want to give you another warning Jared, since the first one didn’t have any effect, and I’m gonna say this only once more. You need to back away from Jensen. You’re not good for him, you’re here just because you’re after this family’s money and you managed to trick Jensen into believing you were actually a nice guy with all the good intentions. But I’m not buying it. I don’t know what’s wrong with you but if you insist on going after Jensen, I’m gonna find out. You need to learn how to honor the family that gave you shelter and stay in your lane because you may regret it if you don’t.”

Jeff gives Jared a smirk that makes Jared’s blood run cold. He feels frozen on the spot, his throat dry at the very obvious threat, but he manages to point a finger outside and clears his throat.

“Get out of here! You realized you can’t control Jensen anymore and you can’t stand that. Your boytoy started thinking on his own and you just can’t have that. I don’t want to hear anything else from you anymore, please just leave!”

Jeff places a hand on the doorknob, still staring at Jared, and points a finger at him. “Jensen is mine, Jared. That is not up for discussion. You’ve been warned.”

Jeff slams the door behind him and Jared hurries to the couch, collapsing on it. He leans forward and lowers his head, trying to take deep breaths. He feels tears pooling in his eyes and his heart is racing. Jeff just threatened Jared, very explicitly. Not only Jared has to deal with the threat of Justin coming for him at any moment, now he also needs to watch out for Jeff. Jared feels short of breath, his vision blurs, panic washing over him. Jared tries to breath but it’s like the air can’t get to his lungs, he feels like the walls are closing in around him and he’s desperate.

Eventually, and Jared has no idea how much time actually passed, someone is crouching down in front of him and calling his name. It feels muffled and Jared tries to look up and focus on the face in front of him.

“Jared? What is happening? Please, talk to me!”

Jared blinks a few times and realizes it’s Jensen who is talking to him, and he instantly gets up, putting some distance between himself and Jensen.

“Jeff just paid me a visit, Jensen! That’s what happened!”

Jensen’s eyes widen and he tries to come closer, but Jared holds up a hand and Jensen stays put. “What did he say?”

“He said I need to get away from you!” Jared is screaming now, completely hysterical but he’s too out of it to give a damn. “He threatened me if I don’t, said he knows I’m only here to take advantage of your family and that I’m fooling you! He said I’m gonna regret it if I don’t back away and leave you alone, said he’s gonna find out things about me and not only I have to worry about Justin but now there’s Jeff as well and I can’t do this anymore Jensen! I’m under a tremendous amount of stress, first everything with Justin, then I lost my friend, then I have to look at your mom everyday and lie to her about this baby, I have no idea what I’m going to do if your mom finds out and kicks me out, I have absolutely no place to go, then I fall in love with you of all people just to have your lover come at me and threaten me! Jensen this is too much for me! I’m pregnant, I’m having a child soon and I can’t be under this stress all the fucking time! I just can’t, I _can’t_!”

Jared finishes and he feels tears falling, his chest is heavy and he feels dizzy. Jensen takes a hesitant step forward.

“Jay, please. Let’s talk about this, it’s gonna be fine. I promise.”

Jared holds up a hand. “No Jensen. Right now everything is the complete opposite of fine. I can’t deal with all this shit. I just want to have a quiet pregnancy, I want to focus 100% on my girl so she can grow in peace inside me and then when it’s time, that she’s born healthy. I need this. I think--I think it’s better if we end what we didn’t even start yet. At least for now. Please respect this, Jensen. I love you but I need peace and quiet now. This is too much for me to handle at this moment. And I need to be alone for a while.”

Jared feels ready to collapse so with one last pained look at Jensen, he rushes upstairs to his room. Jared throws himself on his bed feeling completely drained. He allows the tears to fall, sobbing on the pillow. It feels like everything is piling up on him, suffocating him. Jared truly loves Jensen with all his heart and more, but for now he needs to focus on his baby. It’s too much to deal and Jared just can’t do it right now. He ends up falling asleep from pure emotional exhaustion.

*

Jared wakes up a few hours later, and spends some time getting back to full consciousness. He still feels tired from all the stress, but it was good to sleep for a while. Jared blinks a few times and notices a folded piece of paper on his nightstand. Sitting up, he grabs the paper and opens it, noticing Jensen’s handwriting. His heart starts beating faster.

_Jay,_

_You are right, you need some time to focus on yourself and your baby girl. It hurts me but I’ll give you the time you need, I’m sorry to cause you all this trouble. I’m gonna be staying at an apartment we have for a few days, I think it’s gonna be for the best if we are apart for a while. Don’t feel guilty thinking you should leave instead of me, it’s really okay. I’m gonna use this time for myself as well. _

_However if you need anything or if you change your mind, I’m gonna be here. No pressure though. _

_Love you,_

_Jen._

Under Jensen’s name, there’s the address for the apartment. Jared feels awful that Jensen left despite what he said in the letter. He also doesn’t want Jensen to go, and ends up feeling selfish. Jared decided to end whatever they had for now, and yet he wants Jensen close. What the fuck is he supposed to do?

Jared waits for Chad to come back from work and goes to meet his friend at the boathouse. When Chad takes the first look at Jared’s face, he senses something is up.

“Jare, what’s wrong?”

Jared sighs and sits down on the couch, Chad joining him. He tells his friend absolutely everything that happened. When he finishes, Chad studies him for a long time.

“So, lemme get this straight.” Chad purses his lips and taps them with his forefinger. “Jeff came to you and told you to back away from Jensen… and you did?”

Jared scoffs. “Of course I did! What was I supposed to do?”

Chad gets up and throws his arms to the sides, looking down at Jared. “You need to face Jeff, Jared. You have to get back at him!”

Jared gets up as well, feeling exasperated. “And how the fuck am I supposed to do that, Chad?”

Chad lifts an eyebrow. “Isn’t it obvious, Jare? You need to be with Jensen.”

Jared’s eyes widen. “W-what?”

Chad clasps his hands in front of him, trying to get Jared to understand. “Jared, listen to me. The way you have to stand up for yourself is to be with Jensen for real, because as long as you keep hiding, as long as you keep Jensen away, Jeff will be powerful. Jensen is the leverage Jeff has, he_ needs_ to be in control of Jensen. Jare, that’s why Jeff wanted for Jensen to marry Danneel so much. He knows Jensen never loved her, he was only doing it to have a trophy wife and do ‘the right thing’. Come on, you told me Jeff was the one who introduced them! He thought everything through. If Jensen married Danneel, Jeff would have power over him forever, would keep having an affair with Jensen for as long as he wanted because he’s obsessed with him.

“But Jared, _Jensen loves you_. He loves you like he never loved Danneel or Jeff. And Jeff knows it, he can tell like everybody else who has two eyes can. Jeff knows you’re dangerous to him, because if Jensen feels confident enough to be with you, Jeff will lose him. He already did. Come on, Jensen would rather stay at home with you playing board games than to go out with him. And that was when you two still didn’t have anything going. Jeff wasn’t counting on you coming into the picture, opening Jensen’s eyes to everything and showing him a true feeling, so Jeff lost the control he had over Jensen. Jeff isn’t a threat to you, Jare. You are a threat to _him_. You’re the one person who could take Jensen away from him. So Jare, what you need to do is to stand up for yourself and make your move in order to get what you want, and you can’t allow Jeff to get you down anymore.” Chad takes a step closer and grabs Jared’s bicep to get his point across. “Jare, you need to fight for your happiness. You and Jensen are perfect for each other and lemme tell you, that’s something I never ever saw coming. But you are. And you deserve to be happy, Jare. Don’t let Jeff win. Because if you do as he said and let Jensen go, he will.”

Jared stays quiet as he tries to process everything Chad said. He excuses himself and tells his friend he needs to think everything through and decide what he’s going to do. Jared sits by the pool and runs Chad’s words in his mind over and over, at the same time as trying to look at all the pieces of the puzzle. Jared loses track of time as his mind wanders, and in the end, the answer comes. It’s actually surprisingly easy, like it has been inside him all along.

Jared knows what he needs to do.

_ **Jensen** _

Jensen lies in bed staring at the ceiling, thinking. Why are things so fucked up? He can’t believe Jeff went after Jared, he crossed all possible lines. Jensen even considered going after him again after leaving, but the truth is, he’s so tired. Jared was right, everything is too stressful right now. After Jared had a panic attack in front of Jensen, screaming hysterically at him, Jensen saw he needed to leave. He couldn’t let Jared go through that again, it was too much on him and like Jared himself said, he needs peace and quiet. It was a hard decision, leaving him and coming to his apartment. Jensen hates the idea of not seeing Jared as much, but he will give him that space. Jensen had decided to write a letter to Jared instead of talking face to face, and left it by his bed while Jared was sleeping. Jensen had spent a long time just watching him, lost in thoughts. He brushed a lock of hair out of Jared’s face, wishing things could work out between them. Jensen had planted a gentle kiss on Jared’s forehead before leaving.

Jensen sighs, thinking about everything. How he was such a selfish asshole up until not too long ago, who didn’t care about cheating on his fianceé and let himself being manipulated by his lover. It took Jared crashing into his life without any warning for Jensen to see things from a different perspective, for him to finally learn what it felt like to have a genuine love for someone. Jared made Jensen reach deep into himself and pull the true Jensen out. Jared is the best thing that ever happened to him. It just hurts so much not to be able to be with him.

Jensen lies like this for what seems like hours, not being able to find the strength to do anything else. Eventually the doorbell rings, and Jensen has an urge to just not answer it. Jeff probably learned he’s here and came after him. The doorbell rings again and Jensen sighs, making an effort to get up and go answer the door. The annoyed face Jensen has on immediately dissipates the moment he sees who’s at the door.

“Jared?” His voice comes out almost as a whisper and his eyes widen as he looks at Jared’s beautiful face.

Jared gives Jensen a beautiful dimpled smile and takes a timid step inside. “Hey Jen… I came here to see if it’s not too late to ask you to be with me.”

Jensen’s jaw drops. “Can--can you repeat it please, I think I misunderstood.”

“I want to be with you, Jen.”

Jensen stares at Jensen dumbstruck for a couple of heartbeats before his brain catches up with what Jared just said. He’s looking at Jensen expectantly, and instead of saying something Jensen just pulls Jared inside, shoving the door closed behind them and pulling Jared to him, wrapping his arms forcefully around him and finally covering his lips with his own. Jared hugs him back tightly and they kiss passionately for a few moments, Jensen allowing himself to get lost in Jared, to taste him, to feel him. He can’t believe Jared is here, it feels like a dream, the most amazing and incredible dream.

Eventually Jared breaks the kiss and takes a couple of steps back, laughing nervously. “Sorry it took me some time to do this, I was having an inner debate with my morals and stuff.”

Jensen takes a step closer and raises an eyebrow. “Since when is love a sin?”

Jared purses his lips. “I know Jen, but our situation is complicated, I don’t want to hurt people.”

Jensen pulls Jared to him and wraps his arms around his waist. “We can’t sacrifice our happiness because of others. That’s why Danneel and I broke up, I would end up hurting her even more by actually marrying her. I love_ you_, Jay. And only you.”

Jared smiles at him and places both hands around Jensen’s neck. “So, if you still want me… I’m yours.”

Jensen smiles so hard he thinks his face is gonna break, and feels tears pooling in his eyes. He touches Jared’s forehead with his own, framing Jared’s face with a hand. “You are what I want the most in this life.” Jensen plants a kiss on Jared’s lips and murmurs into them. “I want to scream to everyone how much I love you.” He showers Jared’s face with kisses, anywhere he can reach, murmuring _I love you_ over and over and they hug each other so tight, trying to fuse themselves as one.

“I can’t believe you’re here,” Jensen murmurs into Jared’s neck, who holds him even tighter.

Eventually Jared pulls away just so he can look at Jensen. “Jen, we still have some issues to deal with. There’s your mom and this secret for example.”

Jensen gives him a small smile. “I know. But if we are together in this, I know we are gonna be okay. We are a team, right?”

Jared nods. “Damn right we are. And for now, I wish you would come back home with me. It’s awful without you there. Plus, Donna told me to bring you back with me.”

Jensen’s eyes widen. “You told my mom you were coming here?”

Jared shrugs. “Just ran into her on my way out and told her I’d stop by and see how you were doing, if you were okay since you wanted to spend time alone. She then told me that, because your mama misses you.” Jared checks the time on Jensen’s watch. “In fact if we hurry, we may even arrive in time for dinner!”

Jensen laughs. “I guess we need to feed the growing boy, huh!”

“Hey! Don’t forget I’m pregnant please, I’m eating for two! There’s a growing girl inside this growing boy!”

Jensen looks down with a fond smile, rubbing a hand over Jared’s belly and feeling all warm inside. “That I could never forget.” Jensen looks back up and finds Jared mirroring his smile. “Let’s go then!”

*

The ride home feels great. Jensen takes Jared’s hand and doesn’t let go during the whole time as they share looks and smiles. Jensen stops at a red light a couple of times and takes the opportunity to steal some kisses. He still can’t believe Jared said yes to him, that they get to be together for real. Just looking at Jared makes Jensen’s heart flutter, he’s that far gone. He never thought he could love someone like this, that this feeling existed in real life. And yet here’s beautiful Jared to prove him wrong.

Donna is very excited to see Jensen, and thanks Jared for whatever he did to bring him back. Alan looks at both of them suspiciously, but Jensen ignores it. He’s too happy to deal with his father’s disapproval now. They all have dinner together and Jared and him can’t fully disguise their looks at each other. When Jensen’s gaze travels to Chad, he can see a knowing smirk on his face. Jensen wonders if Chad already knows they are together.

After dinner everyone hangs out for a bit in the living room together, Jensen itching to touch Jared, praying for his parents to just go upstairs. Finally, after what seems like an eternity, Donna and Alan say good night. Chad waits for a couple more minutes after both of them head upstairs and also says good night, giving Jared and Jensen another knowing look. Jensen doesn’t waste any more time to jump on the couch next to Jared, wrapping his arms around him. First of all they share a languid kiss, Jensen framing Jared’s face with a hand while keeping the other arm around him. He doesn’t think he will ever get used to the amazing taste of Jared.

Once they break apart, Jensen makes a motion with his head to the direction Chad disappeared to. “Does he already know about us?”

Jared shugs. “A conversation I had with him earlier today was actually what convinced me to go after you. Chad made some really interesting points.”

Jensen raises his eyebrows. “Oh really? Please remind me to send him a fruit basket then!”

Jared chuckles but then turns serious. “At least someone wants to see us together.”

Jensen places a finger under Jared’s chin, lifting his head back up. “Jay, it’s gonna be okay. I promise.”

Jared purses his lips. “What about Jeff, Jen? He threatened me. I feel scared for myself but most of all for my baby, I’m afraid he may try something.”

Jensen can see real fear in Jared’s eyes, and he suddenly feels pissed again at Jeff. “I’m gonna go talk to him again, Jay. And this time it will be definitive. What he did to you was unforgivable. He won’t come near you or your daughter if he knows what’s good for him.”

The upset look doesn’t leave Jared’s face, and Jensen frowns. “What’s up, Jay?”

Jared shrugs again. “It’s nothing, just stupid.”

Jensen frames his face again. “It’s not stupid. Please tell me.”

Jared bites his bottom lip. “I’m just… well… I don’t know, I’m just jealous of him I guess. Insecure. You’ve been together for years, you have a strong connection. Don’t be mad okay, but I don’t want to be like Danneel. I’m afraid you’re still gonna be with him eventually while we are together.”

Jensen grimaces, he wishes Jared had more faith in him but he gets it. He cheated on Danneel for years, after all. It’s understandable that Jared feels insecure. So he presses his forehead against Jared’s and caresses his face with his thumb.

“Jay, I know I’ve made mistakes. And yeah, Jeff and I have a long history. But I always saw him as a friend with benefits, nothing more than that. He may have stronger feelings for me, but I don’t. I never loved Jeff, I can assure you that. And as you know, I never loved Danni either. Even being engaged to her, I still felt the need to be with Jeff. I was only marrying her out of convenience, so I could have a wife to show off. But you, Jay…” Before continuing, Jensen plants a chaste but long kiss to Jared’s mouth, then speaks looking right into his eyes. “I love you in a way I’ve never loved anyone. What I feel for you is something completely new to me, and it’s so deep. I don’t feel the need to be with Jeff at all, in fact the last times we were together it felt like something was not right anymore. It’s because I already loved you and wanted only you. I don’t want him anymore Jay, and he will have to accept it. I promise I won’t cheat on you, Jay.”

Jared’s eyes suddenly fill with tears and he purses his lips. “Can you just promise me just one thing, Jen?”

“Anything you want, my love.”

“Just… please, promise you will never lie to me. J--Justin, he… he did. He lied to me. And it destroyed me, Jen. Whatever happens, please promise you’ll always be honest. Even if you someday realize you don’t want to be with me anymore, just tell me the truth. That’s all I ask.”

Jensen’s heart tightens, wondering what Justin did to Jared and hating the man he doesn’t even know. But he swallows the anger down and smiles at Jared. “I promise you, Jay. I know I’m not perfect but I can promise you I’ll never willingly hurt you. I know I’ll never ever get tired of you because I love you to the moon and back already, but I promise you here and now that I’ll always be honest with you.”

Jared smiles. “Thank you. I promise you the same.”

Jensen stays with Jared on the couch for a little longer, just kissing and talking, and it feels perfect. Jensen places a hand on Jared’s belly, and Jared smiles at him. Jensen is so happy, he feels ready to face the world with Jared. This right here feels like a dream come true.

Later Jensen goes upstairs with Jared, walking with him to his bedroom. Jensen wishes he could take Jared to his own bedroom but he’s gonna be patient because this is something he knows is definitely worth waiting for. He kisses Jared good night, and caresses his belly.

“Night Jay. Night, baby girl.”

Jensen sleeps better than he has in a long time.

*

Jensen doesn’t want to, but he goes to the agency to talk to Jeff the next morning. He makes it short since he wants to spend as little time as possible with the man. Jeff gets up from his chair as Jensen walks into their office.

“I just came here to tell you one thing, Jeff. I have a lot of consideration for you and everything we’ve been through together, but what you did to Jared is unforgivable. You don’t have the right to harass or threaten him, to say all the horrible things you said to him.”

Jeff raises his eyebrows. “Oh, so perfect Jared already told you about our conversation?”

“Yes he did. He was fully panicking by the time I got there. What the fuck is wrong with you, Jeff? Now you go around threatening people? Pregnant people?”

“Jared just wants to take advantage of you Jensen! You said it yourself!”

“I was wrong, Jeff! People make mistakes and I can see Jared isn’t like that! I love him, Jeff. I love him like I never loved anyone, and I’ll do everything I can to be with him, to make him happy.”

Jeff takes a step forward, his expression softening. “But Jensen, we can still be together even if you’re with Jared!”

Jensen scoffs. “No! I won’t cheat on Jared, Jeff. What I did to Danneel was wrong, I hurt her deeply, I was an asshole. But I only did it because I didn’t love her and you manipulated me. But that’s over now. I’m becoming my own person and I’m gonna change my life. I love Jared so much and I’ll protect him. I wish we could have remained friends but you ruined everything, Jeff. I can’t forget what you did to Jared. So I came here to tell you that. I’m still gonna come to the agency occasionally, but I’ll be sure you’re not here when I come in. It’s sad that it has come to this between us, but it is what it is. That’s all I had to say. Take care, Jeff.”

Jensen goes to the door and Jeff follows him. “Jensen listen to me!”

Jensen looks at him one more time. “No. I don’t want to. And you can’t make me anymore. Goodbye.”

Jensen walks out of the agency feeling fifty pounds lighter. He feels proud, he’s finally standing up for himself and it feels amazing. Jared is making him a better man, and he loves this person he is becoming. He will be the best man he can be for Jared and his baby girl.

A baby that hopefully will be_ theirs_.

**TO BE CONTINUED...**


	14. Chapter 14

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is a chapter I'm very fond of and couldn't wait to share with you guys! It has a scene I love very very much, one of my absolute favorites, and also in this chapter we learn a very important information!
> 
> As usual if you can, spare some time to give me your thoughts in this since I'm dying to know what you guys think!
> 
> Also, for the first time in this story we have a song for this chapter (if you read my other stories you know the drill!), and this is actually the theme song for this story, I chose it a long time ago and I finally get to share it. I actually chose a specific version of this song, and I have a favor to ask you guys!
> 
> Please open the link only when you reach the right scene with the boys, you will know it's the one. And as you read it, I'd like for you guys to imagine it like it happens in the video. I've done it a million times in my head and I promise it's worth it. You will know what I mean!
> 
> [Here's the song for this chapter.](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=G0WTFfZqjz0)

_ **Jared** _

Jared is sitting with Jensen by the pool and he can feel that Jensen is a little off.

“What’s up, Jen? Is it about Jeff?”

Jensen shrugs. “Yeah, I mean… I know you probably don’t want to hear this, but Jeff and I went through so much together, you know? It’s hard to see everything ending like this, what we have become. Jeff helped me a lot in the past, he helped me grow up, though sadly I lost a lot of myself in the process. I guess it takes some getting used to, sorry.”

Jared smiles and takes Jensen’s hand. “It’s okay Jen. You had a life before me and I also had a life before you,” Jared rubs a hand on his belly for emphasis. “Clearly. It’s not the easiest thing in the world to move past some stuff, and I get it. We are not in a hurry.”

Jensen smiles back and closes the distance between them. “You’re the best.” He frames Jared’s face and gives him a sweet kiss, feeling Jared melting into it. They get lost in each other for a few moments until they hear a throat clearing, causing for both of them to jump. Jared looks up and finds Alan standing next to them. He feels completely embarrassed, feeling his cheeks burning up, and looks down. Jensen speaks for them.

“Oh, hey dad.”

“Oh, so I see you two decided to be together after all.”

Jensen wraps an arm around Jared’s shoulders, who is able to relax an inch, and looks up. Jensen raises an eyebrow at Alan.

“Yeah, dad. I love Jared and he loves me. There’s no reason why we shouldn’t be together.”

“Oh, is that so? May I remind you that your mother still thinks Jared is carrying Brock’s baby.”

Jared takes a deep breath. “Mr. Ackles, I think it’s time Donna learns the truth. We’ve kept this secret for too long already.”

Alan shakes his head. “No, not yet. Donna is gonna start hopefully what will be her last round of chemo soon, she’s still too fragile. I don’t think it’s a good idea to tell her just yet.” Alan studies both of them for a while before letting out a sigh. “Look, despite what you may think, I’m not against you two being together. I can see you two care about each other, I can see you are good for my son Jared, I’m sorry if I had a wrong impression before. But I don’t think you should tell Donna about you two yet. All I’m asking is for you to be discreet until we get to tell her. Can you do that?”

Jensen looks at Jared, who nods. Jensen turns to Alan. “Yeah, dad. We can do that.”

Alan thanks them and leaves them alone. Jensen gives Jared a small smile. “Thank you, Jay. I know it’s not ideal to hide what we have for now, but it’s just until my mom is doing better. I still can’t wait to scream from the rooftops how much I love you.”

Jared chuckles. “It’s okay. I also have Donna’s best interests at heart. Like I was saying, we have time, we can be patient.”

Jensen kisses Jared’s cheek. “It doesn’t mean I’m not gonna attack you on every opportunity I have.”

*

Later that day, when Jared is already in his room getting ready for the night, Jensen peaks in. “Can I come in?”

Jared nods. “Sure thing!”

Jensen walks inside carrying a bucket of popcorn and two cans of Coke. “Feel like watching a movie?”

Jared smiles and pats the bed. “Definitely. And we won’t even mind sharing the popcorn with you.”

Jensen laughs and settles on the bed next to Jared, taking his shoes off as Jared searches for something to watch on TV. They finally settle on a movie that’s just starting, and Jensen places an arm around Jared, who leans on his chest, popcorn bucket between them. Jensen caresses Jared’s hair, it feels homey and perfect. He can’t wait to have this everyday.

Once the movie is over, Jensen sets the bucket aside and wraps his other arm around Jared, pulling him even closer and kissing him fully on the lips, suddenly feeling hungry for him. Jared frames his face with both hands and they make out for a long time, Jensen feeling his body reacting to Jared.

“God Jay, you make me crazy, holy shit.” Jensen murmurs as he plants kisses all over Jared’s face.

Jared eventually pulls away, holding Jensen’s face in place and giving him a shy look. “Jen…”

Jensen can feel something is coming so he tries to sober up. “What’s wrong, Jay?”

Jared looks down between them. “Can I ask you something?”

Jensen places a kiss on Jared’s forehead. “Anything you want, love.”

Jared purses his lips. “Do you think we can… I mean, don’t get me wrong, I want you very much but do you think... we can wait?” Jared places a hand on his belly to show what he means. “I mean, wait until she comes? I know it’s a lot to ask from you, but I just don’t feel comfortable doing…”

“Jay,” Jensen interrupts him, placing a strand of hair behind Jared’s ear and smiling kindly at him. “Of course we can wait. We aren’t in a hurry, remember? Yes, I want to make love to you so much, but it’s not just that. I just want to be with you, that’s what I need the most. When we finally do it, it will be amazing, but for now what we have is perfect. I want to get to know you more, spend time with you, and watch this little one growing inside you. That’s more than enough for me.”

Jensen covers Jared’s hand with his on his belly, and Jared’s heart feels ten times bigger. He feels so relieved Jensen understands, he also wants to be with him one hundred percent, but right now he just doesn’t feel comfortable. Jensen just showed him once again how amazing he is, how much he respects Jared and also cares for his baby girl. Jared smiles widely at him.

“Thank you for understanding.”

Jensen kisses him again, slow and languid. “You’re worth the waiting, my love.”

*

Jared is pretty much on cloud nine for the next few days. He can finally relax a bit, a lot of the tension always surrounding him is gone. Of course they are still lying to Donna and Jared is aware things will blow up eventually, but for now he allows himself to relax, enjoy his pregnancy, enjoy Jensen. Jensen is way more amazing than Jared could ever imagine. He’s caring, attentive, he is always showering Jared with affection and showing how much he loves him. And after ending things with Jeff, Jared can see Jensen is different, he is also more relaxed, it’s like he is more true to himself. And Jared loves to learn this side of him. Of course they still have to hide their relationship because of Donna, but Jared can deal with it for now. They are together whenever they can, Jensen always visiting Jared in his room before bedtime so they can spend time together, and more often than not they talk for hours. Jared has learned that he loves to just talk to Jensen. He is very smart, has a lot of stories to tell and Jared learns so much from him. Jared is not as smart as him of course, he didn’t study nearly as much, but Jensen is equally interested in everything Jared has to say. Jared is learning more and more that Jensen is just perfect, the one person he always dreamed of finding.

Jared is in the kitchen with Donna when she brings up the subject of a nursery.

“Jared, honey, my granddaughter is coming in a few months and we haven’t even started getting her nursery ready yet! Before we know it she will be here and won’t have a crib! We need to decide on a theme for the nursery, I have a friend who is an interior designer, she has agreed to come help us get everything done!”

Jared chuckles, feeling suddenly shy. “Donna you don’t need to do all of this. Just a simple thing is fine, a crib and dresser are more than enough, really.”

Donna tsks and shakes her head. “No way! This is my granddaughter we are talking about, I want her to be very spoiled and have a room made for the princess she is.” She then takes Jared’s hand and gives him a sad smile. “Please Jared, let me do this for her. She’s a part of Brock and I really need to do this.”

Jared swallows hard, feeling again like the biggest jerk on the planet for lying to Donna like this. So he nods. “Sure, Donna. You can decorate the nursery any way you want.”

Donna smiles wider and claps her hands together. “Awesome! Now all you need to do is to choose the theme and I’ll call Beth so she can start the job.”

Jared goes to his room and spends some time thinking about the theme he would like for his daughter’s nursery. He never gave this any thought because he never assumed she would have a nursery all to herself, and after coming to the Ackles’ house so much has happened that he didn’t have the opportunity to really think about it. But now that he has the chance to do this, he would like for his baby girl to have the best room. The easiest way is to do everything pink and very girly, but Jared doesn’t think he wants that. He takes a walk around his room trying to come up with something, and when he enters his closet, he finds the shopping bag with the onesie Jensen gave him. It has a print of a baby moose and a baby squirrel on it. Jared stares at it and his heart does a small jump. He smiles at himself because it’s _perfect_.

Jared goes downstairs to talk to Donna, and finds her talking to Jensen in the living room. Jensen smiles at him and Jared returns it before addressing Donna.

“I have a theme for the nursery’s decoration.”

Jensen’s eyes widen at that. “Oh, really? So that’s going on now?”

Donna answers him. “Yes, it’s about time we start to prepare for my granddaughter’s arrival. Beth is gonna help us with everything, and I asked Jared to decide on a theme.” She turns to Jared. “What is it, honey?”

Jared smiles excitedly at her, showing the onesie. “Well, Jensen gave her this for Christmas… and I was looking at it and it hit me. I think I’d like baby animals for a theme. Especially baby moose and squirrel.” Jared looks shyly at Jensen and shrugs. “I think it would be cute.”

Jensen studies him for a couple of seconds and opens a blinding smile. “I think it’s perfect.”

Donna agrees. “Yes it is! I’ll let Beth know moose and squirrel it is!”

Later that night when Jared is alone with Jensen, Jensen talks nonstop about the decoration Jared chose, and how awesome is gonna be. Jared feels warmer inside, seeing Jensen excited about anything baby related makes him insanely happy.

*

A few days later, the renovations in the nursery are proceeding at full speed. Jared has agreed on the crib and all the furniture, and Beth has managed to find the cutest moose and squirrel wallpaper. Jared nearly melted when he saw it. He’s feeling excited, everything becoming more and more real. A few days ago Jared has decided on the baby’s name, but he hasn’t shared it with anyone yet. He has decided to wait a bit longer so he can get used to it himself.

Jared, Jensen and Donna are having breakfast, Alan and Chad having left for work already, when Jensen makes an announcement.

“Mom, I’ve decided to turn that room next to dad’s office that we don’t use into a photo lab for myself.” Donna raises her eyebrows in surprise and Jared stays quiet, since he already knew that. It’s something they discussed together and Jared thought it was a fantastic idea. “I’ve been doing some work as you know, documenting the backstage of the fashion world, and I want to have a space where I can work, develop my pictures. I want to seriously dedicate myself to it. I was hoping I could ask Beth to give me a hand as well when she’s done with the nursery.”

Donna smiles at Jensen and places a hand on his forearm. “That’s great, baby. I think it’s a fantastic idea, I like that you’re doing what you love and you should have your own space to work. I’ll let Beth know she needs to stretch her favor to us.”

Jensen smiles. “Thanks mom.”

“By the way, Jared honey you seriously need to go shopping for the layette. This girl needs stuff! She only has a handful of things and mostly the few onesies and dresses I got her lately. That is a shame. I wish I could take you shopping but I just don’t have the energy that would take.” Donna turns to Jensen. “Son, would you mind taking Jared to do some shopping for the baby? You’re free today right?”

Jensen lifts an eyebrow in surprise. Jared can see he’s not hating the suggestion, just wasn’t expecting it. “Me? Really? Do you think I’m qualified for the job?”

Donna chuckles. “Son, it’s not rocket science. I’m sure you’re gonna be fine, and there are people working at the stores to help you. I just want you to bond with your niece, that’s all. What do you say?”

Jensen looks from Donna to Jared, silently asking what he thinks. Jared smiles back and nods, so Jensen agrees. “Okay then, let the shopping begin!”

*

Jared didn’t expect for Jensen to be so ridiculously excited about the layette shopping. Once Donna suggested it he went into full mode, googling a list of things they would need and ticking all of them. Jared actually spends an amazing afternoon with Jensen, shopping for everything his baby needs, just the two of them as a family. Jensen really acts as if he’s the father of the baby, and when the girl assisting them refers to him as the father, instead of correcting her Jensen lights up with pride. Jared can really see Jensen is into this, he’s not doing just because Donna suggested. He’s involved in every detail of the layette and Jared is even more sure of the decision he made.

Jensen doesn’t hold back, he wants to buy everything he sees and thinks the baby will need, and goes crazy with all the girl’s clothes, especially the dresses. When he adds fifteen dresses to their cart, Jared places a hand on his arm.

“Jen, you don’t need to spend so much money on this, it’s too much! I’m sure she’s gonna be fine with less stuff. Plus, she’s gonna grow out of most of these before she even gets to wear them!”

Jensen shakes his head. “Nah, sorry dude. We have money, better as well spend it on something that really matters. I want this baby to have everything she needs.” Jensen looks pointedly at Jared. “Jay, I know this is weird for you since you didn’t have much. But we can afford this, and the little one deserves it. You do too. So please, take anything you want. I mean it.”

Jared feels emotional at that, and finally goes to see the baby clothes. He starts picking everything pink until Jensen tells him to choose some different colors, just because it’s a girl it doesn’t mean she needs to wear all pink.

They spend a couple of hours scanning everything so Jensen can pay, and they have to ask for some bigger items to be delivered like the tub, stroller and car seat since they won’t fit in the car among the other stuff. When things are stowed in the trunk and Jared takes a look at everything, he starts crying in the middle of the parking lot. Jensen is by his side in an instant.

“Jay, what’s wrong?” He asks placing a hand around Jared’s waist.

Jared shakes his head and gives Jensen a teary smile. “Nothing, it’s just… seeing all of this for her, you know. When I learned I was pregnant I didn’t have… I didn’t have anything but I still wanted her, and I knew it would be hard to get her everything she would need but I’d try and do my best. I would probably get a second-hand crib and put it next to me, she wouldn’t have much but now there’s all of this and she has a whole nursery being prepared to her and I just… it’s everything I ever wished to be able to give my baby and I can’t believe she gets to have all of this.”

Jensen pulls Jared to a hug, caressing the back of his head and whispering in his ear. “She deserves it, Jay. You both do. She’s going to be a very spoiled little one, I hope you’re aware of that. And most of all, this little girl will be very loved by all of us. She will always have everything she needs, I promise. The same goes for you.”

Jared doesn’t care that they're in the parking lot, he pulls Jensen for a long kiss. Yes, he made the right decision. Now he just needs to let Jensen know it.

_ **Jensen** _

Jensen wakes up in the morning and just stays in bed for a while thinking about everything. It has been a few days since he went shopping with Jared to get the baby stuff, and it was awesome. Jensen had been kind of wary when Donna suggested he go with Jared, he had no experience in that department, but it took almost no time for Jensen to start getting really on board with the idea. He had felt very connected with Jared and the baby, pretty much like a dad going shopping for his child. Jensen truly feels like Jared’s child is also his, but he’s unsure about confirming it with Jared since Jared himself never said anything, it was only Jensen who told him he was willing to take care of his daughter. Jensen is afraid of asking and not liking the answer. But he will, eventually. He really wants to be the father of Jared’s baby.

Suddenly Jensen has an urge that he hasn’t felt in a long time. He gets up from the bed and digs around his closet until he finds his old guitar. It’s dusty, it has been years since Jensen played, always too busy with business and other things. But now he wants to, maybe he can play a song to Jared. He sits on the bed and spends some time cleaning and tuning the guitar. He tests a few chords trying to remember one of his favorite songs, and he plays it until Loretta calls him for breakfast.

The first thing he notices is that Jared doesn’t look great. Donna is sitting next to him so Jensen has to refrain himself to run to his side and act kind of cool.

“Jay--Jared, are you okay?”

Jared gives him a weak smile. “Yeah, I’m just feeling a bit under the weather today but nothing to worry about. Just more tired than usual, gonna get some rest and I’m sure I’ll be fine in no time. Don’t worry about it.”

Jensen waits until Donna has excused herself to go on full worry mode. “Jay, are you sure you’re okay? I have to go out for a while today, have a meeting at a magazine but I can reschedule it, it’s no problem.”

Jared waves him off. “No way. Seriously Jen, I’m just more tired than usual because of the pregnancy, that’s all. I’ll be fine, go do your thing and I’ll see you later.”

Jensen still isn’t happy about it but he kisses Jared goodbye and leaves. He has a meeting at a magazine so he can do a photoshoot that seems very nice, and Jensen really doesn’t want to waste this opportunity.

The meeting goes very well and Jensen is happy about it, he can’t wait to tell Jared. Just as he’s leaving the building his phone rings, and when Jensen checks the caller, he notices it’s Jeff. Jensen scoffs and sends it to voicemail, but it starts again almost immediately.

“What?” Jensen answers, not even bothering to be polite.

_“Hello, Jensen. I was wondering if we can have a word?”_

Jensen sighs. “Go ahead.”

_“Actually, can you come to the agency?”_

“I’m kinda in a hurry right now, Jeff.”

_“It won’t take long Jensen, I promise. It’s important.”_

Jensen pinches the bridge of his nose. “This better be quick.”

*

“I’m here. What do you want?”

Jeff lifts his eyebrows. “Whoa, you never treated me like this. You really changed Jensen, Jared for sure did a number on you.”

Jensen huffs. “Jared didn’t do anything. Actually he did, he opened my eyes to a lot of things, and I didn’t change. I’m finally myself now and it feels awesome. But I’m not here to discuss myself, I want to know what is so important that you have to talk to me personally?”

Jeff purses his lips. “Well, I’ve decided I’m taking some time off. Gonna go on a trip, stay away for a while.”

Jensen is taken aback, and lifts an eyebrow. “Oh really?”

“Yes. I think it’s gonna be the best for all of us. The guys can manage the agency for a while, it’s gonna be in good hands. And when I come back we can decide what to do with it.”

Jensen thinks he would be more affected by the news that Jeff is going away, but he’s actually relieved. It’s gonna be good for Jared and him that Jeff is not around, specially for Jared to have a peaceful pregnancy. So he nods.

“Okay, I think it’s gonna do you good. I wish you all the best, Jeff. And I hope you find what you’re looking for.”

Jeff gives him an indescribable look. “Looks like you already did.”

Jensen thinks about Jared and smiles. “You bet I did.”

*

Jensen arrives back home feeling lighter. It’s sad knowing what Jeff’s and his relationship has come to, but if Jeff hadn’t tried to manipulate Jensen so much, they still would be able to remain friends. Sadly, Jensen can’t see that happening any time soon.

He pushes all thoughts of Jeff aside when he enters the house, focusing completely on seeing Jared. He finds Donna ready to go out.

“Hey mom, where are you going? How’s Jared?”

Donna smiles at him. “New round of chemo starts today, remember? Hopefully the last one. Your dad is meeting me there. And Jared is okay, he’s in his room sleeping. Bye, son.”

Donna gives him a kiss on the cheek and leaves. Jensen wastes no time climbing the stairs to Jared’s room, so he can check on him. He enters the room quietly and finds Jared on the bed, lying on his side with one hand under the pillow and another on his belly. Jensen smiles at the scene, he loves watching Jared sleeping. And he looks even more beautiful with a more prominent belly like this. Jensen loves watching Jared’s baby growing inside of him.

Jensen suddenly has an idea and goes to his room to get his guitar. Returning to Jared’s side, he pulls up a chair and sits next to him, playing a soft melody to help Jared sleep better. Jensen plays for a while as he just watches Jared, until finally his eyes slowly open. It takes a few moments for Jared to get oriented, and when he notices Jensen, he gives him a smile.

“Now, that’s a nice way to wake up.”

“Just thought I’d sing a lullaby.”

Jared sits up and crosses his legs, facing Jensen. “I didn’t know you played.”

Jensen shrugs. “Guess it never came up. I haven’t played in a long time. Just felt like it.”

“Do you sing too? Would you sing something for me?”

Jared looks hopeful, and Jensen suddenly feels shy. “Well, I am not a pro or anything. Haven’t done it in a long time.”

Jared gives him a puppy dog look. “Come on Jen, please?”

And Jensen knows he’s fucked. “Okay. There’s a song that I love, been practicing it this morning. Don’t mock me, okay?”

Jared holds up a hand. “I promise. Now, sit here.” Jared pats the bed next to him and Jensen obeys, sitting on it. Jared turns to face Jensen, looking expectantly. Jensen clears his throat and takes a few breaths to calm his nerves. He starts playing the first chords and looks right into Jared’s eyes as he sings.

_Wise men say_   
_Only fools rush in_   
_But I can't help falling in love with you_

_Shall I stay?_   
_Would it be a sin_   
_If I can't help falling in love with you?_

Jensen notices that Jared’s eyes are shining, and he has a beautiful smile on his face. As a tear falls down Jared’s face, Jensen has to fight his own emotions so he can carry on with the song.

_Like a river flows_   
_Surely to the sea_   
_Darling, so it goes_   
_Some things are meant to be_

_Take my hand,_   
_Take my whole life, too_   
_For I can't help falling in love with you_

Suddenly Jared inhales sharply, his eyes widening, and he brings a hand to his belly. Jensen immediately stops playing.

“Jay, what’s wrong?”

Jared gasps and opens a huge smile to Jensen. “The baby, she… she just kicked. For the first time.”

This time it’s Jensen’s eyes that grow as wide as saucers. “Really?”

Jared nods. “Yeah, I just felt it! Gimme your hand.”

Jared takes Jensen’s hand and places it on a spot on his belly. “It was right here.”

They wait for a little while, Jared asking the baby to move again but nothing happens, Then he looks at Jensen with an arched eyebrow. “Maybe she likes your voice singing.”

Jensen looks at Jared, sounding almost hopeful. “You think so?”

Jared just smiles at him and nods. Jensen then sets the guitar aside and leans down so he can be closer to Jared’s belly and places both hands on it, caressing it with his thumbs as he resumes singing a capella.

_Take my hand,_   
_Take my whole life, too_   
_For I can't help falling in love with you._

There’s no mistaking, Jensen can clearly feel a movement under his palm, and he looks at Jared, feeling his own eyes tearing up. “She kicked! Oh my God Jay, that’s so amazing! I guess this girl likes music, huh?”

Jared stares deeply at Jensen for a few moments before speaking, both his hands covering Jensen’s on his belly.

“Or maybe she likes her daddy’s voice.”

It takes a little while for Jensen’s brain to catch up and realize what Jared has said. When he replays it in his mind, his eyes grow even wider than before and he swallows hard, staring at Jared who is smiling at him expectantly.

“What did you say?” Jensen’s voice is a mere whisper, as if he’s afraid to ask it out loud, maybe he heard it wrong.

Jared frames Jensen’s face with one hand. “Jen, do you really want to be the father of my baby?”

Jensen thinks his heart is gonna explode out of his chest, it’s so huge right now. Tears stream down his face as he realizes what Jared is asking, it’s everything he wants. Frantically nodding, he smiles at Jared among his tears. “Are you sure?”

Jared nods. “Yes, if you want to. You’ve been with me almost from the beginning, you’re the only father besides me that my baby has ever known. And I know how much you already love Brooke.”

Jared waits, and it takes another moment for Jensen’s brain to catch up. When he does, his jaw drops. “_Brooke_? Is this her name?”

Jared smiles and nods again. “Yes, I decided on it a few days ago. I wanted to honor Brock somehow, and I think Brooke is a good way to do it. What do you think?”

Jared looks at Jensen expectantly, and he gives Jared a blinding smile. “It’s perfect, Jay. And the answer is yes. A million times yes, I want to be her father. There’s nothing I want more in this world than this. And also, to belong to you completely.”

Jensen lifts Jared’s shirt to expose his baby bump. It’s getting more round now and it’s even more beautiful. He frames it with both hands, leaning down to plant a long and sweet kiss to it while Jared caresses his hair. Jensen speaks only an inch away from his belly.

“Hey Brooke. It’s me, Daddy. I mean, your other Daddy. Well, I guess Jared is your Daddy already, so I think I can be your Papa, huh? What do you say?” Jensen looks up at Jared to check with him, and Jared only nods with tears on his face. So Jensen goes back to his chat. “Yeah, it’s Papa here, Papa Jensen. I want you to know I already love you very much, okay? Oh and I love your Daddy very much as well. We are gonna be a family and will make a great team together. I promise I’ll take care of you and Daddy, alright? I love you, baby.”

Jensen plants another kiss to Jared’s belly and feels fluttering under his hands. Jared speaks with a hoarse voice. “She loves you very much too.”

Jensen shifts back up and frames Jared’s face. “Thank you, Jay. Thank you so much. I wanted this so much but I was afraid to ask you, that’s a huge deal and I didn’t want you to feel pressured. This means more than the world to me. I promise I’ll try my very best to be the greatest father in the world to Brooke. Only second to you, of course.”

Jared smiles. “I know you will. Also, Brooke still needs a middle name. And since you’re her other father, I want you to choose it.”

Jensen feels emotional once again, knowing Jared is trusting something so important to him. “Really?”

Jared nods. “Yeah. I want you to be a part of it.”

Jensen bites his lip, he doesn’t need to think much. “Well, I always liked the name Anne. I think it would work well for a middle name, what do you think? Brooke Anne Padalecki?”

Jared scrunches up his nose. “Hmm, I don’t know. I don’t think I like the sound of that.” Jensen’s face falls, but Jared continues, opening up a smile. “I prefer Brooke Anne Ackles-Padalecki better.”

Jensen’s smile is so huge it hurts his face. “You serious?”

Jared snorts. “Of course! You think I went through all this trouble to get into this family so my baby wouldn’t be an official Ackles? No way, she will need the status. It’s too good of an opportunity to pass up!”

Jensen laughs and Jared follows, and it feels so good. They’re laughing and tears are falling from both their faces and it feels perfect. Jensen pulls Jared to him and wraps him up in a tight hug, burying his face on Jared’s neck. “Thank you, Jay. Thank you so much. You gave me the greatest gift in the world.” Jensen pulls away so he can look at Jared, and touches their foreheads. “I may not have conceived her with you, but in my heart she is my daughter, one hundred percent.”

Jared gently wipes a single tear from Jensen’s face with his thumb. “Yes she is, Jen. She is our daughter.”

Feeling chills all over Jensen kisses Jared tenderly, for a long time, without any rush. Then he pulls back and picks up his discarded guitar, starting to play the song again. “Lemme go again because a little someone interrupted me. I see you already like to steal Papa’s thunder, huh Brooke? Alright, then. Since you apparently like this song so much it’s gonna be your lullaby, okay? Now be quiet and let Papa finish it.”

Jensen starts singing again, pouring even more emotion into the lyrics because now he’s not only singing for the love of his life, he’s singing for his daughter too.

_His daughter. _His and Jared’s_._

A baby that Jensen once upon a time wanted nothing to do with, is now a part of him. Maybe not literally but it doesn’t matter. She certainly is a big part of his heart.

Jensen knows for sure this is one of the most amazing moments in his life, alongside a handful of others he spent with Jared himself.

As Jensen sings, he sends a silent_ thank you_ to the universe for giving him everything he never knew he was looking for. For giving Jensen his home and for showing him finally what true love really means.

_ **Jared** _

“Okay, two more steps forward.”

Jared carefully takes two small steps as instructed, he can’t see anything since Jensen is behind him covering his eyes with his hands. Today he finally gets to see the nursery ready, Donna didn’t let Jared see the renovation process because she wanted for it to be a surprise. Jared has been dying with curiosity, trying to get Donna to cave and show him the progress but it was futile. The woman had the key to the nursery and would keep it locked at all times. And now the day has arrived and Jared feels like a kid, he just can’t wait to see the final thing.

Jared hears Donna’s voice coming from somewhere to his left. “Okay, show him Jensen!”

Jensen drops his hands from Jared’s face, and he blinks a few times to adjust to the light again. When he finally takes a look around the room, his heart beats faster, his throat feels tighter and his eyes moisten. It’s perfect, it’s everything Jared wished he could offer his daughter but couldn’t. There are moose and squirrels everywhere, on the wallpapers, cushions, in details spread around the room. All the colors are amazing, the stuffed animals Jensen and him got are part of the decoration as well, everything is perfect. On a shelf it’s the teddy bear that belonged to Brock alongside a beautiful framed picture of Jared that of course, Jensen took. Jared walks around the room looking at every detail, touching, he doesn’t miss anything.

“So… what do you think?”

Jared startles and turns around, suddenly remembering there are other people with him in the room. He realizes that not only Donna and Jensen are there but also Chad and Alan. He smiles at them, not being able to hold back a tear.

“It’s perfect. More than perfect, actually. It’s much more than I could ever ask for my baby.” Jared brings a hand to his baby bump and looks at all of them significantly. “Brooke loves it.”

It takes a few seconds for them to get it, and when they do, Jared sees three pairs of eyes widening. Jensen is the only ones who remains unimpressed and Jared is glad Donna doesn’t notice it. She brings both hands to her face.

“Brooke? Is that the name of my granddaughter?”

Jared nods. “Yes. In honor of Brock, I wanted for her name to have something of his. So her name will be Brooke Anne.”

Jared glances at Chad, who has eyes suspiciously red. Jared gives him a smile, which his friend returns. “It’s perfect, Jare.”

Donna nods. “Yes it is. Couldn’t be more perfect, actually. She’s gonna have a piece of her father with her! Thank you, Jared!”

Donna rushes to give him a hug, and Jared gives Jensen a significant look over her shoulder before thanking her profusely for the nursery.

*

In the evening, after Donna and Alan have gone to their bedroom, Jared, Jensen and Chad spend some time in the living room watching TV and just vegging around. Eventually Jared scoots closer to Jensen, lying against him. Jensen wraps his arms around Jared, resting one hand securely on his belly and Jared sighs with happiness. Chad turns to them with a smug smile on his face.

“Finally you two got your heads out of your asses, huh? I’m glad. Like I told Jare, I could never see this coming but you make a perfect pair.”

Jared smiles at his friend, but it’s Jensen who speaks first. “Thank you for the help. Jay told me you talked to him and I really appreciate it. I owe you one.”

Chad raises his beer can in salute. “Anytime, dude.”

Jared remembers he still hasn’t told his friend the latest news. “I asked Jensen to be Brooke’s father.”

Chad’s eyes widen and he sits up straighter. “Really? That’s so cool!” Chad frowns. “I mean, assuming he said yes. You said yes, right Jensen?”

Jensen chuckles and Jared feels the vibration under him. “I would be crazy not to. I already love this girl like my own. To me, she is.” Jensen rubs Jared’s baby bump for emphasis and it brings a wave of warmth to Jared’s heart. Deciding to ask Jensen to be Brooke’s father was the best decision he ever made, he wasn’t sure how to ask him but the perfect moment presented itself when Jensen was singing to them and Brooke chose that moment to kick for the first time. Jared took that as a sign from heaven, and it couldn’t have been more perfect. Jared knows for sure that Jensen will be a perfect dad for Brooke, it doesn’t matter they aren’t connected by blood. Some things go far deeper than that.

Jared focuses on Chad again, and his friend suddenly has a sad look on his face. “That’s great for you guys. I’m happy for you.”

Jared frowns. “Chad are you okay? What’s happening?”

Chad looks down and shrugs. “Nothing, it’s stupid. Just…” He trails off and Jensen speaks.

“Do you want me to leave so you and Jared can talk? It’s no problem.”

Jared turns around to give Jensen a small smile, showing his appreciation. But Chad shakes his head and looks up again.

“Nah, you can stay. I could actually use some advice from both of you guys.”

Jared sits up straighter on the couch and Jensen does the same, keeping an arm around his waist, and both focus on Chad. “Anything you need, Chad. What’s up?”

Chad lets out a deep breath and looks at both of them. “It’s just that… well, don’t judge me, but I… I met a guy.”

Jared’s eyes widen and he smiles, leaning forward. “Oh my God, really? That’s great, Chad! Why would we judge you?”

Chad scrunches up his nose. “Well, because I was Brock’s boyfriend and he died just a few months ago. I feel like I’m betraying him, I wouldn’t want him to think I don’t love him anymore. I do, I always will. I feel so confused.”

Jared tries to organize his thoughts to answer his friend but Jensen speaks first, leaning closer to Chad as well. “Chad, you’re not betraying my brother. He isn’t here anymore, I know it’s hard to let go, but you can’t be stuck forever. You lived your grief, eventually you need to move on. And it doesn’t mean you stopped loving him. I didn’t know you when you were actually dating him, but I saw how devastated you were when Brock died. I can tell you loved him deeply and I’m sure he loved you just the same. And I’m sure wherever he is, he wants you to be happy and carry on with your life. Nobody will judge you for meeting someone new, we for sure won’t.”

Jensen squeezes Jared’s waist, and Jared nods, the love he feels for Jensen burning in his chest for him stepping up and saying all of this to Chad. “He’s right, Chad. It’s completely okay, I promise. But now you gotta tell us who this mysterious man is, I’m dying here!”

Chad chuckles and he instantly feels more relaxed. “Well, it’s one of the doctors from the children’s oncology ward that we go to.”

Jared’s eyes widen again. “Oooh! Oh man, say no more! It’s Doctor Calvert, isn’t it?”

Chad blushes and nods shorty. “Yeah, it’s Alex.”

Jared claps excitedly. “Yes, I knew it! I could tell you two got close! That’s great Chad, he’s so cute!”

Jensen pinches his waist hard. “Hey!”

Jared chuckles and kisses Jensen’s cheek. “You’re cuter Jen, I promise. But the dude looks like young Leo DiCaprio!” The three of them laugh and Jared turns to Chad. “And what’s going on between you two?”

“Well, he asked me out on a date last time I saw him.” Jared shouts a_ yes!_, but Chad holds up a hand. “I haven’t answered him though. Said I needed some time to think. But now after talking to you guys I feel more confident. I think I’ll say yes.”

Jared nods eagerly. “Damn right you will! I’m very happy for you Chad, you deserve to find happiness again. Maybe Brock sent him to you, after all you met him in a place Brock loved going, right?”

Chad thinks about that for a few moments and smiles genuinely. “You’re right. Maybe it was his doing.”

“Okay so waste no more time to say yes to your man. Why don’t you give him a call?”

Chad’s eyes widen. “You think so?”

Jensen answers. “One hundred percent. Go call DiCaprio.”

Chad thanks both of them and leaves to the boat house so he can call Alex. Once they’re alone, Jared turns to Jensen.

“Thank you for the help with Chad, Jen. You were awesome.”

Jensen smiles and plants a kiss to Jared’s mouth. “Well, he helped us so I wanted to help him too. Plus, he does deserve to be happy. I hope things work out between them.”

“Me too.”

Both settle down to watch TV again, and after a while Jensen speaks again. “Actually, that got me thinking. We never went out on an official date.”

Jared frowns, Jensen is right. He turns around to face him. “Yeah, actually we didn’t.”

“I mean, we skipped a few steps, we are going to have a _baby_ and we haven’t even gone out yet.” Jared smiles because Jensen is right. Jensen sits up and looks at Jared straight in the eye. “Jay, will you go out on a date with me?”

Jared’s heart skips a beat. It’s something so simple yet so meaningful. Jensen is right, they skipped a few steps but he realizes he really wants to go out on a date with Jensen, just the two of them together.

Jared smiles at him. “I’d love to. But there is one problem though.”

Jensen frowns. “What?”

Jared places a hand on his belly. “Brooke will have to come with us.”

Jensen’s face breaks into the widest smile and he leans down to plant a kiss to it. “I wouldn’t have it any other way.”

Jared frames Jensen’s face with a hand, caressing his cheek with his thumb. “It’s a date, then.”

**TO BE CONTINUED...**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Just a quick story! My first intention was to use the song _Can't Help Falling in Love_ in my fic "Wake Me Up When September Ends", in the scene where Jensen dances in the pool with Jared, it was gonna be that one until almost the very last minute, but then in the end I changed it to a song called _The Greatest Story Ever Told_ because I had run into that song and decided it was just perfect for that scene (which I still think), so I removed this song from that fic. And now I'm glad I did it because little did I know this song would actually end up being perfect for this story instead. I'm glad I saved it for later. And I hope you guys felt it too!
> 
> PS: I also hope you like the baby's name!
> 
> PS 2: thank you to amazing Kamidiox for this amazing art!


	15. Chapter 15

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hey again guys! Thank you again for all your comments! I'm so glad you like the name I chose for the baby, I was very excited about it!
> 
> This is a very very special chapter, and you will know why soon! I hope you enjoy it! and as usual, if possible please let me know your thoughts!

_**Jared** _

Jared is so excited about his date with Jensen. It’s finally Saturday and Jared is nearly dying with curiosity. Jensen is keeping it a secret, he told Jared he wants to surprise him. It’s a good thing Donna and Alan are spending the weekend away so they don’t have to explain where they are going. Jensen has told Jared to be ready at about five, since the place they’re going is a bit far away. Jared takes his time showering and a long time deciding on what to wear. Even though Jensen and him are already together he wants to look his best, as if it’s really their first date.

Jared ends up choosing light jeans and a dark blue button down. This shirt accentuates his baby bump and Jared chooses it for this exact reason. Now that his belly is taking form he wants to show it proudly, especially for Jensen, since he likes it so much. Jared puts his sneakers on and checks himself in the mirror, trying to make his hair look presentable but it’s always a futile task. He turns sideways and rubs a hand on his belly, while proudly inspecting it in the mirror.

“Ready to go out with Papa, Brooke? I wonder where he’s gonna take us. I know it’s gonna be great.”

Jared sprays on some cologne and decides he’s ready to go. It’s almost five, and the doorbell rings. He waits a bit to see if Jensen will answer, but then it rings again. Jared grabs his phone and wallet since he’s going downstairs anyway, and rushes to open the door. He finds Jensen smiling at him, and frowns.

“Jen, you do realize that you live here, right?”

Jensen rolls his eyes but there’s a smile tugging at his lips. “Jay, can you please play along? I’m here to pick you up for our date.” Jensen presents him with a small bouquet of red roses. “These are for you.”

Jared looks at the roses and smiles fondly at Jensen. “Thank you, Jen. They are lovely.” Jared takes the bouquet as Jensen offers his arm.

“Ready to go?”

Jared wraps his hand around Jensen’s arm and nods. “Sure thing.”

As Jensen starts to drive, he puts his hand on top of Jared’s, holding on tight, while Jared holds the bouquet with his other hand. He tries to get Jensen to tell him where they’re going a few times, but Jensen keeps quiet, a sly smirk on his face the entire time. Jensen drives outside of town, and eventually starts going up a hill. Jared gets more and more excited by the minute.

Eventually, after about an hour, Jensen parks the car and both of them get out. Jensen takes Jared’s hand and walks him to the edge of what seems like a cliff.

“Are you planning on killing me?” Jared asks followed by a chuckle so Jensen knows he’s joking.

Jensen shakes his head. “Nah. Just wanted to show you this place.”

Jared looks ahead and the view instantly takes his breath away. The sun has just set, the sky is a beautiful color and from up here, he can see almost the whole city. The lights are bright down there and it’s an amazing scenery.

“Whoa… this is… it’s…”

“I know. I had forgotten how beautiful it is.”

Jared turns to Jensen. “How did you find his place?”

Jensen shrugs. “Used to come here with my friends when I was younger. I used to drive up here when I wanted some piece of mind, but it has been ages since I last did that. Guess I could never find enough time. Work always had to come first, right?”

There’s a sad tone to Jensen’s voice, and Jared bumps their shoulders. “I’m glad we are here. It’s amazing Jen.”

Jensen smiles. “I’m glad you like it.”

“So, what’s the plan?”

Jensen lets go of Jared’s hand and goes back to the car, picking something from the backseat. “Well, first I’m gonna take some pictures of you for the album. The scenery here is perfect.”

Jensen spends some time taking pictures of Jared, positioning him mostly sideways to show off his baby bump. Then Jared asks for Jensen to join him in the pictures, he wants both of Brooke’s dads in them. So Jensen positions the camera on the hood of the car, setting the timer so they can take pictures together. When Jensen shows the pictures to him on the display, Jared is instantly in love.

“They’re amazing, Jen. You’re gonna have to print some for me. Especially this one,” he points to one where they’re kissing, Jensen with a hand on Jared’s belly. Jared wants to keep it forever.

Jensen finally puts the camera back in the car and goes to the trunk, picking up some items. “Okay, time for the actual date. I’m gonna need to set up a few things.”

Jensen sets an insulated cooler bag on the floor, and picks up a few other things.

“Are we having a picnic, Jen?”

Jensen scrunches up his nose. “Yeah. Is it too lame?”

Jared shakes his head, grinning happily. “Not at all.”

Jensen smiles. “Good. But that’s not all.”

Jensen picks up a white sheet and some string, goes towards a pair of trees growing close to the edge. Jared watches in silence as Jensen ties the sheet between the trees, on the top and bottom, leaving it stretched. Jared is extremely curious to know what exactly Jensen is doing. Then he picks up a projector and a laptop from the trunk and shows them to Jared.

“We are having a movie night.”

Jared’s eyes widen, and suddenly he realizes Jensen created a screen with the sheet. “Jen, that’s amazing!”

Jensen smiles proudly. “Glad you like it. Can you set the blanket and pillows on the ground for us? They’re in the trunk too.”

Jared does as asked and sets up a nice nest for them to watch the movie. He sets the cooler close but doesn’t open it, leaving it to Jensen. Jensen sets up the projector so it shows perfectly on the sheet, and works on the laptop to put on the movie. When it’s all ready to go, he sets the laptop aside and reaches for the cooler, opening and spreading the food on the blanket.

“Eat first?”

Jared nods eagerly as his stomach rumbles. “Definitely.”

“Okay, we have some sandwiches, potato salad, a pie, some fruits and a small cake.” Before Jared can ask Jensen adds, “Loretta helped.”

Jared chuckles, and Jensen takes out a bottle of sparkling wine. “It’s non-alcoholic since Brooke isn’t twenty-one yet.”

Jared laughs feeling a warmth inside at how thoughtful Jensen was with everything. He pours wine in two glasses and hands one to Jared, and they make a toast.

“To us.”

Once they finish all the food, they clean everything up and get settled on the blanket and pillows to watch the movie.

“What are we watching, Jen?”

Jensen’s cheeks turn pink. “Alright, don’t mock me okay? But I’m actually a fan of rom coms. And I wanted to watch a specific one with you.” Jensen presses play on the laptop and the movie starts. “It’s a bit old but not too much. It’s called _Serendipity_.”

Jared doesn’t remember ever seeing that one, and he ends up loving it, he’s completely engrossed in the movie. It stars Kate Beckinsale and John Cusack, and they’re adorable. Jared spends the whole movie lying on Jensen’s chest, who wraps his arms around him. When the credits roll, Jared looks up as Jensen caresses his hair.

“It was amazing, I love it.”

Jensen smiles sweetly at him. “I’m glad you like it. There’s a reason why I chose this movie.” Jared’s eyebrows rise in curiosity as Jensen goes on. “Do you know what _serendipity_ means?”

Jared frowns. “Hmm… maybe? I’m not sure.”

Jensen stares deeply into Jared’s eyes as he answers. “To sum up, it means finding something beautiful without looking for it.”

Understanding dawns on Jared, and he smiles widely. “Well, it suits us alright. I definitely wasn’t looking for you, and I found the best thing I could ever ask for.”

Jensen plants a lingering kiss on Jared’s temple. “Darling, you are my favorite serendipity.”

Jared frames Jensen’s face and brings it down for a kiss on the lips. They kiss for a long time, without any rush, and Jared could stay like this forever. Jensen created the most perfect date ever, it’s better than if he had taken him to the fanciest restaurant. When they break the kiss, Jensen searches for Jared’s hand and links their fingers together.

“I have one last question for you.” Jared lifts an eyebrow and Jensen smiles. “You asked me to be Brooke’s father, now I’m asking if you want to be my boyfriend.”

Jared frowns, confused. “Aren’t we dating already?”

“Not officially. I never asked you. I told you we are skipping some steps.”

Jared smiles, Jensen is right. So he brings their joined hands to his lips and plants a kiss on the back of Jensen’s hand. “Yes, I want to be your boyfriend, Jen. I love you.”

Jensen’s eyes get suspiciously wet, and Jared feels emotional himself. “I love you too. To that moon up there and back. And a few times more.” Jensen touches Jared’s belly. “This little one too.”

Jared covers Jensen’s hand with his own and they exchange another kiss. He still can’t believe the turn his life took, how lucky he is. Jared was sure he would raise his baby alone, that he would have to be enough for himself and Brooke but now she has the best dad Jared could ask for, and Jared himself has the best boyfriend in the world. As they watch the city lights together, in this perfect little moment, Jared finally understands what true love really means. He could stay here with Jensen forever and nothing else would be needed. Just them and the perfect little family they will make. Jared looks at Jensen and smiles as he realizes the amazing man that was hidden underneath all those layers. Jared knows for sure the hard and painful path to get here was worth it, and he feels ready to face anything that comes their way.

*

Jensen drives them home, again holding hands with Jared the whole time. Jared feels on cloud nine, his first date with Jensen couldn’t have been more perfect. Who could tell that behind that grumpy exterior there was a romantic prince? Jared spends the whole ride remembering every detail from their perfect night.

Once they arrive home, Jensen collects the cooler bag, telling Jarred to leave the rest in the car since he can grab it all later. Jared takes the bouquet Jensen gave him and together they head inside. Jensen makes a detour to the kitchen to drop off the cooler, and takes Jared’s hand so they can go upstairs together. It’s a good thing Donna and Alan are gone for the weekend so they can be together freely.

Jensen walks Jared to his room, and both stop at the door. They stare at each other for a few moments, with smiles on their faces, without saying anything, just taking everything in. Eventually Jensen breaks the silence.

“Tonight was amazing. Thank you for agreeing to go out with me.”

Jared smiles and takes Jensen’s hand. “Well, thank _you_ for doing all of this. Every detail was perfect. I had the best time ever.”

Jensen’s face lights up at that, and he gives Jared a huge smile. “It was my pleasure. Well, so I guess I’ll be a gentleman and go to my room now.”

Jensen closes the distance and they exchange a sweet kiss, with Jensen caressing Jared’s face. Once they break apart, Jensen makes a sad face. “Night, Jay.”

Jensen takes a step away, but Jared doesn’t let go of his hand. “Wait.”

Jensen turns around again and looks at him expectantly. Jared’s heart is beating a mile a minute and he doesn’t know what has gotten into him for doing this. He feels his cheeks burning as he speaks in a low voice.

“Would you like to… well, only if you want to. But maybe would you like to sleep here? I know I said I want to wait to... well, you know, but maybe you would like to just… you don’t have to.”

Jensen smiles and plants a kiss on Jared's cheek. “You look adorable when you’re nervous. And I’d love to sleep here with you. I’ll just go take a quick shower and get changed, and I’ll be right back.”

Jensen squeezes Jared’s hand and goes to his room. Jared’s heart is still beating fast, what was he thinking? Even though he’s nervous, he is also looking forward to sharing a bed with Jensen. Jared goes into his room, places the roses on his nightstand and goes through his nightly routine, taking a nice shower as well and changing into his pajamas. After brushing his teeth he sits on his bed and waits, his heartbeat fluttering with excitement.

It doesn’t take long for Jensen to open the door and peek inside. “Hey.”

Jared smiles, and when he looks at Jensen’s face he immediately calms down. He pulls the covers and pats the mattress.”Come here.”

Jensen smiles back and walks to the bed, lying beside Jared and wrapping his arms around him. “Oh yeah, that’s much better. There’s only one problem though.”

Jared frowns. “What?”

Jensen pulls the blanket over them and both get settled, lying on their sides facing each other. Jensen places a strand of hair behind Jared’s ear. “I may get used to this very quickly.”

Jensen pulls Jared closer and they make out for a long time, lazily and lovingly. When both of them are so tired they can’t keep their eyes open anymore, Jared turns to his other side so Jensen can spoon him from behind, and he places a hand around his belly. Jared turns his face around so he can give him one more kiss.

“Night, Jen. Love you.”

Jensen holds him tighter and caresses his baby bump. “Love you too. Both of you.”

Jared sleeps better than he has in a long time.

*

In the morning, Jared wakes up to an empty bed. He frowns, feeling weird. But his funk doesn’t last long because Jensen enters the room carrying a large tray full of delicious food. Jared smiles widely and sits up. “Did you bring me breakfast in bed?”

Jensen sets the tray on the bed and sits down next to Jared, kissing him good morning. “Well, I was hoping you would share it with me.”

Jared nods and digs in, realizing he’s starving. Both eat together and Jensen makes sure Jared eats enough for Brooke too, and it warms Jared’s heart. He looks at Jensen next to him and realizes he can also get used to this very quickly.

*

Things go smoothly for the next months and Jared is very grateful that he can focus on his pregnancy without any added stress. Jared realizes more and more what an amazing person Jensen is, as well as boyfriend.

Jensen spends as much time as possible with Jared, and they have the chance to get to know each other even more. It sucks that they have to hide their love since Donna doesn’t know about them, but Jared tells himself it’s not gonna be for long. Jensen keeps taking photography jobs, and working towards his goal of having his own exhibition especially now that he has his own lab at home. Jensen also takes photos of Jared regularly for his pregnancy album, as his belly grows. He sneaks into Jared’s room more often than not to spend the night with him, leaving before sunrise so Donna won’t find out. Jared has_ really_ gotten used to having Jensen in his bed and he can’t wait to be his for real. Jensen sometimes takes Jared out on dates, and Jared loves every single one of them especially when it involves good food and a movie.

Jensen makes sure to go to every single one of Jared’s doctor appointments, always making sure their baby is doing okay. He also starts going more to the hospital with Jared, Chad and Donna to visit the children with cancer and tell them stories. Chad has finally started dating Alex and things are going well with them, his friend is happy again and Jared is happy for them. Alex is a great guy.

One night, Jensen arrives home and goes to Jared’s room, showing him a shopping bag full of children’s books. Once they settle down for the night, Jensen grabs one book from the bag and Jared asks what he’s doing.

“I’m reading Brooke a bedtime story.” Jensen answers. From then on, he does that almost every night. When he doesn’t, he sings Brooke’s favorite song to her and her Daddy, _Can’t Help Falling in Love_. And Jared knows the feeling, he really can’t help falling in love with Jensen more and more with each passing day.

But Jared is constantly living in fear that something will happen to ruin their perfect little world. There are too many threats like Jeff returning, Justin appearing, Donna learning the truth. Jared knows things can go to shit at any moment, so he makes the most out of what he has now.

Donna finishes her treatment and has to wait a little over a month to be declared in remission. Jared knows they will have to tell her the truth, she will be cancer free and there are no more reasons to lie to her. He’s getting more and more restless about this, not having a single clue how she’s gonna react.

When she is indeed declared in remission, Jared is truly happy for her. Getting rid of the cancer is amazing news, and Jared is relieved. He has grown very attached to Donna over the past few months, she really did become a mother figure to him. A celebration dinner is thrown in Donna’s honor, and everyone makes a toast for her continued health. It’s like a weight has been lifted from everyone’s shoulders.

But Jared has another weight on his shoulders, a very heavy one. He talks to Alan and Jensen, and both agree it’s time to come clean with her. There’s no reason to hide anymore, and they just can’t keep lying to her forever. They just decide to give everyone a week to prepare themselves mentally for the moment.

It’s a Saturday in June when they decide to tell Donna the truth. Jared is two weeks away from his due date and he’s feeling so on edge. He’s sitting on his bed, caressing his now very big baby bump, and talking to his daughter. She usually moves around like there’s no tomorrow but she’s quiet today.

“Brooke, today we are going to have a talk with grandma and I hope it goes well. I wish things were easier, but we have to do this. It’s for the best.”

Jared hears the door opening and looks up, finding Jensen walking in. He gives his boyfriend a nervous smile.

“Hey Jen.”

Jensen sits down next to Jared and gives him a chaste kiss on the lips, then leans down to kiss his belly. “Hey Jay. Hey baby. Nervous?”

Jared nods as he rubs his belly, feeling his eyes moistening. “Yeah. What if things go bad? What if she kicks me out? What am I gonna do then, Jen?”

Jensen scoots even closer to Jared, framing his face with a hand and looking at him in the eyes. “Jay, whatever happens I’m gonna protect you, don’t ever forget that okay? I hope my mom understands our reasons, but if she doesn’t I’ll have your back and Brooke’s. We can go to my apartment or somewhere else, no matter what we are gonna be together in this, you hear me? You are not alone, love.”

Jared nods, a tear escaping his eye and Jensen wipes it. He lets Jared know Donna and Alan are in the living room so they can go and have the talk. Jensen offers Jared a hand and he takes it, slowly getting up and walking out of the room.

As they reach the hallway though, Jared feels something weird and he stands still, grabbing Jensen’s hand harder.

“Wait!”

Jensen turns around with a frown on his face. “Jay, what is it??”

Jared looks down, feeling something on his legs. He’s wearing basketball shorts, so he can see the liquid running down and wetting the floor. He looks at Jensen with a panicked expression on his face.

“Jen, I think my water just broke!”

Jensen’s eyes grow wide as saucers and he looks down at the water dripping and then back at Jared. “What? But she isn’t due for another two weeks!”

Jared chuckles, holding his belly. “Well, I don’t think Brooke got the memo. I’m pretty sure she’s coming now.”

Jensen’s panicked face intensifies. “Oh my God, oh my God, oh my God, what do we do?”

Jared tries to smile at him. “Jen, calm down.”

Jensen apparently doesn’t listen to Jared as he gets closer to him, placing an arm around his shoulder and the other hand on his belly. “We need to get you to the hospital!” Then Jensen turns his head and shouts in the direction of the stairs. “Mom! Dad! Come up here!”

Jensen turns to Jared again. “What are you feeling? Are you in pain?”

Jared shakes his head. “No, not yet. But you better back away because your mom will be here any minute now and she doesn’t know about us, remember?”

Jensen nods and does as Jared asked just when Donna and Alan arrive upstairs, and Alan speaks in a rushed tone. “Son, what’s happening?”

Jensen makes a motion to the floor. “Jared’s water broke, the baby is coming, we need to rush to the hospital right now!”

“The baby is coming? Oh that is wonderful!” Donna puts both hands together and smiles as she sees the water on the floor, then places a hand on Jensen’s shoulder. “Son, calm down. If I didn’t know any better I’d say you are the father! We still have time, the baby won’t be born right away. There’s no need for such desperation.” Donna turns to Jared. “Honey, your stuff and Brooke’s is all packed up, right?”

Jared nods, Donna herself had helped Jared pack the stuff for the hospital a few days ago claiming it was better to have everything ready just in case. It turns out she was right.

“Okay, good. Are you having contractions?” Jared shakes his head. “Alright, so let’s drive you to the hospital. Our driver is off today so one of you should do the driving.”

Jensen snaps out of his stupor and takes a step forward. “I’ll drive us. Come on Jay--Jared, I’ll take you to the car. Dad can you pick up their stuff?”

Alan gives them a strange look but nods. Jensen places a hand on Jared’s back and guides him downstairs as Donna goes to her room to get changed quickly. Jensen takes Jared to his car, and helps him get settled.

“Jen, you should put a towel on the seat, I don’t know if more stuff will come out of me.”

Jensen leans down and gets close to Jared’s face, checking the front door first, then planting a kiss to Jared’s lips. “I don’t care, Jay.” He then gives Jared a blinding smile. “Our baby is coming.”

Jared stares at Jensen for a few moments, framing his face with a hand. “She is, Jen. Our daughter will be with us soon.” They share a moment that goes beyond words and Jensen kisses Jared’s temple before pulling away just in time as the front door opens and Alan and Donna walk out. After putting everything in the trunk Jensen drives to the hospital, and Jared itches to take Jensen’s hand, knowing Jensen feels the same way. But Jared knows for sure he wants Jensen with him in the delivery room and he will make it happen one way or another.

Arriving at the hospital Jared goes through the procedures to have him admitted, and then a nurse brings a wheelchair to take him to a room. She asks everyone to wait for Jared to get settled and for the doctor to examine him before they go see him. Before going, Jared asks Jensen to call Chad, who is at work, to let him know the baby is coming.

Once in the room the nurse gives Jared a gown to change into, and helps him get settled. She takes his blood pressure and makes notes on his chart before leaving him alone. Not too long after, a petite red-haired doctor comes to see him.

“Hello, Jared. I’m Doctor Connell, but you can call me Ruth. I’ll be the one helping to bring your baby girl into the world today. Is that okay?”

Jared nods, instantly feeling a good vibe coming from the doctor. “Yeah, it’s okay. Just want to make sure Brooke arrives healthy.”

Ruth smiles. “We will make sure it is that way. Now, I’m gonna examine you to see how things are progressing, okay?”

Jared nods and allows Ruth to examine him. She seems pleased when she’s finished. “Looks like everything is in order in there and Brooke is ready to come. We are gonna get you ready for the c-section and in a couple of hours you will be taken to the delivery room, alright?” Jared nods, feeling anxious. “Your family can stay with you, you just cannot eat or drink anything, alright?”

Jared nods again and the doctor leaves the room. Soon, Jensen, Alan and Donna join Jared in the room, Jensen letting him know he has called Chad and he’s on the way. Jared wishes Jensen could stay close to him, that he could hold him, but they share secret looks, Jensen always with a reassuring smile, and Jared feels calmer. They finally have a moment to themselves when Alan takes Donna to the cafeteria to grab something to eat, and Jensen sits on the edge of the bed with an arm around Jared.

“How are you feeling, love?”

“Good. I’m having some contractions and some pain but the doctor said it’s normal. Can’t wait to meet Brooke, Jen. But I’m also nervous.”

Jared looks at Jensen who gives him a sweet kiss. “I can’t wait to meet her either. And I know you are, I am too but it’s gonna be fine, Jay. She will come very healthy and you will also be okay. And I’ll be waiting impatiently to meet my girl.”

Jared frowns, that’s not what he wants.

A bit later, when everyone is back in the room, Chad included, a nurse comes to see how Jared is doing, and before leaving she asks a question.

“Is anyone gonna go with you to the delivery room? You are allowed to have one person there with you.”

Jared knows Donna would like to be there but he looks straight at Jensen.

“Jensen could be there with me. I mean, he could take photos of the birth since he’s such a good photographer. Would that be okay?”

Jensen has a touched look on his face, as if he can’t believe Jared found a way for him to be there to see the birth of his daughter. Jared wouldn’t have any other way even if it meant telling Donna the truth about them. There’s absolutely no way Jensen won’t be in the delivery room with him when Brooke arrives. Jensen nods, speechless, and thankfully Donna doesn’t catch anything. The nurse leaves and Jensen excuses himself to go grab his camera from his car. Chad gives him a knowing look and a smirk, and Alan looks uncomfortable. But Jared doesn’t care.

Soon he’s wheeled to the delivery room and is settled on the table, attached to a number of things. Not too long later Jensen enters the room, wearing a gown, mask and cap, and holding his camera. When he sees Jared he smiles behind the mask, comes closer to his face and leans down to talk to him, caressing his hair. “Hey love. How are you feeling?”

Jared smiles lovingly at him. “Good. Thanks for being here.”

Jensen smiles back at him. “Thank you for having me here. It means the world to me.”

Jensen kisses him softly on the forehead through the mask before stepping away so the staff can begin the procedures, but remaining as close as possible. Eventually the anesthesia kicks in and Jared feels numb from the waist down, which is a weird feeling. Doctor Ruth arrives soon and greets Jared, asking how he’s doing. Once he says he’s fine, she looks at Jensen.

“And who is this lovely man?”

Jared looks behind him and gives Jensen a smile. “This is Jensen, he’s Brooke’s father.”

The doctor smiles. “Oh, so this baby will be gorgeous, no doubt! Let’s get her out, shall we?”

_ **Jensen** _

“Let’s get her out, shall we?”

Jensen’s heart is beating so fast it might burst out of his chest at any second. He still can’t believe he’s in the delivery room, that he gets to actually see Brooke being born. He had assumed he would have to wait outside with the others and only later meet his baby, but Jared surprised him by finding a way to have Jensen there. He couldn’t love Jared more at this moment if he tried. He feels so nervous, he wants to see his baby’s face but he also wants to make sure Jared is okay. Once the doctor starts, Jared looks at him and silently asks Jensen to come closer. Jensen obliges and stands behind Jared’s head, caressing his face with a hand and keeping an eye on what the doctors are doing. He can see the woman cutting Jared’s belly open, and even though it’s hard to watch Jensen doesn’t avert his eyes, he doesn’t want to miss anything.

She fumbles with Jared’s belly for a while, and after what seems like a lifetime, she pulls a tiny bundle out. Jensen feels his heart stopping but he also remembers to snap some pictures, this is the most important moment of all, and he wants to register it forever.

A small cry fills up the room, and Jensen’s own eyes tear up. He looks down at Jared, who also has tears streaming down the sides of his face into his hair.

“She’s here, Jay!”

Jared smiles through the tears. “Oh my god, my baby!”

Doctor Ruth turns to Jensen. “Do you want to cut the umbilical cord?”

Jensen nods, honored that he gets to do it. One of the nurses motions for him to give her the camera. “I’ve got it, don’t worry. Enjoy the moment.”

Jensen happily gives her the camera and comes closer to the baby. She’s covered in fluids and screaming out of her lungs, and yet she’s the most beautiful thing he has ever seen. The doctor instructs Jensen on how to cut the cord and he does it. Then the nurse quickly shows the baby to Jared before taking her to be cleaned and examined. Jensen goes back to Jared’s side, who is still crying.

“Is she okay Jen?”

Jensen smiles and kisses Jared’s forehead. “She’s fine, Jay. They are just checking on her and getting her measured, weighted and all that stuff. You will get to see her in just a few, don’t worry.”

“Go stay with her, Jen. I can wait. Please, go.”

Jensen nods, kissing Jared once more before going to stand close to the baby as the nurses work on her. She’s so tiny and beautiful and perfect, and Jensen finds himself with fresh tears in his eyes. He can’t stop looking at her.

Eventually the nurse wraps her up in a blanket and picks her up, offering the baby to Jensen. He feels nervous, he’s not used to holding newborns, but he finds out he wants nothing more than to hold Brooke. So he carefully takes her from the nurse, holding her securely in the crook of his arm. When he takes a closer look at her face, Jensen feels something so fierce, so deep, that he almost feels dizzy. The only thing keeping him grounded is the fact that he’s holding his daughter, and he needs to protect her.

“Hi, Brooke. It’s me, Papa. I couldn’t wait to meet you. Do you want to go meet your Daddy? He can’t wait to meet you either!”

Jensen takes Brooke to Jared and places her on the pillow right next to Jared’s head, keeping a secure hold of her.

“Hi, Daddy!”

Jared moves his head closer to the baby so he can bury his face in her blanket. New tears flood his eyes as he meets his baby for the first time.

“Hi, Brooke. It’s so good to finally meet you. You’ve been with me for months and I couldn’t wait to see your face. Daddy waited so long for you and he loves you more than anything, okay?” Jared then looks up at Jensen. “She’s perfect, Jen.”

Jensen smiles at him and leans down to kiss Jared’s forehead while still holding Brooke. He can hear the nurse snapping picture after picture and he knows for a fact those will be the most beautiful photos of all.

“Thank you,” Jensen whispers against Jared’s skin.

As Jensen holds Jared and Brooke at the same time, he realizes it doesn’t matter in the slightest that he didn’t make Brooke with Jared. Some things go way deeper than blood and this is one of them. Jensen loves these two people more than anything, he has never felt something so deep and pure for anyone. He finally has a family, it may not have started the traditional way but Jensen wouldn’t change it for anything else in the world.

This is truly his home.

*

Jared and Brooke are taken to the recovery room before being allowed back to his own room, and Jensen goes to the waiting room to share the news with everyone once he’s gotten rid of the gown, mask and cap. When his parents and Chad spot him, they all get up with matching expectant looks on their faces.

“So?” Donna asks, taking a step forward.

Jensen smiles at them. “She’s perfect and very beautiful. She’s doing okay and Jared too, both are in the recovery room and will be back in their room in a couple of hours.”

Everyone cheers and Jensen shows the pictures of Brooke on his camera, careful to hide those where he’s sharing a moment with Jared. Donna coos over the pictures, saying she just can’t wait to meet her granddaughter, and even Alan looks touched. Chad pulls Jensen to the side and speaks close to his ear so Donna and Alan can’t hear.

“Congratulations, dad.”

Jensen smiles and feels emotional again. He’s a father. He’s a father to the most beautiful girl and he misses her already.

As they wait, they go to the cafeteria to grab something to eat since Jensen is starving, and then finally after a long wait Jared is brought back to his room and everyone can go see him. Once they enter, Donna goes straight to the bassinet where Brooke is sleeping peacefully to meet her, and Alan and Chad follow her. Jensen takes the opportunity to check on Jared.

“How are you doing?” He asks in a very low voice, caressing Jared’s hair since nobody is paying attention to them.

Jared smiles at him tiredly. “Kinda sore and hurting but that’s normal. Takes some time to recover from the c-section. But I’m mostly happy.”

Jensen smiles back at him and then goes to check on Brooke himself as everyone else finally takes an interest in Jared. He wants to hold her but she’s so quiet right now, so Jensen just watches her, amazed. She’s holding the blanket with her tiny, tiny fingers and Jensen is already a goner.

They spend some time with Jared and Brooke, eventually the baby starts crying and the nurse comes politely asking everyone to step outside since Jared is gonna try and nurse her. Once they are in the hallway, Donna speaks.

“Well, one of us should spend the night with Jared here. I could do it.”

Jensen makes a face, he truly wants to spend the night himself but he doesn’t know how to suggest it without sounding suspicious. Alan gives Jensen a strange look and turns to his wife.

“Honey, it’s not good for you to spend so much time in a hospital. You just recovered from cancer and your immune system isn’t that strong yet. It’s better to be safe than sorry. Maybe the boys don’t mind doing this favor, perhaps Jensen could stay with Jared tonight and Chad could do it tomorrow if it’s okay with them?”

Jensen can’t believe his ears, is Alan actually helping them? Well, he isn’t looking a gifted horse in the mouth. Jensen tries to look nonchalant as he answers.

“Yeah, sure. I can stay with Jared, it's no problem. Just gonna head home to grab some stuff and take you guys, then I’ll come back.”

When they are allowed back in the room, Jared tells them how it was. “Feels weird and she is still getting the hang of it, she kind of fell asleep in the middle of it. But I guess it just takes some getting used to.”

Jensen suddenly wants to see Jared nursing Brooke, and he hopes he gets to see it later. Donna starts giving him some tips, and then tells Jared that Jensen will be spending the night with him. Jared’s face lights up like it’s Christmas.

“Really?”

Jensen shrugs. “Well, just so you won’t be alone for tonight. Chad will keep you company tomorrow. I’ll just drive them home and grab some stuff and will be right back.”

Everyone says their goodbyes to Jared and Brooke, and Jensen is the last to leave the room, blowing a kiss to Jared before closing the door.

Jensen drives home, takes a quick shower and grabs a change of clothes and some toiletries, and then drives back to the hospital in record time. Once he opens the door to Jared’s room, he finds his boyfriend holding Brooke on the bed. He smiles at the sight and Jared smiles back.

“I can’t believe you got away with spending the night here.”

“Well, it was actually my dad who suggested it because it’s not wise for my mom to spend so much time in a hospital after her treatment.”

Jared lifts an eyebrow. “Whoa, we owe him a fruit basket then!”

Jensen chuckles and comes closer, leaning down to give Brooke a kiss. “I missed her already.” He then kisses Jared. “You too. Couldn’t wait for us to be alone.”

“Me neither. Want to hold her?”

Jensen nods eagerly and goes to wash his hands. Then he takes Brooke from Jared and holds her close to his face.

“Hey baby! Papa missed you so much! Aren’t you the cutest little doll? Oh yes you are!”

Jared laughs. “Oh man, you’re such a goner already! Brooke has you wrapped around her tiny finger!”

Jensen nods. “True that. And look who’s talking! We are gonna spoil her rotten!”

“Well, I’m gonna try to be the tough daddy because I know for a fact that you won’t be able to resist her.”

Jensen lifts an eyebrow. “Well, if she has the same puppy dog eyes that you do, I won’t stand a chance.”

Jared smiles tenderly as he watches Jensen holding the baby. “I think she looks like you.”

Jensen gives Jared a sad smile. “I wish.”

Jared shrugs. “Well, we never know. Maybe if we both wish really hard, she could have green eyes like yours.”

Jensen walks back to Jared and sits on the bed next to him, kissing his temple. “She is perfect no matter what.”

They spend some time just enjoying Brooke, and eventually she starts to complain. Jared takes her from Jensen and positions her so she can nurse. Jensen wraps an arm around Jared and just watches him feeding their baby, and it’s such a magical moment. Jared makes a face as if it’s kind of uncomfortable, so Jensen holds him tighter and presses his lips against Jared’s temple, murmuring sweet nothings to him. Once Brooke is done Jensen takes her to help with the burping. They are already a team.

Brooke looks sleepy but kind of grumpy, so Jensen walks around the room with her, singing the lullaby he chose to her in a soft voice.

_Wise men say_   
_Only fools rush in_   
_But I can't help falling in love with you_

_Shall I stay?_   
_Would it be a sin_   
_If I can't help falling in love with you?_

It works like a charm and Brooke pretty much melts in Jensen’s arms, falling into a peaceful slumber with her little mouth partially open, looking like an angel. Jared smiles at the scene.

“She recognizes your voice from inside my belly.”

Jensen lights up with pride and holds her for a little longer before placing her in the bassinet right next to Jared’s bed, who also looks sleepy. So he lowers the bed and sits next to Jared, caressing his hair and also singing to him until he falls asleep himself. Then Jensen changes into sweatpants and makes himself comfortable in the tiny cot in the room, but not before kissing Jared and Brooke goodnight.

*

Jared spends a couple more days at the hospital, and Jensen stays with him as much as he can. Donna and Chad also take turns, Donna wants to stay with Jared as much as she can so she can spend time with her granddaughter. She’s also feeling melancholy because Brock isn’t here to meet his daughter. Jensen fills out some forms at the hospital to get Brooke registered, and shares the news with Jared once they’re alone.

“So Brooke is officially our daughter?” Jared asks, and Jensen nods.

“Yeah well, that’s what I wrote in the form. The birth certificate will be sent to us in a month.”

Jared frowns. “What will Donna say when she reads your name as the father of the baby?”

Jensen kisses Jared’s temple. “She doesn’t have to read the certificate. And besides, maybe she will learn the truth about us before that. I am tired of hiding, that’s for sure.”

When Donna asks later if the baby is already registered and if Brock is listed as the father, Jensen gives her the only answer he can right now, since it’s not quite the moment to discuss the matter.

“Well mom, she is definitely an Ackles. Don’t worry about that.”

Donna doesn’t press further and for that Jensen is glad.

Chad surprisingly can’t stay with Jared that night as planned since he has to work until pretty late at a photoshoot. So he asks Jensen if he could please stay with Jared one more night if that’s not too much trouble for him, and that he will owe him one for it.

Jensen loves Chad.

Jared is discharged on the following afternoon alongside Brooke, who is as healthy as she can be. Donna wants to throw a small welcome party to Jared and Brooke, and Jensen volunteers to go pick them up from the hospital. Once he arrives, he helps Jared change into street clothes and also changes Brooke’s diaper and dresses her into the moose and squirrel onesie and a beautiful headband with a delicate bow. She looks so beautiful and Jensen feels emotional at finally seeing Brooke wearing the onesie he gave her so long ago.

After signing the discharge papers, a nurse comes with a wheelchair to take Jared to the parking lot. Jensen places Brooke on his arms and walks alongside them holding all the bags and a giant pink balloon saying _It’s a Girl!. _Jensen smiles from ear to ear all the way because he’s a proud papa. Once they reach the car, Jensen takes the baby and very carefully places her in the car seat, buckling her up securely - he has read the manual a dozen times and practiced with a doll - and then helps Jared into the passenger seat. Once they’re both inside the car, Jensen turns to Jared.

“Ready, Daddy?”

Jared takes a look at the backseat where he can see Brooke sleeping peacefully, and then smiles at Jensen.

“All ready, Papa.”

Jensen pulls Jared for a sweet kiss before starting the drive home.

Once they arrive home, Jensen takes the carseat and carries Brooke inside, alongside Jared. Donna, Chad and even Alan cheer when they arrive, and Donna comes running to collect the baby from Jensen. They all have a nice early dinner together, the atmosphere is great with Brooke’s presence. A new life has the power to lift everyone’s spirits.

_ **Jared** _

Jared has been back home for a week and he has never experienced such emotions. Having Brooke was the most amazing experience in his life, and he loves her more than he could ever tell. She’s beautiful and perfect and he misses her even when he goes to take a shower. Of course it’s not a walk in the park, she’s a newborn after all. It hurts a little to breastfeed but he sucks it up, after all he’s feeding his baby and that’s all that matters. Plus he knows Jensen loves to watch him nursing Brooke and it warms his heart.

Jensen has been helping a lot with Brooke, he really took on the role of her other father. He often changes her diapers, helps her to burp after nursing, he is learning how to give her a bath, and he loves to dress her. Jared just loves to watch Jensen with her, he’s a natural and Jared can see how much Jensen loves her, it doesn’t matter they don’t share the same blood. Their bond goes way deeper than that. Jensen also spends the nights with Jared as he used to do, sneaking out before morning comes so Donna won’t see him. He helps when Brooke starts crying in the middle of the night, going to get her from her crib and bringing her to Jared so she can be fed. And again, he helps burping her and changes her when needed. Jared is lucky to have Jensen with him, he’s proving more and more to be an amazing father.

And of course, things go to shit a lot sooner than Jared imagined.

A couple of days later, it’s the middle of the afternoon and Jared is nursing Brooke on his bed. Jensen has just come home from doing a photoshoot and joins Jared, telling him about it and Jared listens to it eagerly. Brooke then sucks on his nipple harder and Jared flinches, so Jensen places an arm around him and presses his lips against his temple as he does sometimes, to help him feel better.

And that’s how Donna finds them, when she enters Jared’s room without knocking to check on the baby.

Her eyes widen in horror when she sees Jared and Jensen in an obvious intimate moment, and she brings a hand to her mouth.

“What on Earth do you both think you’re doing??”

**TO BE CONTINUED...**


	16. Chapter 16

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey again guys! thank you again for all your lovely comments! We had the amazing birth of Brooke and our boys becoming parents on the last chapter... and now what happens? 
> 
> We have a very special and important moment in this chapter. And now things start to get serious. Who guessed right?
> 
> Please share your thoughts with me! Thank you for reading!

_**Jared** _

Jared’s heart stops and he swallows hard, no clue about what to say.

“Donna, I--well, this is not what it seems, I…”

Jared tries to get away from Jensen, but apparently he has other plans since he just tightens his hold on Jared.

“No, Jay. We are not hiding anymore, this has gone too far.” Jensen kisses Jared’s temple and gets up from the bed, fully facing Donna who is looking horrified.

“That’s right, mom. It’s exactly what you saw, me and Jared are together. I love him and as I’m a lucky person, he loves me right back, and nothing will change that.”

Donna looks from Jensen to Jared and back to him. “Are you both insane?? What the hell are you thinking , there’s absolutely no way this can happen! Jared just had your brother’s child, this is betrayal! You’re betraying Brock’s memory!”

“Mom, Brock is not…”

“Jensen!” Jared cuts Jensen off before he can do something stupid, it’s not time for another reveal today, one is more than enough. Jensen looks back at Jared, who gives him a look and shakes his head. He takes the opportunity to take Brooke off his chest since she is done feeding, and places her on his shoulder so she can burp. Jensen nods at Jared as he watches the scene, apparently calming himself down, and then looks back at Donna.

“Look mom, I’m sorry, okay? This is not how we wanted for you to find out, but we aren’t ashamed of it. Brock isn’t here anymore, we aren’t cheating on anyone. None of us predicted this, you know we didn’t get along in the beginning. But it happened, we fell in love, and we are gonna be together no matter what. I’m gonna raise Brooke as if she were my child, I already feel like she is. I want to start a family with Jared and Brooke.”

“Is this why you broke up with Danneel?” Donna’s voice sounds colder now and Jared is worried.

“Yes,” Jensen nods. “I never loved her, and it became even clearer once I met Jared. It would be a mistake to marry her when I love someone else.”

Donna studies both of them for a while, and for a moment Jared has hope that it will go well but then that hope gets crushed when Donna’s face becomes angry and she shakes her head.

“No! This just cannot happen, I don’t care Brock isn’t here anymore, this is still a betrayal to his memory! I welcomed you in this house Jared, just for you to go and what, seduce my other son? Wasn’t one enough? I had suspicions about you two but I turned a blind eye, I didn’t want to believe it because it was too horrible. I won’t allow this kind of thing to happen in my house, you hear me? So you better end this insanity right now if you know any better!”

With that, Donna turns and storms out of the room. Jared is frozen in place, holding Brooke against him, deeply hurt with Donna’s insinuation that Jared seduced Brock and later Jensen. Why does everyone keep thinking he’s a freeloader? He looks at Jensen with tears in his eyes.

“Do you also think I seduced you?”

Jensen’s face morphs from anger to sympathy in a second as he rushes to sit next to Jared, wiping a tear that falls down his cheek.

“Of course not, love. You know that’s not true, please don’t listen to her.”

Jared sniffs. “Sorry, too many hormones I guess. What are we going to do now, Jen?”

Jensen gets up from the bed and springs into action. “We are not gonna stay here anymore. We can go to my apartment and stay there for now. You in?”

Jared nods. “As long as I get to stay with you and my baby, I’m good anywhere.”

Jensen kisses Jared chastely. “I told you I’ll protect you both. Can you pack up a few things and I’ll go to my room do the same? I’ll be back in a few minutes.”

Jared nods, and as Jensen leaves he places Brooke in the middle of his bed and tries to suck it up so he can do what Jensen has asked. He wishes they didn’t have to leave like this, but if Donna refuses to understand it, they have no other choice. So Jared puts a few clothes into a backpack along with his toiletry bag, and then packs some stuff for Brooke. Jensen is back in less than ten minutes.

“Ready to go?”

Jared nods, and Jensen picks up everything Jared packed, leaving him only to carry the baby and her diaper bag.

“Let’s go, then.”

Jared feels horrible as they walk down the stairs and find Donna in the living room with Alan. She still looks pissed and Alan looks stressed, they were clearly discussing what Donna just found out. She turns to them and takes in all the stuff Jensen is carrying.

“Where do you think you’re going?”

Jensen steps down in front of Jared. “We are not thinking anything. We are going to my apartment, we will be staying there for now.”

Donna frowns, clearly taken aback. “But why?”

Jensen lifts an eyebrow. “Didn’t you say you weren’t allowing me and Jared to be together in this house? So we are going to be together in my apartment. Because there’s not a chance in hell we aren’t staying together.”

Donna looks from Jensen to Brooke in Jared’s arms. “Are you--are you taking my granddaughter?”

“Of course I am,” Jared answers. “She’s my daughter, she’s going with me wherever I go.”

Donna scoffs. “You have no right to take my grandchild away from me!”

“Donna, we are not leaving to keep Brooke away from you. We are leaving so we can build our life together.”

“We would love if you could be a part of this moment, mom.” Jensen adds, pursing his lips. “But as long as you can’t accept that Brock is gone, you’re gonna deny us the right to be happy.”

Donna replies raising her voice. “You have the right to be happy and I have the right to worship the memory of my son!”

“I’m your son too, mom.” Jensen says in a hurtful tone. “And there are other ways to worship the deceased than to punish the living. I loved Brock, and I feel very guilty that I couldn’t demonstrate this while he was here like I should have. But I won’t be kept hostage of this guilt forever.”

Jared takes a step forward. “Donna, I love Jensen. So much. And he loves me back. I’m sure wherever Brock is, he is looking down at us and sending his blessing.”

“Sorry it has to be this way mom, but you give us no other choice. I’m not letting the love of my life go, just because you can’t approve of us. You’re welcome to visit Brooke whenever you want.” Jensen places an arm around Jared and guides him to the door. “Come on, Jay.”

Jared looks at Donna and purses his lips. He goes with Jensen, feeling his heart breaking for having to do this. When Jensen opens the door, Donna calls after them.

“Wait!”

Both men turn around and wait expectantly. Donna moves towards them and closes the door.

“Don’t… don’t go please. I can’t stay away from my granddaughter like this. This is too much for me.”

“I’m sorry mom, but we can’t stay here if you don’t accept us. Because this,” Jensen makes a motion to show himself and Jared, “won’t change. Ever.”

Donna studies both of them for a long moment, and it’s like Jared and Jensen are holding a collective breath as they wait. Finally, after what seems like a century, Donna opens her arms and pulls them for a tight hug. Jared hugs her back with one arm and feels his eyes welling up. Once she pulls away, she stares at both of them.

“Okay. I can try. I’m not saying I’m fine with this right now, because I’m not. It was too much of a shock to me and I need some time. But I promise I will try. I just need to wrap my head around this situation. But please, don’t take my grandchild away. And I don’t want to be away from both of you either. Please stay.”

Jensen looks at Jared, who still feels hurt by Donna’s words, and he speaks with a broken voice. “Do you honestly think I seduced Jensen after Brock died?”

Donna brings both hands to her face, her eyes moistening. “Oh my God, no! I’m so sorry I said that Jared, it was a spur of the moment! I promise I don’t think that of you. Please believe me.”

Jared nods, still hurt because those things take some time to heal, he’s a Cancer after all and he’s even more emotional now. He turns to Jensen. “Yeah, we can stay. I’ll go to my room.”

Jared starts walking to the stairs without looking at anyone and Jensen rushes to follow him after giving his parents a hard look. Once they reach Jared’s bedroom, he goes to the nursery to put Brooke in the crib. He stares at his baby for a long moment until Jensen wraps both arms around him.

“You okay?”

Jared shrugs, his throat too tight to speak. Jensen kisses his neck.

“It’s gonna get better, love. You’ll see. Now she knows about us, we don’t have to hide anymore. She needs some time but I know she will accept us. She will realize we love each other and there’s nothing wrong with it.”

Jared nods, swallowing hard. “There’s only the fact that we are hiding one more important fact from her. I can’t even imagine her reaction when she learns the truth, Jen.”

Jensen makes Jared turn around to face him. “I know. I think it’s better if we wait for a while until we tell her. It was enough of a shock for her to learn about us, let’s give her a few weeks to tell the other thing. But no matter what, we are gonna be fine. We are gonna be together, you hear me?”

Jared nods, his tears finally falling free. Jensen pulls Jared to a hug, and Jared wraps his arms tightly around him, burying his face in Jensen’s neck.

God help them all.

*

Things actually go smoothly over the next few weeks. Jared can see that Donna is at least trying to accept Jensen and him together. They’re also helping by not showing too much affection in front of her, but they aren’t hiding anymore either and that’s a huge relief. It feels amazing not having to hide his feelings for Jensen, and Jared knows that Jensen is also relieved that he doesn’t have to hide how much he cares and takes care of Brooke since he made sure Donna knew he plans on raising Brooke as his child. It feels like a portion of the weight has been lifted from Jared’s shoulders. Jensen, Alan and him had a talk and decided it was indeed better to wait a few weeks to approach Donna with the other subject since she needs some time to adjust to the first big news. They’ve waited so long already, a little more time won’t hurt.

Jared knows Donna is trying especially since she doesn’t want to be away from her granddaughter, she has grown very attached to the baby already and Jared is also counting on this for when they go tell her The Truth. But for now he allows himself to enjoy what he has, a beautiful baby, a perfect man who adores him and who he loves so much in return, and everything else. Jared can’t help the nagging feeling inside of him that this perfect life he has now won’t last long, that something will happen to shatter everything because that’s what always happens to him and also, there are a lot of things that could happen. Jared sometimes has dreams about what Jeff and Justin could do to him, and more often than not they end with him losing his baby and Jensen. Jared wakes up feeling stressed, but Jensen is always there with strong arms around him and Jared feels better for the moment. But the feeling is always present.

Speaking of, Jensen has pretty much moved to Jared’s room. He spends every night in Jared’s bed and doesn’t sneak out at the break of dawn anymore. Jared is already used to having Jensen in his bed, waking up with his beautiful face by his side is the perfect start for a day.

Jared has also started dedicating himself more to a passion of his which is cooking. He has learned a lot from his grandma and has always loved to cook, but ever since coming to the Ackles’ residence he didn’t feel comfortable doing it. However lately he started joining Loretta in the kitchen, bringing Brooke, and risking some recipes. He has been watching a lot of cooking channels on You Tube and tries to recreate the dishes. Everyone in the house has tried his creations and they all approve, Jensen being the one who praises Jared the most. And he promises it’s not only because he loves Jared so much, he truly thinks Jared is talented. And this helps Jared a lot so he can occupy his mind a little and not feel so useless. Maybe in the future he could take some cooking classes. He would like that.

Brooke turns one month old before Jared knows it, and his baby is growing so beautiful and big. He can’t believe how much she has changed already in only thirty days. He never gets tired of looking at her, her perfect little features. Jensen said she has Jared’s mouth, and he can see how she’s gonna have light eyes, maybe green. Jared really hopes she has green eyes that are somewhat similar to Jensen’s. That would be awesome.

In the afternoon, Jensen arrives home with a shopping bag. He looks excited and Jared lifts an eyebrow.

“What do you have there, Jen?”

Jensen smiles and reaches inside the bag, coming out with a tiny purple dress. “Ta-da!”

Jared smiles fondly as he sees the pretty dress. “Jen, that’s so beautiful!”

Jensen closes the distance and takes Brooke from Jared after kissing him hello. “This is so we can take some pictures of Brooke to celebrate her being one month old. We are gonna do this every month until she turns one.”

Jared’s smile grows wider and he claps his hands together. “Jen, that’s an amazing idea! It’s gonna be an awesome thing to have when she’s older!”

Jensen also smiles wider, relieved that Jared likes the idea, and he turns to Brooke using his Papa voice.

“Let’s take some pretty pictures of you, baby girl? You’re gonna look so beautiful! Oh yes you will!”

Jensen hands Brooke to Jared telling him to go change her into the dress and little purple shoes he also gives him - and not to forget a bow too - while he goes set things up in the backyard. Jared does as asked and when he takes Brooke outside, he sees that Jensen somehow created a big number 1 made of flowers, and it’s gorgeous. They position Brooke next to it on the grass and Jensen climbs on a stool, taking several pictures of her. They all turn out gorgeous of course, and Jared feels so happy. Later Loretta bakes a small cake so they can celebrate, and Donna and Alan give Brooke a small gift even though Jared has told them that it was not necessary. The truth is, Jared loves the demonstrations of love his daughter gets, it’s much more than he could ask for. He can’t wait for the next months to come and he only hopes they are all as happy as this.

*

A couple of weeks later, it’s Jared’s birthday. He’s excited about it because he gets to spend it with his amazing baby girl and his also amazing boyfriend, and he knows it’s going to be an amazing birthday just for these two reasons alone. But when Jared wakes up in the morning, Jensen is not in bed with him. He usually leaves early on weekdays since he’s been doing a lot of photoshoots, but it’s Saturday and he should be in bed. Jared sighs and gets up, going to the nursery to get Brooke, only to find the crib empty. Irrational panic takes over him for a minute, he has had countless nightmares where his baby is taken from him and this looks like one of them. Jared hurries to the window and finally lets out a huge breath. In the backyard are Jensen and Brooke, he’s holding her while sitting on a loveseat. Once Jared manages to calm down enough, he’s able to smile at the tender scene. He can’t see much from up here so he decides to join them.

After washing his face and brushing his teeth, Jared goes to the backyard and approaches them, but since he’s coming from behind Jensen doesn’t notice him, so Jared decides to just observe. Jensen has a fond smile on his face as he is apparently talking to Brooke, who is looking intently at him, as if she’s very interested in whatever Jensen is saying.

“...your Daddy’s birthday Brooke. It’s a very special day, you knew that? I was going to bring him breakfast in bed but then you decided to get fussy and I wanted him to sleep a little longer, so here we are. You just love to steal your old folks’ thunder huh? Lucky for you, you are adorable and we love you so much.” Jared smiles lovingly at the pair, and keeps watching. “You know Brooke, someday I’m gonna tell you all about our story, me and your Daddy’s. It had an odd start but oh boy, how I love that shaggy-haired giant. You’re gonna love it.”

Jared chuckles and Jensen turns around, startled. “Jay! How long have you been standing there?”

Jared moves to sit next to Jensen. “Just a few moments. You two were being so adorable together, I wanted to just observe you with her.”

Jensen smiles shyly. “Sorry I took her, she started crying and I didn’t want her to wake you up.”

Jared decides not to mention his scare, it was silly anyway. “Jen, she’s your daughter too. You can take her anytime you want. By the way, did I hear something about breakfast?”

Jensen’s smile grows wider. “Oh yes. That reminds me,” Jensen pulls Jared towards him, minding Brooke between them, and wraps his free arm around him, planting a kiss on his temple. “Happy Birthday, love. May all your wishes come true.”

Jared frames Jensen’s face and gives him a long and sweet kiss, using his other hand to caress Brooke’s little head. Once they break apart, Jared presses his forehead against Jensen’s and gives him a fond smile.

“They already have.”

Jensen smiles back and they share a long moment, which is broken by Brooke wailing. Jensen chuckles.

“I think our daughter needs to have breakfast before us.”

Jared takes Brooke from Jensen and starts nursing her. Jensen places his arms around both of them as Jared feeds their baby. His birthday is off to a perfect start.

*

Jared has an amazing birthday. Loretta cooks an amazing breakfast for them, and then Jensen takes Jared and Brooke to spend the day out. They go spend some time at the botanical garden, sitting with Brooke by the lake to introduce the place to her. It’s a beautiful summer day and they just chill under a tree for a long time. Jensen had brought his guitar so he spends some time singing to the both of them, which makes Jared almost melt from so much love. Jensen also brought his camera with him, so he takes pictures of Jared with Brooke, then sets the camera on a tripod so he can also be included in the pictures. Jared also takes the camera so he can snap some pictures of only Jensen and Brooke. Of course they aren’t as professional as the ones Jensen takes, but his boyfriend promises he loves them so much.

Later they go to the mall for lunch and walk around a bit, pushing Brooke in her stroller. More than a handful of women stop them to coo over the baby and tell them how cute she is and how beautiful their family is, which makes Jared light up with pride. After returning home, they have a small birthday party, only them, Donna, Alan and Chad. There’s chocolate cake and some other delicious treats, and everyone sings happy birthday to Jared - Jensen holds Brooke while they sing and makes her clap her tiny hands together for him, causing Jared to tear up. When it’s time to blow the candle and make a wish, Jared just asks to be able to keep his little family and carry on with his happiness beside Jensen and Brooke.

They all hang out in the living room for a while, until finally Donna and Alan excuse themselves to go to bed. Chad follows shortly after, giving Jared another hug and going to the boathouse.

Jensen looks at Jared and smirks at him. “Finally! I’ll be right back.”

Jensen hurries up the stairs and Jared waits with Brooke. He places her on the couch so she can stretch herself and plays with her until Jensen returns. He hands Jared a package.

“Happy Birthday, my love.”

Jared’s eyes widen. He had been so focused on the perfect day he is having that he completely forgot that Jensen would much likely give him a present. He takes the present from Jensen and opens it. It looks like a book, leather-bound. On the cover, written in gold letters, are the words _Jared & Brooke_. Jared’s heart beats faster as he opens it and flips through the pages. It’s the pregnancy book Jensen promised him, has all the photos he took throughout the months. It’s beautiful and perfect and Jared has tears in his eyes as he looks up at Jensen.

“Jen, this is amazing. I don’t even know what to say. Thank you.”

Jensen sits down next to Jared and places an arm around him, kissing his temple. “It was my pleasure doing it. The model helped a lot, he is so gorgeous.”

Jared smiles at Jensen and feels a thousand emotions bubbling up inside him. He has a sudden desire, having Jensen so close to him, and he makes a decision. He wants to give himself another birthday present. To both of them actually.

“Wanna go upstairs?”

Jensen smiles and takes Brooke from the couch. “Definitely.”

*

After feeding Brooke, Jared goes take a shower and tries to calm his nerves under the hot spray. He looks down at himself and has his doubts, but he really wants to do it. It’s definitely time and hopefully Jensen is on board.

After going through his nightly routine, Jared steps out of the bathroom and he can see Jensen in the nursery putting Brooke in her crib. Jared goes to the bedroom door and locks it just as Jensen steps out of the nursery, and he frowns at Jared.

“Why are you locking the door?”

Jared smirks at him. “So nobody comes in. I hope you can be quiet.”

Jensen’s frown deepens, as he tries to figure out what Jared means. Suddenly his eyebrows shoot up. “Oh my--do you mean…”

Jared tries to smile at him seductively. “Why don’t you grab the baby monitor and close the door to the nursery?” They usually leave the door open so they can hear Brooke, but maybe it’s wiser to close it tonight, Jared doesn’t want to traumatize their baby even if she’s a month and a half old.

Jensen does as asked and in a couple of seconds he’s closing the nursery door with the baby monitor in hand, which he places on the dresser. He slowly approaches Jared with an intense look on his face.

“Do you mean what I think you mean?”

Jared nods, returning the look. “Definitely. It’s time.”

“Jay,” Jensen starts, placing a hand on Jared’s neck. “We don’t have to do anything if you’re not ready. I told you I’m okay with waiting.”

Jared smiles at him, his heart exploding with love for this man in front of him, realizing once more how much he respects him. It makes Jared even more sure of his decision. He takes a step forward to close the distance between them.

“Oh, but I want to. A lot. I mean…” Jared looks down at himself and back at Jensen. “I know I’m not in the best shape right now since I just had Brooke and haven’t been working out but if you don’t mind…”

Jensen doesn’t wait for Jared to finish, he surges forward and frames Jared’s face with both hands, fusing their lips together and kissing him passionately.

“Are you kidding?” Jensen breathes out between kisses. “You look gorgeous just as you are right now, it has been a torture to keep my hands off you!”

Jared gives him a half smile. “Now you don’t have to anymore.”

Jensen looks at him with his pupils dilated and bites his bottom lip. “Oh, good.” He places his arms around Jared and brings him close, pressing their bodies together and kissing him again, walking them to the bed. The back of Jared’s knees hit the frame and he falls backwards. He pushes himself up the bed, as Jensen gets on his hands and knees on top of him. Jensen is looking at him with such desire that makes Jared’s dick stir in his boxers. Jensen takes off his own shirt, and places both hands on the hem of Jared’s. Once Jared nods, Jensen takes his shirt off too, and takes a second to admire his body. Jared feels shy for a moment, his belly is still rounded, but Jensen just leans down and kisses him.

“You look perfect.”

Jensen places both hands on him and kisses his way down his jaw, neck and chest. He tentatively licks one nipple and Jared moans. Jensen hums his pleasure and does it again, licking around the areola and kissing his nipple carefully. He doesn’t bite it since he knows Jared’s nipples are too sensitive from the nursing, and biting could actually hurt him, and Jared loves Jensen a little more for being so attentive. Jensen gives the other nipple the same attention, and continues down, kissing his belly and finally lowering his boxers a bit. Jensen exposes Jared’s scar from the c-section, which is still tender as well, and plants sweet kisses on it. Looking up at Jared for confirmation, Jensen takes off his boxers, and his eyes widen at what he sees.

“Holy shit, Jay!” He’s almost drooling as he looks at Jared’s dick, and after throwing the boxers away, Jensen carefully wraps a hand around the member, running his thumb up and down Jared’s shaft, causing it to grow harder and Jared to almost see stars. He needs to control himself not to come right there and embarrass himself to death, it has been that long. And Jensen’s touch is just _perfect_. Jensen licks his lips without taking his eyes off Jared’s dick.

“I want to put my mouth on you so bad right now.”

Jensen quickly looks at Jared who only nods, his breath even more erratic. Jensen leans down and captures the head of Jared’s cock in his mouth, and Jared grabs the sheets with both hands as he feels the warmth and wetness surrounding him.

“Oh my God,” he pants. Jensen moans around his dick, holding the base with a hand and placing the other around Jared’s hip. Jensen swallows Jared deeper until he hits the back of Jensen’s throat. Jensen then starts bobbing his head up and down and Jared breathes even harder, a hand grabbing Jensen’s hair and Jared tries not to close his eyes shut, he wants to watch Jensen suck him because that’s the most amazing view ever. Jensen sucks him harder and squeezes his balls, and it’s no long before Jared is coming. He tries to warn Jensen so he could move away, but Jensen just shakes his head while looking at Jared. So he comes inside his mouth, eyes finally closing shut, biting the back of his hand as not to scream Jensen’s name out loud. He whispers it instead, over and over, like a chant. Before Jared opens his eyes Jensen is in his face, batting his hand away and kissing him, making Jared taste his own come combined with Jensen’s own taste. It’s amazing.

“Did you like that, baby?” Jensen murmurs against Jared’s lips as he lies half on top of him.

Jared nods. “Oh God, yes. But now I want you inside me, Jen.”

Suddenly Jensen pulls back and he looks uncertain. Jared frowns. “What’s wrong? You don’t--don’t want to be inside me?”

Jensen shakes his head and repositions himself so he’s off Jared, and sits up looking down at him, caressing his hair. He looks shy all of the sudden.

“It’s not that Jay. I just… well, I’ve never… I mean, I’ve never topped for a guy before.”

Jared’s surprise is so huge he also sits up on the bed and faces Jensen. “What??”

Jensen shrugs, looking down, his cheeks turning a faint shade of pink. “J--_he_ was my first guy, and the only man I’ve ever been with. He never let me top, only bottom for him.”

Jensen still won’t face Jared as he admits that, probably feeling ashamed, and Jared places a hand under Jensen’s chin, making him look up. “Jen, do you _want_ to bottom?” Jared was never a top, he would do it for Jensen if he only wanted to bottom but he doesn’t feel that’s the case. “Or you only did it because Jeff told you to?”

“I never wanted to be a bottom.” Jensen snorts. “I’m pathetic, aren’t I?”

Jared smiles kindly at him, caressing his cheek and pulling him close for a kiss. “You’re not pathetic, you were under a spell, that’s all. But I’ve gotta tell you… I’m excited because I get to be your first in a way.”

Jensen finally smiles genuinely, and gives Jared another kiss, more passionate this time. “You’re right,” he murmurs against his face. “You’re gonna be the only guy I’ve been inside of. Can’t wait to feel you around me, Jay.”

Jared feels heat growing inside him again as Jensen lies him down one more time, spending some time just making out with him, and Jared feels Jensen’s erection pressing against his thigh, causing his own dick to stir again.

“You’re ready for this?” Jensen pulls back enough to look at Jared in the eye. He looks serious and Jared knows he would stop if he asked. Jared nods.

“More than ever.”

Jensen frowns. “Do you have stuff by any chance?”

“Bottom drawer,” Jared makes a motion to the nightstand with his head.

Jensen lifts an eyebrow. “Oh really?”

Jared smirks. “I wanted to be prepared, we never know!”

Jensen chuckles and reaches into the drawer, picking up a bottle of lube and a condom. He stares at the condom.

“Wish we didn’t need it. I want to feel all of you around me.”

Jared shakes his head. “Nope. I’m a carrier, remember? We need to wear a condom for now until I can get on birth control again unless you want to have another baby.”

Jensen smirks. “Having you all pregnant and gorgeous again with another baby? Oh don’t tempt me, Jay!”

Jared laughs. “No way! It’s too soon and I want to stick with only Brooke for now, thank you. Maybe in the far future!”

Jensen nods. “Fair enough.”

He sets the condom aside and picks up the lube, coating his fingers with it. Then he places one of Jared’s legs over his shoulder and starts opening him up, carefully with one finger first since Jared is very tight - hey, it’s been a while! - and then a second and a third. Jensen really takes his time to make sure Jared is very loose, so it will hurt less. Jared is almost dying with pleasure with Jensen’s fingers alone, and he hasn’t even seen his cock which is trapped inside his boxers. As Jensen cleans his fingers on his shirt, Jared palms his cock, causing Jensen’s breath to falter.

“Aren’t you gonna show me what you’re hiding in there?”

Jensen bites his bottom lip. “Why don’t you see it for yourself?”

Jared doesn’t need to be told twice, he uses both hands to lower Jensen’s boxers, and he kicks it the rest of the way down. Jared takes a look at Jensen’s naked glory and _oh man_. Jensen is not as big as Jared but that doesn’t matter in the slightest. Jared grabs the condom and opens the foil package, taking it out and wrapping it around Jensen’s length. He’s drooling just imagining it inside of him and he can’t wait. Jared then takes the lube and squeezes a large amount on Jensen’s dick, coating it with it.

“Come on, Jen. Do it.”

Jensen nods and places a cushion under Jared’s hips for leverage, then places his leg again over his shoulder, and positions himself with the head on Jared’s entrance. It feels like his heart will beat out of his chest with all the anticipation and desire. Jensen grabs Jared’s hip with a hand and begins to slowly push inside, breaching Jared’s tight entrance with his cock. Jared feels the pain, he shuts his eyes and bites his lips, holding his breath. Jensen stops the motion and frames his face, leaning down for a kiss.

“Relax, baby. You’re doing so good, you feel amazing around me. I’ve never felt this before, Jay. You’re my first, remember? It’s gonna feel amazing soon, I promise. Breathe with me, come on.”

Jared does as Jensen is telling him, looking at him in the eye and breathing along. Slowly his body relaxes a bit at the intrusion, and Jared nods. Jensen moves again, going deeper inside him, until he finally bottoms out. Jared grabs Jensen’s bicep as the pain hits again and Jensen waits. Finally it recedes and Jared gets used to it, so he nods. Jensen nods back and moves almost all the way out, then slams his cock back in, angling it so it hits Jared’s prostate. Pleasure floods through Jared’s body, eclipsing the pain completely. Jensen does it again and again as he caresses Jared’s nipples with his thumbs, and Jared’s brain almost short circuits. His own dick starts growing hard again, and Jensen wraps a hand around it, jacking it off at the same pace as his thrusts.

Jared tries to get out of his trance and mirrors Jensen’s earlier action, caressing his nipples and pinching them, making Jensen let out a loud moan and thrust harder inside him. Jared is sweating, grinding down to meet Jensen halfway and feel him even deeper, biting his lips so hard it almost draws blood, so he won’t scream Jensen’s name.

“Jay…” Jensen pants between thrusts, his eyes almost completely black, drops of sweat falling down his forehead. “You feel so amazing, I… Oh God. Never felt--oh God. I can’t, I’m gonna…”

Jensen leans down and captures Jared’s lip in a hard kiss, moaning loudly into his mouth as he comes inside him, and Jared knows this is so he won’t shout. Jensen pumps Jared’s dick a few more times as he comes, and Jared follows him shortly after. He doesn’t come as hard as the first time, but enough to coat Jensen’s hand with it. Jensen bites Jared’s bottom lip and thrusts into him one final time, finally collapsing on top of him.

They stay like this for a long time, both panting hard and recovering from it. Eventually Jensen holds onto the condom at the base of his dick and pulls out of Jared, who feels empty all of the sudden. Jensen unwillingly gets up from the bed to discard the condom and returns with a warm washcloth to clean them both. Once that’s taken care of, he throws the washcloth in the direction of the bathroom and lies down beside Jared, both on their sides facing each other. Jensen caresses Jared’s hair.

“Jay, that was amazing. Perfect. It never felt like this with anyone else. I thought sex was just sex, but tonight I realized it is much more.”

Jared smiles and plants a sweet kiss on Jensen's mouth. “It is, when both people love each other. It’s not just fucking around, it’s making love.”

Jensen returns the smile and he takes Jared’s hand, bringing it to his lips for a kiss. “Now I know the meaning of it. Thank you for showing it to me.”

Jared feels sleep dragging him, so he scoots closer to Jensen, who moves to lie on his back as Jared lies on his chest.

“It’s one more thing we are learning together and showing each other. That’s why we are so perfect together.”

Jensen wraps his arms around Jared and kisses the top of his head. “And why I love you so much.”

Jared wraps his arm tighter around Jensen’s chest. “And I love you so much back.”

*

Jared is on cloud nine after his first night with Jensen. It was beyond amazing, he has never felt this way with Justin or anyone else. It really felt like Jared and Jensen were just one, joined bodies and souls. They grow even closer after that, having reached a new level of intimacy, and Jared can see Jensen feels the same. It’s perfect.

Almost too perfect to be true.

*

A few days later, Jensen invites Jared to go to the agency with him, he needs to pick up some paperwork and sign some stuff, and would like for his workers to meet Brooke since he talks about her every time he goes there. Jared agrees, it has been a few days since he has left the house and it will do both of them good.

Once they arrive, everyone coos over Brooke who is in Jensen’s lap, and he’s in full pride papa mode, showing her left and right and telling everyone what a cute baby she is. Jared can’t help but chuckle. When they get to Jared’s secretary, she smiles at them but looks weird.

“Hey Soph, how is it going? Gonna show Brooke papa’s office, come on!”

Sophia gets up from behind her desk. “Jensen, I…”

Before Sophia can finish Jensen is already entering the office, Jared following right behind him. Jared is the first one to notice it because Jensen is looking at Brooke, and his heart stops. It takes Jensen a couple of seconds to catch up, and when he does his jaw drops.

“Jeff? What are you doing here?”

Jeff gets up from behind his desk and walks towards them, showing a bright smile. “Hello, Jared. Hey, Jensen. I’m back!” Jeff looks at Brooke in Jensen’s arms and then at Jared. “Oh, that’s your baby? She’s adorable.”

Jared feels a cold shiver running down his spine and takes a step closer to Jensen, who answers instead of Jared.

“That’s actually our baby, Jeff. I’m her other father, and Jared and I are together for real now.”

Jeff raises an eyebrow. “Oh, is that so? It’s wonderful. You make a great couple and from the bottom of my heart I wish you all the happiness.”

Jared swallows down and clears his throat, answering dryly. “Thank you.”

“Oh and since we are on the subject, I have a proposition for you, Jared.”

Jared’s eyes widen. “For me?”

Jeff smiles. “Yes. I was just reading about a campaign the agency is launching soon about breastfeeding, and we need some young mothers and fathers to do photoshoots with their babies. I think you would be perfect for it, you’re very handsome and I know you used to model when you were younger. What do you say?”

Jared’s heart starts pounding in his chest and he suddenly feels very nervous. There’s no way he could do something like that, and risk Justin seeing it and finding out about the baby. So he shakes his head.

“No Jeff. Thank you but no. I’m not interested in it at all.”

Jeff frowns. “Oh really? Because like I said, you would be perfect for it given your experience. Besides, we need some males who just had children, women are easier to find.”

Jared starts getting upset and he feels his face turning a shade of red. “Jeff, I said no! I’m not interested!”

“Why are you so nervous, Jared? What’s wrong with showing yourself and your baby off?”

Before Jared can answer, Jensen does. “Enough. Jared said he doesn’t want to do it, Jeff. Please respect his wishes. We are going now. I’ll come back some other time. I stand by what I said before you left, it’s better if I come to the agency when you’re not here. Goodbye.”

Jared leaves the room and Jensen follows. He doesn’t say a word as they leave the building and get to the car. Jared leaves Jensen to put Brooke in the car seat as he enters the car. Once Jensen joins him, he places a hand on Jared’s face.

“Baby, are you okay?”

Jared shakes his head, feeling tears pooling in his eyes. “No, I’m not. Jeff creeps me out, I’m afraid he might try something, I don’t think he has given up on you that easily. I felt some bad vibes coming from him as we were in the office, and the way he looked at you, and looked at Brooke and me… it gave me shivers.”

Jensen pulls Jared towards him for a sweet kiss. “It’s gonna be okay, Jay. I’ll protect you both, we are gonna be careful and nothing is gonna happen. We will be fine.”

Jared hopes Jensen is right.

*

A few days later, Jared is alone in the house with Chad and Brooke. Jensen is doing some work and Alan has taken Donna to an appointment. They’re in the living room playing with Brooke when the doorbell rings. Chad gets up to answer it and since he doesn’t come back after a few moments, Jared takes Brooke and goes to see who’s at the door.

“Chad, who is it?”

First, Jared sees Chad turning to look at him with a horrified look on his face. When Jared’s gaze lands on their visitor, his whole world comes crashing down and his heart stops, his eyes widen and his voice comes out in a terrified whisper.

“Justin?”

**TO BE CONTINUED...**


	17. Chapter 17

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hey guysssss thank you once again for reading! things got real NOW!! some of you hit jackpot in your guesses! good call! now we have a heavy episode with some important confrontations! Justin is back and as they say, honeymoon is over!
> 
> As usual, if you can pleeeease spare a moment to let me know what you think, you know I love hearing your thoughts and guesses and everything! 
> 
> Btw, after this one we have 3 more chapters to go only! I already miss this fic!
> 
> Oh and one more thing... since you guys are so good at guessing, who can hit jackpot on what will happen next? I gave a veeeeeryy subtle and little nudge on what *may* happen... who can guess?

_**Jared** _

Jared stays paralyzed in fear as he stares at Justin’s face, his worst nightmares coming true.

Justin’s eyes narrow as he looks at Jared and the baby in his arms. “Hello, Jared. Long time no see. Happy to see me?”

Jared forces his lips to move as he holds Brooke closer to his chest. “What--what are you doing here?”

“Well, I learned some interesting facts, including that you indeed had a baby. Came to see for myself. And it’s true after all.”

Suddenly Jared’s vision blurs, he feels dizzy and his knees threaten to buckle. “I can’t--I… please…”

Chad appears to realize Jared is about to faint so he grabs his bicep. “Jared, go back to the living room, sit on the couch. You look like you’re about to pass out and you have the baby. Go, I’ll take care of it.”

The only reason Jared doesn’t indeed pass out right there is the fact that he’s holding Brooke. So he forces his feet to move and gathers strength to walk the short distance to the living room, dropping on the couch and finally allowing the tears to fall free, and in seconds he’s sobbing, holding the baby close to his chest.

It’s over, Justin knows about Brooke. It’s all over.

Soon, Chad returns and sits by Jared’s side on the couch, placing a comforting hand on his shoulder. Jared looks at him and manages to speak through his sobs.

“He knows Chad, he’s gonna take Brooke from me, he will take my baby, he…”

“Jared, stop. He’s not taking your baby. You have the Ackles on your side, you have Jensen. It’s gonna be fine.”

Jared sniffs. “What--what did he say?”

“He said he wants to talk to you and you’re supposed to go meet him at the hotel he’s staying at soon. He also said you need to bring the baby because he wants to see her.”

Jared feels sick to his stomach, everything is crashing down and no matter what Chad says, Jared knows Justin will take his baby. He feels he’s about to vomit, so he hands Brooke to Chad and runs upstairs to his bathroom, losing all the contents in his stomach. Once he’s done, he stays in place, sitting by the toilet burying his face in his hands, fresh tears falling down his face. Eventually, Chad comes to his rescue.

“Come on Jare, let’s get you to bed. I put Brooke in her crib since she’s sleeping, and I called Jensen, he’s on his way. I’ll help you.”

Chad helps Jared up, and makes him brush his teeth and wash his face. Then he half carries Jared to the bed since he can’t support himself upright at the moment. He collapses on the bed and curls into a ball, hugging his knees close to his chest. He doesn’t even cry anymore, he feels completely numb with fear. He stares at the wall unmoving until Jensen comes barging into the bedroom, sitting down on the bed next to him.

“Jay, I’m here. Chad told me what happened.”

Hearing Jensen’s voice, new tears well up in Jared’s eyes and he sobs again. “He’s gonna take Brooke from me, Jensen. He knows we had a baby, it’s all over!”

Jensen frowns and shakes his head, pulling Jared up to a sitting position and into his arms. Jared goes and hugs Jensen close like his life depends on it, and cries harder. Jensen holds him and caresses his hair and back as he lets it all out, and Jared feels a tiny bit safer in Jensen’s arms. At least Jensen is here with him.

Jensen waits until Jared has calmed down, and hands him a glass of water that Chad has brought. Jensen smiles his thanks to his friend, who excuses himself to let them talk. Jensen makes Jared drink the water and carefully wipes the tears from his face. Jared sets the glass aside and stares at his lap for a few moments, gathering the courage to speak. It’s time to tell Jensen the whole truth, even if he wasn’t ready yet. Justin has taken this decision from his hands.

“I lied to you, Jen.”

Jensen frowns, clearly not understanding. “What do you mean, Jared?”

Jared finally looks up, staring at that beautiful face he loves so much. “Please don’t hate me. I just… just couldn’t tell you the truth at the time.”

Jensen purses his lips, looking lost. But he manages to give Jared a small smile. “Well, I think it’s clear now I could never hate you. Please Jay, whatever it is, you can tell me. I promise we will figure everything out together. Trust me.”

And Jared does, so much. He trusts Jensen with his life. So he tells everything that happened between Justin and him, from the very first time they met, how Jared fell for him, how he thought Justin was the love of his life.

“Justin told me he was broken, Jen. That he had no money like myself, and it was okay with me. I never cared about that, just wanted someone who loved me for real. I knew it would be okay as long as we were together. And I really thought he was the one.”

Jensen frowns again. “What happened to put an end to this fairytale?”

Jared shrugs. “I got pregnant. I was so scared Jen, I was only twenty-four, with no money and working at a diner, living in a tiny apartment. But Jen, from the moment I learned I was having a baby, despite everything, I was so happy. I loved Brooke from the first minute. I knew it would be rough but I was sure Justin would be thrilled with the news since we loved each other so much.”

“But he wasn’t,” Jensen guesses and Jared nods.

“I told you months ago that Justin had asked me to get an abortion when I told him, but that isn’t true, I lied because I was afraid to tell you what really happened. When I told him, he was so mad. I had never told him I was a carrier because I was afraid, that pushes some people away when they know. That’s why I hadn’t told him yet. He accused me of only going after his money, and I was lost. Then he told me he was actually rich, part of one of the most important families in Texas. He had told me he was poor only so he knew I was interested in him as a person and not after his money. He accused me of finding out who he was and creating a plan to get pregnant with his child so I could put my hands on his money.” Jared gives Jensen a pleading look. “Jen, I swear that isn’t true. I never knew, I really loved him. The pregnancy was really an accident!”

Jensen purses his lips and frames Jared’s face, his expression looking regretful. “I know Jay, I believe you. I’m sorry I accused you of all those things in the past. I’m so sorry.”

“I know, Jen. It’s okay now.” Jared takes a deep breath before continuing. “I even took another test at Planned Parenthood the next day to confirm it. I was so mad at Justin for lying to me, but I had already decided to have this child by myself. Then he cornered me and told me his family was willing to raise the baby and I would get financial compensation for it.” Jensen draws a sharp breath and Jared goes on. “I was scared shitless, they wanted to take my child away from me and _pay_ me for it, I couldn’t let that happen! So I had to think fast, I told Justin it had been a false alarm. That I took the test again and it was negative, I wasn’t pregnant. He tried to apologize but the damage was done, I told him I never wanted to see him again. I knew I had to disappear though, if I stayed in San Antonio he would eventually find out I was really pregnant. Chad and Brock helped me so much Jen, if it wasn’t for them I don’t even know what I would have done. They sheltered me in their place when I was devastated after everything came crashing down. I even…”

Jared looks away when he says this part, not being strong enough to face Jensen. “In the peak of my despair I thought it would be better if I just t--erminated the pregnancy. Brock, he… he was the one who talked me out of it, made me see it would be a huge mistake. That it was clear I loved this child already and it was my child anyway, Justin didn’t have or want anything to do with her. He really helped me, Jen. Both of them did. I knew I had to get away but didn’t know where to go since I didn’t have anybody. So your brother offered to bring me here since he was coming to Dallas to see your mom. He said maybe your dad could help me find a job at one of his agencies and I could stay at the boathouse while I tried to find some place to live permanently. Well, you know the rest. We had an accident, your brother died and you guys thought I was pregnant with his child. That’s my story with Justin, Jen. And now you finally know why I accepted this deal, what was in it for me. I needed protection from Justin, I always lived in fear he was gonna come and take my baby from me if he ever found out about her. You guys were the only option I had otherwise I probably would end up on the streets because I couldn’t return to San Antonio, that’s why I stayed despite being so hard at first. But now… now he’s here, he knows the truth and I’m terrified he’s gonna take Brooke from me, he can’t take my baby Jen, he can’t!”

Jensen pulls Jared to his chest as he starts crying again.

_ **Jensen** _

Jensen feels as if a knife is piercing its way through his heart. As Jared cries on his shoulder, he feels devastated at finally hearing Jared’s real story, tears running down his own face. And he also feels like the biggest jerk that has ever walked on the planet - well, only second to Justin, whom he feels pissed at.

Once Jared calms down Jensen pulls away so he can face his boyfriend, framing his face with both hands.

“Jay, listen to me. First of all, I’m so sorry for the way I treated you. I was no better than Justin, accusing you of being a freeloader. And now, knowing what you had just gone through, I feel like a big jerk. For that, I’m truly sorry. I poured salt on your wound and probably made things worse.”

Jared shrugs. “You didn’t know.”

“It’s not an excuse. Even though I can’t change the past, I can do something about the future. Now you listen to me, Jared. I won’t let Justin harm you or take Brooke away. For all accounts, she’s my daughter, my name is on the birth certificate.”

Jared sniffs. “He could ask for a DNA test.”

Jensen nods in agreement. “Yes, he can. But even if he can prove Brooke is his biological daughter, he won’t take her from you. You’re not alone anymore, Jay. You have me, you have our family. If his family is powerful, so is ours. If it comes to it, we will hire the best lawyers on the planet to make sure Brooke stays with you. I’m a hundred percent behind you on this, Jay. There’s absolutely no reason why a judge would take Brooke from you. You hear me? I got you in this.”

Jared nods, and Jensen can see him swallowing hard. “‘kay.”

“Now, what did Justin say? Did you talk to him?”

Jared shakes his head. “Barely. I felt sick and Chad did the talking. He told Chad he wants me to go meet him at some hotel so we can talk. And that I need to bring Brooke because he wants to see her.”

Jensen doesn’t like this. “Are you going?”

Jared nods. “If I don’t, he will find a way to talk to me, I know it. It’s better to get this over with.”

“Do you want me to come with you?”

“It’s better if I go alone. I think it would make things worse if you were there, I don’t know how Justin would react.”

Jensen likes this even less but he thinks Jared is right. “Fine. But I’ll drive you there and wait for you until you’re done. I don’t trust this guy.”

Jared nods. “Thank you, Jen. For everything, for becoming a father to Brooke, for having our backs. I don’t know what I would do without you.”

Jensen smiles and plants a kiss on Jared’s mouth. “I just love both of you so much, Jay. And I won’t let anything happen to any of you.”

Jensen pulls Jared for a hug, trying to assure him that things will be okay. There’s one thought nagging at the back of his brain though.

How did Justin find out about the baby and where Jared was?

*

The answer to that question doesn’t take long to come, in fact Jensen only has to wait until next morning.

They spent a restless night, Jared barely able to get any sleep, and Jensen just holding him and comforting him as much as he could. He still feels so pissed at Justin for lying to Jared like that, for accusing him of being after his money when Jared announced he was pregnant, and for making that proposition to him. Of course Jensen made a lot of mistakes with Jared as well, but at least he was not in a committed relationship with him. To Jensen, Justin is a huge jackass. There’s a tiny possibility he’s jealous of the man for the history he has with Jared. And he hates the idea of Jared going to talk to him, to see Justin again. Jensen knows it’s stupid but he is dreading that the encounter will bring up buried feelings. He just has to hold on to his trust in Jared.

In the morning Jensen needs to stop by the agency, and he agrees with Jared that they will go see Justin after lunch, get this over with. Jensen arrives at the agency and is signing some papers in his office when the door opens. He looks up only to find Jeff entering. Jensen sighs.

“What are you doing here? I thought you weren’t coming today.”

“We need to talk, Jensen.”

Jensen raises an eyebrow. “Oh really? Because last I checked, we had nothing else to talk about.”

Jeff walks towards him, stopping in front of his desk, arms crossed in front of his chest. “I came here to tell you who Jared really is.”

Jensen’s other eyebrow joins the first one. “Really?”

Jeff nods. “Yes. He has been lying to all of you, Jensen.”

Jensen gets up from his chair and places both hands on his waist, looking at Jeff through narrowed eyelids. “You don’t say? And what makes you think that Jared is lying to us all?”

Jeff plants both palms on the desk and leans forward to try and get full effect. “His child isn’t Brock’s. Jared and Brock were never boyfriends, it was actually Chad who was in a relationship with Brock. Jared had another boyfriend, some guy named Justin. He’s the father of Jared’s baby, Jared has been tricking you all because conveniently Brock died and you all assumed he was the father. He broke up with Justin for some reason and then saw the perfect opportunity to take advantage of your family and especially you. He’s a liar, Jensen, it all has been a lie.”

Jeff stares at Jensen with a raised eyebrow, waiting for his reaction. Jensen can’t help himself, he bursts out laughing. Jeff backs away and frowns.

“What?”

Jensen composes himself and shakes his head, an amused look on his face. “Do you really think I didn’t know all of this?”

Jeff falters at that, his expression blanking. “What? You--you knew?”

“From the very first day.”

“But… why did you keep up with this if you knew the truth?”

“Because of my mother. She was too fragile and held on to the hope of a grandchild after losing her son, we couldn’t tell her. But I always knew Brock was Chad’s boyfriend, and that Jared was pregnant with his ex-boyfriend’s child. So I’m sorry if your little plan didn’t work out. You’re so dirty you wanted to expose Jared to me so I would ditch him but your plan backfired. I always knew everything, that’s why I was so harsh with Jared at first. Because like you, I mistakenly assumed Jared was a freeloader but now I know better.”

Jensen stares at Jeff for a few moments and it finally dawns on him and he sees red. So he mirrors Jeff’s previous motion and leans forward, supporting his palms on the table.

“You were the one who found Justin and told him about the baby, and where to find Jared.” It’s not a question. Jensen knows it’s true.

Jeff’s face transforms and he gives Jensen a smug smile. “Imagine Justin’s surprise when I told him Jared had a baby and when he had that baby. He just did the math and knew it was his. Then I only had to give him an address.”

Jensen’s blood boils and he feels ready to do something stupid. He can’t think straight anymore as he hushes around the desk and grabs Jeff by the collar of his shirt, pushing him backwards until he hits the wall, and Jensen makes sure it’s extra hard.

“What the fuck is wrong with you?? Are you fucking insane?? Who gave you the right to go dig up Jared’s past like this and meddle in a business that isn’t yours?? Who gave you the right to tell Justin Jared’s secret and also tell him where to find Jared? Have you lost your goddamn mind??”

“Jared is full of shit! He managed to fool all of you and you fell for it straight in! He acts like he’s all innocent but I know his kind! He’s worthless, he’s playing you! He’s no good for you and I know it!”

Jensen scoffs. “Oh and you know so well what’s good for me right? Like you haven’t been playing me my whole life, shaping me up to be what _you_ wanted me to be! You are obsessed with me, you wanted to have control over me forever. But you didn’t want a serious commitment so you made sure I found some girl to marry, someone you knew I felt nothing for to keep up appearances, so we could still have an affair behind everyone’s back and I would be forever your puppet! But you weren’t counting on Jared showing up and me falling in love with him for real, and for him to expose all your bullshit to me! You hate Jared because he took me from you. And even more because he didn’t make any effort to do it. I went to him simply because I love him. And now that you lost, you want to fuck with Jared, but no matter what you do you won’t separate us, you hear me? In fact, the more you do to interfere in what we have, the more I loathe you!”

Jensen lets go of Jeff’s collar and steps back, pointing a finger at him. “I don’t want to see you again, Jeffrey. I don’t want you in my agency anymore. I don’t care if you're my partner in this, it was _my_ money, I didn’t even want this in the first place but you convinced me. I paid for all of this and I’ll buy your share, I don’t care how long it takes. I just want you _out_. I want nothing to do with you ever again! You crossed every possible line and I despise you!”

Jensen turns to leave but Jeff speaks, his voice full of venom. “You’re gonna regret this, Jensen! You’re gonna realize that Jared is taking advantage of you all and he’s not who you think he is. And when you do, it’s gonna be too late. I’ll be the first one to say that I told you so, because I’m the only one who really cares about you! Jared is scum and you’re gonna realize it! He’s fooling you with a pretty face and a baby you don’t even know if it’s really Justin’s or someone else who fucked him!”

Before Jensen can stop himself his fist is connecting with Jeff’s jaw, who falls on top of his desk. His knuckles hurt but Jensen doesn’t care, he’s too far gone. He points a finger to Jeff one more time as he screams at his face.

“You wash your mouth before you say his name! I want you out of here by the end of the day and I’ll make sure security knows you are not allowed in here again. I’m gonna talk to my lawyers to get you out of our society. I want nothing to do with you ever again. Goodbye, Jeffrey.”

Jensen rushes out and gets into his car, taking some time to calm himself down, he can’t drive like this and risk an accident. He can’t believe Jeff did this, that he sent Justin to Jared, spilling the whole truth to him. He must have hired a detective and gone to San Antonio to find everything out about Jared, just so he could expose him to Jensen. Jeff turned out to be someone completely different than Jensen assumed, he’s vile. He is obsessed with Jensen for some reason and the fact that he’s happy now with Jared enraged Jeff. Jensen is glad he doesn’t fall for Jeff’s tactics anymore. And he will do anything to buy Jeff’s share of the agency, maybe he will talk to his father and see what he can do. Jensen is gonna cut Jeff out of his life completely, no matter what.

*

Jensen goes back home and picks Jared up so they can go see Justin. He doesn’t tell him about his fight with Jeff and that he was the one who told the truth to Justin, he doesn’t want to add more to Jared’s stress. And he can see Jared is stressed enough, he doesn’t say a single word during the ride to the hotel, Jensen takes his hand and holds it the whole time. Jared squeezes it back, drawing comfort from the touch. Jensen just hopes everything goes well.

Once they arrive, Jensen takes the stroller out of the trunk as Jared gets Brooke from the carseat. He settles the baby in the stroller and pushes it inside the hotel, Jensen keeping a hand on his lower back. Jared goes to the main desk to announce his arrival, and once he’s told he can go up, he looks very nervous. Jensen frames his face with both hands.

“Jay, it’s gonna be okay. I’m gonna be down here the entire time, if Justin tries to do _anything_, you call me. I’ll be up there in no time. And if you’re not back in thirty minutes I’ll go check on you, got it?”

Jared only nods, his throat probably too tight to speak. Jensen pulls him into a chaste kiss.

“I love you.”

Jared swallows hard. “Love you too.”

Jensen kisses Brooke’s forehead and watches as Jared pushes the stroller to the elevator, and then gets inside, disappearing from sight. He hates not being able to be there to protect them. The next thirty minutes are going to be the longest in Jensen’s life.

_ **Jared** _

Jared feels like his heart is gonna burst out of his chest at any minute, he’s so nervous. And it’s not good nervous, he’s dreading the conversation he’s about to have with Justin. He’s not ready for it, he doesn’t think he ever will. Jared knows it won’t be a nice chat, and he wishes Jensen could go with him, but this is for the best. Once he arrives on the right floor, Jared pushes the stroller and stops in front of the right door. Before he can prepare himself a little longer, Justin opens the door and they face each other for the first time.

“Jared.” Justin looks at him and down at the baby.

“Hello, Justin.”

He opens the door wider so Jared can get inside, and he tries to calm himself down, he doesn’t want for Justin to notice how nervous he is.

Justin approaches the stroller where Brooke is fast asleep. He looks at her tenderly for some long moments, and then looks at Jared, his expression morphing into anger.

“Are you gonna deny she’s my daughter?”

Jared lifts his chin, facing Justin. He shakes his head. “No, I won’t.”

Justin lifts an eyebrow. “Good, because that would be easy to prove with a DNA test. I want to know why you lied to me Jared. Why the fuck did you tell me you had a false alarm when you were pregnant all along?”

Jared feels his eyes welling up but he keeps his face firm. “Because you said you were gonna take my child from me, that’s why! I was afraid of you, of your family Justin! You made it pretty clear you wanted me to give you my baby so your family could raise her, that you and your father decided it would be the best thing for her! And that I would be ‘financially compensated’ for it! You wanted me to_ sell _my baby to you! And of course you doubted you were really the father, you wanted to take a fucking DNA test!”

Justin shakes his head. “We could have talked more about that, Jared! Everything was too shocking, you shouldn’t have run away like you did! I had no idea where you were!”

“I didn’t want you to! And how could we have talked more about that when you made pretty clear you wanted my baby? I was scared Justin, I didn’t want to risk losing my baby. You and your family are powerful, you have money and I didn’t have anything, I’m a nobody! What chance did I have? That’s why I escaped, why I lied to you about being a false alarm. I couldn’t lose my baby, you need to understand that!”

A few tears fall down Jared’s face and he wipes angrily at them. Justin runs a hand over his face. “And you think lying to me was okay?”

“You lied to me first! You lied during the whole time we were together, you made me believe you were someone you were not! And then I got pregnant, I was scared but I knew we would be able to handle it as long as we were together. But then you showed your true colors and accused me of only being after your money. After all of this, how can you think you’re in any position to judge me?”

Justin sighs, staring at Brooke for a few moments as he collects his thoughts.

“And now you’re lying to the Ackles that this baby is Brock’s child. Why are you doing this Jared?”

Jared doesn’t ask how Justin knows that, it doesn’t matter right now. But he briefly tells him the whole story, about Brock’s death and the misunderstanding. When he’s done, Justin narrows his eyes.

“Oh and you decided to help a woman you didn’t even know just out of the goodness of your heart? Am I supposed to believe that?”

“I didn’t know her but I knew Brock! He was my friend who helped me when you did all of that to me, who offered me a place to stay and a job here, and I chose to help his mother because she was receiving treatment for cancer! At first I didn’t want to, but Mr. Ackles begged me to do it because it was the only thing Donna was holding onto, she had just lost her son! And also… I did it because I was afraid of you. I had nobody else and couldn’t return to San Antonio, and they offered me shelter and protection. I know I shouldn’t have agreed to this lie but I had no other choice. I was afraid of your family! I don’t give a shit if you believe me or not, this is the truth.”

Justin studies Jared for a few moments. “You had no idea what I went through because of you Jared, when you disappeared like that. I thought about you first thing in the morning and last thing after closing my eyes at night, everyday!”

Jared scoffs. “Yeah, I can imagine how much you had to endure being in Paris. You speak like you’re the only one who suffered.”

Justin lifts an eyebrow. “Oh yeah, I can see how much you suffered. You jumped in Jensen Ackles’ arms at the first opportunity you got. Lemme guess, you saw in him an opportunity to be settled for life, is that it?”

Jared stares at Justin incredulously and slowly shakes his head. “After all this time you’re still accusing me of being a freeloader. Some things won’t ever change, huh?”

Justin looks down but doesn’t answer. The silence is broken by Brooke making noises announcing she’s awake. Before Jared can do anything, Justin goes to her and carefully picks her up. Jared tries to restrain himself not to go and grab her from his arms. Justin stares at the baby in his hands and at Jared.

“What’s her name?”

“Brooke. For Brock.”

Justin nods. “And her full name?”

Jared knows where Justin is getting at, and he lifts an eyebrow. “Brooke Anne Ackles-Padalecki.”

Justin purses his lips. “He registered her as his daughter?”

Jared nods. “Yes, he did. Jensen is the only father, after myself, she ever knew. He has been with me throughout almost the whole pregnancy, and from the first minute Brooke was born. She may not have his blood, but Jensen is her father.”

Justin looks at Jared through narrowed eyelids. “I want my rights as her father. I’m her biological father and I want for that to be official, I don’t want him in her birth certificate. And I am not afraid of going to court to make that happen.”

Jared closes the distance and takes Brooke from Justin’s arms, placing her on his shoulder. “Don’t take my baby from me, Justin please.” He knows he sounds pathetic but all of his old fears are resurfacing.

Jstin shakes his head. “I don’t want to take Brooke from you. I just want to be a part of her life, that’s all. She’s my daughter too. And you’re gonna tell the whole truth to Donna Ackles.”

Jared nods. “I know, I should have told her already but it’s complicated, Justin. She’s gonna be devastated when she learns her son passed away and left her nothing.”

Justin raises a finger at him. “I’ll give you one week, Jared. One week for you to tell her otherwise I’ll tell her myself.”

Jared nods slowly. “I’ll fix it. Don’t worry.”

Jared settles Brooke down in the stroller again, but before he can get out of the room, Justin speaks.

“This Jensen guy… Do you love him?”

Justin suddenly looks broken, but Jared finds out more than ever that he feels nothing for him anymore. His feelings for Jensen eclipsed everything he once felt for the man in front of him.

“Jensen has been by my side through all the hardest moments. He has become everything I need. He’s kind, he’s caring, he’s…”

“I asked if you love him.”

Jared smiles at Justin. “I love Jensen. More than I have ever loved anyone. I have never felt for anybody else what I feel for him.”

Justin lifts an eyebrow. “Not even for me?”

Jared shakes his head. “Not even close.”

Jared takes a step towards the door, but Justin stops him again.

“Wait.”

Jared turns around and sees Justin picking something up from the nightstand. It’s a black velvet box. Jared frowns. Justin opens it and shows it to Jared.

“The day you said you were pregnant, I was going… I was going to ask you to marry me. I had bought you a ring.”

When Jared inspects the ring closer, he notices it’s the one he had seen at _Jared _with Justin a lifetime ago, and that Justin promised he would buy for Jared one day. Seeing the ring now only brings a sour taste to Jared’s mouth. He looks at Justin and shakes his head.

“You know… I never cared that you were poor, I never wanted any money. It didn’t matter that you couldn’t afford a ring like that. I would have taken a ring made out of straw if it meant you loved me and that we would spend our life together, raising our baby in a family filled with love. You didn’t have to lie to me, I would have even signed a prenup to show you I didn’t want a cent of your money. I just wanted_ you_. But you destroyed all of this Justin. You got it all wrong. And I found everything I need in Jensen.”

Jared pushes the stroller and opens the door, turning to Justin one last time.

“Don’t worry. I’ll fix everything.”

*

The elevator can’t go down fast enough. Jared fidgets the whole ride and finally the door opens, he rushes out pushing the stroller and looks around, frantically looking for a familiar face. He finally finds it, Jensen getting up from an armchair and walking toward him. It feels so amazing to see Jensen’s face, Jared rushes to close the distance and pull Jensen to a tight hug.

He instantly feels better, he feels safe. God, how much he loves Jensen.

They hug in silence for a long moment, and when they break apart Jensen smiles at him, trying to relieve the tension.

“So I’m assuming you’re not ditching me to go back to Justin, huh?”

Jared shakes his head, tears welling up in his eyes. “Never, in a million years. If anything, I’m even more sure about how much I love you if that was even possible.”

Jensen smiles wider and takes Jared to a corner so they can talk more privately, then he turns serious.

“How did it go, Jay?”

Jared shrugs, looking down. “He was mad. He gave us a week to tell Donna the truth. And…” Jared’s heart feels tighter just saying it. “He wants to become Brooke’s legal father.”

Jensen frowns. “Does he want to battle for her custody?”

Jared shakes his head. “No, he said he doesn’t want to take her from me. He just wants to be her other father. But I don’t want that Jen, I want you to be her father.”

Jensen purses his lips and pulls Jared closer. “I don’t want that either, Jay. It’s gonna be okay, let’s have hope.”

*

Jensen takes Jared out for a late lunch once they leave the hotel, since neither have eaten anything yet. Jared tries to eat at least some of his food, he’s too nervous thinking about what’s to come. Jensen of course picks up on it, and reaches out to touch his forearm. He only gives Jared a look, not needing to say anything.

Jared purses his lips as he looks at Brooke in the stroller next to them. “We are gonna have to tell Donna. I know we should have done that a long time ago, but now we really have to, there’s no other choice. I’m scared Jen, she’s gonna hate me.”

Jared tears up again and Jensen reaches out to wipe a tear away. “She won’t hate you, Jay. She may not understand at first, it may take some time, but I know she will come around eventually. She will understand why we did it. I know it.”

Jared nods, trying to calm his heart a bit. He knows there’s a storm coming, he can feel it.

*

In the evening, after Donna goes upstairs to her room, Jared, Jensen, Alan and Chad talk in the living room. They tell Alan everything that has happened, and the deadline Justin gave them. Alan has been more open to Jared lately, especially after Brooke was born. Jared can tell how attached Alan feels to the baby already, surprising even Jared himself. Maybe he was able to see that they were doing nothing wrong and stopped giving them such a hard time.

Alan looks worried once they finish. “Well, I think it’s time we tell Donna, then. It’s such a small world, I’ve met Mark Hartley a few times throughout the years. They are indeed a powerful family in San Antonio.” Alan looks at Jared and notices how stressed he is. “But don’t worry Jared, I promised I would protect you and your child, didn’t I? If they try anything, we’ve got your back.” Jared nods as Jensen squeezes his hand, feeling deeply grateful. “Now we need to focus on telling Donna. The sooner the better, I know it’s gonna be a shock for her and it won’t be easy, but this is way overdue.”

Jensen nods. “I agree. What about we tell her tomorrow after dinner? That will give us some time to prepare.”

They all agree to it, tomorrow at dinner they will all gather to tell Donna the truth.

Jared barely sleeps that night, and Jensen once again offers him all the comfort he can.

*

In the morning, Donna arranges to have breakfast served by the pool since it’s a beautiful day. Jared arrives with Jensen, who is carrying Brooke. Jared feels nervous just seeing Donna, but he tries to calm his nerves. Just as Alan arrives, Loretta comes to the backyard bringing a man Jared doesn’t know, but looks familiar somehow.

“Mr. Ackles, you have a visitor.”

Jared looks at Alan, whose eyes widen. “Mark? What are you doing here?”

Jared freezes on the spot. Mark? It couldn’t be as in _Mark Hartley_ could it?

The man smiles tightly at Alan. “Hello, Alan. I came here to meet my granddaughter.”

Jared feels as if the ground is opening below him and he can’t move. He feels Jensen coming closer and squeezing his hand.

Donna gets up and stares at the man. “What are you talking about? Which granddaughter?”

Mark points at Brooke in Jensen’s arms. “That one.”

Donna shakes her head, frowning. “What is going on? This is my grandchild, she’s the daughter of Jared and my late son Brock.”

Mark tsks. “No, she isn’t. She’s the daughter of Jared and _my _son, Justin.”

Alan takes a step forward. “Mark, don’t.”

But Mark shakes his head. “No, it’s time Mrs. Ackles learns the truth.”

“There’s no truth!” Donna speaks louder. “Jared was Brock’s boyfriend and they had a child, that’s_ it_.”

Mark remains impassive. “No, they were never boyfriends. Jared used to date my son Justin and learned he was pregnant. This is the truth. Now we want our rights as the family of this child.”

Donna looks from Mark to Jared, a shocked look on her face. “This… this is not true, right? Jared, tell him what he’s saying is complete insanity!”

Jared can’t find his voice. He wishes he could tell Donna that no, it’s not true, that man is lying. But he can’t. Jensen squeezes his hand even tighter, and tears well up in Jared’s eyes. Donna makes a horrified face, and Jared hates himself. From far away Jared can hear Alan asking Mark to leave so they all can talk, and Mark saying he will be back to discuss the matter more thoroughly.

Donna stays focused on Jared, her voice coming out as almost a whisper. “Jared? He’s lying right?”

Jared purses his lips and shakes his head, tears falling down his face. He clears his throat and forces the words through the lump in there. “It’s all true.”

Donna puts a hand on her chest and takes a few steps back, shaking her head vigorously. “No! It’s impossible, just no!”

Jared takes a few deep breaths and steps forward, Jensen glued to his side and holding Brooke close to his chest.

“I’m so sorry Donna. We were gonna tell you tonight, it was long overdue. But yes, Mr. Hartley is right. I was never Brock’s boyfriend, I was Justin’s. He’s the real father of my baby.” Jared’s gaze travels to Chad, who’s standing next to them looking apprehensive. “Chad was Brock’s real boyfriend. They loved each other very much.”

Donna frowns, looking from Jared to Chad then back at him. “But… but why did you lie to me? Why did you all make me believe you were pregnant with my grandchild when it was not true? What’s wrong with you people?”

This time, Alan answers. “Sweetheart, I asked Jared to lie. Actually we had assumed he was Brock’s boyfriend at first, and when I learned the truth, I asked him, begged him not to tell you. You were very fragile, going through that hard treatment, and the idea of Brock leaving a child behind was able to lift your spirits. I asked Jared to hide the truth so you had a reason to go on.”

Donna’s eyes tear up and she looks even more shocked. “So you’re saying that my son is gone and left me with absolutely nothing of his?”

Jared takes a step forward and tentatively reaches out to take Donna’s hand in his. “Donna, I’m so sorry, I truly am. I did try to tell you the truth a few times but couldn’t. Remember back in the hospital when I said I had something to tell you and you suddenly felt unwell? I couldn’t do that to you, I didn’t know what was gonna happen if you learned the truth. And then… you became a mother to me. You took me in and took care of me when I needed the most. It tore me apart to hide this from you all this time. But I want you to know I care deeply about you and I wish with all my heart you can understand and forgive me for this. Forgive us. And Brooke…” Jared looks at the baby in Jensen’s arms and back at Donna. “She may not have the same blood as yours, but she’s still your granddaughter in your heart. She always will be.”

Jensen takes a step closer as well. “Mom, Brooke may not be Brock’s daughter, but she’s mine. I _chose_ to be her father. You can do that too, she will be your grandchild all the same. Just from your other son.”

Donna stares at all of them for a long time, silence hanging heavily in the air. Jared holds his breath in anticipation, praying for her to understand. But suddenly her expression morphs into anger and she yanks her hand from Jared’s grasp.

“You’re all liars! You monsters, how dare you all lie to me like this? You all knew and I was the only one being played like a fool?” She looks at Jared and Chad. “I welcomed you both in my house, treated you like my own sons, only to find out you were lying to my face? Oh my God I feel so stupid! It was all lies and I don’t want to see your faces again!”

With that, Donna rushes inside, and Jared allows the tears to fall freely, desperation taking over him. It’s all over, Donna knows the truth and she won’t forgive them. Jensen wraps an arm around Jared and pulls him closer, kissing his temple.

“It will be okay Jay. She will come around, you will see.”

Jared shakes his head, eyes closed shut. “No--she won’t. She was so… angry. She hates me.”

This time Alan speaks. “No Jared, she doesn’t. Jensen is right, she will understand eventually, I’m sure she just needs some time to think, to assimilate everything. This is all a big shock to her. And I’m sorry I asked you to lie to her in the first place.”

Jared opens his eyes and shakes his head, taking a few deep breaths. “I know what we did was bad, but I don’t regret it. And I hope she does come around eventually. But I don’t think I can stay here for now, she made it pretty clear she doesn’t want to see us.”

Jensen nods. “Yeah, I guess you’re right. We should go stay in my apartment for now, until it all settles down and mom can forgive us, hopefully. It’s gonna be okay.”

Chad speaks for the first time. “I think I should probably find a place to stay too. I was included in the lie as well and I’m pretty sure Donna wants nothing to do with me.”

Chad’s eyes are wet and Jared also feels for his friend. He knows how attached Chad and Donna grew, he had also become another son to her and this is probably killing him as well.

Jensen speaks up. “You can come with us, Chad. There’s enough space at my place. At least for now until we wait for things to work out. It’s probably better that we stay together.”

Jared gives Jensen a small smile, silently thanking his boyfriend for being so considerate. Chad looks at Jared, who nods, then back at Jensen.

“Yeah, okay. Thank you Jensen. Really appreciate it.”

Jensen nods shortly at him and they all get to business, getting back inside the house to pack their stuff. The door to the master bedroom is closed, and neither of them dare to go bother Donna. Once they are all ready to go, they all say goodbye to Alan. He asks to hold Brooke for a moment, and Jared can tell it’s hard for him to say goodbye to her. He secretly hopes they can come back anytime soon.

Jensen squeezes Alan’s shoulder. “Dad, please come by anytime alright? You know you’re very welcome in my place.”

Alan nods. “Thanks son. I promise I’ll try to talk to your mother. It will take some time but she will come around. I know it.”

Alan hands Brooke to Jared and says goodbye to the three of them. It breaks Jared’s heart to be leaving this house where so much good has happened. But he looks to his left in the car and sees Jensen, and he knows it’s gonna be okay.

As long as Jensen is with him and Brooke, they will be okay.

**TO BE CONTINUED...**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> PS: Go Jensen!


	18. Chapter 18

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey guyssss sorry for not posting last week! Due to some technical difficulties, we don't have an art this week, but hopefully we will soon! I didn't want to wait longer to post this chapter tho!
> 
> Now things get REALLY serious. We only have three more chapters to get to the end of this story, and of course we couldn't end this easily! I wonder if anyone guessed right what was gonna happen! 
> 
> Please if you can, spare some time to let me know what you think! And I hope you love my cliffhangers!

_ **Jared** _

They all get to Jensen’s apartment, Jensen puts Chad in the spare bedroom and Jared and Brooke in his own bedroom, of course. Jared is glad Jensen splurged when they went shopping for the layette and he got a portable folding crib they can put Brooke in. They are all very quiet as they get settled, but Jared is getting very pissed about something and he needs to act on it. So after feeding Brooke, he asks Jensen to watch her for a while because he’s going to see Justin, he has some stuff to discuss with him. Jensen asks if Jared wants him to come along, but Jared tells him it’s not necessary. It won’t take long.

So Jared takes a cab to Justin’s hotel, hoping he’s there. The receptionist lets Jared know he can go up. When he arrives at Justin’s floor, he’s already at the door.

“Jared, what a surprise.”

Jared walks past him inside the room and turns around to face him, arms crossed in front of him. “I want to know why the fuck your father went to the Ackles’ residence to tell the whole truth to Donna?”

Justin frowns, looking taken aback. “He did _what_?”

Jared scoffs. “Justin please. Just this morning your father pretty much invaded the house and spilled the truth in Donna’s face without any warning! You promised to give me a week Justin, fuck! We were gonna tell her tonight, try and prepare her for it, and it’s all ruined! She hates me, we had to leave the house! What’s your fucking problem?”

Justin stares at Jared with wide eyes for a few moments, then clasps his hands in front of him, giving him a pleading look. “Jared, please I swear I don’t have anything to do with it. I hadn’t even told my dad yet, he actually called me last night asking if it was true, I don’t even know how he found out! I just confirmed it and said we had agreed on you telling Donna about it. I didn’t even know he went to your house until right now. I swear to God I didn’t know Jared, I was going to wait a week just like I told you, I promise! I’m so sorry my father did that!”

Jared sighs. “Yeah, so am I. It was a very fucked up thing to do, and everything has fallen apart.” Jared presses the heels of his hands on his eyes, suddenly feeling exhausted. “God, what a mess everything has become. I feel like I can never get a fucking break.”

“Oh yeah, at least you didn’t just find out you have a daughter and your ex lied to you this whole time.”

Jared can’t help rolling his eyes. “Seriously? You want to start this again? I’ve told you my reasons Justin, I’ve made mistakes but so did you, okay? You’re no saint here!”

Justin holds up both hands in front of him in a surrender gesture. “Okay, okay. I won’t start it.” He suddenly looks defeated. “I wish things weren’t like this. I could have been with you through the pregnancy and Brooke’s birth.”

Jared shrugs. “Yeah, but you weren’t. And I refuse to take full blame for it.”

“I won’t put it all on you, don’t worry. I just… I missed you, that’s all.”

It’s funny how those words don’t have any effect on Jared, when at one point they were everything he needed to hear. He doesn’t answer, just stares at Justin with pursed lips.

“Okay, well…” Justin starts, letting out a breath. “I want to see Brooke. She’s my daughter and I want to start spending some time with her and you can’t deny me that.”

Jared shakes his head. “I never said I would.”

“Good. Can I stop by at your place soon to see her?”

Jared nods. “Yes you can. By the way, I had to leave the Ackles’ house because Donna didn’t want me there anymore. I’m staying at Jensen’s apartment with him.”

Jared emphasises Jensen is with him in the apartment on purpose, he wants for Justin to understand they are a unit now.

Justin nods. “Yeah, okay. I can give you my number so you can text me the address and that way I can have your number saved too.”

Jared agrees and they exchange numbers, Jared does as Justin asked and texts him the address to the apartment. Justin promises he will come by soon to see Brooke, and Jared leaves with a quick goodbye. He is eager to go back to Brooke and Jensen.

*

“What I don’t understand is how Justin and his father found out about all of this,” Jared tells Jensen once he returns to the apartment. He checks the crib where Brooke is sleeping before continuing. “I mean, Justin said his father learned about it somehow and decided to visit us, that Justin didn’t tell him. I don’t know if I believe him but he sounded sincere. And I still don’t know how Justin himself found me.”

Jared stares at Jensen, who takes a deep breath and purses his lips.

“Jay, I need to tell you something.”

Jared frowns, Jensen looks deadly serious. “Jen, what’s going on?”

“It was Jeff. He was the one who learned all about Justin, who contacted him and told him about you and Brooke. Who told him where to find you. He was probably the one who went after Mark Hartley to tell him about it as well.”

Jared’s jaw drops and his heart stops. _Jeff_? Jared shakes his head, it can’t be. “It was him? But why? Why would he do this?”

“For revenge, of course. He thinks you stole me from him, and he couldn’t have that.” Suddenly Jensen’s eyes well up. “I’m so sorry, Jay.”

Jared frowns again. “Why?”

“Because this is all my fault! Justin found you because Jeff was jealous and wanted to hurt you. I’m so sorry I put you in all of this trouble.”

Jared’s expression softens and he takes Jensen’s hand. “Jen, come on. It’s not your fault Jeff is insane. You were under his spell and now you know who he really is, and there was no way to know he would do this. I just wish he wasn’t so low to go and do something like this. Ugh, I am not a violent person but I wish I could punch him.”

Jensen gives him a guilty smile. “I already kinda did.”

Jared’s eyes widen in shock. “You _what_?”

Jensen sighs and tells Jared about how Jeff went after him in the agency to spill the beans about Jared, and how Jensen connected the dots, how he was so furious about Jeff doing something so despicable that he couldn’t stop himself.

“I’m also not violent Jay, I swear but I was so disgusted and mad at what he did I just wanted to split his face in two.”

Jared smiles despite everything. “Well, I know violence isn’t the answer but I’m not sorry you took care of him. It’s sad how some people can’t stand other’s happiness. Do you think he could try something else?”

“I hope not. We should be careful but I think he knows the damage he caused was already big enough. He managed to hit us where it would hurt the most. But we will be okay. No matter what happens, we are gonna stick with each other and he won’t be able to break us apart. Right?”

Jared nods, so incredibly relieved to have Jensen by his side, knowing he’s not alone. He just prays everything will end up okay.

*

A couple of days later, Justin visits Brooke for the first time as he had asked Jared to do. He had called and asked to come, and Jared said it was okay. Jensen purposefully waits a little longer to leave to work so he’s in the apartment when Justin arrives, and Jared is grateful. He feels nervous when the doorbell rings and he opens the door, Brooke in his arms.

“Hey Justin.”

Justin gives him a small smile. “Hey Jared. Thanks for having me.”

“Yeah, sure.”

Jared steps aside so Justin can get inside, and closes the door behind him. At this moment Jensen comes out of the bedroom and gives Justin a pointed look. Jared makes a motion with his hand.

“Justin this is Jensen, my boyfriend. Jen, this is Justin.”

Jensen takes a step forward, offering Justin his hand, who shakes it.

“Nice to meet you.”

“Likewise.”

Jared can feel the tension between them both, he knows Jensen doesn’t like Justin on principle for what happened between him and Jared. Thankfully Jensen doesn’t let the moment last too long as he turns to Jared with a fond smile.

“Well Jay, I’ll be going since I’m already running late. You take care, okay?” Jared nods and Jensen plants a chaste but lasting kiss to his lips, probably taking the opportunity to show off to Justin and Jared is fine with that. Then he leans down to kiss Brooke’s forehead. “Bye, baby girl. Love you.”

With that Jensen leaves, sparing Justin a short nod. He stays frozen in place for a few moments, as if having no clue what to do. Jared takes pity on him.

“Well, you’re here to see Brooke, right? You want to hold her?”

Justin comes off his trance and nods, holding up his arms. Jared hands him the baby, careful so they have minimal contact.

“Well, if you wish to spend some time alone with her, you can go to the spare room. I’ll be here checking some stuff on the computer.”

Justin does that and for a while Jared can hear him talking to Brooke from time to time. Even though Jared hates this situation, he doesn’t want to keep father and daughter apart, it’s not fair even though they have their problems. He hopes they find a way to solve this situation and that it’s good for everyone involved.

Eventually Justin returns with Brooke, a small smile on his face. “She’s so perfect, Jared.”

Jared smiles fondly, looking at his baby girl. “Yeah she is. She’s my little miracle, she survived the crash that killed Brock and she was only a little peanut back then.”

Justin turns serious. “That must have been awful. It’s so sad that Brock is gone, he was a great guy.” Jared only nods, not wishing to talk about his late friend since it still hurts. “What about Chad? How is he doing after all of this?”

Jared purses his lips. “He’s doing better now. It was very hard for him to lose Brock. But recently he started dating a good guy, and he’s healing. We are all getting much better now.”

Justin nods, biting his bottom lip. “Yeah, I can see that. You and Jensen… you’re really together right?”

“Oh yes. Jensen has helped me a lot after a rough start, and we grew very close. I’m very lucky to have him.”

Justin stares at Jared for a few moments, as if lost in thoughts, and then finally speaks again. “Is there a chance you could still love me?”

The question takes Jared by surprise, and he takes a step back. “What?”

“Jared, ever since I saw you again, I can’t stop thinking about you. Well, I could never stop thinking about you this whole time, but seeing you again… it’s been driving me insane Jared. I love you so much, I’m crazy about you. I know what we had was real, I know you loved me. I know with time you could love me back, I know it!”

Jared frowns. “What the fuck are you saying Justin?”

Justin looks at him with pleading eyes. “I want to have you back, Jared. I know we are great together, we are perfect for each other. We even have a beautiful baby now! I know you and that Jensen grew closer but that’s nothing compared to what we feel for each other! Please Jared, come back to me. Forget about him, let’s be together again!”

Jared shakes his head, not believing what he’s hearing. “You can’t be serious, Justin. I’m sorry, but we are over, we have been for a long time now. Our relationship even started wrong when you lied to me about who you were. I could never trust you again.”

“But Jared, I can change, I…”

“That’s not even the point Justin. I don’t love you anymore, I don’t think I’ve ever loved you for real. What we had was great and it gave me a beautiful present. I’ll be forever grateful to you for my baby girl. But we are done. I love Jensen so much, and I want nobody else. I’ll never want anybody else but him. I need you to understand that.”

Justin’s eyes well up with tears. “But Jared, please…”

Jared steps forward and takes Brooke from Justin’s arms, she is starting to get fussy. “Justin, this is not up for discussion. I’m with Jensen now and I need you to respect that for this to work. I won’t stop you from seeing Brooke, but she’s the only thing connecting us, nothing else. I think you should go now. She is getting hungry and I need to feed her. You can come back some other time.”

Justin stares at Jared for a few moments and then finally nods, defeated. “Fine. I’m sorry for that. Can I come back in a few days? I’m actually looking for an apartment in the city since I want to spend more time here to be closer to Brooke.”

Jared nods, telling himself he can’t keep a father away from his daughter. “Sure thing. Just call me before you come.”

Justin comes closer to say goodbye to Brooke, caressing her tiny head. “Bye, baby.”

He gives Jared a last long look before leaving. Jared sits down on the couch and starts feeding Brooke, trying not to think about what Justin just said. Jared realizes his words didn’t have any effect on him, he feels absolutely nothing for Justin anymore and that’s a relief.

Later when Jensen arrives Jared shares with him everything that happened, he doesn’t want to hide anything from Jensen. He makes sure Jensen understands Jared doesn’t care at all with what Justin said, he loves Jensen and Jensen alone.

Jensen gives him a huge smile and a long kiss. “That’s right, it was his loss. He wasn’t good enough to keep you close, and he now has to watch you being happy with me. I get it, though. It must be devastating losing you. Thankfully I’ll never know the feeling because I won’t be dumb enough to let you go and we will be happily ever after.”

Jared smiles back at him, caressing his face and feeling all warm inside. “That’s all I ask.”

*

A few days later, Donna still hasn’t come around and Jared is still living in the apartment with Jensen and Chad. Alan has visited, telling them that Donna is still very upset, she isn’t even talking to Alan at the moment who has been sleeping in Jensen’s room. But Alan is still hopeful that Donna will come around eventually, that everything is too fresh and things will be okay. He also points out that she was already very attached to Brooke and won’t be able to stay away from her for long.

Justin calls the day after and asks Jared if they can go with Brooke to spend the day out in the park, he doesn’t want to be cooped up in the apartment. Jared really doesn’t want to go, he’s still wary of Justin ever since he asked Jared to come back to him. But he also doesn’t want to stop him from seeing Brooke and there’s no way in hell Jared is allowing Justin to take Brooke anywhere without him being there too. So he reluctantly agrees.

Jensen leaves before Justin arrives, Jared having told him the plan for the day. Jensen wasn’t happy at all with the idea of Jared going with Justin and Brooke to the park, but he understood there weren’t many options and he also didn’t want Justin taking Brooke alone. Jared gives Jensen a last hug and long kiss before he leaves for work, and he feels a strange apprehension in his heart but dismisses it.

Soon Justin arrives and he looks kind of weird, but Jared can’t put his finger on it. He licks his lips and asks if Jared is ready to go. Jared goes to his bedroom to get Brooke, who had been sleeping, and the diaper bag. He puts his phone in the front pocket of the bag and lets Justin know they’re ready. Justin offers to carry the diaper bag for him, since Jared is already carrying Brooke. Jared feels odd during the elevator ride, as if something is bothering him but he can’t tell what. He only holds Brooke closer to his body and prays for this day to end.

Justin leads Jared to his car and opens the back door, showing the car seat he got for Brooke. It’s similar to the one in Jensen’s car, so Jared quickly places Brooke in it and buckles her up while Justin puts the diaper bag on the floor. Jared gives her a kiss on the forehead as he always does and takes his place in the front seat, his heart beating faster than usual. Justin sits in the driver’s seat and turns to Jared with a half-smile on his face.

“Ready?”

Jared just nods, swallowing hard.

Justin turns the engine on. “Let’s go, then.”

_ **Jensen** _

Jensen is on his way home much earlier than he was supposed to. Something is wrong. Jensen hated the idea of Jared going to the park with Justin from the beginning, he had a bad feeling about it but he tried to brush it off, he was only being jealous. Justin is obviously a gorgeous guy, and he has a history with Jared. Of course Jensen is deep down afraid they may get close again and Jared will realize he really loves Justin, always has, and that Jensen was only a distraction. He knows Jared has said a million times he has never felt for Justin what he feels for Jensen but try and tell his brain that. Jensen didn’t want Jared spending time with Justin but he also wouldn’t allow for the man to take his daughter anywhere without one of them being there. And he knows that not allowing Justin to see Brooke may be worse so it’s an awful situation no matter what. Jensen tried to suck it up and trust Jared, it would only be for a few hours.

But now it has been hours since Jensen left the apartment and Jared won’t answer his phone. There’s no reason for Jared to turn his phone off even if he went to the park with Justin, he knows Jensen would call eventually to check on the situation. Jensen has called a few times and nothing, so he started getting worried. Perhaps Jared let his phone die or something, so he hurries back to the apartment to see if by some miracle him and Brooke are back already.

When Jensen arrives, the apartment is empty.

He tries calling again and again and nothing, and Jensen is almost panicking by now. Something is definitely not right. What if…

Jensen hears the door opening and he starts feeling relieved, but it’s only Chad arriving. Jensen groans in frustration.

Chad immediately picks up on his tension. “What’s wrong?”

Jensen swallows hard. “Jay… Jared he went to the park with Justin and Brooke hours ago and they haven’t been back yet and his phone is turned off! I wonder if…”

Chad frowns. ‘Wonder what?”

Jensen’s face falls, and he feels his cheeks burning with the admission, his voice coming out lower. “What if Jared decided to leave me to go back to Justin?”

Chad’s jaw drops and he stares at Jensen as if he had three heads.

“Are you fucking insane??”

Jensen shrugs, feeling ashamed. “I dunno, they have a history together and a daughter and I--”

“Jensen stop right there.” Chad places a hand on his shoulder. “You’re not thinking straight here. Come on, don’t you know already how much Jared loves you? I know things were rough at first and I wanted to punch you for being such an asshole but everything has changed. I know Jared has never felt for anyone what he feels for you, and that includes Justin. I could see very clearly Jared falling out of love with him and gradually in love with you. And I know for a fact no feelings resurfaced once Justin returned. Jared still loves you just as much as he has for a while now. And let’s say that in the very very _very_ tiny and remote circumstance that Jared indeed decided he was better off with Justin, he would never in a million years leave without coming clean with you, Jensen. He would at least talk to you, he would never disappear like this, I’m a hundred percent sure about this. So now I’m really worried, because I think something may really have happened to Jared if he’s not answering his phone.”

Chad digs out his own phone and starts scrolling down.

“What are you doing?” Jensen asks in a low voice, ashamed of even considering that Jared could have left him like this. He should have had more faith in him.

Chad puts the phone in his ear. “Calling Justin. I have his number, if it’s still the same.” Chad only waits a few seconds before cursing and ending the call. “It went to voicemail.”

Both men stare at each other, panic sinking in, and neither of them have to speak out loud what they’re thinking.

Something very bad has happened.

Jensen’s eyes fill with tears as he sinks down on the bed, grabbing his hair with both hands and looking up at Chad, feeling an utter despair taking over him.

“He took Jared and Brooke. That lunatic took them, Chad!”

Chad covers his mouth with a hand and starts pacing, trying to think. “We should go to the park they went to, maybe it’s not that, maybe they’re somewhere out of signal range and we are freaking out here and it’s just…”

Suddenly the doorbell rings and Jensen is on his feet and at the door and half a second, praying for Jared to be on the other side. But when he opens the door, his heart sinks again, it’s just one of the doormen.

“What?” Jensen knows he’s being rude but he’s way past the point of caring.

The man looks nervous. “I’m sorry Mr. Ackles, but we found this and I think it belongs to you or to your… well, partner.”

The man hands Jensen a cell phone. Jensen recognizes it immediately from the case.

It’s Jared’s phone.

Jensen’s heart sinks to the ground as he takes it and looks back at the man, his voice coming out raspy. “Where did you find this?”

“It was actually in a plant vase, next to the front door. It was turned off but we turned it on just to see if we could find out who the owner was.”

Jensen nods, feeling completely numb. He presses a button and the screen lights up, revealing a picture of Jared, Jensen and Brooke as lockscreen. Jensen murmurs a thanks to the man, barely hearing himself, and closes the door. He turns to Chad, more tears filling his eyes.

“It’s Jared’s phone! That son of a bitch premeditated everything! He managed to get ahold of Jared’s phone and left it here, probably so we wouldn’t find a way to trace it! Motherfucker!”

Jensen punches a hole in the wall, trying to lash out all the anger penting up inside him. That motherfucker Hartley has Jared and his daughter and Jensen has no idea where. Chad grabs Jensen by the shoulders and forces him to look at him.

“Jensen, let’s try and calm down, then get to action! I still think we should go check the park, chances are slim that they’re there, I know, but it’s a start. Then we can think of what to do.”

Jensen nods, barely feeling the pain in his knuckles. “Yeah, anything is better than staying here.”

Jensen and Chad go down to the garage and Jensen hands Chad the keys, he isn’t in the right mind to drive right now. So Chad does it for him and they go to the park Jared said Justin was taking them. Jensen feels hopeless but they search around anyway, asking a few vendors if they saw Jared and Brooke, Jensen showing pictures, but nobody claims to have seen them.

Jensen lets out a breath and turns to Chad. “They were never here, Chad. Justin lied, this was never what he intended. He had it all figured out, he took Jared and Brooke somewhere and I don’t know where they are and _oh my God._”

Jensen starts feeling dizzy, as if he’s about to pass out, and leans over, supporting his hands on his knees and lowering his head, and it’s hard to breathe. Chad holds onto his shoulders, trying to calm him down. He manages to walk Jensen to a nearby bench and both sit down. Jensen finally breaks down completely, grabbing his hair to the point it hurts and sobbing, letting out all his anguish. He has no idea where his boyfriend and daughter are and this is the most devastating feeling he could ever know.

Chad rubs a hand on his back, trying to offer some comfort. “We are gonna find them, Jensen. I know we will. Justin won’t win in this. It’s gonna be fine.”

Chad waits for Jensen to calm down a bit to suggest they go to the Ackles’s residence, so they can fill Jensen’s parents in on what’s going on, maybe they can help think of something. Jensen acquiesces, and allows Chad to help him up. His friend drives to the house, and Jensen feels completely numb during the whole ride.

When they arrive, Chad opens the door and Jensen slowly goes inside. He stands in the foyer for a while, at a loss of what to do, and his dad comes out of the kitchen.

“Hey son, didn’t know you were coming!”

Jensen stares at him and doesn’t answer for a moment. Donna comes from the living room and feels equally surprised at seeing him.

“Oh Jensen, Chad, hi. Sorry son, I know I haven’t talked to you for the past few days but everything has been hard on me, I’m still having trouble accepting that…”

“Jared and Brooke are gone.” Jensen cuts his mother off, his voice coming out completely flat, his eyes shadowed.

Donna shuts up immediately, her eyes going wide. “What? They left you? Wait a second, did Jared go back to that ex-boyfriend of his?”

Jensen shakes his head, unable to answer, and lowers his head pinching his eyes with his fingers as his body shakes. Chad steps forward and places a hand on his shoulder, thankfully answering for him.

“No. Justin took Jared and Brooke against his will. He was supposed to take them to a nearby park since he had asked Jared to see Brooke sometimes, but they just disappeared and we haven’t heard from them in a while.”

Donna frowns. “How do you know Jared didn’t go with him willingly?”

“Because I’ve known Jared almost half my life, he would never do that. Even if he did want to go back to Justin, which he does not, he would have talked to Jensen first. But Jared loves Jensen, he feels nothing for Justin anymore. Plus, Justin found a way to grab Jared’s phone and leave it behind, it was found thrown in a plant vase in Jensen’s building, turned off, so we couldn’t trace it. Justin has Jared and Brooke somewhere, we have no idea what’s happening to them. They may even be in danger, we don’t know.”

It takes a few moments for Donna and Alan comprehend what Chad just told them, but then finally Donna’s face changes completely, it fills with compassion for her son. She steps forward and wraps her arms around Jensen.

“Oh my god baby, I’m so sorry! I’m so sorry, we are gonna find them, I promise!”

Jensen hugs her back tightly, seeking comfort desperately. She holds him as he breaks down once more, and when Jensen is able to calm down a little, he backs away a bit to look at Donna, speaking in a low, broken voice.

“Sorry mom, I know we lied to you and Jared isn’t who you thought he was, and that Brooke isn’t your real granddaughter but I love them so much mom, so so much. I’m so scared, I can’t lose them. I don’t know what I’m gonna do if…”

Donna places both hands in Jensen’s face. “Shh, it’s okay baby. You don’t need to apologize. I shouldn’t have been so harsh on you, I think I understand better now that I’ve had some time to reflect. It’s gonna be okay. I promise we are gonna do everything we can to find them, Jensen. We aren’t gonna let that bastard win, we will get Jared and my granddaughter back. You can be sure about it.”

Amid the immense pain, Jensen still manages to give Donna a small smile at hearing her referring to Brooke as her granddaughter. It gives him more strength to face what’s to come.

Jensen makes a promise to himself then and there he’s gonna find Jared and Brooke even if he has to search the whole planet for them.

_ **Jared** _

**A few hours earlier**

Justin has been driving for a while and Jared is starting to feel worried.

“Why aren’t we there yet? I thought we were going to that park closer to the building.”

Justin doesn’t answer, just stays focused on the drive. “Nope. It’s a bit further ahead.”

Jared’s heart starts beating faster, something is not right, and then Justin takes an exit to the freeway. Jared looks at him with a frown.

“Where the fuck are we going, Justin? We don’t need to take the freeway to go to the park, go back right now! I want to go back home, please!”

Justin looks quickly at Jared and then back ahead. “Nope Jared, sorry. I know you wouldn’t come with me willingly if I asked you, you are under a spell with that Ackles guy, so I had to do this. I’m sorry it has to be this way.”

Jared’s heart stops, and he looks at Justin feeling horrified. This can’t be happening. “Have you lost your mind, Justin?? Why are you doing this? Where are you taking us?”

Justin gives Jared a smile that sends chills up his arms. “To a place where we can be together, as a family. Don’t you see it, Jared? We need to be together, the three of us. _I_ am Brooke’s father, not that idiot. He had no right registering her as his daughter and taking what’s mine. So I’m gonna show him. We are gonna be one happy family. You’ll see. You are gonna forget Ackles in no time.”

Tears stream down Jared’s face, this just cannot be happening. It’s a nightmare, it has to be. He’s gonna wake up and Jensen will be next to him, Brooke in her crib and it will all be gone. Except the pain Jared feels is very real, Justin is kidnapping them and there’s no waking up from it.

Jared reaches for the diaper bag on the floor behind him, but when he opens the front pocket, his phone isn’t there. He searches inside the bag as well, but it’s futile.

“Looking for something?”

Jared frowns. “What did you do to my phone?”

Justin just shrugs. “It fell out while we were leaving the building, can you believe that? Such a shame.”

Jared feels his blood boiling, he throws the bag on the back seat and then looks around him desperately, studying his surroundings with a hand on the door handle.

“I want to get out of here Justin!”

Justin looks at him and smirks. “You want to jump?” Then he looks at the rearview mirror, where he has a perfect view of Brooke in the car seat. “Go ahead. I can even slow down a bit if it makes it easier for you.”

_Son of a motherfucking bitch_! Justin planned this perfectly, he knows Jared will never jump out of the car. There’s no way he can unhook Brooke from her carseat and absolutely no way in hell he will leave her alone with Justin. And of course, even if Jared _could_ get Brooke, it would be too dangerous to jump holding her.

Jared is trapped in the car with Justin, going God knows where and with absolutely no way to contact Jensen. His chest hurts, imagining if he will ever see Jensen again, if Jensen will ever be able to find them.

Jared surrenders, leaning against the window and looking outside, not really seeing anything.

“I hate you,” he says to Justin without looking at him, tears streaming down his face.

God help them.

*

Justin drives for about an hour and Jared just feels numb. He remembers that day a few months ago when Jensen took him out on their first date, he also drove for a while and Jared was so excited back then. So different than today. It was such an amazing day, Jensen made sure to give them a perfect first date. Jared thinks about Jensen the whole ride, everything they lived together. They had such a rocky start, Jared assumed Jensen would be his biggest problem, he did everything he could to be away from Jensen as often as possible, and now he would give the world to see Jensen again. He sends a silent prayer up to the universe, hoping it reaches the destination.

_Jensen, please find us._

Justin tries to start a conversation a few times but Jared completely ignores him, so he eventually gives up. At some point they take an exit and Justin drives for a long time on smaller roads and they get further into the woods. Jared gets more and more apprehensive, he knows it’s gonna be even harder for anyone to find them. Justin finally parks in front of a cabin, completely secluded from the rest of the world. Jared can see a lake nearby, but he looks around and can’t see any other buildings anywhere near. Justin made sure they would be well hidden.

Before exiting the car, Jared turns to Justin with narrowed eyelids. “Why are you doing this?”

Justin smiles. “I told you. You need to understand that we are meant to be together. I brought you here so you can forget that Ackles. It’s gonna be great, you will see.”

Justin reaches out, meaning to touch Jared’s face, but he smacks the hand away and purses his lips. “Don’t touch me.” With that, Jared gets out of the car and goes to the back door to get Brooke. When Jared lifts her from the carseat she wakes up, looking at her daddy with bright eyes. Jared holds her close to his chest and kisses the top of her head.

“It’s gonna be okay baby girl,” he whispers only to her. “Papa will find us. You’ll see. He will come.”

Justin gets out of the car looking excited. “Do you like it? I saw pictures of this place and I thought it would be perfect for us! We are gonna have a great time here!”

Jared turns to him. “Me and Brooke don’t even have clothes Justin, how are we supposed to stay here?”

Justin goes to the trunk and takes out two medium suitcases and a small pink one. “I packed for all of us! Went shopping and we are all set!”

Jared doesn’t even bother answering, just turns away from Justin to stare at the lake. When he hears the front door unlocking he walks inside, still holding Brooke close, not bothering to hide the tears streaming down his face. Justin closes the door behind him.

“Come upstairs, let’s check out the bedrooms.”

Jared doesn’t care one bit but he goes anyway, dragging his feet up the stairs that start in the middle of the living area taking to the second floor. Justin opens the first door, showing a room with a crib and a dresser.

“This is our daughter’s room. Nice huh?”

Jared bites his tongue not to answer, at least for now since he’s still trying to process everything. Then Justin walks to another door and opens it up as well.

“This is our bedroom.”

Jared peeks inside and sees the king size bed, his eyes widen instantly and his eyebrows shoot up as he looks back at Justin. “Excuse me? _Our _bedroom? There’s no way in hell I’m sharing a bed with you!”

Justin frowns. “What’s the matter? It’s only natural we share a bed Jared! We belong together!”

Jared shakes his head, giving him a humorless laugh. “No we don’t Justin. I belong to Jensen and him alone. I won’t share a bed with anyone else that isn’t him, you hear me? I’d rather sleep on the rug by Brooke’s crib than on that bed with you!”

Justin looks pissed for a few moments and finally huffs, rolling his eyes. “Fine! You can take this bedroom, I’ll go stay in the one down the hall. At least until you get real and realize we should be together. I can wait.”

Jared scoffs. “You can wait until hell freezes over.”

*

Once Justin brings Jared and Brooke’s suitcases up to his room, Jared shuts the door on his face.

“Jare…” He starts, but Jared screams from behind the closed door.

“Get away from here! I don’t want to see you! Leave us alone!”

“I’ll call you when dinner is ready.”

Jared doesn’t even answer, he goes to the bed and starts nursing Brooke, who had started to get fussy. Jared thinks about Jensen and how he loves to be with Jared when he’s nursing. Tears of desperation flood his eyes, Jared finally breaks down completely with the situation. He looks down at Brooke, who is nursing peacefully, and closes his eyes shut, his whole body shaking. Everything was going well, Donna was having a hard time accepting the truth but Jared knew she would come around eventually. Jensen, him and Brooke would start a beautiful little family, maybe even add to it in the future. Jensen even talked about adopting a dog when they had their own place, he knows how much Jared loves dogs. Jared felt adrift his whole life after his grandma passed away, not really belonging anywhere. In the most unlikely person he had finally found his home, he was _happy_. He had Jensen who turned out to be an amazing guy, who loves Jared with his whole heart and took on the role of Brooke’s father, not caring for a second that she doesn’t have his blood.

And now Jared is here, without any means to contact Jensen. Suddenly, a thought floods Jared’s brain.

What if Jensen thinks Jared willingly took off with Justin? What if he assumes Jared decided he wanted Justin? If that’s the case then Jensen won’t come after him. Jared prays that Jensen has faith in him, that he just _knows _Jared would never do that, that he loves Jensen and nobody else. That Jensen will find a way to get to Jared.

Jared holds Brooke closer to his chest, closing his eyes and going to his happy place, he imagines the botanical gardens where he’s with Jensen and Brooke having a picnic, Jensen taking pictures and singing to them. No matter what Justin does, this is the one thing he will never take away from him.

Brooke finishes nursing and Jared places her on his shoulder. He walks around the room, rocking her as fresh tears fall down his face.

“Brooke, this is so you won’t forget about Papa, okay? I’ll sing to you just until he finds us and can do it again. I know I’m nowhere near as good as Papa but I hope you won’t mind. Okay, here it goes.”

_Wise men say_   
_Only fools rush in_   
_But I can't help falling in love with you_

_Shall I stay?_   
_Would it be a sin_   
_If I can't help falling in love with you?_

Jared’s throat closes and he can’t go on, everything hurts too much, not knowing what will happen to them, if they will have a chance to get out of here.

Jared just wishes he could see Jensen one more time.

*

Jared pushes the food around his plate, not really feeling like eating anything. Brooke is sleeping in his arms, he could just put her on the couch while he eats but he just wants to keep her close. Justin is sitting across from him and Jared just looks at his plate, not wishing to look at him. Jared came downstairs for dinner when Justin announced it was ready, he didn’t want to but thought it would be better to eat something, he needs some nutrients so he can feed Brooke, but Jared is having a hard time swallowing anything.

“The food isn’t good?” Justin asks and Jared doesn’t even look up.

“I’m just not that hungry.”

“Jare, you need to eat.”

Jared looks at him with sharp eyes. “I know that I need to eat, thank you.” Jared sighs and sets his fork down, looking defeated. “Justin please, take us back. I don’t want to be with you, you can’t possibly think this is a good idea. I don’t love you anymore.”

Justin leans forward and stares at Jared intensely. “But you will Jared, I know you will! That’s why we are here, just us. You will realize eventually that I’m the right one for you. You’re gonna forget all about Ackles.”

Jared is done, he decides he can’t even try eating anymore. He pushes back in his chair and stands up.

“I’m going to my room.”

Jared starts walking away and Justin hurries to walk behind him.

“Jared come on! Let’s hang out for a bit, we can go to the living room and chat!”

Jared turns around with cold eyes. “I have nothing else to say to you.”

With that, Jared rushes up the stairs without looking back.

He decides he just can’t leave Brooke in another room, he misses his own room with the adjacent nursery. And Jared just won’t feel safe sleeping away from his daughter in this place. So he leaves Brooke in the middle of his big bed and goes to get the crib. Thankfully it isn’t too big or heavy, so it’s easy to drag it to his room. When Justin hears the noise and asks what he’s doing, Jared simply tells him he wants his daughter close. Jared locks the bedroom door before going to bed.

He barely gets any sleep. He tosses and turns; Brooke wakes up in the middle of the night and Jensen isn’t there to pick her up and bring her to Jared, he isn’t there to stay awake with Jared while she feeds. Jared cries.

*

It’s after breakfast the next morning that Justin crosses the line for the first time. Brooke has fallen asleep and Jared places her on the couch, and when he straightens up and turns around, Justin is right up his personal space.

Jared frowns, his heartbeat speeding up. “What are you doing?”

Justin takes a step even closer and Jared is trapped with the couch behind him, with Brooke on it. Jared’s eyes widen as Justin places a hand on his waist and closes the distance.

“Come on Jare, let’s stop playing games and get to action already. I miss your body, I wanna taste you.”

When Justin goes for Jared’s lips he shoves him back, hard, feeling grossed out. “Don’t touch me! I want nothing to do with you, can’t you see that?”

Jared tries to walk away but Justin insists and grabs his bicep, forcing him to turn around and speaking close to his face.

“Aw come on, don’t be such a prude! I know you miss my dick in you, don’t deny it!”

That’s what it takes to make Jared’s blood boil, and he laughs at Justin’s face.

“Oh, you think I’m a prude? Alright then, how about I tell you all about Jensen’s dick instead?” Jared narrows his eyelids as he stares at a dumbstruck Justin. “Oh Justin, you have no idea. Jensen’s dick is so huge and thick. When he fucked me for the first time was just perfect, I felt full like I never did before, he fucked me so good. No, better yet. He made love to me so sweet and tender. And when he kisses me? Oh those full lips taste so damn good. They also look perfect when they’re wrapped around my cock. It’s such a shame we only got to do it with a condom, I can’t wait to have him come inside me and fill me completely with his release. And maybe if I’m lucky I can get pregnant again and we can have a second child. That would be just perfect, wouldn’t it?”

Justin’s face turns a shade of red. “Brooke is my daughter, don’t forget that!”

“No, she isn’t!” Jared yells in Justin’s face, pointing a finger at him. “Brooke is Jensen’s daughter, you hear me? You may have given your sperm to conceive her, but you will never be her father! Especially after going as low as kidnapping us to force us to be with you against my will! Blood doesn’t mean a fucking thing, Jensen is Brooke’s father, has been since before she was born! He was with me when I learned I was having a girl, the one who got to hold her first, he was with me in the delivery room, did you know that? He is the one who takes care of her, who wakes up in the middle of the night, who goes to the doctor’s appointments, who changes her diapers! You are nothing to her, _nothing_!”

“Well, I would have done all those things if you had fucking told me the truth from the beginning!”

Jared scoffs. “I would have if you hadn’t lied to me and accused me of being with you just for your money, if you hadn’t tried to buy my baby! Jensen never lied to me! What we have is real, and will always be! You may try Justin, you may keep me in here, forcing me to stay with you, but you know what? I know I’m gonna go back to Jensen eventually, one way or another. We are gonna find our way back to each other because love _always _wins. And you will lose, Justin. When you get real and realize what you’re doing it’s gonna be too late. I wish I could say you’re not like this but turns out, I don’t know you at all. And I don’t ever want to.”

Jared hears Brooke making some noises, signaling she’s awake. “Oh and one more thing.” Jared gets closer to Justin and grabs his crotch, squeezing and twisting his dick and balls as hard as he can, making Justin’s eyes water. “Keep this away from me while you’re forcing me to stay here, otherwise I’ll do some serious damage and I’m sure you won’t enjoy it.”

Jared releases Justin who whimpers and falls to his knees, groaning in pain. He then takes Brooke from the couch and walks towards the door, only turning his head in Justin’s direction. “I’m gonna go get some air with _my_ daughter. Don’t come after us.”

Jared goes outside and walks in the direction of the lake. He knows his behavior isn’t typical of him, but it’s the only weapon he has against Justin. He will _not _allow the man to come close to either of them, Jared would rather kill Justin before allowing him to touch his body. If he wants Jared here, this is how it’s gonna be, he won’t acquiesce to Justin at all. Jared will stand up for himself and his daughter until there’s a way for them to get out of here and back to Jensen.

As the adrenaline fades, Jared allows a few tears to run down his cheeks, and he kisses Brooke’s head before whispering in the direction of the blue sky.

“Jen… please find us.”

**TO BE CONTINUED...**


	19. Chapter 19

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey guys! sorry for not updating sooner, I know guys were probably waiting for this chapter. Things are very crazy everywhere at the moment and I hope everyone is safe and okay. I also wanted to update today because I'm very upset due to the cancelation of the Backstreet Boys gig I was supposed to go tomorrow, I've been waiting 20 years for this. But I think they will be back, I hope they will. 
> 
> Anyway, I really hope you like this chapter. It's a rollercoaster of emotions, and I'm really proud of it. We only have one more chapter to go after this one, and I'm planning on finishing this story next week. I'm very excited about it! 
> 
> If you can, pleeease leave a comment. I really could use the joy right now! <3

_ **Jensen** _

It has been three days since Jensen really slept. It feels like a huge part of him has been ripped out, it’s like he’s missing a limb. Actually two limbs. He misses Jared and Brooke so much it physically hurts. It has been three days since the son of a bitch took them from him and Jensen feels dead inside. Jensen never thought he could hurt this much.

There hasn’t been any news so far, and Jensen doesn’t know what to do. Right after Jensen came home and told his parents what happened, Alan called Mark Hartley to demand him to tell them where Justin had taken Jared and Brooke. The man sounded very surprised on the phone, saying he was coming to Dallas right away since he was in San Antonio. When the man arrived he claimed not knowing anything and asking for an explanation of what had happened. Jensen didn’t believe he was innocent, but Alan had briefly explained to him the events nonetheless.

“I want you to tell me right now where your monster of a son took Jared and my daughter!” Jensen had demanded once his father finished talking.

Hartley had lifted his palms in surrender, looking shocked. “Look, I swear I had no idea about any of this! I tried to contact Justin during the whole ride here but his phone is disconnected. I have no idea where he is or where he might have taken Jared and Brooke. Are you sure Jared didn’t just decide to leave with Justin?”

Jensen could tell Mark wasn’t asking this to be mean, he was honestly checking all the possibilities, but Jensen saw red anyway. He wanted to punch the guy in the face for even suggesting it, but Chad grabbed his shoulder to keep him in place. Jensen took a deep breath and looked at the man through narrowed eyelids.

“No, he didn’t. Jared loves me and he would never do that! And even if he wanted to, he would never leave without telling me, he’s too honest for that. Your son kidnapped them and I demand to know where they are!”

“Look Jensen, I’m truly sorry but like I said, I have no idea where Justin is, his phone is turned off. But if this is true, I’m gonna do everything to find them. I know it may not seem like it to you from the way I first barged in here, and I apologize for that, but I do have principles and this behavior I don’t agree with. I’m gonna do everything I can to find them, I promise you. If Jared doesn’t want my son back I would never force this situation, all I wanted was a relationship with my granddaughter. I didn’t think this would get out of hand like this and again, I apologize. I’m on your side in this to find them and make sure all ends well.”

Mark kept his promise, he hired private detectives to try and find Justin, Jared, and Brooke. Jensen’s father also had some contacts in the Dallas police who were also keeping an eye out, but so far there hasn’t been any news. It’s almost as if the three of them just vanished from the planet. Jensen prays every minute that Justin didn’t do something really stupid, that he is just hiding with them somewhere, and will be found eventually. Jensen also doesn’t rule out Jeff having a hand in this because now he believes Jeff can be capable of a lot of things Jensen never thought possible. But when he tried to contact the man, it was futile. Jeff’s phone was also turned off and he wasn’t in his apartment. He truly hopes Jeff isn’t with them as well. Jensen has reached such a level of desperation and exhaustion that he thinks he might even kill someone for Jared and Brooke.

Jensen doesn’t do anything except repeatedly try to call Justin’s phone, in vain, or wander restlessly around the house. Donna has put everything behind her, she forgave all of them for the lie and she is truly devastated for everything that’s happening, praying all day long for Jared and her granddaughter to come back. She has apologized to Jensen and Chad a million times for being so harsh, even though both have told her she has nothing to be sorry for. Jensen knows she feels guilty for not coming around sooner, afraid now it’s too late. Jensen hopes it isn’t.

Jensen and Chad have come back to the Ackles’ house, but they keep the doors to Jared’s room and the nursery closed. Jensen went into Jared's room on the first day, but he had to leave immediately. Too many emotions took over him, the memories of happy moments flooded him. Seeing that bedroom and knowing Jared was nowhere to be found pierced a hole through Jensen’s heart. So he closed the door and hasn't been back inside since. More often than not Jensen lies in his bed thinking about everything. The rough start he and Jared had, how he couldn’t stand Jared at first. And then how naturally they started gravitating towards each other, like magnets. It was inevitable. Jared wormed his way into Jensen’s heart and made it explode into a million butterflies, he knocked down all his walls and brought the real Jensen to the surface, turned him into someone better. And Jared did all of this without any effort, just by being _him_. Jared saved Jensen in the most important way, he taught Jensen the meaning of true love. Jared gave him the most precious present of all, a beautiful daughter.

Jensen doesn’t know what he would do if he loses them both. Jared and Brooke are already a vital part of him, and without them… Jensen is just a shell.

He slowly gets up from the bed and goes to the window, looking up at the sky, wondering if Jared is also seeing it. He closes his eyes and whispers as a tear runs down his cheek.

“Where are you Jay? Gimme a sign please, I’ll go to the end of the world to find you.”

_ **Jared** _

Jared wakes up on the fifth day feeling even more down. It’s getting harder and harder to stay here with Justin, he barely sleeps or eats, he doesn’t feel like doing anything. The only thing keeping Jared barely functioning is Brooke, if it wasn’t for her he would probably have given up somehow. Justin still has this crazy notion that Jared will magically fall back in love with him if they stay here, he doesn’t see the damage he’s doing to Jared. Jared has tried to argue with him a few times but it was futile, so he has given up. And he keeps being a petulant asshole to Justin, provoking him every time he comes too close, making sure he knows how amazing Jensen is. Jared is truly exhausted and he isn’t sure how much more of this he can take. He even tried to find the keys to Justin’s car while he was sleeping, so he could try and escape, but it was in vain. And Jared knows how far away from any civilization they are, so he can’t escape by foot, especially with Brooke. Jared can’t see a light at the end of this dark tunnel he’s in.

Brooke starts crying loudly, and Jared drags himself out of the bed to go get his daughter in the crib.

“Hey baby girl, Daddy is here.”

When Jared picks her up, he notices something is wrong. She is too warm to the touch, so he runs to get her thermometer to check her temperature.

It reads 102ºF.

_Oh God. _

Brooke has never had a fever before and Jared feels panicked, doesn’t know what to do. He’s afraid to give her anything without consulting with a doctor first, and of course this had to happen when they are being kept far from the outside world. Jared holds Brooke close, who is still crying, and rushes out of the room. He sees Justin in the living room and walks down the stairs as fast as he can while carefully holding the baby.

“Justin!”

Justin turns around and sees the panic in Jared’s eyes. “What happened? Why is Brooke crying like this?”

“She has a high fever! We need to get her to the hospital so the doctor can check on her, I don’t know what to do!”

Justin shakes his head vehemently. “No way, Jared! We are not going anywhere, you hear me? I know you only want to go so you can get away from me and this is not happening!”

Jared sees red, he grabs the front of Justin’s shirt and brings him up to his face. “If you don’t want to take us to the hospital then get a doctor to come here! My daughter is sick and she needs care, if you don’t do this right the fuck now and something happens to her, I’m literally gonna kill you! And I’ve never been so serious about something in my whole life!”

Jared lets go of Justin, who stumbles back, looking stunned as he takes in the seriousness of the situation. “Okay, yeah… fine, I’ll see if I can find a doctor to come here.”

Jared points a finger to his face. “I’m gonna take her upstairs so she can eat and have a cool bath. I want this doctor here as fast as possible. I mean it.”

With that, Jared goes back upstairs. He feeds Brooke so she can calm down a little. Jared spends a long while with her this close to him, caressing her flushed skin as tears stream down his face.

“You will be okay baby, don’t worry. I’m sorry Daddy hasn’t been taking care of himself as he should, I probably caused this for you.”

Jared feels such a failure in so many ways.

He manages to give Brooke a lukewarm bath and change her into fresh clothes. He rocks her, singing her lullaby, until she finally falls asleep. Jared holds her for a while until finally there’s a knock on the door.

“Jared, the doctor is here.”

Jared lets out a deep breath in relief, and opens the door. Justin gives him a pointed look and speaks in a low voice.

“Don’t do anything stupid. I mean it. I told the doctor your name is Tris and you go with it.”

Justin goes downstairs where the doctor is waiting, and Jared follows him. Justin stands between them both.

“Tris, this is doctor Amell, he’s a pediatrician. He was very nice to agree to come here, since we decided to come so far just so we could enjoy being alone together, right?”

Justin gives him a fake smile and Jared only nods, his expression blank, as he shakes the doctor’s hand. He stares at Jared with an odd expression on his face, and Jared wonders for a second what’s wrong but there are more urgent matters.

“Doctor, can you check on my baby? She has a high fever and since I have never dealt with this, I don’t know what to do.”

Doctor Amell gives him a sympathetic smile. “Sure, Tris. Let’s get her to the couch so I can take a look at her, shall we?”

Jared does as he’s told and waits as the doctor examines Brooke, feeling apprehensive. After a while, he turns to Jared.

“Tris, I don’t think there’s anything too serious with her. I only suggest you stay on a healthy diet so she can receive proper nutrients. I’m gonna prescribe something to help with the fever and hopefully it will go down soon. If it comes back tomorrow then I suggest you take her to a hospital, alright?” Jared nods. “Okay, I have what I need here so I’m gonna administer a dose and see how she reacts.”

The doctor gives Brooke a few drops of something, and then sits by her side to monitor her for a while. Jared pulls up a chair and sits in front of them. As they wait, the doctor keeps sending him some looks but doesn’t say anything, probably because Justin is standing an inch away from Jared.

Suddenly, an idea strikes Jared.

He gets up from the chair and looks at Justin. “I need to go to the bathroom, be right back.”

With that, Jared rushes upstairs. When he reaches his bedroom, he runs to find Brooke’s diaper bag, where he always keeps a small notebook and a pen, just in case he needs to write something down. Thank God for that.

Jared rips out a page and starts writing with a shaking hand.

_“Please help me, tell Jensen Ackles where I am, number”_

Jared spends some precious seconds trying to remember Jensen’s number as he hears Justin’s voice just outside his bedroom.

“Jared? You okay in there?”

Jared jumps and quickly folds the note, stuffing it in his front pocket, just in time for Justin to appear at the door. Jared pretends to be pulling his shorts up.

“Yeah, sorry. Needed to pee.”

Justin frowns. “Yeah, come back downstairs please. The doctor is leaving.”

Jared buries both hands in his pockets and follows Justin downstairs. Doctor Amell makes sure Brooke is secure on the couch and gets up.

“Well Tris, her fever has gone down a bit, please keep monitoring her. As I said, if the fever returns don’t hesitate to get her to the hospital.”

Jared nods. “Will do, Doctor. Thank you so much for your help.”

Doctor Amell smiles. “It’s no problem at all.” He shakes Justin’s hand first and then turns to Jared, who takes his hand of the pocket and smiles at the doctor as he shakes his hand and silently begs.

_Please don’t react._

The doctor narrows his eyes just a fraction as the paper touches his hand, but other than that he doesn’t say anything, just buries his hand in his pocket and leaves. Justin goes with him to see him out, and Jared sinks down on the couch next to Brooke, whispering a desperate prayer.

_God, help me please. Let this doctor be a good person, let him be able to find Jensen and tell him where I am please. He’s my only hope._

_Please._

_ **Chad** _

Chad is in Alex’s apartment, lazily making out with him on the couch, it feels good and Alex is very amazing and sweet, but Chad’s mind is just not fully in it and Alex feels it. His boyfriend pulls away and stares at him intensely, caressing his face with a hand.

“You’re worried about Jared, right?”

Chad nods. “Yeah. So far there hasn’t been any news, it’s like they dropped off the face of the Earth. Nobody has any clue where that lunatic took them, not even his father. I can’t stop thinking about Jared and Brooke, what’s happening to them right now. Jensen is losing it, I don’t know what’s gonna happen to him if they don’t reappear soon. It sucks that we don’t even know where to begin looking, they could be anywhere. Justin may even have taken them back to San Antonio, Jensen is talking about going there to look around and see if he can find out anything. But still it’s hard since it’s a big city.” Chad sighs and his eyes well up, thinking about Jared and Brooke out there somewhere. “It’s been hard.”

Alex purses his lips. “I know. But they will be found, I know it. Everything is gonna end up fine, you’ll see. Love will always win, baby.”

Chad nods and relaxes into Alex’s shoulder, who caresses his hair. They stay in silence for a while until the front door clicks open. Chad lifts his head and sees it’s Alex’s roommate.

“Hey dude.” Chad gives him a half smile, and notices the man looks weird. He approaches the couch and sits down on the coffee table, staring at both Alex and Chad with wide eyes.

“What’s going on?” Alex asks, sitting up straighter. Chad does the same and leans forward, something serious must have happened to leave the man this shaken up.

He leans forward and rests his elbows on his knees. “Something very weird happened, and I need you guys’ help.”

Alex nods. “Yeah, okay. Tell us.”

“Well, I went to check on a baby today after I got a call, that clinic I work at recommended me. It was a fair distance away, a cabin in the middle of nowhere. When I got there I sensed a weird vibe, the guy who had called me looked very odd. Furtive somehow. And the other guy, who arrived with the baby, looked almost… sick. I don’t know. He was very pale, looked exhausted with bags under his eyes. The whole time I was there I was feeling bothered, I could tell something wasn’t right. I checked on the baby and before I left, when I shook hands with this guy he slipped me a piece of paper, and I read it right after getting into my car. He was asking for help, asked me to contact some guy and tell him where he is. But I think he couldn’t finish the note because the number isn’t on it. I’m really worried about him, he looked so scared and hopeless, and I need help finding this guy he mentioned so I can alert him.”

Something triggers in Chad’s brain and he scoots forward to the edge of the couch. “Stephen, who is the guy you need to contact?”

Stephen takes the note from his pocket and reads it. “His name is Jensen Ackles.”

“_WHAT_?” Chad’s heart stops, he gets up from the couch and grabs the note from Stephen’s hands.

_“Please help me, tell Jensen Ackles where I am, number”_

“Holy shit it’s Jared’s writing, I know it!” Chad turns to Alex, his heart beating ten miles a minute. “We found Jared and Brooke!”

“Wait a second,” Stephen asks, frowning. “The guy’s name is Tris. And I wasn’t told the baby’s name.”

Chad shakes his head, trying to clear it, too stunned with everything. “No, it has to be them!” He has an idea and grabs his phone, his fingers trembling as he searches the camera roll for a picture of Jared and Brooke, and showing it to Stephen.

“Are these them?”

Stephen’s eyes widen. “Oh my God, yes! You know them?”

Chad breaks down right there, sinking to the couch and burying his face in his hands, shaking. Alex wraps his arms around him and explains to Stephen.

“His name is Jared, not Tris. He’s Chad’s best friend, he and his daughter have been missing for almost a week, his crazy ex-boyfriend kidnapped them. Everyone has been searching for them like crazy, we had just been talking about it before you arrived. Jensen Ackles is Jared’s boyfriend who’s going insane with worry by now. Oh my God, it’s a miracle, Steve. That you of all people were the one chosen to go check on the baby. Holy shit.”

Stephen places a hand on Chad’s shoulder. “Where is Jensen? Call him right now, I’ll tell you where Jared and the baby are being kept.”

Chad straightens up and nods, trying to compose himself. They have a mission now, _they can rescue Jared and Brooke_. He grabs his phone and finds Jensen’s contact.

It rings about four times and finally Jensen’s voice answers, sounding completely devoid of any emotion.

“What?”

Chad pinches the bridge of his nose, Alex keeping a hand on his shoulder. “Jensen… I know where Jared and Brooke are.”

_ **Jensen** _

Jensen is in the middle of throwing a few things into an overnight bag. He is tired of staying put and not doing anything effective to find Jared and Brooke. He decided to go to San Antonio and try to find a clue, perhaps that’s where Justin took them. It has been five days and Jensen is about to lose it completely. This way Jensen will at least feel like he’s doing something instead of listlessly moping around.

He leaves the house and puts his things in the trunk, he will let his father know where he is later since he’s at the agency. Donna has gone to lunch with her friend Jackie so she could clear her mind a bit. Jensen is closing the trunk when his phone rings. He fishes it out of his pocket and sees it’s Chad calling. Jensen considers not answering it, and he almost doesn’t. But a strange urge makes him do it.

“What?”

Chad’s voice sounds raspy, as if he has been crying. “Jensen… I know where Jared and Brooke are.”

Jensen’s heart stops beating. He’s sure he has heard it wrong, it’s too good to be true. His voice comes out as a whisper. “What did you say?”

“Jensen, listen to me! It’s a long story and I’m gonna tell you all about it on the way there, but I have the address of where they are Jensen! Trust me! The person who gave me this info was with them just a few hours ago!”

Jensen’s legs give out and he falls to his knees on the ground, pinching the bridge of his nose, tears exploding out of his eyes.

“Oh God,” he chokes out, his vision blurring. He can hear Chad’s voice from somewhere far away.

“Jensen! Jensen, are you there? Breathe! And please talk to me.”

Jensen nods eagerly, trying to focus. He clutches the phone with both hands. “Yes, I am! I’m here!”

“Can you pick me up from Alex’s place? We can go after them!”

Jensen is up and getting in the car in two seconds. “Yes, I’m on my way! Where are you?”

Chad gives him the address, which isn’t far.

“I’ll be there in five, meet me on the sidewalk.”

He throws the phone on the back seat and starts the drive, wiping his eyes so he can see clearly. There’s only one thing in his mind.

_They found Jared and Brooke._

*

Jensen is pulling up to Alex’s building in about three minutes and thankfully Chad is already there. The man has barely closed his door when Jensen starts driving again, he doesn’t want to waste a single second.

“Tell me where I need to go first of all.”

Chad unlocks his phone. “I’ve inserted the location on Google Maps. The place is about an hour away.”

He gives Jensen directions and which exit to take, and soon they’re on the highway. Jensen is going way above the speed limit and he couldn’t care less. He needs to get to them as soon as possible.

He briefly turns to Chad. “Okay, now tell me how you found them.”

Chad tells Jensen the whole story about how Brooke had a fever and a doctor was called, and the doctor happened to be Alex’s roommate. How Stephen - the doctor - found the whole situation odd and in the end Jared managed to slip him a note, telling him to find Jensen, but couldn’t write his number.

“Here’s the note.”

Jennsen grabs it and holds it in front of him on top of the steering wheel. He almost loses control of the car when he recognizes Jared’s shaky handwriting, as if he was in a rush and under stress when he wrote it. Chad grabs the note back and tells him to focus on the road.

“Oh God…” A tears falls down Jensen’s face. “And how are they, Chad? Did Stephen say it? Are they okay?”

“He said Jared looked exhausted, very pale with bags under his eyes. But other than that he’s fine, considering everything. And Brooke is fine, she was running a slight fever but was also doing better when he left. He had told Jared to keep monitoring it.”

Jensen only nods, his throat closing up hearing news from his family for the first time. Now he knows they are alive, they’re somewhere and Jensen will go get them. It will be okay soon.

Eventually Chad directs him to take an exit and they drive through a smaller town, then they start distancing themselves from it, driving through woods, and Jensen curses Justin the whole time for taking Jared to such a hidden place.

Finally, after what seems like hours they stop near a cabin, and Chad announces that it has to be it from the directions in the maps and Stephen’s description. Chad alerts Jensen to park the car further away so Justin won’t hear it and Jensen agrees. He parks on the side of the small road and is out of the car in a second, already running to the cabin, Chad on his tail. Jensen spots an SUV parked in front, it has to be Justin’s car. He quickly checks inside and can see a car seat. Jensen’s heart beats fast in his chest, Jared and Brooke are somewhere inside this cabin, he can feel it.

Wasting no more time Jensen rushes to the front door. He quickly tests it and it’s locked. There’s no reason to pretend anymore so he speaks in a loud voice.

“Jared if you’re behind the door, step away!”

Jensen waits for a few seconds and hears no movement, so he steps back to get leverage and kicks the door, causing it to burst open. Jensen and Chad rush inside, finding the living room empty.

“JARED! Are you there?” Jensen screams up to the second floor.

A second later a door opens and no other than Jared comes running out of the room. When he sees Jensen, his face lights up like a Christmas tree.

“Jen!” Tears explode from his eyes and he gives Jensen the widest smile. “Oh my God, you found us!”

Jensen smiles back, feeling his heart exploding with the sight of Jared after this long. “Of course I did! Come on, let’s go home!”

Jared nods, suddenly looking apprehensive. “Hold on, I need to go get Brooke, we need to be quick because…”

At that moment, another door opens and Justin comes out of his bedroom, looking enraged as he sees Jensen.

“What are you doing here Ackles, how did you find us? Jared is_ mine_, you hear me? He doesn’t want you anymore!”

Jared turns to him. “I told you a million times that’s not true!” Jared turns to Jensen with pleading eyes. “Jen, don’t believe him, I didn’t want to come!” He looks at Justin again. “I told you love always wins Justin, and now I’m gonna go home with Jensen and our daughter.”

Jared turns to return to the room but Justin is quicker and reaches him, grabbing his forearm.

“No! You’re not going anywhere!”

“Let me go!” Jared tries to free himself from Justin’s strong grip, but he’s too weak. He tries to fight Justin and it all happens in a fraction of a second.

Jensen starts to rush upstairs to help Jared, but it’s too late. Jared has his back turned to the staircase, and as he jerks back to free his arm from Justin’s grip, he loses his balance.

“JARED, NO!” Jensen yells but it’s too late, Jensen sees Justin’s shocked face for a nanosecond, trying to grab ahold of him, and then it’s like watching a scene in slow motion. Jared falls backwards and rolls down the stairs, bumping hard on the steps, and everyone stays paralyzed in shock, watching in horror. It feels like a lifetime but it actually only takes a couple of seconds. Jared lands next to Jensen’s feet, on his side, arms and legs akimbo, unconscious.

Jensen sinks to his knees, tears streaming down his face as he looks at Jared, his heart beating loudly in his ears, not knowing what to do.

“No! No, no, no, no, no! Jay talk to me please!” Jensen’s hands hover over Jared’s body, he knows he can’t move him and is afraid to even touch. He places a gentle hand on his hair and another on his shoulder. “Jay please wake up!”

“Oh God, what did I do??” Jensen looks up and sees Justin with a horrified look on his face, and he’s grabbing his hair with both hands as he watches the scene. “I’m sorry I didn’t mean to, I…”

He makes a motion to go down the stairs but Jensen holds up a hand, his blood boiling with concern for Jared mixed with anger. “Stay away! If you come any close to Jared I’m gonna kill you, you hear me?? I mean it!” Jensen turns to Chad, who’s standing next to him looking like he’s in shock. “Chad! You with me??” Chad blinks a few times and nods. “Call 911, tell them we need an ambulance! And go find my daughter, bring her downstairs!” Jensen turns to Justin one more time. “You get the fuck away from here, I don’t want to see you!”

Jensen turns back to Jared as Chad gets in motion, he doesn’t even check to see if Justin is getting lost but he probably is. Jensen swallows hard as he takes in Jared’s state. He looks so fragile, as if he has lost weight in the five days he spent here. Jensen closes his eyes and sends a prayer as he places both fingers on Jared’s neck, to see if he can get a pulse.

_Please God, don’t take him away from me now that I’ve found him._

Jensen sinks to the floor next to Jared once he feels a steady pulse behind his skin. _Thank you._

Jensen buries his face in Jared’s neck, very carefully as not to move him not even an inch, and caresses his hair while whispering into his skin.

“You’re gonna be okay, Jay. Help will be here soon, it’s gonna be fine. Soon we are gonna be back in our house and we will be happy again. No matter what happens to you after this, I’m gonna be by your side, you hear me? We are gonna get through everything together, I got you baby. I got you, I got you.” Tears stream down Jensen’s face and wet Jared’s skin. “I love you so much Jay, oh my God, so much. More than anything, and I missed you so much. It felt like a part of my soul was missing and I was so scared of losing you. But you are gonna be fine, you hear me? Hang in there please Jay. Fight for me, for Brooke, for yourself. For our family. Please Jay. I need you.”

Jensen hears movement and raises his head to see Chad coming down the stairs, holding his daughter.

“The ambulance is on the way, they said it will take about ten to fifteen minutes.”

Jensen nods and lifts his arms, still kneeling by Jared’s side. “Give her to me, please.”

Chad quickly hands Brooke to Jensen, and when he holds his daughter and looks down at her, who is wide awake looking back at him with intense eyes, fresh tears fill his eyes.

“Hi, baby girl. Papa missed you so much, so so much.” Jensen buries his face in her tiny head, so he can scent her. “You smell so good, baby. It’s gonna be alright soon, Daddy will be fine. He will be fine.”

Jensen doesn’t leave Jared’s side as they wait, he keeps caressing his hair and murmuring nonsense to let Jared know he’s there, that he’s not alone. Chad sits on the steps on the other side of Jared and keeps a hand on his shoulder.

Finally they hear sirens in the distance and Chad rushes outside to go meet the ambulance. In a couple of minutes paramedics burst into the house, with Chad telling him what happened. Jensen reluctantly gets up, making room for them. One of the paramedics turns to Jensen.

“Was he moved at all after the fall?”

Jensen shakes his head. “No, we made sure we didn’t move him an inch. I j-just checked his p-pulse.”

The man nods and Jensen and Chad step aside to watch the paramedics work on Jared. They put a neck brace on and place him in a gurney and strap him in from head to toe. Jensen asks the paramedics if there’s any chance Jared can be taken back to Dallas and if he can go with him. Thankfully the paramedics deem him stable enough for a ride back to Dallas, and allow Jensen to go along. As they prepare to wheel Jared outside to the ambulance, Jensen turns to Chad and hands him his daughter.

“Chad, please take my car and take Brooke with you. Call my father and tell him everything that happened. When we get to Dallas I’ll let you know which hospital they took us to. Oh and please call my mom, ask her to please watch Brooke, she will probably need formula now that…”

“Jensen,” Chad places a hand on his shoulder. “It’s okay, I’ll take care of everything. Go with Jared, keep me posted.”

Jensen nods, handing Chad his car keys and kissing the top of Brooke’s head. Then he rushes out of the cabin and waits for the paramedics to push Jared into the ambulance, and climbs into it. Jensen takes a look at Jared who is still unconscious, with an oxygen mask strapped to his face. Jensen searches for Jared’s hand, and links their fingers together. He brings their joined hands to his face, and caresses his own cheek with the back of Jared’s hand, then planting a kiss on it.

“Hang in there, Jay. You’ll be fine.”

Jensen stays connected to Jared during the whole ride back to Dallas, praying for everything to be okay.

Arriving at the hospital, Jared is wheeled through some doors and Jensen is told he has to wait. He doesn’t want to, he wants to go with Jared, but he knows he can’t. So he fills out the necessary forms and calls Chad, telling him which hospital Jared was brought to. Chad tells him they will all be there soon.

Jensen sits on a chair in the waiting room and takes measured deep breaths, trying to calm himself now that the adrenaline is fading. The image of Jared falling down the stairs in front of him is imprinted in his mind and Jensen knows it will be there for a long time. It was the most terrifying seconds in his life, watching that horrific scene and not being able to stop it and he knows this is the stuff his nightmares will consist of, for years to come. Jensen prays nonstop for Jared to be okay, for him to get out of this alive.

_Don’t take Jared away from me please, not now that I found him again._

They still have so much to live through together, a family to build, a daughter to raise together, hopefully more kids in the future, Jensen would really like to get Jared pregnant himself. But even if something happens and the doctor tells them that Jared can’t have kids anymore, it’s okay. They have Brooke and Jensen is so happy with her already. All he needs is for Jared to be okay.

Jensen waits for a while and eventually Chad, Alex and Alan arrive. They all greet Jensen, his father giving him a tight hug, telling him Brooke is at home with Donna, and ask how Jared is. Jensen lets them know there’s no news yet. They all wait for a while, until finally a doctor comes and asks who is there for Jared Padalecki.

“That’s us,” Jensen tells the doctor.

“Hello, I’m Doctor Brown. Are you related to Mr. Padalecki?”

“I’m Jared’s boyfriend.” Jensen has a quick flashback to when he took Jared to the hospital months ago when Chad lied to the doctor telling him Jensen was Jared’s fiance and the father of his baby. Little did Jensen know back then. “He doesn’t have any family, he lives with my family and we are responsible for him.”

The doctor nods. “Fair enough. Well, I’m gonna let you know Jared is stable at the moment.” Jensen lets out a huge breath at that, feeling very relieved. “He had a mild concussion during the fall, and is still unconscious. He also twisted his right ankle, so he is going to be wearing a brace for a while. Our biggest concern now is that CT scan showed he has three broken ribs, and the edge of one punctured his lung. We will soon be performing surgery to repair his ribs and the affected lung. Mr. Padalecki will be out of the game for a while, he’s gonna need some time to recover from his injuries and of course I’m sure he will be feeling very sore from the fall, he is sporting a lot of bruises. None of his injuries are life threatening and with the proper recovery period and bedrest, I’m sure he will be fine eventually.”

Jensen closes his eyes and lets out another breath. Out of the many awful scenarios that passed through his head, this is a piece of cake. Jared is out of the woods and with no risk of a permanent injury. It’s much more than Jensen could ask for and he nods to the doctor.

“Don’t worry doctor, I will tie Jared to the bed if I have to, to keep him resting. I’m gonna take care of him for as long as he needs.”

Doctor Brown smiles at him. “Good. We are gonna prepare him for surgery and that’s gonna take a few hours. I’ll let you know when it’s over.”

They all thank the doctor, who leaves, and Jensen sinks on the chair, burying his face in his hands.

It’s gonna be fine.

*

They all settle down to wait for the surgery. Now that things have calmed down and looking a bit better, Jensen takes the opportunity to give Chad and Alex big hugs and thank them for what they did.

“If it weren’t for you guys I wouldn’t have found Jared and my daughter,” Jensen says with moist eyes. “Fate was so kind to us that the place they were being kept fell on your lap and I’ll forever be thankful. You have no idea how much.” Jensen turns to Alex. “Please tell Stephen I want to thank him personally. I’d love to meet the guy who was responsible for this miracle.”

Alex nods. “I sure will. Stephen was very worried about Jared and Brooke once I got to tell him everything that happened. I’m sure he’s gonna want to meet you too. And I’m very glad we could help and things ended up good.”

Chad chuckles. “I bet you’re happy that you and Jared encouraged me to go out with Alex, huh?”

Jensen smiles widely and nods. “It was the best advice I’ve ever given.” Jensen stares at both of them for a few moments. “You know what? I think this was Brock’s way of showing us that you guys have his blessing. Maybe he has a hand in all of this, and he gave us the key to find Jared and Brooke through Alex. I don’t believe in coincidences.”

Chad’s eyes tear up and he smiles at Jensen and then at Alex. “You’re right. Couldn’t have been more perfect. Now let’s wait for the surgery to be over so we know Jare will be okay for sure.”

They wait for a few hours, in the meantime Jensen grabs something to eat from the cafeteria and facetimes with his mom, to let her know how things are going and also to see Brooke. Donna assures him that her granddaughter - her words - is doing fine, she’s feeding Brooke with formula and she accepted it well. Jensen knows Jared wanted to only breastfeed Brooke for as long as possible but sadly plans had to be changed. Jensen will take it if it means his family is all good and healthy, and back to his side.

Finally after what seems like a lifetime, the doctor comes to let them know the surgery is over and everything went well, that Jared is now settled comfortably in the recovery room. Everyone cheers, and Jensen feels like a huge weight has been lifted from his shoulders. Jensen asks if he can stay the night with Jared, and the doctor allows him to, since Jared has a regular room after the recovery period and is not in the ICU. He also lets them know it’s gonna take a couple of hours before they’re allowed to see him and that they can go home for now if they wish, Jared just needs some time to recover from the surgery.

Alan convinces Jensen to go home and take a shower, also to get a few things so he can spend the night with Jared. Jensen reluctantly agrees, it has been a long day after all and he could use a shower. Plus it’s an opportunity to see his daughter.

Once they arrive home, Donna comes running to greet them. She gives Jensen a long hug, asking how’s Jared and he fills her in. She tells Jensen Brooke is taking a nap so Jensen takes the opportunity to take a shower before going to see his daughter.

After showering and packing, Jensen spends some time with Brooke, who is now awake. Jensen has missed his baby so much and it’s so good to be with her again. He takes the opportunity to snap some pictures of her and some selfies with her so he can show Jared later. Donna makes Jensen have dinner before leaving, claiming he needs to remain strong so he can be with Jared, and he eats while holding Brooke with one arm.

Soon after eating Jensen is back at the hospital, and the nurse tells him Jared has already been transferred to his room. She leads him there, and when she opens the door Jensen immediately locates Jared on the bed. The nurse tells him Jared will sleep at least until tomorrow, his body needs some time to recover.

She leaves them alone and Jensen quietly approaches. Jared is sleeping and he looks peaceful. His torso is bare and there are bandages around his chest, a nasal cannula on his face, his skin is littered with large bruises and it does indeed look like he has lost some weight. Jared looks very fragile right now and Jensen vows then and there he will do anything to make sure Jared is healthy and back in shape again. He takes Jared’s hand in his and caresses his hair with his other hand, leaning down to be close to his face.

“Hey Jay, I’m here. You’re gonna be fine, don’t worry. Everything will be okay, you’re gonna recover and our daughter is safe and sound, looking more beautiful than ever. I’m here with you and I won’t leave you for a second, alright? We are together again and nothing will change that ever again. I love you so much, my shaggy-haired giant.”

Jensen sits down on the armchair next to the bed, pushing it as close to Jared as it will go. He rests his chin on the mattress close to Jared’s face and keeps caressing his hair as he sings their song to him, hoping it will make Jared rest better.

_Wise men say  
Only fools rush in  
But I can't help falling in love with you_

_Shall I stay?_   
_Would it be a sin_   
_If I can't help falling in love with you?_

Jensen sings to Jared a couple of times, and begins to feel exhausted himself. This has probably been the longest day in Jensen’s life. And he sends a silent _thank you_ up there that it all ended well.

Jensen gets up so he can plant a lasting kiss on Jared's forehead.

“Sleep well, my darling. I’ll be here when you wake up.”

**TO BE CONTINUED... FOR THE LAST TIME.**


	20. Chapter 20

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> We reached the final chapter of Serendipity! I'll say more in the final notes as usual, but there's something I'd like to bring up now, an impression I have with this story and I'd like to see if you guys agree with me.
> 
> From the summary and the first moment, it was clear that Jared was the central point in this story, the "protagonist" of it. But as I wrote it, I started having another impression, even talked to my beta Mag about it. It's not Jared the main focus of this story, it's Jensen. How Jensen goes from being an uncaring, selfish dick to someone completely different, willing to do anything for the man he learned how to love, the man who didn't change him but brought to the surface what was buried deep inside. Willing to also become a father to a child that he didn't conceive, but has the blood of the man he loves, a child he learned how to love as his own even before birth. Of course Jared is a vital part of this story, it revolves around him after all, he's the one who barged into this family's life without warning, who lost everything after becoming pregnant, who had to accept living a lie so he could protect himself and his baby and have a roof over his head. 
> 
> But if you look at the story under another perspective, the true miracle happened in Jensen. He found his true self throughout this story, he wanted to become someone better so he would be worthy of Jared and also Brooke. I just wanted to point that out because I think it's very important to. What are you guys' vision on this? I'd love to hear!

_**Jared** _

Consciousness comes back slowly. Jared stays in that limbo between asleep and awake and he feels like floating. It feels weird because Jared doesn’t remember going to sleep and now he’s already waking up. He keeps his eyes closed trying to gather his thoughts.

The cabin. Jared is in that stupid cabin, Justin kidnapped Brooke and him and hid them far away from everything. Jared has no means to get away or to contact Jensen. God, he misses Jensen. He wishes he could see him again, he misses him so much. Jared wonders if he will ever be able to escape this nightmare.

He fears even opening his eyes, afraid to do it and see those cabin walls again, knowing he’s in for another day in this place with Justin. It’s not fair. He wishes there was a way for Jensen to find him.

There’s something on Jared’s hand, like a weight on it. He frowns lightly and finally gathers courage to open his eyes and see what it is. When he does it, he’s almost blinded by the light coming from a window, which is weird because Jared is pretty sure there were heavy curtains on the windows. Maybe he forgot to close them off last night?

Jared tries again, opening his eyes slowly and blinking a few times to adjust to the light. The first thing he notices is that he’s not at the cabin. The walls are all white and this is a totally different place. Jared turns his head to one side and sees the window, and he can spot some buildings outside. This is weird. Turning his head in the opposite direction, Jared’s heart stops beating as he sees who is sleeping in an armchair next to him.

It’s _Jensen_.

Jared’s throat closes up and it all comes rushing back to him all of a sudden. There was that doctor, Jared gave him a note. He must have found a way to contact Jensen because he appeared at the cabin and Jared was so insanely relieved and happy to see Jensen there.

_Jensen found him._

Jared doesn’t remember much about what happened later, he knows Justin showed up and they started to fight upstairs. Jared honestly has no idea what happened after, but he gathers he got hurt somehow because he’s pretty sure he’s in a hospital. And now that he thinks about it, everything hurts. A _lot_. It feels like Jared was hit by a semi, twice. It’s like there’s an elephant sitting on his chest, it hurts so much. Whatever happened to him must have been tough. But Jared tries to push the pain to the back of his mind for now because he’s feeling something else, something that feels like heaven.

Jensen is holding his hand.

Jared looks at their joined hands and then at Jensen’s face, and his eyes fill with tears, but this time they are happy tears. He smiles among them and clears his throat.

“Jen… Jensen.”

Jared squeezes Jensen’s hand, and his boyfriend slowly opens his eyes, blinking a few times. When his gaze lands on Jared and Jensen realizes he’s awake and smiling, he’s up on his feet in a second. Jensen frames Jared’s face with his hands and leans down, giving him a huge smile as his own eyes tear up.

“Jay, you’re awake! Thank God, I was so worried!”

Jared smiles back, his own tears falling down his face. “Jen, you found me.”

Jensen plants a lingering kiss on Jared’s forehead, and he feels like his whole body is warming up from that spot outward. Jensen pulls away and rests his forehead against Jared’s. They share a long and deep look as Jensen caresses Jared’s face with his thumb.

“I did. Because you were so brave and gave us the clue on where to look. I missed you so much Jay, I was so afraid I was never gonna see you again. I’m so glad you’re here, you have no idea. Everything is gonna be okay now.”

Jared can see the deep emotion in Jensen’s eyes, and he’s pretty sure he’s mirroring it. Jared was so scared he would never see Jensen again, having him here is a miracle.

They stay in silence like this for a while, not saying anything, just enjoying each other and the fact that they’re reunited. Jared wants to reach up and touch Jensen too, but when he tries his arms feel like they weigh a ton and they hurt, so Jared gives up and leans into Jensen’s touch.

Eventually Jensen pulls back and looks down at him while caressing his hair. “I think I should go get the doctor, let him know you’re awake.”

Jared shakes his head. “No, please, not yet. Can you tell me first what happened? I don’t remember anything, just you arriving and me arguing with Justin and that’s all. I want you to tell me what happened, please. Then you can go get the doctor.”

Jensen studies him for a few moments and nods, sitting down on the armchair again. He holds Jared’s hand as he speaks.

“Well, basically when you tried to free yourself from Justin’s grip you lost your balance. You were right on top of the staircase and you fell backwards, rolling down the steps. You…” Jensen licks his bottom lip before continuing, as if it’s hard for him to relive it. “You landed by my feet, unconscious. I was so scared, Jay. I was even afraid to check for a pulse, see if you were alive. But thank God I could feel it, I know you were still there. Chad called an ambulance and they brought you here.”

Jared nods, frowning as he takes everything in. “And when was it? How long have I been here?”

“It was just yesterday Jay. You’ve been here for one night.”

Jared sighs, relieved. Looks like it wasn’t that bad. “And what about the extent of my injuries? I feel very sore.”

Jensen winces in sympathy. “I can imagine, Jay. It was a pretty ugly fall. But there’s nothing too serious, you had a mild concussion, a twisted ankle and three broken ribs. They had to perform surgery to mend them and also your lung, since one of them punctured it. You’re gonna need a while to recover and will be pretty much on bedrest for a few weeks, but you’ll be just fine. I’ll take care of you and make sure you’re brand new.”

Jared nods, relieved that all his injuries are treatable and he will be okay. Then he asks the most important question. “Where is Brooke, Jen? Is she okay?”

Jensen nods, smiling. “Yeah, she’s just fine. My mom is taking care of her, don’t worry. She says it’s her pleasure.”

Jared’s eyes widen as he remembers everything that was happening with Donna before Justin took them. “Your mom? But she didn’t… I mean she wasn’t talking to us and…”

“Jay,” Jensen cuts him off, shaking his head. “All of that fell to the ground when she learned you and Brooke were missing. She realized we did what we did to protect her, and she forgives us. She was very worried about you two, and she has been taking good care of Brooke. She already volunteered to help with the baby for as long as we need while you recover. She keeps referring to Brooke as her granddaughter so I’m guessing she’s truly okay with everything. She is very eager to see you so you can talk and mend things.”

Jared feels very relieved that at least this is taken care of. He thinks of his daughter and suddenly remembers something, looking down at his bandaged chest. He looks back up at Jensen.

“Jen, how is she feeding if I’m here?”

Jensen shrugs. “Well, my mom had to get her formula since you couldn’t feed her. Also the doctor said you won’t be able to do it for a while since you’re on meds and also recovering from the surgery. I know it’s not what you wanted Jay, but my mom said she’s doing fine with the formula. It’s gonna be okay.”

Jared purses his lips, a little upset that he won’t be able to feed Brooke anymore, he’s gonna take a long time to recover and when he’s off the meds and healthy again, his breast milk will probably have dried up. But he tries to tell himself they are all fine, they’re together and that’s what matters. He can live with this.

“I miss my baby,” he says lamely.

Jensen smiles and fishes his phone out of his pocket, then he shows Jared the screen. “I took some pictures of her last night when I went home for a shower. See, she’s doing just fine.”

Jared sees their baby’s cute face, and in some pictures Jensen is holding her. Jared’s eyes tear up again, he’s so relieved she’s safe and sound, that’s the only thing he wanted.

They have a while to go as Jared recovers, but knowing they will be fine eventually brings a huge joy to Jared’s heart. It’s all okay.

*

The doctor comes by to check on Jared and explain more thoroughly the extent of his injuries and how his recovery will go. He tells Jared he must be patient if he wants to have a full and faster recovery. Jared promises to do everything the doctor says, and he tells Jared he will need to do some breathing exercises to expand his lung since it shrunk after the puncturing. The doctor leaves Jared with the nasal cannula to make it easier for him to breathe for now, and tells him to try and not move too much because of his ribs since it can cause a lot of pain and even delay his recovery. And also that if things go okay, Jared can go home in a few days. That’s the best part.

After the doctor leaves, Jensen sits on the armchair and turns serious. “Jay, there’s something I want to ask you.”

He looks embarrassed and Jared wonders what that’s all about. “Sure Jen, what is it?”

Jensen purses his lips. “Did Justin, he… did he try to… well, did he touch you in any way?”

Jared immediately understands where Jensen is getting at, and he completely understands his concerns. He shakes his head. “No, he didn’t. I didn’t give him any opportunity to do so. I would even lock my bedroom door at night so he wouldn’t get in, and when he tried to come on to me I pushed him away and made sure he knew how amazing you are in bed. I think he got the memo. Eventually.”

Jensen chuckles. “Oh man, that must have been a funny scene.”

Suddenly Jared remembers something. “By the way, how did the doctor find you so fast? I couldn’t write down your number on the note because Justin was coming.”

Jensen smiles at him. “You won’t believe it. Stephen - that’s the doctor’s name - is Alex’s roommate. Alex as in Chad’s boyfriend.”

Jared’s eyes widen. “Oh my God, really?? What are the chances of that??”

“Well, I guess I was really meant to find you. Stephen arrived at his house and Chad and Alex were there. He told the guys about what had happened, how he found the whole situation weird and mentioned the note, and that he had to find a guy named Jensen Ackles. Chad of course connected the dots, showed him a picture of you and Brooke and he recognized you. He gave Chad the address and he called me, we were on our way in just a few minutes. You were very brave and smart Jay. You found a way to escape and it worked perfectly.”

Jared sighs relieved. “I’m gonna want to meet Stephen and thank him a thousand times for this.”

Jensen nods. “Same here.”

A little later, Jared convinces Jensen to go to the cafeteria to grab something to eat since he hasn’t eaten since last night’s dinner. After he leaves, a nurse brings Jared a meal. He thanks her and as he sees the food he realizes he’s actually hungry, he hasn’t really eaten anything in a long time. But when he tries to lift his arm to reach for the plastic spoon, a sharp pain shoots through it, and his sore ribs also complain. He tries again, lifting only his forearm but it’s useless, it just hurts too much and it feels like his arm weighs a freaking ton. Jared feels frustrated as he watches the food in front of him and can’t reach it. It’s not even the most delicious food in the world but Jared just wishes he could eat_ something_. Jared sighs and leans back on the bed, turning his face away from the tray and looking outside the window.

Jensen returns not too long after and makes a confused face as he sees the untouched food in front of Jared.

“What’s up, Jay? Aren’t you gonna eat that?”

Jared shrugs, not thrusting himself to look at Jensen. “Not really hungry.”

Jared feels Jensen coming closer, he places his fingers on Jared’s chin and carefully turns his head around to face him.

“Jay, what’s going on? I know you by now, okay? Please you can trust me.”

As Jared stares at Jensen he feels tears prickling behind his eyes. God, he’s pathetic. He purses his lips and clears his throat.

“It’s just that… it’s stupid. But I can’t.”

Jensen frowns. “Can’t what?”

Jared swallows hard. “Can’t move. My chest feels like it’s on fire when I try to lift my arms, and they feel so sore, they hurt a lot. I tried to do it, but I… I couldn’t.”

Jared finishes in a very low voice and lowers his eyes, embarrassed to face Jensen. His boyfriend lets go of his face and pushes the tray a bit to the side so he can sit on the bed. Jensen takes the spoon and bowl, filling the spoon with soup and bringing it to Jared’s face.

“Here.”

Jared looks at the spoon in Jensen’s hand and he swallows hard, not moving.

Jensen sets the spoon down. “Jay, it’s okay. No big deal. You’re recovering and I want to take care of you. Let me do it, please? I really want to take care of you.”

Jared just bites his bottom lip and looks at Jensen, still feeling unsure. Jensen lifts the spoon back up and lifts and eyebrow.

“Jay, don’t make me do the airplane.” Jared’s eyes widen. “You know I’ll do it. I can even practice for when Brooke starts eating food. Come on, open up the gate!”

Jensen starts making an engine noise and Jared can’t help but chuckle, then gasps when his chest twinges painfully. He relents and opens his mouth for Jensen.

“There you go! See, it wasn’t so hard was it? We are a team, right?”

Jared nods, he is right. Jensen feeds him everything the nurse brought with all the care in the world, being attentive to wipe Jared’s mouth and chin whenever something spills. Jared’s heart warms up with Jensen’s simple but immensely important gesture. It’s very intimate and Jared can feel the amount of love Jensen pours into it, he is able to understand Jensen really meant when he said he wants to take care of Jared, and he couldn’t be more grateful for Jensen.

Jared is a very lucky man.

*

Jensen spends the rest of the day and the night with Jared, despite his protests for Jensen to go home and get some rest. He claims he’s not leaving Jared’s side, and who is he to argue?

During the next day, he receives some important visitors. First, Donna comes to see him, and before Jared can ask, she tells him Brooke is hanging out with uncles Chad and Alex. She sits by Jared’s side and gives him a long hug, making Jared feel instantly warmer. They have a nice talk, Donna apologizes for being so harsh on them and Jared apologizes for lying to her. She claims to understand now why they did it, and actually thanks Jared for going with it since the idea of having a grandchild after Brock passed was the only thing that kept her going. Jared is very grateful that there are no more lies between them and that Donna has finally come around. She tells him that Jensen and he have her blessing, and that she’s very happy to have Brooke as her granddaughter, and that to her it also doesn’t matter they don’t share the same blood, she loves her nonetheless. Jared loves this family.

Later, a couple hours after Donna leaves for her turn to watch her granddaughter, Jensen enters the room with Chad, Alex and Stephen. Jared is very excited to see them all, and he thanks them for everything, especially Stephen. The doctor tells him he’s really happy he was able to help and for the fortunate fact that he is Alex’ roommate. Jared tells him he doesn’t believe in coincidences at all. He knows this was fate, it was the way the universe found to put Jensen in the right path to find Jared. When the boys leave, Jared has a new friend in Stephen and so does Jensen.

Jared really wants to see Brooke, but Jensen has told him they decided not to bring her to the hospital since her immune system is still forming and they don’t want to risk her catching anything. Jared agrees, he wants her baby to be safe from infections but it doesn’t mean he isn’t sad to be away from her for so long and isn’t eager to be with her again.

Soon, he tells himself. Soon they will all be home together.

_ **Jensen** _

Jensen gets a call from Mark Hartley the next day, while Jared is sleeping. He steps out of the room to take it.

“Hello, Jensen. I’m sorry to bother you, but there’s something important that we need to discuss. My son Justin included.”

Hearing Justin’s name makes Jensen’s blood boil. “I don’t have anything to talk to Justin about! He kidnapped Jared and my daughter and you can rest assured that I’m gonna press charges against him. The only reason I haven’t yet is because Jared needs me but I’ll be doing it as soon as I can.”

“Look Jensen, I understand your side and I don’t blame you. But I’d like for you to give us an opportunity to talk. Justin is very sorry for what he did and he would like for a chance to apologize to you and Jared. Please, that’s all I’m asking. A chance to talk.”

Jensen stays in silence for a few moments, pinching the bridge of his nose. “Well, I'll have to run this by Jared first, after all he was the victim in this. I’ll let you know what he says.”

Jared is wary at first, when Jensen tells him Mark and Justin want to talk. Jensen can see Jared is afraid to see Justin again.

“Jay, we are only doing this if you want to. Apparently Justin is sorry for everything and wants to apologize, and also they want to talk to us. But only if you’re comfortable with it.”

Jared considers it for a while. “I’ll do it if you’re here with me.”

Jensen scoffs. “As if I’d ever leave you alone with them.”

*

Mark and Justin arrive a few hours later, and while Mark shakes Jensen’s hand and thanks him for the opportunity, Justin can’t even look into his eyes, he keeps his gaze down barely murmuring a _hello_ to Jensen.

Well, he _should_ feel ashamed alright, Jensen needs to summon all his inner power not to punch him right there.

Jensen opens the door to Jared’s room and immediately sits by his side, taking his hand. Mark and Justin sit on the small couch and Mark gives him a smile.

“Thank you for agreeing with this, Jared. I’m very glad to know you’re recovering well. And Justin here wanted to apologize for everything. I’m very aware that an apology won’t cut it, but it’s the least he could do.”

Jared looks from Mark to Justin, who slowly lifts his gaze and stares at Jared.

“I’m so sorry for everything I did, Jared. I don’t know what got into me to act like that. Actually… I do know.” Jensen’s gaze travels to Jensen. “It was Jeff who convinced me.”

Jensen leans forward, his eyes widening and heart skipping a beat. “_What_?”

Justin sighs. “Well, I don’t know if you know this already but it was Jeff who found me in the first place. He went to San Antonio and dug up Jared’s past until he found we used to date. He contacted me in Paris saying he was a friend of Jared’s. I told him about Jared telling me he was pregnant with my child and then it being a false alarm. Then he told me he actually had a baby and when I did the math I knew it was mine. I was so furious, I returned home immediately. He was also the one who reached my father and told him everything, making him go see Donna before the deadline I gave you. When none of this worked to split you guys up, he came to me again with the idea of taking Jared somewhere hidden. He convinced me that way Jared would go back to me, that if he was away from Jensen those feelings would die. He said he would help me find a place and work a plan to take Jared and Brooke there. And this was the only way for me to have the guy I loved and my daughter back. I was blind Jared, I still have feelings for you and was easily manipulated. I didn’t stop to consider the harm I was causing you, all I wanted was for you to be mine at all costs and I thought I was doing the right thing. I only realized my mistake too late, when you were falling down the stairs. I’ll never forgive myself for doing this to you Jared, I can’t apologize nearly enough for this. Could you maybe try to forgive me?”

Jensen is furious at learning Jeff is behind all of this. Apparently he hadn’t caused harm enough, he needed more. Jensen can’t believe Jeff went this far. Jensen needs him to pay for it somehow, he just doesn’t know how.

Jared is pensive for a few moments and he looks at Jensen, who smiles at him and squeezes his hand. Jared nods and looks at Justin.

“I can try. But everything is still too fresh, I need some time.”

Justin nods. “Fair enough. And thank you.”

Mark clears his throat. “Actually… we would like to ask something from both of you. I know it’s hard and I know what Justin did was wrong. But I’d like to ask you not to press charges against him. I don’t condone what Justin did for a second, but I know my son isn’t like this and he regrets what he did. We were thinking about placing all the blame on Jeffrey, telling the police he was the one who came up with everything and he was keeping both Jared _and_ Justin in the cabin. He was the one who rented the cabin, it was under his name. He probably assumed he would never get caught and got too cocky. I know it’s a lot to ask from you, but if you could not press charges against Justin and reinforce the version that Jeff did all of this, we would be forever grateful.”

Jensen thinks everything through, he doesn’t know what to do. It’s hard to decide. What Justin did was wrong, but Jensen also wants Jeff to pay for what he did and that’s the way to do it.

Jared squeezes Jensen’s hand again, looking at him and winking before turning to them.

“Fair enough. We can do just as you asked, I can say that Jeff was behind all of this and take the blame off Justin, paint him as another victim of Jeff, no problem...”

Justin smiles relieved. “Thank you Jared, I…”

“...under one condition.”

Justin’s eyes widen and Jensen frowns, wondering what Jared will come up with.

“Which condition, Jared?” Mark asks, leaning forward.

Jared addresses Justin. “That you give up on your rights as Brooke’s father. I want for her to be officially Jensen’s daughter as she already is, and you won’t do anything to change it, you won’t ask for a DNA test, anything. That is my condition. You accept it and we will tell the police anything you want us to, so Justin won’t take the blame. You don’t accept it, I’ll press charges and say Justin kidnapped me and Brooke, I can get Dr. Amell to testify and everything. And then good luck going after your rights as her father. It’s up to you.”

Jensen feels so proud of Jared right now he wants to shout and punch the air. He couldn’t have come up with a more perfect solution himself. He caresses the back of Jared’s hand with his thumb to let him know it is an amazing idea. Justin looks down and purses his lips. Even though Jared’s idea is amazing since Jensen gets to keep being Brooke’s father for real, he can’t help feeling somewhat sad for Justin. Despite everything, he’s a father too.

Justin looks up again at Jared with pleading eyes, his voice broken. “I just… I don’t want to be cut out from Brooke’s life completely. Despite everything she’s my daughter and I’d like to keep seeing her.”

Jared gives him a sympathetic smile. “I don’t want to keep you from seeing Brooke, Justin. I would feel like an asshole if I kept you two apart. I can understand that you are sorry for what you did, that you were under a bad influence and I know you’re not a bad person deep inside. You can see Brooke, just not alone. But yes, you can be a part of her life. You’re her family too. What I want though, is for Jensen to have the role of her other father. It’s only fair and these are my terms.”

Justin lowers his head and nods. “Fair enough. It’s more than I deserve..”

“Consider it done Jared,” Mark says. “I wish my son could be Brooke’s father but he ruined this chance and will pay for his decision. I’m thankful that you’re allowing us to be a part of her life, I promise you we will honor your terms. Thank you for doing this.”

Once Justin and Mark leave, Jensen pulls Jared for a hug. Jared buries his face in Jensen’s neck since he still can’t hug him back.

“Thank you so much for this Jay, you’re a genius. I can’t believe I get to be Brooke’s father and nobody will get in the way of that anymore.”

Jensen pulls away a bit and Jared gives him a small shrug. “The idea hit me suddenly and I knew it would be perfect. Can’t believe it worked and we are free to raise our daughter in peace.”

Jensen leans forward to give Jared a long kiss. “We are gonna make an amazing family.”

Jensen suddenly has an idea, and he needs to go shopping. But this time, he will go alone.

_ **Jared** _

Jared is discharged from the hospital a few days later. He just cannot wait to go home, especially so he can see Brooke. He misses his baby like crazy, and not even facetiming with her is enough. He still can’t believe everything worked out and Jensen gets to be Brooke’s official father, that he found a way to make Justin give up on the idea of going after his rights. Jared knows what he did was wrong, he agreed to lie to the police in exchange for this, but he doesn’t regret it. Sometimes you gotta do what you gotta do to protect your family.

Jared is feeling a tad better, he can already move his arms even if his movements are slow and stiff. Yesterday he just managed to eat a whole meal by himself and it felt great. Not that he hated having Jensen feed him though. The gesture spoke volumes to Jared. He is still feeling very sore in his torso because of his ribs, and it’s harder to breathe on his own. He has been doing the breathing exercises the nurse taught him, and Jensen made sure to learn those as well so he can help Jared. He still has a while to go before he’s completely recovered, and he also needs to heal his twisted ankle. But it’s alright, all that matters is that Jared is back where he belongs, by Jensen and Brooke’s side. Everything else is just a detail.

After signing the discharge papers, Jensen very carefully helps Jared dress and sit in the hospital wheelchair, making sure not to jostle his ribs. He wheels Jared to the parking lot alongside a nurse. Just as carefully Jensen helps Jared into the car, making sure he’s comfortable and buckled up. They ride home in companionable silence, holding hands. Jared hopes he stays away from hospitals for a while, in the past few months he has had enough of those to last a lifetime.

When they finally arrive, Jared tears up when he sees the house and Jensen gives him a worried look.

“Jay, what is it?”

Jared nods, pursing his lips. “Nothing, it’s stupid. Just missed this place a lot, that's all. First we had to leave because of your mother and then Justin took me and I thought I might never see it again. I’ve really started to see this place as home.”

Jensen leans over to plant a sweet kiss on Jared’s mouth. “It’s our home, Jay. You can be sure of it.”

Soon, Chad comes out of the house bringing a wheelchair they rented for the period Jared is recovering. Once he’s settled in it Jensen pushes him inside, and Jared lets out a wide smile as he takes in his surroundings. It’s great to be home again. Alan and Donna also greet Jared, both saying it’s amazing to have him home again.

“Where’s Brooke?” It’s the first thing Jared says and he can’t help it, he really misses his daughter.

“Don’t worry darling,” Donna says with a hand on his shoulder. “She’s sleeping in my bed. Let’s get you settled and then I’ll bring her to see you, alright?”

Jared nods and allows Jensen to take him to the boathouse. They had decided to stay there at least for now, since it’s easier for Jared as he doesn’t need to go up and down the stairs. And also they can have more privacy; though at first Jensen had suggested they go to his apartment but Donna had asked them to come back to the house so they could be close, at least for now. Chad had happily offered the boathouse and moved to Jared’s room. He had told Jared he has been spending a lot of time at Alex’s place anyway so it was really no big deal. Donna made sure to have the boathouse all ready for them, including a space for Brooke. When Jensen pushes Jared inside he smiles. It feels homey and perfect. There are framed pictures of them all over the place and Jared loves it.

Jensen helps Jared into the bed, and Jared already feels exhausted just from the small effort. It feels like he just ran a whole marathon when he actually did nothing. Jared takes some deep breaths to calm himself down, and Jensen stays by his side to make sure he’s okay. Once Jensen is sure Jared is alright he excuses himself for a few minutes, and then comes back holding Brooke in his arms.

Tears well up in Jared’s eyes as he finally sees his baby again, he has missed her so much.

“Oh my God, come here!”

Jensen smiles, looking emotional himself, and sits down beside Jared on the bed. Jared is still too weak and doesn’t trust himself to hold Brooke just yet, so Jensen brings her close to his chest and holds her there as Jared caresses her head and buries his nose in her tiny head.

“Oh my baby, Daddy missed you so much. You have no idea. I’m here now and I will never go away again, okay? Neither will Papa.”

Jensen gives Jared a sweet kiss. “Never. We are gonna be together forever, the three of us as a family. And maybe a few more eventual additions.”

Jared smiles and rests his head on Jensen’s shoulder, looking down at their baby. “Yeah, I’d like that.”

A little later Loretta brings a tray with delicious snacks for both of them, and a bottle for Brooke. Jared feels upset for not only not being able to breastfeed his daughter anymore but also for not even being able to hold her so she can feed. Jensen notices Jared seems upset as he stares at the bottle on the tray, so he picks it up and also takes a pillow, placing it on Jared’s lap. Jensen lies Brooke on it, and Jared wraps an arm around her as Jensen feeds her the bottle, his free arm around Jared.

“Why don’t you sing to her, Jay?”

Jared’s eyes widen. “Me? But you are the one with a great voice.”

“I’d love to hear yours.”

Jared swallows hard, looking down at Brooke and speaking in a low voice. “You know… when we were at that… place, I’d sing her song to her. So she wouldn’t forget about you.”

Jared looks up again and can see Jensen smiling tenderly at him, his eyes shining. “One more reason for you to sing, then. Please?”

Jared smiles back and leans against Jensen’s shoulder again, and he starts singing in a low voice as he watches his boyfriend feeding their daughter.

Everything feels right again in their little world.

*

For the next few weeks, Jensen completely devotes himself to taking care of Jared. He has taken a break from work so he could be with Jared 24/7, and even though Jared feels like he is a burden, he really appreciates the effort Jensen made. Jensen had even joked that Jared would grow tired of him being glued to his side all the time, and Jared told him that wasn’t possible. Jared had missed Jensen so much in the few days he spent at that cabin, he could never get enough of him. It feels great to spend so much time with Jensen, and they even play a lot of board games during that time. It feels like this is “their thing”, one of the first connections they shared and what helped bring them together. Jensen had gone shopping for new games so they could pass the time, even though their favorite is still The Game of Life.

Jared is finally able to walk again once the cast comes off, but he still needs to take it easy because of his sore ribs. He’s been doing well though, the fact that he was able to make a full recovery is something to be celebrated. He will never forget everything Jensen did for him, being by his side through it all and doing everything to make sure Jared was taken care of. Jared couldn’t have found a more perfect and amazing person. He feels proud for being able to reach inside Jensen and pull his true self out. He keeps proving to be an outstanding person, whom Jared feels very proud of.

They have lunch by the pool with Donna and Alan, and Brooke sleeping in the stroller next to them. It’s a beautiful Saturday afternoon and Jared feels so happy to be here with his new family, and that everything is normal again. Actually it’s much better now because there are no more secrets between them. Jared and Jensen are free to be a couple to the world, and most of all Donna knows the truth about Brooke and him. Jared doesn’t have that huge weight over his shoulders anymore, he can actually put his head on the pillow and really sleep at night, without worrying about what would happen when Donna found out the truth. Donna now understands why they had to do it, and even thanked Jared for agreeing with it, knowing how hard it was for him. She also thanked Chad profusely for going with the plan, also understanding what it cost him, since he was the one who lost his boyfriend and couldn’t mourn him properly. As a way to make it up to Chad, Donna had asked him for a picture of Brock and him. She made a larger copy of it and framed it, placing it on the mantle alongside other pictures of the family. Jared could see his friend was very touched with the gesture.

Donna also fully accepts Brooke as her granddaughter and that brings Jared a huge joy. Not only that, she accepts her as _Jensen’s_ daughter. She loves to spoil Brooke rotten and Jared doesn’t do anything to stop it. She has been of great help with the baby during the period Jared has been recovering and Jensen was busy taking care of him, and Jared is very grateful to her. Everything is much better now.

After lunch, Donna and Alan ask to bring Brooke to the park for a stroll and both boys say it’s okay. She invites them to come along since Jared is doing better, but he passes on the offer. Truth is, he could use some alone time with Jensen now that he’s feeling fine.

Jensen changes Brooke into a pretty pink dress and a bow, handing her over to her grandparents along with her diaper bag. Once they are gone, he turns to Jared who is sitting on their bed.

“So, now that it’s only us what do you want to do?”

Jared gives Jensen a significant smile. “I want you. Completely.”

Jensen lifts an eyebrow, licking his bottom lip. “You sure, Jay? I don’t want to hurt you in any way.”

“You could never hurt me, Jen. If we go easy it’s gonna be okay. I don’t want to wait any longer, I miss you so, so much. I want to have you again.”

Jensen climbs on the bed, gently lying Jared down and himself on top of his body, supporting himself with both arms on the bed so he can look at Jared.

“You have all of me Jay. I belong only to you, forever.”

A tear escapes Jared’s eye, and Jensen leans down to wipe it with a kiss. He takes care of Jared completely, worshipping his whole body very slowly, wanting to pay attention to every inch of it, specially to the scar from the surgery, kissing it gently. Jensen takes his time opening Jared up, and making sure he’s in a good position so he won’t hurt Jared. Jensen pushes in almost painfully slowly, and when he’s bottomed out Jared feels whole again. They’re finally one once more, and Jared is in his favorite place in the world. Jensen pushes out and in again also carefully not to jostle Jared and hurt his ribs, and it feels_ amazing_.

Jensen comes as he kisses Jared passionately, murmuring his name in his lips. As he pulls out, Jared doesn’t even have the time to feel the loss of Jensen as his boyfriend wraps his lips around his dick. Jensen places both hands on Jared’s hips to keep him in place and sucks him thoroughly until he comes. Jensen’s heat feels amazing around Jared and another tear slips from his eye as he shoots his load in Jensen’s mouth, chanting his name.

Jensen climbs up on the bed again and kisses Jared with both their tastes combined, the best taste in the world. Jared feels sleepy, he still gets tired easier, so after taking off the condom and throwing it in the general direction of the garbage bin, Jensen pulls the covers on top of them and snuggles closer to Jared, wrapping an arm around him. Jared knows they need to get up eventually to shower and get rid of the drying come, but not now. He lies on Jensen’s chest and lets out a sigh.

“Happy?” Jensen asks as he plants a kiss to Jared’s hair.

Jared smiles, sending a thanks to everything he has. At this moment he feels truly blessed.

“Happy doesn’t even begin to cover it.”

**Three months later**

“Jared and I would like to thank you all for being here on this special day on our baby Brooke’s christening. I want to take this opportunity to address another important matter.”

Jared watches as Jensen holds Brooke, who is wearing a very pretty white dress, and wonders what Jensen means. He takes a moment to admire them, and thinks about what an important day it was. Jared always meant to christen Brooke, and he also knows it was very important to Donna. Jensen and him decided to ask for her and Chad to be Brooke’s godparents, understanding how important it would be for both and also for themselves. Brooke couldn’t have better godparents.

After the ceremony at the church, everyone is gathered in the Ackles backyard for a nice lunch celebrating their baby, who is growing like a weed and getting cuter and cuter every day. Sometimes Jared can’t believe how lucky he is to have such an amazing and perfect daughter. Her eyes are getting greener too, just like Jared wished they would, so she can share this with Jensen.

Jared can see Chad and Alex, how happy they are. They have been looking for a place to move in together and start their own life. Jared couldn’t be more happy for his friend, for him finding a great guy who can make him happy again. Stephen is also here with his girlfriend, he has become a good friend to both Jared and Jensen after everything that’s happened and his role in helping them. Jared will forever be grateful to him.

Some friends of Donna, Alan and Jensen are also here. Jensen had slowly closed himself off from the world because of Jeff’s influence, but he slowly began reaching out to some old friends again and that makes Jared happy. Danneel is here too, alongside her new boyfriend Steve. She had contacted them a couple months ago, feeling ready to be friends again, with both of them. Jared and Jensen were open to it, and grateful, and she fell in love with Brooke immediately. Her boyfriend is also a very nice guy, and a musician, and they all ended up getting along nicely.

Jeff, they don’t know much about him. They had pressed charges just as they promised they would, but the police couldn’t find him to testify. It’s like the man evaporated from the face of the earth. Jensen heard a rumor at the agency that Jeff moved to the east coast and was starting over, using a different name. Jared knows for a fact that Mark Hartley had a _talk_ with Jeff, and that cemented his decision to leave. Jared doesn’t care about what was said, he just hopes that Jeff is gone for good, he will be glad if he doesn’t have to look at his face ever again. As a precaution, they had filed for a restraining order so Jeff can’t come close to any of them. Jensen has said he feels sorry for some poor guy out there who will probably be Jeff’s next prey. Some people never change.

Jensen has sold his shares of the agency to his father, who incorporated it into his own agency, and also bought Jeff’s shares. Jensen keeps working as a photographer, he has his own small studio and couldn’t be happier doing what he loves. Jared feels proud of him. Jared himself has started taking cooking classes. He learned he’s really good at it, naturally talented, and maybe someday he can work as a cook, even be a chef. Who knows. Jensen always tells him he’s sure Jared will have his own restaurant someday, he’s always trying Jared’s recipes and genuinely complimenting them.

Jared looks to his right and spots Justin and his parents sitting at one table. Things are slowly healing between them, Jared was able to forgive Justin and move on. He doesn’t want to keep hard feelings in his heart. He knows it’s harder for Jensen, but he’s trying too. Justin often visits Brooke and Jared can see he genuinely cares for her. He seems content about being able to just be a part of her life, and Jared wants his daughter to have this bond with her biological father, he would feel guilty to keep them apart. Mark and his wife also visit sometimes, and they also fell in love with Brooke. Justin has moved to Dallas so he could be closer to Brooke, and also started doing therapy. Jared can already see the change in him and it makes him happy. Justin had told Jared a few days ago that he’s seeing someone and that he really likes the guy, someone named Milo. Jared really hopes that works out.

Jared focuses on Jensen again, who is looking expectantly at him.

“Jay, months ago you were thrown into our lives unexpectedly, in a very hard moment for us. You were also fragile, but I didn’t want to give you a chance. I assumed it would be so easy to hate you, but it turned out to be impossible. I learned how to love you and it was so natural, so effortless. You brought back my true self, you broke down my walls. Falling for you was never a choice, it was inevitable. As was loving this little one here. You gave me the greatest of gifts and I love you more each passing day. By the way,” Jensen repositions Brooke in his arms. “I think Brooke wants out of this dress. What do you think? Can you take off her dress for me?”

Jared frowns deeper, he feels emotional at Jensen’s words but he doesn’t understand where his boyfriend is getting at. He thinks Brooke is doing just fine in her dress, but Jensen is giving him a hopeful look. Trusting him, Jared nods and as Jensen holds Brooke, he carefully takes her dress off. Jared notices she’s wearing a onesie underneath it, and Jensen holds the baby up so Jared has a full view of it. There are some words written on it.

_Daddy, will you marry my Papa?_

Tears explode from Jared’s eyes as he brings both hands to his gaping mouth, letting out a whisper. “Oh God.”

Donna carefully takes Brooke from Jensen, who gets down on one knee. Everyone falls completely silent as they watch the scene unfolding in front of them. Jensen reaches into his pocket and comes out with a velvet box, opening it up. Jared catches a glimpse of the ring through the tears, and Jensen takes it out of the box so Jared can see it better. It’s a flat band of platinum nested in a band of gold, with three stones embedded in it. One bigger shining diamond between two smaller stones.

“Jay, I had this ring especially made for you, that’s why it took a while for it to be ready. I wanted it to be very unique, something only you would have. Those smaller stones are Brooke’s and mine birthstones. It means that I’m marrying not only you but Brooke too, this represents the three of us as a family, a single unit made of three parts. You Jay, my shining star, in the middle being the center of our family, uniting all of us, bringing the three of us together to become one. And it’s unbreakable, infinite. Such as my love for you. Some things are just meant to be, my love. So will you be my husband? Will you and Brooke be my family?”

Jensen’s eyes are shining as he looks up at Jared, who feels a lump in his throat from so much emotion. When Jared thought Jensen couldn’t be more perfect, he proved him wrong once again. Before Jared can answer, they hear Brooke laughing at them, as she watches the scene from Donna’s lap. Jared smiles at their daughter and reaches out so he can pick her up.

“What do you think, Brooke? Should we say yes to Papa?”

Brooke screams with joy, and Jared smiles at Jensen through his tears. “I think she said yes a long time ago. And I say yes to you again, Jen. Of course I’ll marry you!”

Jensen smiles beautifully at Jared and places the ring on his finger. Jared looks at it for a second, it’s the most beautiful ring he has ever seen and it fits perfectly. It feels like a part of him already.

Jared pulls Jensen up, who wraps his arms around both of them and kisses Jared passionately as everyone starts clapping and cheering.

Jensen murmurs close to Jared’s face, so only he can hear. “I fully believe in serendipity now. The universe aligned for us to discover each other when we weren’t looking.” Jensen looks up at the sky for a moment. “Thank you for sending him to me, Brock. We know you are blessing us wherever you are.”

As Jensen looks down again Jared frames his face with a hand. He gives his _fiance_ a sweet smile as they share an intimate moment, their daughter between them, a thousand promises of a future for their little family and no further words needed.

Jensen is the best plot twist destiny could ever come up with.

**THE END.**

_“Forgetting the life I knew all along  
led me to cross your path somehow.  
Losing everything I loved feels okay now,  
For, on the way to losing myself I found you._

_Life is the same but it feels so new.  
You brought me to the good side of things.  
I would paint my heart with all the scars again,  
if life promises an eternity to let me call you mine._

_Serendipity for Me is You.”_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is the end of Serendipity! I can't express how fucking happy and proud I am for writing this story. When I first joined the fandom, the idea of an mpreg fic kinda grossed me out, I couldn't understand the concept. then I read a fic called Seahorse (I think) and it was good. I decided then that I *could* read mpreg if it was well written. I ended up reading a lot of them, and there are some AMAZING mpreg fics out there. There's one fic in particular which is my absolute favorite mpreg, which is called It Never Gets Easier by Fatebegins (sadly it's gone from Ao3), I've read it a number of times and I always say that it's a fic I really wish I had written because it's so good. 
> 
> I've wanted to write my own mpreg for a while but I wanted a good story. Then I remembered a soap opera that I really liked, that aired here a few years ago and I loved a particular couple. They had a great story that I knew it could work well with an mpreg. I borrowed some of the original plot, specially in the beginning of the story, as well as a lot of scenes that were too good not to use. But from a point forward I started making changes and made the story my own, because I didn't like the direction the original one took very much. I really hope you guys enjoy my version of this story (even if you don't know the original one). It took me a lot of time to come up with something I liked, I wanted to make the story even better and I hope I succeeded. All i wanted, as usual, was to show the huge love between the boys. 
> 
> If you're curious to see the original couple that originated this story, here are some original shots:
> 
> [these are them with the baby](https://s1.dmcdn.net/v/IAmlq1R63mmurYLYI/x1080) (original was a boy).  
[comforting her for the first time](https://s.glbimg.com/et/nv/f/original/2010/07/27/07b_edgar-abraca-marcela-q.jpg)  
[taking care of the black eye](https://66.media.tumblr.com/292d1d8e9be1a5baac5017ee3dcbb100/tumblr_q7d1zp92L01rlgbkbo1_540.jpg)  
[talking by the tree](https://correio-cdn2.cworks.cloud/fileadmin/acervo/tt_news/Monica_Vasku/marcela.jpg)  
[the ultrasound](https://66.media.tumblr.com/6fef8e0949ddf5146a5a712fb749a205/tumblr_q7d1xyITOV1rlgbkbo1_540.jpg)  
[the first kiss](https://s1.dmcdn.net/v/9keQI1LICdLGyXEEU/x1080)  
[checking pictures over coffee](https://66.media.tumblr.com/76800ad83ed0d4c1e6e5be5a6e80dce5/tumblr_q7dbdrQ4vx1rlgbkbo1_540.jpg)  
[the "I wanna be with you" scene](https://s.glbimg.com/et/nv/f/original/2010/09/21/01__.jpg)  
[the happy ending](https://i2.wp.com/s.glbimg.com/et/nv/f/original/2011/03/17/1.jpg)
> 
> What I really wanted with this story was to write something that I loved as much as It Never Gets Easier since I didn't write that one. And if one single person tells me this is their favorite mpreg story now, that I made them feel like that story made *me* feel, I'm gonna be the happiest person in the world.
> 
> I really want to thank Mag as always, for helping me SO MUCH with this story, giving a lot of great ideas as well as being my beta through it all. You're awesome, this fic wouldn't have been half as good if it weren't for you! Also Heather, for giving great ideas as well, thank you for the brainstorms!
> 
> Also, to my amazing wonderful artist Kaelysta, for working with me once again and creating incredible pieces! she couldn't do the last ones because of real life issues, but I'm incredibly thankful for making this story more beautiful. You rock!
> 
> And of course I want to thank you guys for sticking with me through it all! It makes me so happy that you enjoyed this story, reading your comments is always the highlights of my day! I'd love to hear your final thoughts on this, and also I'm open to writing a timestamp... what would you guys want to see that's not in the original story? I could use good ideas!
> 
> This story has become my longest one so far (as a stand alone piece not as a verse, that title still belongs to the September Verse lol), and I wasn't even expect that, but this fic took a life of its own! These characters wrote themselves, really!
> 
> I really hope you like the ending, I know some of you guys won't agree with my choices for Justin and Jeff, but I wanted to do something different than just having both arrested, and I really believe in a different path for Justin, that he could find some redemption, hope you guys understand it. Thanks again for reading this and for sticking with me once more! 
> 
> Love,  
Lullys


End file.
